No need for Prince Charming

Eight Months from Egg Freezing to Pregnant
Ashleigh's story is one of those ones that will genuinely reassure anyone who is at the very beginning of this journey and quietly terrified about how long it might take.

She was 33 when a friend planted the seed about egg freezing. She went to an initial clinic consultation — more curious than committed — and on the same day, a colleague at work mentioned she'd just had a baby via IVF with a sperm donor. Two seeds in one day. Eight months later, Ashleigh was pregnant.

There were no complications. No failed transfers. No long waitlists. She found a donor quickly, did a fresh IVF cycle alongside her frozen eggs, got six embryos, and fell pregnant on the very first transfer. She still has five embryos in storage.

She's a Queensland primary school teacher who now works three days a week at a school ten minutes from home and daycare. She took Z to Europe for a month at nine months old with her mum. She has connected with donor-conceived siblings — one of whom lives ten minutes away. And when asked what she'd tell someone sitting on the fence, she was in tears before she could even answer.

This is a lovely, warm, uncomplicated episode. Not every story on this podcast is a long or hard one — and that matters. This is proof that sometimes it really does just work.

In this episode:

Spending her 20s and early 30s as a dedicated primary school teacher — and how burnout shifted her thinking about what she actually wanted

A friend's egg freezing journey planting the seed — and a colleague's announcement on the same day as her first clinic appointment

Freezing her eggs at 33 and being pregnant by 34 — eight months from first appointment to positive transfer

Choosing an international donor in Queensland: blue eyes, healthy profile, and deliberately not overthinking it

A fresh IVF cycle alongside her frozen eggs — 15 eggs, 6 embryos, and a positive first transfer

Why she chose IVF over IUI — and the donor consent consideration that drove that decision

A straightforward pregnancy clouded only by constant nausea — teaching primary school while vomiting several times a day

An emergency caesarean and a surprisingly smooth recovery

The newborn phase that was easier than expected — and the 48 hours without sleep in Europe that was not

A month in Europe at nine months — what works, what doesn't, and why nine months is probably the cut-off

Returning to work three days a week at a school ten minutes from home and daycare

Connecting with donor-conceived siblings through the sperm bank's Facebook community — including one family ten minutes away

Five embryos still in storage, the question of a second child, and three flights of stairs

What she'd do differently: building the support network before baby arrives

Key Takeaways

The journey isn't always long — sometimes it really does move quickly, and it's worth starting sooner than you think

You don't need to overthink donor selection — knowing your non-negotiables and keeping a clear head serves you better than analysis paralysis

Choosing IVF over IUI when you want more than one child has practical advantages — embryos offer more protection than stored sperm alone in some circumstances

Build your support network before baby arrives — not after you're in it and everyone around you already has children

Returning to work part-time in a flexible, local role changes everything about the solo mum juggle

Connecting with donor-conceived siblings is better to do on your own terms before they potentially cross paths organically

Frozen embryos give you the luxury of time when it comes to the second child decision — you don't have to rush

This episode is brought to you by City Fertility
Exploring fertility treatment as a solo mum in Australia? City Fertility offers an exclusive 20% discount for No Need for Prince Charming listeners. Claim your discount here.

 

TTC or in your first trimester?
The Expecting Solo course helps you navigate early pregnancy on your own terms — from managing symptoms and setting boundaries to finding the joy in your story. Live or on demand, from anywhere in the world. Find out more here.

Nearly half of first-time mums in Australia will have their labour induced. Most of them have no idea what that actually involves until they're in the middle of it.

This episode is here to change that.

I'm joined by Nat — Melbourne midwife, solo mum of three boys, and someone who has had three very different births of her own (including one that ended with her in ICU — more on that in her own episodes, which are linked below, but maybe save those for after you've had your baby). Nat works in a Melbourne tertiary hospital, and she's here in a personal capacity to give you a practical, informed, non-scary breakdown of what an induction actually is — and what you need to think about as a solo mum specifically.

This is not medical advice. For risks, benefits and research, Nat recommends The Great Birth Rebellion podcast — search your specific situation and you'll find the evidence base you need. What this episode gives you is the foundational knowledge to walk into those conversations with your care provider informed, confident, and asking the right questions.

Because here's what Nat — and I — both wish more women knew before they got to this point: there's a significant difference between being offered an induction because it's hospital policy, and being offered one because of your specific medical situation. Knowing which one you're in changes everything about the conversation you should be having.

In this episode:

What an induction actually is — and the difference between induction and augmentation

Why nearly one in three women are induced in Australia, and nearly half of first-time mums

The two types of induction recommendation: hospital policy versus your specific medical situation — and why this distinction matters

The BRAIN acronym — Benefits, Risks, Alternatives, Intuition, Nothing — and how to use it in any appointment

The bishop score — what it is, what it means, and what happens next depending on the result

The gel and pessary — how they work, how long they take, and what to expect

The balloon catheter — what it actually is, how it works, and why you can ask for gas and air

Breaking your waters — what it involves and why it's less dramatic than it sounds by this point

The oxytocin (syntocin) drip — how it works, why it's different from natural labour, and why Nat recommends going in with an open mind about epidurals

CTG monitoring — what the straps are doing, what the numbers mean, and what it means when they adjust the drip

Why an induction can take two to three days — and what that means practically for solo mums with limited support

Birth plans, support people, doulas, private midwives, and student midwives — your real options

How to advocate for yourself if you're being pushed in a direction you're not comfortable with

Birth trauma — what causes it, and how being informed reduces your risk

Postpartum doulas and private midwives — what they can do for you after baby arrives

Setting your home up for a C-section even if you're aiming for a vaginal birth

Key Takeaways

Ask your care provider: is this induction recommendation based on hospital policy, or on my specific medical situation? The answer should change how you respond

Use the BRAIN acronym in every appointment — Benefits, Risks, Alternatives, Intuition, Nothing

An induction can take two to three days — plan your support accordingly, and don't assume you'll have your baby the same day

If you're a solo mum without a support person, a doula or student midwife can be your advocate in the birth suite — and they don't count toward your support person limit

Research epidurals before you need one — going into an induction without considering it sets you up for a harder experience

Prepare your home for a C-section recovery even if that's not your plan — the solo mum who has meals in the freezer and grab rails in the bathroom will thank herself no matter what happens

Birth trauma comes from not being heard, not from the type of birth — being informed is protective

You can say stop at any point in this process. Even mid-induction. You are not obligated to continue anything without being heard

Resources Mentioned

The Great Birth Rebellion podcast — evidence-based research on all birth scenarios

The Positive Birth Company - bite-sized, scenario-by-scenario birth education

The Complete Guide to Postpartum: A mother-focused companion for life after birth by Sophie Walker's postpartum book — highly recommended for solo mums preparing for the fourth trimester

Nat's episodes on this podcast — Part 1 and Part 2 (save for after baby is here)

This episode is brought to you by City Fertility
Exploring fertility treatment as a solo mum in Australia? City Fertility offers an exclusive 20% discount for No Need for Prince Charming listeners. Claim your discount here.

 

Pregnant solo and looking for your village?
The Bump Membership is a private WhatsApp community and fortnightly Zoom connection calls for solo mums-to-be across Australia and New Zealand. Join here.

When Maree came on to record, she had just had her very first IUI. She was 35, freshly into treatment, overwhelmed by the scan schedule, quietly terrified, and moving back in with her parents to make it financially possible. We recorded Part 1 that day.

Then we waited.

Part 2 picks up on the other side — after two unsuccessful IUIs, a full IVF cycle with PCOS that produced 29 eggs and four embryos, a frozen transfer that worked on the first attempt, and the arrival of Ellena via a planned maternal-assisted caesarean. Maree pulled her own daughter out. She cut the cord herself.

In between, she navigated a lot. Fibroids that grew significantly during IVF and were monitored throughout pregnancy. An anterior placenta that meant she barely felt Ellena move until 26 weeks. Nausea so constant and all-consuming that she didn't show until very late — the hospital receptionist didn't believe she was there for a caesarean. Tongue tie, silent reflux, and a Tresilian residential stay that changed everything. And a hip dysplasia diagnosis — DDH — that her maternal health nurse picked up at two weeks, and that her paediatrician almost let slip through. Ellena is currently in a Rhino brace. She's also, by all accounts, obsessed with the nine-year-old next door who has decided that Ellena is her cousin and introduces her as such to everyone she meets.

Maree works in disability support, lives with her parents in regional New South Wales, has ankylosing spondylitis managed by immunosuppressant medication, and came to this whole thing alone — no partner, no previous solo mum in her circle, just a childcare worker who remembered a mum she worked with in 2010 who had done it this way, and quietly filed it away.

This episode will resonate deeply for women at the very beginning of this journey. And for the women who are already in it.

In this episode:

Growing up in childcare and knowing motherhood was always the plan — but never meeting anyone

A solo mum of twins at her childcare centre in 2010 planting a seed that never went away

PCOS, fibroids and ankylosing spondylitis — discovering her health picture only after starting fertility investigations

Choosing City Fertility for their transparency, the Adam app, and accessible pricing

Navigating CMV-negative donor requirements and genetic carrier matching — a pool within a pool

The counselling session that changed how she thought about overseas versus local donors

Two IUI cycles — painful, unsuccessful, and the moment she said enough

An IVF cycle just before Christmas: 29 eggs, four embryos, OHSS, and a green whistle egg retrieval she was awake for

A frozen transfer in January — positive on first attempt, testing every day for three weeks regardless

Fibroids monitored throughout pregnancy, anterior placenta, barely feeling movement until 26 weeks

A planned maternal-assisted caesarean — and why having some control back made all the difference

Tongue tie, nerve pain, and the lactation journey that ended in formula — and peace

A Tresilian residential stay she almost refused — and the silent reflux diagnosis that transformed their nights

Hip dysplasia (DDH): picked up at two weeks, nearly dismissed at 16 weeks, confirmed by X-ray at four months

Living with her parents, building a village from scratch, and finding another local solo mum through the SMS Facebook group

Plans for a second child — and why Ellena having a full genetic sibling matters to her

Key Takeaways:

Get your fertility tests done before you think you need them — PCOS and fibroids are often only discovered when you start looking

CMV status affects your donor pool significantly — ask your clinic about this early

The fertility counselling session is not a gate check — it's genuinely useful, particularly around donor sibling connections and overseas vs local donors

A green whistle egg retrieval (awake, no general anaesthetic) is becoming more common — ask your clinic about your options

Maternal-assisted caesarean is an option worth knowing about — you can be the first person to hold your baby, even in theatre

Silent reflux doesn't always present with vomiting — constant feeding, gasping and poor sleep can be the signs

Hip dysplasia (DDH) in newborns: ultrasounds can miss it in wriggly babies. Push for an X-ray referral if you have any concerns

Don't cancel the specialist appointment just because a paediatrician says it's fine — trust your instincts and get the second opinion

Moving home temporarily is a practical, sensible, brave choice

This episode is brought to you by City Fertility
As a No Need for Prince Charming listener, you're eligible for an exclusive 20% discount on fertility services at any City Fertility clinic. Claim your discount here.

TTC or pregnant and looking for your village?
The Bump Membership is a private WhatsApp community and fortnightly Zoom connection calls for solo mums-to-be across Australia and New Zealand. Join here.

Part 2: 160 Days, and Then Home
Trigger warning: This episode discusses premature birth, NICU and neonatal medical procedures.

Missed Part 1? Start with S5:E11 — Luce's IVF journey, multiple losses, and the night her membranes ruptured at 22 weeks.

Gabe was born at 10:35am on a Wednesday morning, weighing 598 grams. He was 30 centimetres long. He came out flat and silent, and a team of eight people swooped in immediately. Luce didn't know he was a boy for five full minutes.

By quarter past twelve, she was in a wheelchair going upstairs to meet him.

What followed was 160 days in hospital — first at Mercy Hospital for Women in Melbourne, then a transfer to the Royal Children's Hospital for specialist ventilation and heart surgery, and then back to Mercy, and finally, finally, home.

Luce is a critical care nurse. She understood the ventilator settings. She could read the infusion charts. She knew what the numbers meant. And she will tell you, plainly, that none of that made it easier. It just changed how she processed the information.

In Part 2, she takes us through all of it — the five brutal first weeks, the patent ductus arteriosus that needed three rounds of Panadol before surgery was the only option left, the jet ventilator that finally stabilised his lungs, the retinopathy checks she couldn't watch, the first skin-to-skin cuddle, the first bath, the first time the whole family came in together. And the day, 160 days after he was born, that she drove him home.

Gabe is now a few months old in corrected age. He came home on oxygen. He is nearly off it. He has big cheeks and tape on his face and Luce is planning his autumn photo shoot.

She calls him her screaming one. You can hear him in the background near the end of the episode.

He made it.

In this episode:

The birth at 24 weeks — what happened in the room, and the five minutes before Luce knew she'd had a boy

Gabe's first hours — intubated, on a ventilator, wrapped in bubble wrap, and brought over to meet his mum

The first five weeks — infection, ventilation challenges, blood transfusions, and constant up and down

Patent ductus arteriosus — what it is, why it mattered, and the bedside heart surgery that changed everything

Transfer to the Royal Children's Hospital for a jet ventilator — and the 2am crisis she'd told them not to call her about unless it was dire

The milestones that matter in NICU — extubation, CPAP, high flow, low flow, open cot, first bath, first clothes

Retinopathy of prematurity — the eye checks Luce couldn't watch, and why early monitoring matters

Pumping, sleep, driving an hour each way, and learning to leave the hospital to protect her own mental health

How she managed mental health through IVF and NICU — including low-dose antidepressants and a counsellor she plans to return to

The Gabe Gazette — how sharing publicly became both a coping mechanism and a gift for him to read one day

Home at 160 days, on overnight oxygen, nearly off it, with a pediatrician and respiratory specialist and the autumn light waiting

"While you're alone — you're not alone."

 

This episode is brought to you by City Fertility
If you're exploring fertility treatment as a solo mum in Australia, City Fertility offers an exclusive 20% discount for No Need for Prince Charming listeners. nClaim your discount here

 

Pregnant solo and looking for support?
The Expecting Solo course helps you navigate early pregnancy on your own terms — from managing symptoms to setting boundaries and finding the joy in your story. Live group sessions or on demand, from anywhere in the world. Find out more here

 

Key Takeaways

Having medical knowledge changes how you receive information in a NICU setting — it doesn't make it easier emotionally

Setting boundaries with hospital staff about when to call is okay — and sometimes essential for your mental health

Getting out of the hospital — fresh air, dinners, watching the grand final with your dad — is not abandoning your baby. It's survival

Proactive mental health support through IVF and NICU isn't optional — address it before you're in crisis, not after

The NICU community — other parents, nurses, peer support workers — is one of the most unexpected sources of strength

The Little Miracles Foundation offers peer support specifically for NICU families in Australia

Sharing your journey publicly, on your own terms, can be cathartic and protective — it keeps people informed without you having to repeat yourself

If your friend has a baby in NICU, don't ask what you can do. Just do something — bring food, do laundry, show up

Trigger warning: This episode discusses perinatal loss, pregnancy after loss, premature birth.

Some stories hold grief and joy in the same hands. Gemma's is one of them.

Gemma is the youngest of three sisters, from one of those enormous, chaotic, deeply close families — her mum one of eleven, Gemma one of twenty-something first cousins, Christmases that required crowd control. Motherhood was never a question. The path to it just looked nothing like she expected.

She started IVF at 40 through City Fertility with Dr David Wilkinson, following a PCOS diagnosis that had been quietly there for years, masked by the pill she'd been on since her teens for her skin. Her first cycle gave her three embryos. Her second transfer was successful. She was pregnant, and everything seemed fine — until the 20-week scan.

Her first little boy, Thomas, had severe intrauterine growth restriction. He was measuring below the first percentile. She knew in her gut from that day that it wasn't going to end the way she hoped. A month of additional scans confirmed it — he was no longer going to survive. That weekend, while Gemma was at the beach with her mum and sister, Thomas quietly let go. She was induced at the Monash that Monday, and he was born on the 10th of March 2023. She named him Thomas — her papa's name.

She talks about all of it. The grief. The immediate instinct to do another egg collection while her eggs were still viable. A third cycle that produced over thirty eggs and no embryos. A fourth cycle that produced one. And then, in March 2024, the transfer of the very last embryo from that very first cycle — the one that had been frozen alongside Thomas — that became Henry.

Henry was born via emergency caesarean at 34 weeks, weighing 1.512 kilograms. He spent 37 days in special care. He came home for Christmas. He is now 15 months old, has just started walking, and recently fell off the climbing equipment at daycare head first.

Gemma says she wouldn't change any of it.

In this episode:

Growing up in a huge close-knit family, always knowing motherhood was part of the plan

A PCOS diagnosis at 38 — and how she'd been masking the symptoms with the pill for years

Negotiating paid parental leave with her employer — and why it's worth having the conversation

IVF at 40 with Dr David Wilkinson: one cycle, three embryos, pregnant on the second transfer

The 20-week scan that changed everything — and trusting her gut when her body told her something was wrong

Losing Thomas to severe IUGR, the weekend at the beach, and delivering him on the 10th of March

Going straight back to Dr Wilkinson — and the third cycle that produced thirty-plus eggs and zero embryos

A fourth cycle, one embryo, and then the transfer that became Henry

The full-circle moment: Henry and Thomas were from the same egg collection, frozen on the same day

The donor who agreed to do a blood test for genetic testing during Thomas's pregnancy — and what that meant to Gemma

Pregnancy after loss: weekly scans, a private obstetrician, a perinatal psychiatrist, and monitoring her blood pressure daily

The emergency caesarean at 34 weeks — and why the decision took about five seconds

37 days in special care, expressing, the decision to move to formula, and six months living with Mum in the country

Henry at 15 months: walking, co-sleeping, an early riser, and absolutely besotted with by everyone who meets him

Key Takeaways:

PCOS is often masked by the pill — if you have symptoms and are thinking about your fertility, ask your GP for an AMH test

It's worth having an honest conversation with your employer about paid parental leave — don't assume what isn't available

Trust your gut during pregnancy. Gemma knew before the scans confirmed it. That instinct matters

Pregnancy after loss requires its own support team — a private OB, a perinatal psychologist or psychiatrist, and regular monitoring are not luxuries

Formula is not failure. It can be the decision that saves your mental health

Moving home temporarily is a practical and wise choice — not a step backwards

Genetic testing after loss can give you important information — and clarity — for future transfers

This episode is brought to you by City Fertility
Did you know City Fertility has their own sperm bank — ADDAM — with no waiting times and a wide selection of donors? Download the Adam app or visit atomdonorbank.com.au to begin your search. And as a No Need for Prince Charming listener, you're eligible for an exclusive 20% discount on fertility services at any City Fertility clinic. Claim your discount here.

TTC or pregnant and looking for your village?
The Bump Membership is a private WhatsApp community and fortnightly Zoom connection calls for solo mums-to-be across Australia and New Zealand. Join here.