NTM 541: Resentment vs. Love: The Energy Behind Your Words
Resentment is quiet… until it isn’t.And when it leaks through your tone, your silence, or the way you half-turn when he walks in the door, it can change the entire ecosystem of your relationship - even when you don’t mean it to.In this episode, we dive into the real energetic difference between speaking from bitterness and speaking from love. We explore why so many long-term couples get caught in confirmation loops, scorekeeping, and micro-withdrawals… and how the smallest shift in tone, softness, or openness can bring a whole relationship back online. Through a client story that moved from near-separation to reconnection, we unpack how resentment builds, how it melts, and why the quality of your “hello” at the door can set the emotional temperature for your whole evening. This episode is a mix of deep truth and deliciously human moments — the friendship, the coaching, and the reality of women doing life and love in real time. In This Episode, We Discuss:• The subtle ways resentment leaks through tone, posture, and silence — even when you think you’re “being fine.”• The client story: from near-divorce to reconnection through clarity, responsibility, and shifting the energy behind her words.• How testing, scorekeeping, and waiting for him to fail creates the very distance you fear.• The difference between speaking from bitterness (“did you even…?”) and speaking from love (“hey love, could you…?”).• The moment a woman realises “everything you don’t do automatically means I do it” — and why this belief keeps resentment alive.• Over-functioning vs under-functioning: how these nervous system patterns lock couples into power struggles.• Why the daily greeting — that tiny “hello” at the door — shapes the entire emotional temperature of your night.• How to create safety and connection by inviting your partner in instead of silently testing them.• The role of exit strategies and why knowing you can leave often makes you stay with more truth and softness.• The magnetic influence women hold in relationships — not through force, but through the energy of receptivity and clarity.• How bonding with friends over partner-complaints keeps you stuck in resentment loops without even realising it.Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclubReach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life
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29:28
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29:28
NTM 540: The Birth You Feel Again: Why Our Children’s Birthdays Bring Up Old Stories
Julie and Bridget dive into why mothers so often feel their children’s birthdays in their bodies - not just as a date on the calendar, but as an emotional echo of who they were when that child arrived. They unpack the surprising way the body holds onto birth memories, how milestone birthdays can reopen old wounds or tender places, and why perimenopause, identity shifts, and grief can hit hard in the background of these celebrations. Together, they explore the collision of timelines: our children growing up while we’re changing, ageing, and renegotiating who we are, and offer gentle questions and reframes to help mothers meet these moments with more compassion, clarity, and reverence for the women they’ve become along the way.In This Episode, We Discuss:* How our children’s birthdays can stir old emotional echoes from the time they were born* Why the body remembers more than we realise; and how those memories resurface during milestones* The surprising overlap between adolescence, perimenopause, and the identity shifts of midlife motherhood* The pull into self-doubt, regret, or “have I done enough?” and why it’s an emotional anniversary, not a failure* Why big feelings around birthdays don’t mean something is wrong — they’re part of the mothering timeline* How to hold yourself through emotional reactivation with softness rather than self-criticism* Gentle questions to help you understand what this milestone is asking you to release, recognise, or step toward* A simple grounding ritual to honour both who you were when they arrived and who you’re becoming nowWant support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclubReach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life
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28:55
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28:55
NTM 539: The Sandwich Generation: The Emotional Load No One Talks About
This week, we’re opening the door on one of the most invisible seasons of womanhood — being in ‘the sandwich generation’. The stretch between raising children and caring for ageing parents can feel like living two lives at once: one full of growth and beginnings, the other shaped by endings and decline. In this conversation, we unpack the exhaustion, the guilt, the grief, and the quiet unraveling that happens when you’re holding everyone else together — and explore how to navigate this season with tenderness, truth, and boundaries that honour your own humanity.In this episode, we discuss:• What it feels like to be stretched to breaking point; emotionally, physically, and financially…while holding generations together.• The whiplash of mothering in both directions: when your parents need care and your kids still need you steady.• How old wounds resurface in caregiving, and how to meet them with compassion instead of collapse.• Grieving while giving: facing mortality, memory loss, and decline while still showing up for life’s daily demands.• Redefining what it means to be a “good daughter” and a “good mother” - and the difference between guilt-driven care and love-led presence.• Why micro-rituals of care are leadership, not luxury…and how they protect your capacity to love.• The courage to let legacy be love, not martyrdom: showing your children that boundaries are devotion.• How couples can stay connected and compassionate through the demands of caring for two generations.Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclubReach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life
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29:48
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29:48
NTM 538: The Guilt Trap: Why Good Mums Feel Bad
If guilt were cardio, every mum would be an Olympian. But what if guilt isn’t proof you’re failing — it’s proof you care? In this episode, we unpack the emotional weight mothers carry and how “mum guilt” has become a badge of honour we never asked for. From the cultural conditioning that tells us a good mother should give everything, to the quiet courage it takes to choose ourselves without crumbling under judgement, we explore how to move from guilt as punishment to guilt as guidance. You’ll learn how to stay anchored in your own truth, meet your children’s reflections with grace, and reclaim a version of motherhood that’s values-led, not shame-fuelled.In this episode we discuss:• How guilt has become the default emotional setting for modern mothers.• The difference between guilt as a values compass and guilt as a shame loop.• When your child says “how can you choose work/friends/yourself over me!” and how to stay calm and anchored instead of defensive or withdrawn.• The courage to be disliked without closing, contorting, or hardening.• Shifting from external validation to self-anchoring: defining your worth from within.• Seeing guilt as a lopsided perception; finding the other side and asking, “Do I need to feel guilty here?”• How to tell when guilt signals a values misalignment versus when you’re actually in alignment.• The patriarchal version of the “good mother” versus the archetypal mother, and which one you’re subscribing to.• How to meet guilt with curiosity, compassion, and objectivity instead of criticism.Want support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclubReach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life
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28:18
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28:18
NTM 537: When They Dig Their Heels In: How to Stay the Steady One
In this episode, we discuss what to do when your child slams the brakes on; from “I’m not going to school” to daily battles over getting dressed or leaving the house. We explore how to stay grounded when their storms threaten to pull you in, how to use play and connection to move through resistance, and why your regulation is the most powerful parenting tool you have. We unpack what happens in your body when you feel backed into a corner, how to find your anchor, and the small moments of humour, affection, and attunement that can shift even the hardest days.In this episode, we discuss:• What’s really happening when your child resists…and why matching their frustration only fuels the fire• How to stay anchored and calm when their emotions feel overwhelming• Using playfulness to shift tension, reconnect, and move through sticky moments• Finding micro-moments of humour and connection when you’re tired or touched-out• Reframing play as a mindset, not another task on your list• How your regulation invites theirs and makes co-regulation possible• Holding the bigger vision for how you want moments like these to end, even when it’s hard• Why there’s no “magic trick” to fix behaviour - but there is a way to lead with steadiness, warmth, and presenceWant support on this journey? Come join us inside Honey Club - where we melt these blocks together, one breath, one practice, one deep remembering at a time. Find out more at julietenner.love or visit: https://julie-tenner.newzenler.com/courses/honeyclubReach out to Bridget for 1:1 coaching - bridgetwood.life
Mothering can be an inspired journey to our most glittering, authentic, passionate, creative and connected selves. Through the mirror offered to us by our children, we are taken to every hurt, unmet need, and also every joy and excitement we’ve ever experienced. We want every woman and mother to give themselves and those around them the compassion, love and healing they so readily offer their children, but rarely allow themselves. Journey with us as we discuss the many layers of being a mother today, where we have come from and where we want to go. Learn tools to connect with yourself, offer compassion to those parts we’d rather deny and get back in love with yourself, motherhood and who you are as a feminine woman.
New Zealand