There seems to be a lot of negative chat re Sabrina Carpenter’s new album cover, and while at least one of the rats thinks Sabrina is the pop world’s most beige offering since Missy Higgins, they both agree that women policing women isn’t on; unless it’s a grown woman advising another grown woman to keep her love of Taylor Swift on the d-low (because like every conservative grifter with a secret Grindr account knows, not all guilty pleasures are quote-unquote innocent). Also; Sam complains (again) about having his expensive douche bottle stolen and renounces Queen Street City Fitness, scene of the crime in question.He also wonders why the thief would take his douche over his bank card and Blunt umbrella (the rats decide this is yet another act of public desperation motivated by our national cost of living crisis). Finally, the rats are again in awe at people’s lack of capacity for satire, and in the same breath reconsider Michel Houellebecq’s Submission; though of course Houellebecq is a one-note writer, that note being the seemingly endless ballad of a sad white middle-aged man who’s never gotten laid in the way he’d like. His loathing of the middle class and France as a whole is just superb though, and the rats would recommend. Finally, the rats interrogate male laxity around having their mink blankets regularly laundered. As winter staples, it’s a unanimously timely and hard-hitting probing of a fractious and highly politicised topic (spoiler; you should wash your mink blankets every two weeks AT LEAST).Support us and get extra shit at patreon.com/RatsInTheGutter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
--------
43:20
Chris Bishop is Unattractive
Wow, what a week it’s been. And this is certainly not a valid review because what’s a week, where am I, whose jiz is this and what even IS time? Featured in this week’s democratically available episode is the following; the evils of physically repellant politicians being allowed to attend music awards that no one invited them to anyway; the particular sadness of Helen Keller and why we love her (despite how it sounds); the exquisite joys of our first Pride without the blight of Jojo Siwa, who is this seasons sexual-turncoat (think a reverse Cynthia Nixon, but dumber); how much better your own jiz tastes when it’s being scooped into your mouth from your own freshly used orifice by a gentleman caller; and finally, how the runaway success of beloved children’s book The Gruffalo DEFINITELY had something to do with Lola Young’s music career. Caution is advised. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
--------
40:05
Celestial Mantis
This week the rats discuss the proverbial (delusional?) lure of escape; whether it be from an alien abduction themed escape room, or between the bars of your frankly mis-advertised air bnb at Abu Ghraib, we ask what the true cost of freedom is (hint; it’s a flaying of the face). Also, are all bisexuals ‘vers’, or is this just another myth (much like bisexuality itself; just joking, we know it’s real). Johanna’s queer-card is put to the test (and nearly revoked) as she describes how strap-ons don’t do it for her, if only because she’s a tactile gal and wants the velvety kiss of the puss against her bare fingers (or something). Also also; Sam gets excited about a ‘celestial mantis’ which the internet tells him is a real live insect species, but which (if it isn’t AI) may also be a sign of the coming apocalypse as it’s only been seen by humans three times in the last 150 years (this recent being the third official sighting). Basically a heady brew of a podcast that’ll have your grown mother girding her loins through the wall as she pretends not to overhear (because you're still living with her, presumably, in these financially impossible times). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
--------
49:51
Gay for Pay (Yay)
Twin or tumour, length or girth, polyamory or cheating. The rats are asking hard questions this week and, like most media, reducing the nuances of reality to subsets of easily digestible binaries (you’re welcome). Notably, gender is explored and the fractious myth of ‘male loneliness’ which is actually, so the rats think and say, a symptom of toxic masculinity; which, they add, no one is immune from embodying, from doe-eyed twink to bullish butch (plaid-inclusive). But perhaps the most important takeaway from this week’s episode is how the new masc ideal is porn adjacent, and willing to suck. Dick for the right price; in fact, for those investing in themselves down OF paths no prom persona is complete without situational anal, because straight sex just doesn’t have the same (paying) audience. What does this mean for sexual politics broadly? Is there a future version of het masculinity that proves itself by systematically erasing its gag reflex? Listen to find out. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
--------
40:54
Recommended Protein
This episode is proudly supported by ReWired.org.nz - a non-judgemental support group for people who want to bring their Party 'n' Play into focus.As late-stage capitalism devours us all the rats turn inward, applying the same journalistic principles of critical analysis which they’re known for to the ways in which they move through the world. This includes looking at their morning routines, varied because one of the rats is obnoxiously sober atm while the other maintains the little sanity they’re afforded by carnie-life in the form of treats and intermittently playing dead. Neither rat is very fond of AI therapists though, and take the time to denounce what they consider to be the height of species-despair and un-dignity (seriously, just unalive yourself; is probably something an AI would say, and famously has said). If not self care then what might save us? Machine Girl? (The answer is yes and we’re very excited for their Auckland gig in June; not a paid promotion). Also, does being fed a load scooped out of your freshly painted love-chute count as recommended daily protein intake, or should you supplement? Find the answer to this and so many other poignant questions within (as in within the episode, not within like how your yoga instructor means when you’re on the mats for shavasana). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Auckland, the Babylon of Australasia. Home to award-winning creatives/ aspiring Jezebels Sam Te Kani and Johanna Cosgrove. Join them as they navigate daily life in a gorgeous South Pacific necropolis here at civilization’s end. Not deterred in the least by back-to-back lockdowns and a shortage of worthwhile intimacies, Te Kani and Cosgrove barrel headfirst into themes and experiences any modern twenty-something will recognise. From finding love when every other guy is a flakey bisexual, to the ego disorders of our noted socialites, and minor takeout addictions. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
New Zealand