Blended

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions around coercive and post separation abuse.

In this episode of Blended, Kate is joined by Nathalie and special guest co-host Legally Nik, family and child protection lawyer, who is back to help the panel unpack some of your most complex legal dilemmas.

The episode begins by revisiting the conversation from a few weeks ago with @Jessrunsforsurvivors, diving deeper into narcissistic ex-partners and coercive control. Nik explains that coercive control is illegal but incredibly difficult to prove. She breaks down what it looks like in court, how the legal system approaches it, and shares practical advice on communication tools such as yellow rocking and creating safer boundaries.

The second dilemma focuses on frustrations with the Child Maintenance Service. A listener feels it is unfair that when starting a new family, payments are only reduced by a small percentage. Nik explains why the system works as it does, why nobody is ever completely happy with it and why the law ultimately prioritises the child above all else.

The final dilemma is from a mum who wants to take her child on holiday but is being told she needs the father’s permission because they have different surnames. Nik clarifies the legal position, explaining that surnames are irrelevant and consent is still required where parental responsibility is shared.

As always, Kate and Nathalie ask the questions many blended families are thinking and Nik provides the legal clarity behind the emotions.

For more support contact Legally Nik
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In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla, who shares an update on a family situation she previously opened up about and how she handled a recent interaction with that family member.

They tackle a tricky dilemma, a woman who separated from her husband admits she never felt fully accepted by her stepchildren. She showed up, she tried, but she remembers distance and rejection. Now, years later, her ex stepson has invited her to his wedding, describing her as a big part of his life. She is shocked. She does not remember it that way. She is asking whether she is obligated to go, and whether she needs to honour his version of the past when her experience felt so different.

Kate, Nathalie and Cilla unpack what it means when memories do not match, why children may remember your presence differently than you do, and whether closure has to look like attendance. They explore the right to protect your peace, the power of simply showing up, and how blended relationships can leave lasting impact even when they felt strained at the time.

This episode is about perspective, boundaries and the complicated legacy of step parenting.


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Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions around coercive and post separation abuse.

In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Cilla are joined by Jess, known online as @JessRunsForSurvivors. Jess creates content around co-parenting with someone with narcissistic traits and is a patron for the charity Mums in Need, which supports women facing post separation abuse and coercive control.

Jess shares part of her own story and what life has been like navigating co parenting with someone displaying narcissistic behaviours. She explains the complexity around narcissism as a disorder, why it requires clinical diagnosis, and why obtaining that diagnosis is often difficult.

The panel then tackles two difficult listener dilemmas.

In the first, a stepmum is worried that her stepdaughter’s behaviour dramatically shifts after time spent at her dad’s house. The child returns hostile towards her stepsister and stepdad, repeating phrases that feel planted. The stepmum fears the dynamic is slowly destabilising her home and does not know how to protect her family without escalating the situation.

In the second dilemma, a woman describes how her ex presents as charming and composed publicly, yet attempts to undermine her behind the scenes. He has contacted her workplace claiming concern about her mental health and continues to interfere in subtle but damaging ways.

Kate and Cilla admit they find parts of these stories difficult to comprehend, questioning how anyone copes with this level of manipulation. Jess offers practical tools and strategies including grey rocking, tightening communication, regulating tone, and even using tools like AI to draft neutral responses in high conflict situations.

For more support follow @jessrunsforsurvivors and check out Mums In Need
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Mother’s Day has always meant something special to Blended. Please Note: This episode was recorded on Thursday 26th February, before the recent conflict in the Middle East.
As mums and as a podcast that talks about family life, our hearts are with everyone affected by the devastating events that have unfolded since this recording.

This episode is the first ever remote recording of Blended, Kate recorded from Dubai on while Nathalie and Cilla joined from London.

After putting a question box out to the Blended Instagram, the messages flooded in. One major theme was the pressure around buying gifts for the ex. Several stepmums shared that their partner expects them to organise Mother’s Day cards and presents for the bio mum, sometimes even extravagant ones. The panel discusses boundaries, emotional labour and whether managing that relationship is really the stepmum’s responsibility.

They also tackle the complex dynamic of stepping into a family where the children’s mum has passed away. What happens when you are doing the daily parenting but feel you cannot be publicly celebrated in case it upsets extended family? Kate shares her own experience and how she has navigated that delicate balance.

Alongside the dilemmas, the ladies open up about how they will be spending Mother’s Day themselves and why this date continues to matter so much to the show.
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One stepmum feels ignored in her concerns. Another feels invisible in her relationship.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Nathalie are joined by therapist, bestselling author, TV presenter and podcast host Anna Williamson for an honest conversation about child anxiety and what happens to intimacy when life changes overnight.

Anna speaks openly about her own mental health journey and why it led her to her training as a therapist and write the books she has. Her perspective shapes two powerful listener dilemmas.

In the first, a stepmum believes she can see clear signs of anxiety in her stepdaughter. She notices changes in behaviour, emotional withdrawal and subtle warning signs, but her partner insists she is projecting. Is she overstepping or is she the only adult paying attention? Anna breaks down what anxiety can really look like in children, the role phones and social media may play and how to raise concerns without damaging your relationship.

In the second dilemma, a stepmum admits her relationship has completely changed since the children moved in full time. What used to be spontaneous and passionate now feels interrupted and distant. She jokes that the kids have a spidy sense for knowing exactly when she and her partner are about to get it on. The panel discuss how blended life can quietly erode intimacy, why resentment builds and practical ways to protect your relationship when parenting takes over.

Don’t forget to rate and review, also we love hearing from you so follow @blended on Instagram to share your story.
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