In The Heart Of The Vault

BROKEN TO BE BEAUTIFUL. THE FORGING OF A WARRIOR. 💜

What happens when a woman survives what no mother should ever have to endure — and decides that her pain will not be the end of her story?

Meet Xena Schembri.

A mother of four, an author, a counsellor, and a woman whose own experience of domestic violence and the abuse of her children changed the course of her life forever.

But her story doesn’t end with what happened to her.

Alongside her husband, Simon, Xena helped build a new life and founded At The Ark, an organisation dedicated to supporting families affected by domestic and family violence and child sexual abuse.

She went on to write Broken to Be Beautiful and create the Brave Little Bear children’s books, helping equip the next generation with the knowledge, language and confidence to speak up and protect themselves.

She took experiences that could have silenced her and turned them into a mission to protect others.

Not because the pain was fair. Not because healing is easy. But because she knows firsthand what happens when families are left trying to navigate trauma alone.

This conversation is about courage, motherhood, survival, rebuilding and the extraordinary things that can grow from the darkest chapters of our lives.

Because being broken is not the same as being defeated. And your past does not have to define your future.

FIND XENA:
https://www.attheark.org.au/

Sometimes, understanding the parent you’ve become means going back to the child you once were.

This is a very different kind of conversation for In The Heart Of The Vault.

Before I talk about Charlie and the experiences we’ve navigated together, I wanted to share some of my own story — because our past doesn’t simply disappear when we become parents.

Our experiences, our fears, the things we’ve lived through and the things we’ve carried can shape how we respond when our own children face challenges we never imagined.

As I’ve navigated Charlie’s complex medical journey, I’ve come to understand more about myself, the experiences that have shaped me, and the ways I’ve been able to show up differently for him.

Not because I’ve got everything figured out. Not because the decisions are easy. But because sometimes, the hardest experiences teach us things about ourselves that we only understand years later.

This episode is about my story, Charlie’s story, and the connection between the two.

Because sometimes, the work we do within ourselves changes the way we show up for the people we love most.

What happens when the person you’ve spent years waiting for finally comes home — but life doesn’t look anything like you imagined?

Zoe Cullen joined me for one of the most honest conversations I’ve had about the reality of living alongside PTSD, trauma and moral injury — not just for the person experiencing it, but for the entire family.

Zoe is a mum of four and, for many years, found herself carrying the responsibility of raising her family while her husband, Australian Army veteran Andrew Cullen, spent long periods away serving his country.

She spoke openly about the reality she hadn’t anticipated — the loneliness, the exhaustion, the loss of her own identity and the resentment that can build when you feel like you’re carrying everything alone.

And then he came home.

But coming home didn’t mean everything simply went back to how it was before.

The PTSD, disconnection, withdrawal and loss of identity affected not only Andrew, but Zoe, their relationship and their children. Zoe shares what it was like to love someone through trauma while trying to hold a family together — and the profound impact that experience had on her too.

But their story didn’t end there.

Together, Zoe and Andrew became co-authors of Resurrected – A Story of Hope, sharing their family’s journey through trauma, recovery and renewed purpose.

What began as their own story eventually became something much bigger.

Today, Zoe is President and Co-Founder of PTSD Resurrected Inc., working alongside Andrew to support veterans, first responders, families and the wider community through trauma and moral injury recovery.

She co-facilitates RESTORE and Restoring the Homefront, advocates for veterans and their families, and their work has grown into creating pathways that help people understand trauma, reconnect with themselves and each other, and find a way forward.

Because trauma doesn’t only affect the person carrying it.

It affects the people who love them.
The people raising the children.
The people holding everything together.
And sometimes, the people who quietly lose themselves along the way.

This is a conversation about PTSD, moral injury, family, identity, resilience, recovery — and what can happen when your own lived experience becomes the catalyst for helping others.

Find Zoe Here:
https://ptsdresurrected.org/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/zoe-cullen-47808a8a?utm_source=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=member_ios

Bronte met her childhood sweetheart at 15. They married at 19, had their first baby at 21, followed by another child and then twins.

Four beautiful children. A home they were building. A life she had always dreamed of.

But somewhere along the way, Bronte lost herself.

She felt like a failure because she’d always wanted her children to have both parents together. When she reached out for support, she was made to feel like the problem was hers — and if it was her problem, then it was her responsibility to fix it.

This was also the only relationship she’d ever known, so she had nothing to compare it to. She questioned herself, withdrew, and found herself crying alone at night, sometimes hiding in her wardrobe while her husband slept.

She tried. She asked for couples therapy. She tried to hold everything together while raising three children under 18 months and a four-year-old, navigating work, financial pressure and a marriage where she felt increasingly alone.

Eventually, she made the incredibly difficult decision to leave.

Not because there wasn’t still love. Not because it was easy. But because she knew she couldn’t let her children grow up believing that this was what a healthy relationship looked like.

Now, years later, Bronte shares the realities of separation and 50/50 co-parenting, the challenges that came with her decision, and the peace she has found on the other side.

Because sometimes sadness and happiness can coexist.

And sometimes choosing to walk away isn’t choosing yourself over your children.

It’s choosing a healthier, happier life for them too.

This is Bronte’s story — of losing herself, finding her courage, and finally learning to trust what she knew in her heart.

There’s something I’ve always loved about being a mum…Seeing the world through my children’s eyes.This is actually the third time Evie has joined me on the podcast, but this conversation was completely different.We sat down and talked about what it’s actually like to be 19 — almost 20 — today.Dating. Friendships. Social media. Going out. Drinking (or not drinking). Growing into yourself. The conversations we have as mum and daughter. The things she thinks about that I never would have thought about at her age.And what I loved most was hearing her perspective.Because sometimes, as parents, we think our job is to teach our children.But I honestly believe our kids are some of our biggest teachers.They challenge the way we see the world. They open our minds. And they give us a perspective we simply can’t get anywhere else.And I feel incredibly lucky that Evie and I have always had such open communication. That openness even extends to her friends, who will sit and talk to me about things too.But I also know that not every young person has that person they feel safe enough to talk to.So this conversation isn’t just for mums and daughters.It’s for parents, carers, siblings, grandparents — anyone who loves a young person and wants to understand a little more about the world they’re growing up in.Just a really honest, funny and sometimes surprising conversation about LIFE at 19.And I think you’ll love hearing it through her eyes. ❤️

evie's social media: @eviebellahayes on tiktok and instagram