One Degree Marriage: Christ-Centered Communication & Habits

Where to eat tonight is easy. Whether to move, which church to call home, or how to school your kids is not, and those are the moments that reveal whether we actually have a healthy way of deciding together or have just been getting lucky.
This week we take on the question a lot of couples never say out loud: when you have prayed, talked it through, stayed kind, and still don't agree, who gets the final say? Building on our recent conversations about what it looks like to be a godly wife and a godly husband, we name three ditches couples drift into, then walk through the process we actually use for big decisions in our own marriage. We share real stories from choosing a seminary, moving to Wisconsin, and switching churches, and we get honest about where headship fits and where it absolutely does not.

Feeling more like roommates than teammates lately? Or maybe things are good, but you know there’s room to go deeper. In this replay of one of our most popular episodes (a rare solo one, since it’s just Xan this time), we walk through 7 practical habits that deeply connected couples actually practice. You don’t have to do all seven. Pick one or two to start this week and watch how those small, one-degree shifts add up.
These habits aren’t a checklist to crush. Our hope is that they encourage you to seek the Lord more deeply first, and then to seek deeper connection with your spouse.
Resources mentioned:
Free Weekly Marriage Meeting Template: onedegreemarriage.com/meeting
Weekly Marriage Meeting Journal: onedegreemarriage.com

If this episode encouraged you, share it with a couple who might need it, and subscribe so you never miss a one-degree shift.

Most husbands have heard that they are the head of the home. Far fewer have been told what kind of head they are supposed to be, and that gap is where a lot of quiet disconnection in a marriage starts.
This week we sit down with Ephesians 5 and read it slowly, starting back at verse 18 where the whole thing is anchored: be filled with the Spirit. From there we work through what Paul actually asks of husbands, and it is not enforcement. Paul never tells a husband to make sure his wife submits. He spends three verses on wives and nine on husbands, and every one of those nine points the same direction: sacrificial love, modeled on a Jesus who washed feet and went to the cross. We look at what headship is not, four specific things Ephesians 5 asks husbands to do, and what all of it looks like on an ordinary Tuesday when nobody is watching. We also get honest about our own house, including where each of us is most tempted to lead by control instead of by serving.
If you listened to last week's episode on what Ephesians 5 asks of wives, this is the other half of that conversation.

This week we're bringing back one of our most popular episodes ever. If you're new here, welcome! And if you heard it the first time around, we think it's worth a second listen.
What does it really mean for wives to "submit" to their husbands in Ephesians 5? Few verses about marriage cause more tension, confusion, or quiet eye rolls. Is submission blind obedience? Does it mean tolerating sin or abuse? Is it outdated or oppressive? Or is it something deeper, and actually freeing?
In this episode, we unpack what the Bible really says about being a godly wife, how submission and respect play out in real life, and why this passage makes no sense unless you read it alongside Christ's call for husbands to love sacrificially.
In this episode, we cover:
What biblical submission is not
Why Ephesians 5 has to be read alongside the call for husbands to love like Christ
What submission looks like on an ordinary Tuesday
How respect, encouragement, and trust play out practically
Why submission is ultimately an act of worship to Christ

If you've wrestled with this passage, or avoided it altogether, this conversation will help you think biblically, clearly, and courageously about your role in marriage.
Scripture referenced: Ephesians 5:22-33, 1 Peter 3, Genesis 2
If this one helped, send it to a friend who has ever wrestled with this passage. Subscribe wherever you listen so you never miss an episode, and if you have a minute, leaving a review helps other couples find this Christian marriage podcast. Love you, fam.

The holidays are still months away on the calendar and already somebody is asking whose house you are coming to. If that question makes your stomach tighten, you are not the only couple feeling it.
This week we are talking about what it actually looks like to set healthy boundaries with in-laws and extended family without blowing up the relationship. We walk through what Genesis 2:24 means by leave and cleave, why leaving your father and mother never cancels the command to honor them, and two of the healthiest in-law relationships in scripture. Then we get practical with five principles for navigating parents, in-laws, aunts, uncles, and everybody else who has an opinion about your marriage. We also talk honestly about the harder situations: what honoring looks like when there is addiction or abuse in the family, how to explain a limited relationship to your kids without tearing anyone down, and how to hold the holidays gently when grief is sitting at the table.
Resources mentioned:
Genesis 2:24 and Jesus quoting it in Matthew 19
The command to honor your father and mother, Exodus 20:12
Ruth 1:16
Exodus 18, Jethro's counsel to Moses
Our episode from two weeks ago on why your marriage was never meant to be private
Free Weekly Marriage Meeting Template: https://onedegreemarriage.com/meeting

Here is your one degree shift: before the end of this month, sit down together and decide your Thanksgiving and Christmas plans out loud. Ask each other which tradition you would actually grieve losing and which one you would not mind letting go. Then tell both families what you decided, together. If this is the Christian marriage podcast conversation you have been avoiding, start with that fifteen minute talk. Share this episode with one couple heading into a tense holiday season, subscribe so you do not miss next week, and if it helped, leave us a review so other couples can find it.