PodcastsBusinessCongruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

Lisa Carpenter
Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.
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  • Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

    The Cost of Perfectionism: Why High Performance Demands Boundaries (Not Just Hustle) with Ciara Foy

    21/1/2026 | 1h 1 mins.
    Why do high-achieving women struggle most with the very thing they think defines them: performance?
    Ciara Foy spent years believing success meant hustle, billable hours, and proving her worth through perfectionism. She thrived in Toronto's cutthroat Bay Street legal world, worked with two assistants (one for 9-5, another for 5-midnight), and equated exhaustion with excellence. On the outside, she was crushing it. On the inside, she was crumbling under an eating disorder, control issues, and the belief that rest meant weakness.

    Who is Ciara Foy?
    Ciara is a Registered Holistic Nutritionist and author of "Empowered by Food," specializing in helping women over 40 thrive through perimenopause with hormone-balancing nutrition and metabolic health strategies. After leaving her high-stress Bay Street executive career to reclaim her own health, Ciara discovered that conventional diet approaches fail perimenopausal women facing the perfect storm of declining estrogen, muscle loss, and metabolic shifts. Known for her warm yet no-nonsense approach, Ciara believes that while doctors treat disease, they weren't trained in metabolic optimization or prevention.

    Ciara's Story: From Perfectionism to Self-Preservation
    Ciara's definition of success has been rewritten more times than most people attempt in a lifetime. From corporate law clerk billing insane hours to stay-at-home mom drowning in isolation and postpartum depression, from building two full-service weight loss clinics to navigating divorce, health breakdowns, and devastating loss, Ciara has learned that high performance without boundaries isn't performance at all. It's just slow-motion burnout dressed up as ambition.

    In her 20s, success meant external validation through billable hours and perfectionism. It meant developing an eating disorder after getting fired, then proving everyone wrong by landing a role at one of Canada's top law firms. It meant saying yes to abandoning her law career dreams when her ex-husband suggested she stay home with their daughter, then feeling resentful and lost in the monotony of motherhood.

    The breaking point came when pregnancy forced her to confront the eating disorder head-on. She made a deal with God: help me overcome this, and I'll devote my life to helping other women do the same. That promise launched her into holistic nutrition, where knowledge became the key that unlocked freedom from food fear and perfectionist thinking.

    But the real transformation came in her 40s, when life handed her grief, loss, and circumstances that would have decimated the hustle-obsessed version of herself. When she lost her 11-month-old puppy Torrin recently, the pain was devastating. But instead of abandoning herself the way she once would have, Ciara held the line on the foundational habits that keep her whole: sleep, movement, three square meals. Not because she's superhuman, but because she's finally learned that high performance requires self-compassion, not just willpower.

    Today, at 49, Ciara defines success not by how much she can do, but by the freedom to choose how she shows up. She works with high-achieving women who, like her younger self, are running on fumes and calling it ambition.

    What we talk about in this episode:

    Why perfectionism is really about control, not excellence – Ciara reveals how her eating disorder emerged after getting fired, and why the belief "I have to be perfect to be loved" nearly destroyed her health and relationships.

    The cost of abandoning yourself for someone else's version of success – How leaving her law career dreams to become a stay-at-home mom left Ciara isolated, resentful, and 70 pounds heavier, searching for external validation she could no longer get from work.

    What high performance actually requires in your 40s and 50s – Forget hustle. Ciara explains why boundaries, sleep, self-compassion, and treating your body like you treat your babies are non-negotiables for sustainable success.

    How to stay in integrity with yourself when life falls apart – When devastating loss hit, Ciara didn't push through or perform her way out of grief. She held the line on foundational habits while giving herself permission to feel everything.

    Why knowledge is the key to food freedom – How understanding the "why" behind nutrition gave Ciara agency over her body and broke the all-or-nothing perfectionist patterns that kept her stuck.

    The difference between high performance and high hustle – Success used to mean billable hours and burning the candle at both ends. Now it means executing the things that matter at a very high level while having the courage to let everything else go.

    What it means to treat your body like your baby – Ciara's powerful reframe: your body relies on you the way your children do. Would you deprive your baby of sleep, nourishment, and care? Then why are you doing it to yourself?

    How to maintain muscle and metabolic health through perimenopause – Why eating three square meals during grief wasn't about willpower, it was about self-preservation and refusing to lose the strength she's worked decades to build.

    Why freedom is the ultimate success metric – After chasing external validation her entire life, Ciara now measures success by one thing: the ability to choose how, when, and with whom she shows up.

    This episode is for you if you've ever:

    Believed that success meant hustle, billable hours, and proving your worth through exhaustion

    Abandoned your own dreams or career to accommodate someone else's vision for your life

    Struggled with perfectionism, control issues, or the belief that you have to be perfect to be loved

    Found yourself numbing with food, scrolling, or other behaviors when the pressure became too much

    Felt resentful being everyone's rock while quietly crumbling inside

    Wondered if you're a high performer or just someone who's really good at running on fumes

    Sacrificed sleep, movement, or basic self-care because "there's too much to do"

    Lost yourself in motherhood, a relationship, or a role that looked good on the outside but felt empty inside

    Struggled to eat or care for yourself during grief, stress, or major life transitions

    Built impressive external success while feeling disconnected from your own body and needs

    Equated rest with weakness and boundaries with selfishness

    Wondered what high performance actually looks like in your 40s and 50s when hustle stops working

    How to redefine high performance without burning out
    Here's what most high-achieving women don't realize: the version of success you built in your 20s and 30s will absolutely destroy you in your 40s and beyond. The hustle, the perfectionism, the belief that rest is weakness – those patterns don't just stop working, they start actively harming you.

    Ciara's story shows us that real high performance isn't about how much you can do. It's about how well you can execute what actually matters while protecting the foundational habits that keep you whole. It's about having boundaries that aren't negotiable, even when life gets hard. Especially when life gets hard.

    Because when grief hits, when loss devastates you, when circumstances spiral beyond your control, you can't hustle your way out. You can't perfect your way through. You can only lean on the integrity you've built with yourself, the promises you've kept, the habits that hold you together when everything else falls apart.

    The cost of staying stuck in hustle-mode isn't just burnout. It's losing muscle you can't easily rebuild. It's teaching your body it can't trust you. It's arriving at 50 frail, exhausted, and wondering why success feels so hollow.

    Ready to stop confusing hustle with high performance?
    The Congruency Audit is where we look at the gap between the success you've built on the outside and what you're actually feeling on the inside. We'll identify the exact patterns keeping you stuck in over-functioning, the wounds driving your need to be perfect, and what it's going to take for you to finally create success that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.

    You don't have to choose between your health and your ambition. You don't have to sacrifice sleep, strength, and presence to be successful. But you do have to redefine what high performance actually means.

    Book your free Congruency Audit: lisacarpenter.ca/audit

    Connect with Ciara Foy
    Instagram: @ciarafoyinc 

    Podcast: The Empowered Feminine 

    Book: "Empowered by Food"

    ------------------------------------

    Success that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.

    If you listen on Spotify: 

    Open the Spotify app on your phone.

    Search for Lisa Carpenter and open her podcast page.

    Tap the three dots under the podcast description.

    Choose Rate show from the menu.

    Select your star rating and tap Submit.
  • Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

    Why Over-Functioning Is Keeping You Exhausted (And How to Stop Carrying What Isn't Yours) with Ichel Francis

    14/1/2026 | 56 mins.
    Why do I feel responsible for everything and everyone?
    You're successful. You've built something impressive. But you're also exhausted, overcommitted, and quietly resentful of all the responsibility you carry. On the outside, you look like you have it all together. On the inside, you're running on fumes and wondering how much longer you can keep this up.

    You tell yourself this is just who you are. The responsible one. The dependable one. The one everyone turns to. But what if the weight you're carrying isn't actually yours? What if you've been taking on everyone else's problems, emotions, and responsibilities because you never learned to discern what's truly yours to hold?

    Who is Ichel Francis?
    Ichel Francis is a master coach and founder of The Moon Circle Movement who blends spiritual depth with business strategy in a way that's both grounded and transformative. She works through private coaching, in-person intensives, retreats, and masterminds with visionary leaders and business owners who refuse to choose between inner work and outer results. Ichel runs two successful businesses and has spent years unraveling the patterns of over-functioning, perfectionism, and unworthiness that kept her exhausted despite her success.

    Ichel's Story: When Success Costs Everything
    Ichel grew up in a home where her father chased material success after growing up poor, while her mother carried religious beliefs that wealth made you a bad person. Her mother worked herself to the bone, never allowing herself to enjoy what they'd built, always waiting to be worthy of receiving.

    When her mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer, she had less than eight weeks to live. In those final weeks, she finally bought herself a designer purse, something she'd always wanted but never allowed herself to have. That purse sat beside her at home as she got sicker. She never used it. She'd spent her entire life waiting to be worthy, and by the time she gave herself permission, there was no time left.

    That loss shattered every illusion Ichel had about working hard now to enjoy life later. It became the catalyst for completely redefining what success meant. Not material achievement. Not relentless productivity. But space, expansion, and freedom. The ability to enjoy what you're building now, not someday when you've finally done enough to deserve it.

    For years after, Ichel still found herself running the same patterns. Over-functioning. Taking on everyone else's problems. Using "I don't have the bandwidth for this right now" as a get-out-of-jail-free card to avoid discomfort. Until she finally called herself out and asked: when will you have the bandwidth? At what point will you know you have enough? And she realized the answer was never, unless she chose differently.

    What we talk about in this episode:

    The real cost of over-functioning and why it's keeping you exhausted. Ichel breaks down how taking on everyone else's responsibilities teaches them to under-function, creating the exact dynamic you resent. When you're constantly trying to fix everyone and carry it all, you're not being helpful, you're avoiding the discomfort of letting others struggle through their own lessons.

    How to discern what's actually your responsibility versus what you've taken on. Most women were taught that things that weren't their responsibility needed to be their responsibility. This pattern gets passed down generation to generation. Ichel shares how to start asking: is this even mine? And what happens when you gently place it back down and back out of the room.

    The difference between surrender and avoidance (and why most high achievers confuse the two). If you're someone who runs toward pleasure and away from discomfort, you might think you're surrendering when you're actually just avoiding. Ichel explains how real surrender is sitting in the discomfort, not bouncing back to your comfortable set point, and why that's where the real growth happens.

    Why "I don't have the bandwidth" became her favorite excuse to avoid responsibility. For over a year, Ichel used this phrase to get out of everything she didn't want to deal with. Problems in her relationship, issues with her kids, finances, business challenges. Until she had to ask herself: when will you have the bandwidth? The answer forced her to stop running and start sitting with what she'd been avoiding.

    How to integrate intuition with structure when you're a logical, systems-oriented achiever. You don't have to choose between being strategic and being intuitive. Ichel is an INTJ who loves systems, processes, and predictability, and she's deeply intuitive. She shares how to mix creativity with structure, and why that combination creates a different level of success that most people never access.

    The practice of building self-trust when you've spent years ignoring your intuition. Self-trust isn't built by making big decisions with your gut. It starts with: which shirt jumps out at you when you open your closet? What does your body actually want to eat today? Does your body want rest or does it want to move? Start there. Don't start with "should I move to a new country" intuition. Start with the shirt.

    Why rigidity in any system (including lunar cycles, routines, or business strategies) will eventually blow up in your face. The universe has the last laugh when you try to control everything. Ichel thought she had life figured out with her five-year goals, ten-year plans, pristine house, perfect eating, and daily workouts. Then her mother's diagnosis blindsided her and she learned there is no control. Change is always happening. The question is: what kind of change do you want to invite?

    What it means to be congruent and why it's about being yourself everywhere, not code-switching based on who's in the room. For years, Ichel was a chameleon. Corporate version. Home version. Friends version. Exhausting. Until one day she decided: I'm just going to be me everywhere. If it bothers people, I can't do this anymore. Being congruent means not apologizing for who you are and not making yourself small so others feel comfortable.

    How to know when something is "enough" when you've spent years believing you have to do more to be more. Ichel's accountant asked her out of nowhere: how much money does one person actually need? She'd never asked herself the question. Most high achievers are chasing the end of a rainbow, always moving the target. Unless you define what enough looks like, you'll never feel successful no matter what you accomplish.

    The one truth about success Ichel wishes she'd trusted sooner: her version doesn't have to look like anyone else's. She spent years living someone else's life, the version she thought would make people proud or prove she was okay. It led to misery. Now she knows: you get to define what success looks like. And you get to change it. The plan is to deviate. That's the beauty of it.

    This episode is for you if you've ever:

    Felt responsible for fixing everyone and everything around you while quietly resenting it

    Told yourself "I don't have the bandwidth" to avoid dealing with hard things

    Worked yourself to exhaustion trying to prove you're worthy of what you've built

    Felt guilty for wanting material success or nice things for yourself

    Snapped at loved ones after long days of taking care of everyone else, then felt terrible about it

    Said yes to things you don't want to do because it's easier than disappointing people

    Thought you needed more credentials, more validation, or more help before you could really go for it

    Collapsed into bed exhausted but your mind won't stop racing about everything you're carrying

    Wondered "is this all there is?" even though you've accomplished so much

    Known you need to take better care of yourself but always run out of time and energy

    Built a life that looks successful on the outside but feels exhausting on the inside

    Been waiting to feel worthy enough to finally enjoy what you've created

    How to stop over-functioning and start trusting yourself again
    If you recognized yourself in Ichel's story, you're not alone. So many ambitious, capable women are drowning in responsibility they think is theirs, exhausting themselves trying to fix everyone, and quietly wondering when they'll finally get to rest.

    The truth is, you're not going to rest by doing more. You're not going to feel successful by accomplishing more. And you're not going to feel worthy by working harder to prove your value.

    You'll feel it when you finally stop carrying what isn't yours. When you discern between what's actually your responsibility and what you've taken on because you think being helpful means saving everyone. When you stop trying to eat for other people and let them feed themselves.

    Ready to stop carrying everyone else's weight?
    The Congruency Audit is where we look at the gap between the success you've built on the outside and what you're actually feeling on the inside. We'll identify the exact patterns keeping you stuck in over-functioning, the wounds driving your need to fix and control everything, and what it's going to take for you to finally create success that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.

    This isn't about doing more. It's about putting down what was never yours to carry in the first place.

    Book your free Congruency Audit: lisacarpenter.ca/audit

    Connect with Ichel Francis
    Website: ichelfrancis.com
    Instagram: @ichelfrancis
    Podcast: The Aligned Alchemy Podcast
  • Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

    Looking Back with Honesty: A New Way to Approach the New Year

    07/1/2026 | 40 mins.
    Why do high achievers start every year the same way - with bigger goals, higher standards, and more discipline - only to feel just as exhausted by February?
    Because you've been taught that change happens when the calendar flips. That success requires fixing what didn't work and finally getting it right. But here's what no one's telling you: real change doesn't start with another goal. It starts with an honest look at where you actually are.

    What This Episode Is About
    Most of us enter the New Year already thinking about what we should be doing differently. What needs to be fixed. What standards need to be higher. But this episode isn't about making you better. It's about walking you into a more honest relationship with yourself so you can actually create change that lasts.

    In this solo episode, I'm sharing how I approach the New Year with my clients, and it's the opposite of what you've been taught. We're looking back first, mining for data about what actually worked and what didn't, before we ever look forward. Because clarity creates better choices. And when you know better, you can do better.

    Lisa's Story: From Reckoning to Ownership
    I share my own journey through the past few years - 2023 as a year of reckoning that took me to my knees, 2024 as reclamation and navigating grief I'd never experienced before, and 2025 as recalibration. I talk openly about healing old abandonment wounds, rebuilding my business while stepping back to take care of myself, and what it's looked like to get back in the driver's seat.

    I also share my pattern of waiting for people to choose me instead of creating my own opportunities, and why my word for 2026 is "ownership." This isn't about perfection. It's about recognizing where I've been overriding my intuition and what needs to shift for me to step fully into the authority I've been building for over two decades.

    What we talk about in this episode:

    Why you don't need another goal, you need a more honest relationship with yourself. Most high achievers have been sold the myth that if you tick all the boxes, you'll finally feel the way you think you should feel. But achieving more things won't make you feel better about yourself if you don't feel better about yourself now. This episode walks you through reflection questions that create the clarity needed for real change.

    The questions that create pattern recognition about 2025. Where did you show up for yourself in ways you're proud of? Where did effort not equal fulfillment? What patterns continued despite your best intentions? What are you done tolerating? These aren't questions to complete, they're meant to disrupt and bring things to the surface.

    Why high achievers struggle to ask for help (and how it shows up differently in business vs. personal life). I share my own pattern of being great at asking for help personally but struggling professionally because I don't want friends to feel like I'm taking advantage of our relationship. This over-functioning pattern keeps many of us isolated and exhausted.

    What deserves acknowledgement that no one else saw. The private victories matter just as much as the public ones. The things you navigated that nobody on the outside saw. The ways you showed up for yourself when it would have been easier not to. These are the data points that reveal who you're becoming.

    Less resolutions, more reverence for the life you want to lead. Instead of asking "what do I need to fix," we're asking "what do I want more of?" What feels non-negotiable for your energy? Where have you been overriding your intuition? What would need to shift internally for you to feel successful in 2026 if nothing changed externally?

    How to redefine success so it's about how you feel, not what you achieve. Success is not a destination. It's a feeling you can choose to step into. I share how my definition of success has completely shifted from 2019 to now, and why it took me so long to realize that no amount of external achievement would make me feel the way I wanted to feel until I decided to choose to feel that way.

    The identity shift that comes before the outcome. Your identity - who you're being in the world, how you're showing up - comes before the results. If you want a different outcome in 2026, you have to become the person who has that outcome. I share my own identity shifts around money, numbers, and being smart that allowed my business revenue to expand.

    The future-pacing exercise that makes 2026 inevitable. Imagine it's the end of 2026. What would need to happen for you to look back and feel proud? What behaviors would you honor? What beliefs would you leave behind? What were you committed to that made the outcome inevitable? This isn't about perfection, it's about commitment.

    Why "ownership" and "fun" are my words for 2026. I share my practice of choosing a word or energy for the year (not a resolution), and why after years of being "intentional," I'm stepping into ownership. No more waiting for people to choose me or for opportunities to come to me. This is the year of creating my own stages and moving past fear.

    This episode is for you if you've ever:

    Started the New Year with big goals and strong discipline only to feel exhausted by February

    Achieved everything you thought you wanted but still don't feel the way you thought you would

    Found yourself spinning more plates than ever despite saying you'd do less

    Been everyone's rock while quietly crumbling on the inside

    Struggled to ask for help because you don't want to burden people or take advantage of relationships

    Overridden your intuition and talked yourself out of things you knew were right

    Wondered "is this all there is?" or "how much longer can I keep this up?"

    Defined success by external metrics (titles, money, achievements) but feel empty inside

    Known you should prioritize yourself but always run out of time and energy

    Waited for permission or for someone to choose you instead of creating your own opportunities

    Tolerated things in 2025 that you're absolutely done tolerating in 2026

    Built a life that looks good on the outside but doesn't feel congruent on the inside

    How to Actually Create Change in 2026 (Without Another Resolution)
    Here's what most high achievers don't understand about the New Year: nothing changes when the calendar flips. You don't become a different person on January 1st. Real change starts with reflection, not resolution.

    If you're already thinking about what you should be doing differently in 2026, pause. Because the truth is, most of you don't need another goal. You need a more honest relationship with yourself. You need to look back at 2025 with curiosity instead of judgment, and mine for the data about what actually worked and what didn't.

    This episode walks you through powerful reflection questions designed to create clarity. Clarity creates better choices. When you know what patterns continued despite your best intentions, where your effort didn't equal fulfillment, and what you're done tolerating, you can actually make different decisions moving forward.

    The cost of skipping this reflection? Another year of chasing goals that don't align with who you actually are. Another year of achieving things that don't make you feel the way you thought they would. Another year of exhaustion without fulfillment.

    Ready to Stop Chasing Goals That Don't Actually Fill You Up?
    If you listened to this episode and recognized yourself in these patterns - the over-functioning, the waiting for permission, the achieving without feeling, the overriding your intuition - it's time for a reset.

    The Congruency Audit is where we look at the gap between the success you've built on the outside and what you're actually feeling on the inside. We'll identify the exact patterns keeping you stuck in cycles of exhaustion and achievement without fulfillment, the identity beliefs driving your behavior, and what it's going to take for you to finally create success that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.

    This isn't about adding another goal to your list. It's about getting honest about what's true for you and starting to live from that truth. Because when you're congruent, success stops being something you chase and becomes who you are.

    Book your free Congruency Audit: lisacarpenter.ca/audit

    Connect with Lisa

    Website: lisacarpenter.ca

    Podcast: lisacarpenter.ca/podcast

    Instagram: @lisacarpenterinc

    LinkedIn: Lisa Carpenter

    Walk the Camino with Lisa in September 2026
    If you're feeling called to more in-person connection and real transformation, join Lisa and Sara Intonato in Spain for a walking retreat on the Camino de Santiago, September 25 - October 3, 2026.

    This isn't a vacation. It's a sacred journey to leave behind what's weighing you down and reconnect with yourself without the noise of the rest of the world. Walk over 100 kilometers, strip away the layers that aren't yours, and step into who you're becoming.

    Limited spaces available. Payment plans available now. Learn more: HERE

    This isn't about optimizing the version of yourself you built to survive. It's about creating congruence so the life you've built doesn't just look good, it finally feels right.

     

    If you listen on Spotify: 

    Open the Spotify app on your phone.

    Search for Lisa Carpenter and open her podcast page.

    Tap the three dots under the podcast description.

    Choose Rate show from the menu.

    Select your star rating and tap Submit.
  • Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

    5 Episodes to Help You Stop Feeling Exhausted Despite Your Success Year-End Reflection 2025

    30/12/2025 | 12 mins.
    Why do successful people feel so exhausted? You've built something that matters. You've proven yourself over and over. But no matter how much you achieve, it never feels like enough. You're running on fumes, your mind won't stop racing, and you're quietly wondering how much longer you can keep this up. If that sounds familiar, this episode is your roadmap into 2026.

    This is the final episode of 2025, and instead of a typical conversation, Lisa Carpenter reflects on the year of transition that brought Full Frontal Living into its new identity: Congruent. She shares her gratitude for 338 episodes, the evolution of her work, and what's ahead in 2026. But more importantly, she's curated five of the most powerful episodes from this year to help you close out 2025 and step into the new year differently.

    These aren't just "best of" picks. They're the episodes that hit hardest for ambitious, Type A professionals, executives, and entrepreneurs who are tired of success that feels hollow. The ones who are overcommitted, overwhelmed, and ready to stop abandoning themselves in the name of achievement.

    Lisa's Year-End Reflection: From Full Frontal Living to Congruent
    This year marked a massive shift. When Lisa rebranded to Congruent, it wasn't just about a new name. It was about getting specific on who she's really here to serve: the high-achieving leaders who look like they have it all together on the outside but are crumbling on the inside. The ones who are exhausted but can't stop. The ones who snap at their loved ones, numb with food or wine, and collapse into bed too tired to sleep but too wired to rest.

    The rebrand was about naming the gap between external success and internal fulfillment, and creating a space where ambitious people can finally get honest about what success is actually costing them. Because you can't create peace while choosing chaos. You can't build connection while abandoning yourself to keep it.

     
    The 5 Episodes Lisa Wants You to Revisit (Or Discover) for 2026
    Episode 322: The 3 Biggest Mistakes People Make Trying to Protect Their Energy
    Most people think they're protecting their energy when they're actually just avoiding the real work. This episode reveals what's actually draining you and why your current strategy of saying no to everything isn't solving the problem. You'll learn the difference between energy protection and energy reclamation, and why boundaries without self-awareness just create new problems.

    Listen if: You're exhausted despite "setting boundaries," saying no feels impossible, or you're constantly running on fumes no matter how much you delegate.

    Episode 310: Why You Might Be Addicted to Achievement (And How to Let Peace In Without Slowing Down)
    This episode is for everyone terrified that slowing down means giving up. Lisa breaks down the difference between healthy ambition and achievement addiction, why "never enough" keeps you stuck, and how to let peace in without losing your drive. Because rest isn't the opposite of ambition. It's what makes sustainable success possible.

    Listen if: You're constantly moving goalposts, can't celebrate wins, feel guilty resting, or believe your worth is tied to your productivity.

    Episode 282: How to Love and Accept Your Body While Still Wanting to Change It
    Hating yourself into transformation doesn't work. This episode teaches you how to hold both compassion for where you are and desire for change at the same time. Lisa walks you through the both/and of body acceptance, why shame keeps you stuck, and how self-compassion is actually the fastest path to sustainable change.

    Listen if: You've been at war with your body, feel guilty wanting to change, or can't figure out how to be kind to yourself while still having goals.

    Episode 280: The Top Reasons You Fail to Achieve Your Goals
    This isn't another goal-setting framework. This episode exposes the hidden patterns sabotaging you before you even start. Lisa reveals why knowing better doesn't translate to doing better, the role of nervous system regulation in follow-through, and what actually needs to shift for you to stop self-sabotaging.

    Listen if: You set goals but never follow through, know what to do but can't seem to do it, or feel like you're constantly starting over.

    Episode 248: The Key to Freedom: Using Your Power of Choice in Everyday Life
    Freedom isn't something that happens when you finally achieve enough. It's available to you right now. This episode breaks down how to reclaim your power of choice in everyday moments, why you keep giving your power away, and what it takes to start living from agency instead of obligation.

    Listen if: You feel trapped by your circumstances, say yes when you mean no, or constantly feel like you "have to" instead of "choose to."

     
    Today's Episode Is For You If You've Ever:

    Felt successful on the outside while quietly crumbling on the inside. Everyone thinks you have it all together, but you're exhausted, resentful, and wondering if this is all there is.

    Cried in the car after a big win because it didn't feel like success. You achieved the thing, but instead of celebration, you immediately moved the goalpost and criticized yourself for not doing better.

    Snapped at loved ones after long days, then felt guilty for not being present. You're so drained by the time you get home that you have nothing left for the people who matter most.

    Found yourself numbing with food, wine, or scrolling late at night. Because slowing down feels uncomfortable, and you'd rather not feel what's underneath.

    Collapsed into bed exhausted but your mind won't stop racing. Your body is done, but your brain is still running through everything you didn't finish and everything waiting for you tomorrow.

    Said yes to things you don't want to do because it feels easier than saying no. The guilt of disappointing someone else feels worse than abandoning yourself.

    Wondered "is this all there is?" or "how much longer can I keep this up?" You built the life everyone admires, but inside, it doesn't feel congruent.

    Known you should take better care of yourself but always run out of time and energy. You know better, but you can't seem to do better, and that gap is eating you alive.

    Built a life people admire but inside it doesn't feel congruent. The success looks good, but it doesn't feel good, and you're terrified to admit that out loud.

     
    How to Stop Feeling Exhausted Despite Your Success
    Here's what most people get wrong: they think the answer is more rest, better boundaries, or finally achieving the next big thing. But exhaustion isn't just a time management problem. It's a nervous system problem. It's an identity problem. It's a "you're living out of alignment with who you actually are" problem.

    You can't think your way into feeling fulfilled. You can't goal-set your way out of burnout. And you sure as hell can't keep doing the same thing and expect different results.

    What you need is to get honest about the patterns running underneath everything. The ones keeping you overcommitted, overwhelmed, and wondering how much longer you can keep this up. The ones that make success feel hollow no matter what you achieve.

    That's what these five episodes will help you see. Not surface-level tips. Not productivity hacks. The actual context, the underlying operating system, that's been running your life without your permission.

    Because when you shift the context, the content takes care of itself.

     
    Join Lisa on the Camino de Santiago in September 2026
    Lisa has walked the Camino de Santiago twice, and in September 2026, she's doing something different. She's facilitating a group pilgrimage experience, co-hosting with her best friend Sara Intonato (who was featured on last week's episode).

    This isn't just a trip. It's a pilgrimage. Lisa is walking the same route that was such a massive part of her personal healing and growth journey in 2024. The route that cracked her open in all the right ways. The route that showed her what was possible when she got out of her own way. The route that showed her what she was holding onto, the pain she was attached to, and how to start to let it go so she could create the beautiful life she's living today.

    Now Lisa and Sara are bringing a group with them to have their own transformative experience.

    What you need to know about the Camino: The lessons you're meant to learn and the experiences you're meant to have will find you. You can't force them. You can't plan for them. But when you show up willing to be in relationship with yourself, when you create the space to actually listen, everything shifts.

    This is a chance to be in deep relationship with yourself while also being supported with powerful coaching to help you pull out the lessons and embody them in ways you haven't been able to access before. Because awareness without integration changes nothing. And this pilgrimage is designed to help you do both.

    If extraordinary experiences and personal growth are your goals for 2026, this is the perfect opportunity.Registration is open now. 

     

    Ready to Stop Running on Fumes and Start Leading Yourself Powerfully?
    If you're sitting here thinking, "I want my 2026 to be different. I'm done feeling like this," listen closely.

    You can't think your way into a different life. You can't goal-set your way into feeling fulfilled. And you sure as hell can't keep doing the same thing and expect different results.

    What you need is to get honest about the patterns running underneath everything. The ones keeping you exhausted, overcommitted, and wondering how much longer you can keep this up. The ones that make success feel hollow no matter what you achieve.

    That's what the Congruency Audit is for. It's a free 15-minute call where we look at the gap between the success you've built on the outside and what you're actually feeling on the inside. We identify the exact pattern keeping you stuck, the cost of staying where you are, and what it's going to take for you to finally create success that feels as good as it looks.

    Here's what you need to know: Lisa only has a few 1:1 coaching spots available for 2026. And every single one of her clients starts with this call. Not because she needs to sell you, but because you need to see what's actually possible when you stop running from yourself and start leading yourself powerfully.

    Imagine this: Walking into 2026 with the emotional capacity to handle anything. The self-trust to make decisions that align with who you actually are, not who you think you should be. The ability to set boundaries without guilt, say no without over-explaining, and finally stop abandoning yourself to keep everyone else comfortable.

    That's what powerful self-leadership looks like. And it's available to you right now.

    But only if you're ready to stop waiting for permission and start choosing yourself.

    Book your Congruency Audit now: lisacarpenter.ca/audit

    Because 2026 is going to come whether you're ready or not. The only question is, are you going to spend another year feeling like this, or are you finally going to do something about it?

    Connect with Lisa

    Website: lisacarpenter.ca

    Congruency Audit: lisacarpenter.ca/audit

    Camino Pilgrimage (September 2026): Camino Invitation and Deposit Link

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisacarpenterinc/

    LinkedIn: https://ca.linkedin.com/in/lisacarpenterinc

    This isn't about optimizing the version of yourself you built to survive. It's about creating congruence so the life you've built doesn't just look good, it finally feels right.

     

    If you listen on Spotify: 

    Open the Spotify app on your phone.

    Search for Lisa Carpenter and open her podcast page.

    Tap the three dots under the podcast description.

    Choose Rate show from the menu.

    Select your star rating and tap Submit.
  • Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

    How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed this Holiday Season: Simple Nervous System Tools that Actually Work with Sara Intonato

    23/12/2025 | 40 mins.
    Why do successful people feel the most overwhelmed during the holidays? You've built something impressive, you're capable of managing complex projects and leading teams, yet the moment the holidays arrive, you're barely hanging on. You're over-functioning for everyone else, saying yes when you mean no, and by the time you collapse into bed, your mind won't stop racing about everything you still need to do tomorrow.

    Who is Sara Intonato?
    Sara Intonato is the founder of Autism Changemakers, a parent coach, consultant, and bestselling author. She's also been a yoga teacher and nervous system practitioner for over 20 years. Her work is rooted in ancient, time-tested practices from her 11 trips to India to study Ashtanga yoga, supporting parents of nonspeaking autistic children to regulate their nervous systems in high-stakes moments where safety is a concern and regulation isn't optional.

    Sara's Story: Why Ancient Practices Matter in Our Instant Gratification World
    Sara took her first trip to India in her early 20s thinking she'd have a beautiful spiritual experience and get it out of her system. Instead, she discovered that to truly master something, there's no shortcut. You can't buy a certificate or complete a weekend training. You have to show up day after day, year after year, and let the practice change you.

    What makes Sara different from the trendy breathwork facilitators flooding the coaching space is her commitment to teaching these practices properly. In India, she learned that advanced breathwork practices were withheld from students until they had a strong foundation because introducing them too soon would be "crazy making." They would move energy around so profoundly that students wouldn't be able to manage it.

    This is exactly what Sara sees happening now in mainstream wellness culture. Coaches are throwing breathwork into their programs after minimal training, parents and professionals are trying to release trauma without knowing how to regulate what comes up, and people are more dysregulated than ever. Sara brings these ancient tools to her clients and students in bite-sized pieces that are safe and effective for all levels, because who needs more chaos in their life right now?

    What we talk about in this episode:

    Why the holidays trigger grief and overwhelm for high achievers. It's not just about being busy. The holidays stir up emotions that feel inconvenient, whether it's comparing your reality to what you thought life would look like, dealing with family dynamics that activate old wounds, or simply the pressure to make everything magical while you're running on fumes. This episode normalizes that you can feel successful and still struggle during this season.

    The one-minute breathing practice that will ground you anywhere, anytime. Equal breathing through the nose (four counts in, four counts out) for just one minute is enough to shift your nervous system from reactive to regulated. No special equipment, no mantras, no perfect conditions required. Sara explains exactly how to do this practice and why engaging your throat slightly (like you're gargling) activates your vagus nerve and creates deeper regulation.

    Why you can't help anyone when you're dysregulated. Sara works with parents managing aggressive behaviors and safety concerns with their children. The homework is always the same: regulate yourself first. When you're dysregulated, you escalate everyone around you. When you ground yourself, you create space for co-regulation. This applies whether you're parenting, leading a team, or trying to survive Christmas dinner with your in-laws.

    The ice cube trick that interrupts spiraling thoughts instantly. When you can't escape the room or take a minute to breathe, grab some ice cubes. Hold them for one minute. The intense sensation forces you into presence because you literally can't think about anything else. It's a pattern interrupt that brings you back to your body so you can respond instead of react.

    How to train your mind to concentrate using Zen Buddhist meditation. Set a timer for five minutes and count each breath (inhale one, exhale two, up to ten, then start over). Every time your mind wanders to Aunt Patty's comment or your to-do list, go back to one and start again. Don't be surprised if you don't get past two. This isn't about perfection, it's about observing where your mind goes without judgment and teaching it to concentrate on one thing: your breath.

    Why reactivity is destroying our ability to make good decisions. We live in an Amazon Prime culture where everything is instant. But this reactivity is getting in the way of our functioning. We think every thought and feeling requires immediate action. This practice teaches your nervous system that it's okay to sit with discomfort, to not scratch the itchy nose, to let your foot fall asleep during meditation. Everything will pass. You won't die from waiting.

    The real reason you can't feel holiday magic (and it's not the circumstances). Holiday magic is just presence. That's it. But how can you possibly enjoy being here now when your mind is in five different places? Sara shares how she creates magic by putting on Christmas music, baking, and allowing herself to just be in the moment because life will be plenty busy in January. The magic isn't external fairy dust, it's choosing to be present.

    What your kids will actually remember about this season. It's not how many vegetables they ate or how organized the gift wrapping was. They'll remember how you felt. Your energy is what people experience from you. If you're emanating stress and overwhelm, that's what everyone will carry from their interactions with you. The quality of your life, your relationships, your work changes drastically when you take the time to regulate yourself.

    This episode is for you if you've ever:

    Felt like you're barely hanging on through the holidays, one comment away from snapping

    Snapped at your kids or partner after a long day, then felt guilty for not being present

    Numbed with food, wine, or scrolling because slowing down feels uncomfortable

    Thought "I don't have time for mindfulness or nervous system practices"

    Believed meditation and breathwork are too complicated or not for people like you

    Been the strong one everyone leans on while you're quietly crumbling inside

    Said yes to holiday commitments when you meant no because it feels easier

    Collapsed into bed exhausted but your mind won't stop racing about tomorrow

    Wondered "how much longer can I keep this up?"

    Known you should take better care of yourself but always run out of time and energy

    Built a life people admire but feel like you're missing the magic everyone else seems to experience

    Felt reactive and stressed, robbing yourself and your family of presence and connection

    How to Stop Being Reactive and Start Being Present
    Here's what most people miss about nervous system regulation: they think it requires complicated practices, special training, or hours of time they don't have. So they do nothing. They stay in reactivity, they over-function for everyone else, and they wonder why the holidays feel so overwhelming instead of magical.

    But Sara's work proves that regulation doesn't require perfection or massive time investments. It requires one minute. Four counts in, four counts out. Ice cubes in your hands when you can't escape the room. Counting your breath when your mind is spinning.

    The cost of staying dysregulated isn't just that you feel stressed. It's that your children remember mom as a ball of stress. Your colleagues remember your overwhelm, not your competence. Your partner experiences your reactivity, not your love. You rob yourself of the presence and connection you're craving because you think you don't have time to regulate.

    Ready to stop feeling overwhelmed and start feeling present?
    If you're reading this and recognizing yourself, if you've been running on fumes for so long that you don't even remember what regulated feels like, it's time to stop.

    The Congruency Audit is where we look at the gap between the success you've built on the outside and what you're actually feeling on the inside. We'll identify the exact patterns keeping you stuck in over-functioning and reactivity, the wounds driving your need to be strong for everyone else, and what it's going to take for you to finally create success that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.

    This isn't about adding more to your plate. It's about understanding why you keep saying yes when you mean no, why you can't give yourself permission to rest, and what needs to shift so you can finally stop running and start being present.

    How To Thrive Through The Silly Season Workbook: https://lisacarpenter.ca/holidays/

    Book your free Congruency Audit: lisacarpenter.ca/audit

    And if you know you need more than a 15-minute call, if you're craving a complete reset where you can step away from the noise and actually remember who you are beneath all the doing, Sara and I are taking a small group on a walking pilgrimage along the Camino in Spain in September 2026.  Learn more HERE

    This isn't a vacation. It's a sacred reset. Six days walking more than 100 kilometers with daily coaching, integration circles, yoga, breathwork, and deep conversations that help you release what's been weighing you down. Spaces are intentionally limited to ensure intimacy and depth of support. When it fills, it closes. Learn more at lisacarpenter.ca.

    Connect with Sara Intonato:
    Website: https://www.saraintonato.com/

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sara.intonato/

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sara-intonato-23036b172

     

    If you listen on Spotify: 

    Open the Spotify app on your phone.

    Search for Lisa Carpenter and open her podcast page.

    Tap the three dots under the podcast description.

    Choose Rate show from the menu.

    Select your star rating and tap Submit.

    This isn't about optimizing the version of yourself you built to survive. It's about creating congruence so the life you've built doesn't just look good, it finally feels right.

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About Congruent with Lisa Carpenter | The truth beneath success. Why it never feels like enough.

You’ve built success that looks impressive on the outside, but inside, it never feels like enough. Congruent is the podcast for ambitious professionals and A-type high achievers who are tired of burning out, pushing harder, and still wondering why success doesn’t feel fulfilling. Hosted by Master Coach Lisa Carpenter, Congruent goes beyond highlight reels and exposes the truth beneath success. With 20+ years of experience and a track record that includes thousands of coaching hours and hundreds of podcast episodes, Lisa brings the authority, depth, and honesty that ambitious leaders crave but rarely hear. Each week you’ll hear raw interviews, live coaching conversations, and bold insights designed to help you reclaim your energy, strengthen your emotional wellbeing, redefine achievement, and step into powerful self-leadership. If you’re ready for success that finally feels as good as it looks, this is your wake-up call. 👉 Subscribe now so you never miss an episode.
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