MissPerceived

In this episode, Leah finally pulls back the curtain on a piece of her research she hasn’t fully shared yet: the mental load at work and how it travels both directions between your job and your home. Drawing on her book Drained: How to Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More and prior research with colleagues at the University of Melbourne, she explains why the mental load is not just “to-do lists” or cognitive labor, but invisible, boundaryless, emotional thinking work you carry everywhere you go.
Leah walks through the eight types of mental load and invites you to look at how they show up differently in your work life versus your home life, using insights from her Lighten Lab assessment tool. She highlights what her studies are finding about dads in particular: men are often thinking intensely about safety and “dream building” for the family, trying to show up as better, more emotionally present fathers than their own dads while also compartmentalizing work so it doesn’t bleed into home. The twist? When men feel justified in investing in their own dreams and rest, many women are still running everything behind the scenes—fueling resentment and burnout. This episode gives you language to see your work mental load clearly and to start rebalancing it in your own life.
Follow Leah: @prof.leahruppanner
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Right before launching her book Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More, Leah found a lump in her breast on vacation and was diagnosed with breast cancer. In this deeply personal episode, she shares what it feels like to carry the emotional thinking work of a serious health crisis on top of everyday life: worrying about your child’s future, your career, your dreams, and everyone else’s feelings while trying to process your own.
Follow Leah: @prof.leahruppanner
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Leah says the quiet part out loud: your parents (and older generations) are probably not the people who can help you solve your biggest life problems right now. Drawing on themes from Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More, she unpacks why the world you’re managing—pandemics, political instability, climate anxiety, precarious work, AI, and always-on social media—is fundamentally different from the one they came of age in.
She explores what happens when you go looking “up” or “down” generations for support and end up with blame, outdated advice, or total misunderstanding instead of comfort. Leah talks about the mental load of carrying your own crises and doing relationship repair across generations, and offers a compassionate reframe: stop asking people to understand a world they don’t live in, and start finding the people who can actually see you, support you, and tell you what you most need to hear—you’re doing a great job.
Follow Leah: @prof.leahruppanner
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today, Professor Leah pulls back the curtain on a sneaky problem hiding inside your already overloaded brain: duplicated mental load. Drawing on her new book Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More, she explains why mental load is emotional thinking work, how it stretches across eight types and seven stages, and why so much of it is being quietly double- (or triple-) handled in our homes and relationships.
Leah shares a story about how one unpredictable morning (RIP Spuds) blew up her carefully planned day, then uses it to show why mental load is more like a limited bank account than an endless resource. You’ll learn how to spot where you and others are all worrying about the same tasks, when that duplication actually helps, and when it’s just burning you out. If you’re waking up exhausted, constantly planning for everyone, and wondering why you never feel “finished,” this conversation will help you see your mental load clearly and give you a simple first step: find the duplication, and drop what isn’t yours to carry.
Follow Leah: @prof.leahruppanner
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If every conversation about housework, childcare, careers, and the mental load seems to end in frustration, resentment, or a full-blown fight, this episode is for you. Leah breaks down why these talks get stuck, how gender norms shape what each partner hears, and why leading with your dreams instead of your overwhelm can change the entire conversation.
Drawing from her research and her upcoming book Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More, Leah shares a practical approach for getting clearer on what you want, what support you need, and who is actually best equipped to help you get there. She also explains why both partners may be telling the truth about their fears, even when they feel like they’re speaking completely different languages.
This episode offers a powerful shift: instead of asking, “Why aren’t you doing what I’m doing?”, ask, “How do we support each other’s goals as a family?” Leah’s advice is equal parts honest, compassionate, and actionable, with a focus on reducing conflict, sharing the load more fairly, and building a relationship that makes room for both people’s ambitions.
Follow Leah: @prof.leahruppanner
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.