Christmas catch-ups can be joyful… and also incredibly tense when your kids start noticing that their cousins play by wildly different rules. No screen limits. Loose language. Even underage drinking. In today’s tricky question, Justin and Kylie unpack how to protect your child’s wellbeing without blowing up family relationships — and how to help your kids navigate mixed values with confidence, clarity, and kindness. KEY POINTS Why “forbidden friendships” often backfire — and what to do instead. How to set boundaries without judging extended family. The one conversation to have before a big family catch-up. Why your influence matters more than the cousin’s environment. How to handle major non-negotiables (like alcohol) calmly and clearly. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Force creates resistance — but connection creates influence.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Submit your tricky question: happyfamilies.com.au Voice notes:
[email protected] ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Have a pre-arming conversation. Ask what your child has noticed and how it makes them feel. Clarify your family values without criticising others. Set non-negotiables (e.g., alcohol, screens) with warmth + firmness. Create positive shared experiences on your terms to keep relationships healthy. Model compassion — kids learn more from how we speak about others than from the rules we set. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
New Zealand