#197: What Avoidant People Need to Thrive in a Relationship
In today’s episode, we’re exploring what avoidant attached people actually need to feel safe and secure in a relationship — and how partners can support that without self-abandoning.Avoidant attachment is often misunderstood — labelled as cold, distant, or commitment-phobic. But when we look beneath those surface-level behaviours, what we often find is a deep need for space, safety, and self-reliance.We’ll cover:Why space needs to be respected, not punishedThe importance of having a partner who can self-regulate rather than emotionally offloadHow clear, direct, and honest communication builds safetyThe value of each partner having a full, meaningful life outside the relationshipWhy pacing matters — and how moving too fast can trigger shutdownBalancing lightness and heaviness Whether you’re avoidant yourself or in a relationship with someone who is, this episode will help you better understand the conditions that allow these relationships to thrive.Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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21:39
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21:39
#196: How & Why We Self-Abandon in Relationships
If you deeply fear abandonment, there’s a good chance you’ve also been abandoning yourself in quiet, subtle, and painful ways.In today’s episode, we’re exploring how fear of abandonment often leads to patterns of self-abandonment — especially for those with anxious attachment. We’ll look at why this happens, how it shows up in your relationships, and what it actually costs you when you disconnect from your truth just to stay connected to someone else.You’ll learn:Why self-abandonment is often a survival strategy rooted in early attachment woundsWhat self-abandonment looks like in dating and relationshipsThe trade-off between authenticity and connectionWhy the work must begin with us Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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19:08
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19:08
#195: Two Simple Principles for a Healthy Nervous System
In today’s episode, I’m sharing two key principles for building a truly resilient, balanced nervous system — and why one without the other tends to keep us stuck.We’ll explore:Why nervous system health isn’t about being relaxed all the timeThe importance of deliberate stress exposure to build capacity and resilienceThe equally vital need to resource and nourish ourselves through rest, pleasure, and co-regulationHow to work with the natural ebb and flow of activation and recoveryA simple metaphor to help you reflect on how you’re currently supporting your systemWhether you’re feeling burnt out, dysregulated, or just curious about how to better support your emotional wellbeing, this episode offers a grounded, compassionate reframe of what nervous system care can look like.Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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11:04
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11:04
#194: When You Don’t Feel Like a Priority in Your Relationship
If you often feel like you're fighting for a place in your partner’s life—like you’re always waiting to be chosen or noticed—this episode is for you.This is one of the most common experiences for people with anxious attachment: that persistent, painful feeling of being sidelined. Of giving so much, while wondering if you even matter to the person you love. And when that becomes a pattern, it can quietly erode your sense of self-worth.In this episode, I’m unpacking:Why anxiously attached people are so sensitive to feeling deprioritisedHow this dynamic often plays out in anxious-avoidant relationshipsThe emotional cost of constantly striving to be chosenWhat you can focus on to reclaim your power and stop abandoning yourself in the processWhether you’re currently in a relationship or reflecting on a past one, this conversation will help you make sense of what’s happening and offer practical ways to move forward with more clarity, dignity, and self-trust.Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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18:49
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18:49
#193: The Gifts of Anxious Attachment
While it’s easy to focus on the struggles of anxious attachment — overthinking, people-pleasing, fear of abandonment — there are also real gifts that often go hand-in-hand with these attachment patterns. When held with awareness and intention, many of the traits we associate with anxious attachment can become powerful strengths in our relationships and our lives.I’ll be exploring:Why it’s important to move beyond pathologising anxious attachmentThe qualities that often develop through lived experience with this patternHow your sensitivity, attunement, and relational depth can become assetsThe difference between operating from fear vs. secure self-expressionHow to start embracing your relational gifts without losing yourselfWhether you're in the thick of healing or just starting to understand your patterns, I hope this episode leaves you feeling acknowledged for all that is beautiful about you!Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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