Nourishing the Mother

What happens when you love your children, your partner and the life you’ve created...and still sometimes feel completely trapped by it?

In Part 1 of this three-part answer pathway, we respond to a listener who is buckling under the weight of motherhood, work, relationships and the relentless responsibility of being needed. Rather than giving you another list of things to do to “find yourself again”, we start somewhere deeper: understanding what is actually creating your suffering. We explore how comparing the life you have to the life you used to have, or the life you wish you could have, can leave you feeling increasingly resentful, burdened and stuck. We show you how to get specific about what you believe you’ve lost, what you’ve gained that you never wanted, and the evidence you may be unconsciously collecting to prove that your life is the problem.

This is the first step in moving from “I feel trapped by my life” towards understanding what you’re actually longing for, what needs to change, and where more freedom, fulfilment and choice might already be waiting for you.

In this episode we discuss:

* Why you can love your family and still feel trapped by your life
* What you’re actually longing for when you fantasise about escaping it all
* Why motherhood can leave you grieving the woman and freedom you used to have
* How to work out exactly what is making you feel so resentful, burdened and stuck
* Why comparing your life now to the life you used to have is making you suffer
* The stories you keep telling yourself that might be making your life feel even harder
* Why you keep finding more evidence that you’re trapped, unhappy or have lost yourself
* How to stop making your current life the problem without pretending you love everything about it
* What to do when you know something needs to change, but you have no idea what
* The first step towards feeling more freedom, choice and fulfilment in the life you already have

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub

Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life

In this deeply personal solo episode, Julie responds to listener questions about her hysterectomy experience four years after surgery. 

From the realities of recovery and unexpected complications to the impact on sex, orgasm, identity, and womanhood, she shares the parts few people talk about openly. This is a candid conversation about what she gained, what she lost, what surprised her most, and why she would still make the same decision again. 

Fair warning: there is plenty of TMI in this episode - including discussions about vaginas, orgasms, catheters, numbness, butt pain, and all the messy, human realities of healing.

In this episode, Julie discusses:
- Why she ultimately chose hysterectomy after 17 years of prolapse and adenomyosis
- The years-long decision-making process leading up to surgery
- The unexpected emotional impact of community criticism and losing friendships
- What happened when her urethra stopped functioning after surgery
- Why self-catheterisation became a surprisingly empowering experience
- The reality of recovery versus the commonly promoted six-week timeline
- Significant fatigue and healing challenges during the first six months
- The surgical complexity of removing a severely enlarged uterus
- What nobody told her about post-surgical butt pain
- Developing vaginismus for the first time after surgery
- Nerve healing, numbness, and changing sensation inside the vagina
- The loss of cervical orgasm and how that affected her sexuality
- Whether orgasmic capacity can be rebuilt after hysterectomy
- The surprising sexual benefits she experienced post-surgery
- Using tantra, somatic practice, toys, vibrators and blindfolds to support recovery
- Rewiring pleasure pathways and treating sexual healing as neurorehabilitation
- Navigating identity without a uterus while still feeling deeply connected to womanhood
- Continuing womb-space practices despite no longer having a womb
- The overlap between hysterectomy recovery and perimenopause
- What she wishes she'd known before surgery
- The advice she would give any woman considering a hysterectomy today
- Why, despite the trade-offs, she has never regretted her decision

Other episodes on Julie's hysterectomy journey:

351
https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/ntm-351-lets-lift-the-veil-on-the-shame-of-post-partum-healing/id1013746031?i=1000554021072

356
https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/ntm-356-post-birth-pelvic-pain-shame-and-dysfunction/id1013746031?i=1000557953386

357
https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/ntm-357-post-birth-pelvic-pain-shame-and-dysfunction/id1013746031?i=1000558686443

378
https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/ntm-378-when-you-dance-with-becoming-what-youve-always/id1013746031?i=1000579970437

385
https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/nourishing-the-mother/id1013746031?i=1000585379354

NTM 443: Healing from pelvic surgery - what’s it like, one year on?
https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/ntm-443-healing-from-pelvic-surgery-whats-it-like-one-year-on/id1013746031?i=1000638978979

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub

Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life

If you've ever found yourself snapping at your partner, yelling at your children, or wondering why your anger feels bigger, faster and harder to contain than it used to, this conversation is for you. In this episode, we unpack the silence-explode cycle so many women find themselves trapped in, particularly during the motherhood and perimenopause years. We explore why anger isn't the problem, what it's trying to tell you, how depletion, over-functioning, sleep deprivation and hormonal changes shorten your fuse, and why the real work isn't suppressing your anger or unleashing it on everyone around you - it's learning to listen to the deeper truth underneath it.

In this episode we discuss:
- Why anger isn't the problem - and why we need to stop making it the villain
- The silence-explode cycle and how pressure builds long before the outburst
- Why motherhood, perimenopause, ADHD, burnout and depletion can shorten your fuse
- Anger as a messenger rather than something to suppress or fear
- The shame spiral that often follows explosive reactions
- The difference between expressing a feeling and reacting from it
- Emotional truth versus conscious, integrity-led behaviour
- How threat responses hijack our ability to choose how we show up
- The softer truths often hiding beneath anger - hurt, loneliness, disappointment and unmet needs
- Why anger acts as armour protecting something more vulnerable
- Learning to stay in your body instead of abandoning yourself when anger arises
- The importance of safety, pauses and nervous system regulation before communication
- Creating more space between trigger and reaction
- Self-compassion, accountability and personal responsibility
- The identity shifts many women experience through motherhood and perimenopause
- Letting go of the "good girl" who keeps everything together until she can't
- Why sleep, nourishment, hydration and rest matter more than we think
- Building a healthier relationship with anger that supports connection rather than destruction
- Asking: What is anger trying to tell me?
- How self-awareness becomes the pathway from rage to revealing.

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub

Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life

What happens when one partner feels like they are carrying the invisible weight of parenting, household management, life admin, remembering, planning, and emotional labour… while the other insists they’re helping?

In this episode, Julie and Bridget unpack one of the most common resentment loops they see in relationships: the gap between effort and ownership. They explore why “helping” can still leave a primary parent feeling deeply alone, how over-functioning and under-functioning quietly reinforce each other, and why this conversation is so often less about chores… and more about responsibility. Together, they dive into the mental load, the defensiveness trap, gendered conditioning, breadwinning, and the exhausting dynamic of one person becoming the household manager while the other becomes the assistant.

This is not about blame or shame - it’s about redefining partnership, shared ownership, and what it actually means to fully participate in the adult life you created together. If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in the “But I already do so much” versus “I still feel alone in this” cycle… this episode is for you.

In this episode we discuss:
- Why the mental load conversation so often becomes one of the most emotionally charged dynamics in modern relationships
- The difference between “helping” and genuine ownership - and why that distinction matters more than most couples realise
- How “I’m helping” can still leave one partner feeling like the default manager of the household, children, and life admin
- Why this issue is often less about effort… and more about responsibility
- The invisible labour of parenting: appointments, school calendars, sports runs, permission slips, meal planning, remembering, anticipating, emotional regulation
- How “Just tell me what to do” can still leave the primary parent carrying the full cognitive burden
- Why one partner often feels deeply alone… while the other feels like nothing they do is ever enough
- The defensiveness cycle: “But I already do so much” vs “I still feel like I carry this alone”
- How over-functioning in one partner can unintentionally create under-functioning in the other
- The impact of gender roles, family-of-origin modelling, and socialisation on how couples divide responsibility
- Why “help” language can accidentally reinforce inequality rather than partnership
- The shift from assistance… to shared ownership
- Why being a primary breadwinner matters - but doesn’t automatically exempt someone from adult responsibility at home
- How to stop “borrowing the brain” of the overloaded partner and start taking proactive responsibility
- Why couples often need skill-building, handover conversations, and grace while renegotiating long-held patterns
- The importance of moving from scorekeeping and blame… into conscious, regularly renegotiated partnership
- Why becoming better housemates can often be the first step toward becoming better lovers
- The real goal: creating a family system where neither partner feels like they are carrying adulthood alone

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub

Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life

Perimenopause can feel like your body, mind and identity are shifting beneath your feet - but what if this season is not simply hormonal chaos to survive, but a profound invitation into your next evolution?

In this powerful conversation, naturopath and counsellor Charmaine Newmark joins us to explore perimenopause as the transition from mother to matriarch - a deeply biological, emotional and spiritual rite of passage that so many women are navigating without enough support. Together, we unpack the symptoms, stress, body changes, identity shifts and nervous system depletion that can shape this chapter, while offering grounded, practical ways to support your hormones, energy, sleep and sense of self.

In this episode we discuss:
- What perimenopause actually is - and why it can begin years before menopause
- Common symptoms including brain fog, fatigue, sleep disruption, libido changes and weight shifts
- Why stress, burnout and nervous system depletion can intensify hormonal symptoms
- The transition from reproductive woman to matriarch, and the identity shifts that can come with it
- Reframing symptoms from “something is wrong” to understanding what your body is asking for
- The role of protein, fibre, muscle-building and blood sugar support in hormonal wellbeing
- Why sleep becomes essential: and practical ways to improve it
- Rest as a personalised practice rather than a one-size-fits-all approach
- Ownership of time, energy and capacity in this life stage
- How to recognise your limits and support yourself with greater compassion and wisdom
- The importance of self-care that genuinely restores rather than simply adds pressure
- Perimenopause as a powerful opportunity for recalibration, deeper self-trust and redefining how you want to live next

Free guide when you're feeling too tired and overwhelmed to start >>> Nourished You Free Guide — Charmaine Newmark - The Nourished Naturopath
Facebook >>> https://www.facebook.com/charmainenewmarkthenourishednaturopath
Insta >>> https://www.instagram.com/charmaine.newmark.nourished
Website >>> Charmaine Newmark - The Nourished Naturopath

Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclub

Reach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life