The Edge Breakfast

We let Dan step into the simulation tank to create his absolute perfect life, and let’s just say things went off the rails fast. Between his new name "Taint Tilman," a very specific age-defying pact, and a band name that had the censors sweating, it’s a total chaotic spiral. You are not ready for where this dream life ends up—especially the "snake vs. cockroach" tattoo.
0:00 – Meg’s accidental F-bomb and the $50k fuel wheel chaos.

1:45 – Entering the tank: Dan’s rules for his simulated reality.

2:30 – The Celine Dion power couple and the aging-slowly hack.

3:45 – The band name disaster: From "Killer Cats" to "Lick Rich Kids."

5:10 – Meet Taint Tilman: Dan’s new simulated identity.

6:25 – The tattoo: A snake, a giant cockroach, and a lot of regret.

7:40 – Life on the cliff: Why there’s no rain and everyone walks on their hands.

Clint, Meg and Dan kick off with a chat about life expectancy, then debate throwback music before playing Michael Jackson and promoting the upcoming biopic “Michael.” They give away movie tickets, discuss slow biopics, and share a coffee catch-up about cheap library book buys, clutter, and too many display pillows. Small Town News confirms Paeroa’s iconic L&P bottle has changed to a more recyclable clear design. The Fuel Wheel finally lands on Mazda, winning Kristelle $5,000 in fuel; she declines the risky re-spin for $50,000, while an 8am spin narrowly misses. The show covers Coachella costs and profits, reads a grumpy Dan’s Diary entry about a Rangitoto trip, shares listeners’ worst school trips, plays the A-list game, and pitches a “long-distance best friend island” trip concept.

00:00 Morning Welcome Banter
01:55 Throwback Song Showdown
04:54 Michael Biopic
06:52 Caller Boston Truck Talk
08:27 Coffee Catch Up Deals
12:37 Scandal
14:34 More Or Less
18:05 Naughty Church Clip
20:26 Small Town News L&P Bottle
24:35 Fuel Wheel Setup Kristelle
25:59 Spin To Win Five Grand!!!
32:42 Coachella Cost Breakdown
36:05 Diary Hunt Setup
36:55 Rangitoto Trip Rant
39:51 Worst School Trips Calls
44:24 Guys Roast Girls Habits
49:49 Fuel Wheel Near Miss
53:46 A Lister List
01:00:35 Cockpit Email Prank
01:02:19 On Air Swear Apology
01:03:00 Best Friend Island Pitch

We’re spiralling today as we weigh up the ultimate choice: would you ditch your mediocre reality to live in a "Think Tank" simulation of your perfect life? Dan’s already sold, but it might be because he’s still reeling from the time he accidentally lied to a 15-year-old on GTA. Plus, Meg gets weirdly specific about her dream body—and her husband's—while Clint prepares to take over the Premier League as "Jackson Pump." You’re not ready for where this one ends up.
00:45 – Dan’s accidental "catfish" story involving a 15-year-old and GTA.


02:30 – The "Think Tank" Dilemma: Real life vs. a perfect simulation.


05:15 – Meg’s dream life: Mystery, painting, and Guy’s "size" adjustment.


08:10 – The "Escargot" nipple debate.


09:45 – Clint’s transformation into "Jackson Pump," the Premier League's biggest star.


12:20 – Why the simulation might be better than actual reality.

Clint, Meg and Dan kick off Monday with 50K Fuellette, giving callers $100 fuel and spinning the wheel for a shot at $5,000 and potentially $50,000, with near-misses landing close to Mitsubishi and then on Tesla. They choose Avicii’s “Wake Me Up” for the 6AM throwback, discuss libraries, markets, and Bay of Plenty overtaking Auckland in per-capita cocaine use. Dan’s Diary reveals teenage antics involving fireworks and “mince envelope.” Meg vents about Guy delaying windscreen wipers and shares a list of pet peeves, while listeners add theirs. The show checks Coachella highlights, crosses to Swedish reporter Sven for a tense Justin Bieber encounter, and revisits Meg’s viral reflections on long-distance friendships and missed milestones before launching “Rumor Has It” investigations.

00:00 Monday Kickoff Banter
01:29 6AM Throwback Debate
04:54 Weekend Recap and Libraries
09:30 Scandal
12:09 Naughty 6:40
21:25 Fuellette
23:59 Best Flatmate Names Game
31:50 Windscreen Wiper Mystery
37:02 One Direction Doc Drama
37:48 Men Habits List
43:52 Coachella Highlights
46:44 Sven LIVE from Coachella
49:16 Fuellette
51:47 Long Distance Besties
01:01:05 Dan Diary Fireworks
01:04:52 Rumor Has It Hotline

We’re spiralling today, mostly because Clint might actually have a problem. Between his questionable "creative" brain and a nose hair situation that involves hot blue wax and a lot of screaming, things got weird fast. We also dive deep into the bedroom habits of New Zealand, and let’s just say, some of us are bringing the national average way up. You aren't ready for the photo Clint thought was a "booby pic"—it’s equal parts hilarious and haunting.
00:45 – The brutal reality of nose waxing.

03:10 – The leg waxing stunt that still haunts Dan’s pores.

04:50 – Clint’s "Sex Addict" intervention begins.

06:15 – The photo: Is it a baby’s leg or a boob?

08:30 – Dan puts Clint through the Sex Addiction Quiz.

10:45 – Clint explains his "honry little dog on a chain" energy.

13:10 – How often does the average Kiwi actually have sex?

15:40 – Guess the Fart: Voice Disguiser Edition.