Parents We've Met

This week we're honoured to have one of our sporting and dad heroes, DJ Forbes, on the Parents We’ve Met couch. A husband, super proud dad to two teens and a legend of the game, DJ was captain of the All Blacks Sevens for nearly a decade, earning more titles, honours and accolades than we can squeeze into this podcast intro.   

In this honest chat, DJ shares with Jenny and Dayna some of the lessons he’s learnt in high-performance sports and how they translate to raising great humans. He talks about navigating different personalities, staying connected as kids grow, and the question many parents quietly carry: have we done enough to prepare them for the world? 

DJ also reflects on his Samoan culture, the lessons from his career that have shaped who he is - and the value he places on growing resilient kids with passion and inner drive.   

Got a parenting challenge you need help with? Book a 1:1 coaching session online or in-person at parentingplace.nz/coaching  

Parents We’ve Met is brought to you by Parenting Place – a charity with a heart for New Zealand families. Explore our self-guided online courses and hundreds of free parenting articles and ideas ⁠⁠⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠.    

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How do you get your kids to do things around the house without nagging or bribing - and does pocket money help or hinder your efforts? Parent coach Kristin Ward joins Jenny and Dayna to talk through the whys and hows of chores and pocket money. 

Kristin shares research that suggests there’s a correlation between involving kids in housework and kids completing their education, getting on a career path, forming better relationships with family and friends – and staying away from drugs. How compelling is that?! 

In this episode, they also cover: 

The perfect age to get them started – and how that might look

What to do when the kids push back, especially as they get older? 

How to navigate pocket money and allowances – and whether they should be linked to chores or not. 

How to manage our own expectations around chores (and not expect perfection!)

Teaching teens to manage money through allowances

How to teach kids about sharing 

Got a parenting challenge you need help with? Book a 1:1 coaching session online or in-person at parentingplace.nz/coaching 

Parents We’ve Met is brought to you by Parenting Place – a charity with a heart for New Zealand families. Explore our self-guided online courses and hundreds of free parenting articles and ideas ⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠.   

Find us on:⁠⁠⁠ YouTube⁠⁠⁠ / ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ / ⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠ / ⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok ⁠⁠⁠/⁠⁠⁠LinkedIn⁠⁠ 
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Parent Coach Kristin Ward is back on the couch this week chatting about building independence in kids - without pushing them too far, too soon. 

Kristin shares research that suggests there’s less ‘roaming’ in kids these days compared to previous decades, meaning the distance that parents allow their kids to move around, especially from their home, has reduced - while other skills that boost independence like cooking and speaking up for oneself have taken a backseat.  

She shares why childhood is the best time for low-stakes consequences and learning through experience, offering advice on how a simple scaffold – watch > do together > do independently – can help boost independence and confidence in a healthy way. She also talks about leaving space for ‘welcome dependence’ when family moments call for it. 

Got a parenting challenge you need help with? Book a 1:1 coaching session online or in-person at parentingplace.nz/coaching 

Parents We’ve Met is brought to you by Parenting Place – a charity with a heart for New Zealand families. Explore our self-guided online courses and hundreds of free parenting articles and ideas ⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠.   

Find us on:⁠⁠⁠ YouTube⁠⁠⁠ / ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ / ⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠ / ⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok ⁠⁠⁠/⁠⁠⁠LinkedIn⁠⁠ 
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Listener note: In this episode we briefly reference eating disorders. We approach this topic gently, but if this is a topic that is sensitive for you, please take care while listening.

Jenny and Dayna are joined this week by one of New Zealand's leading child nutrition experts, Rachael Wilson, for a jam-packed chat on raising kids with healthy, positive relationships with food and their bodies.  

Rachael is a mum-to-two, a UK-trained registered dietician specialising in family feeding, feeding disorders, disordered eating and body image - and co-founder of Aotearoa-based parenting and nutrition initiative, The Food Tree.  

In this episode, Rachael generously shares her knowledge on a wide range of topics, from school lunches, navigating ‘beige food’ phases and selective eating, reducing mealtime battles and role modelling well, to supporting autonomy around food and encouraging positive body talk. 

She also explains ARFID and shares some red flags' parents can look out for; she looks at mindful anxiety regulation around food; and warning signs that might indicate disordered eating in a teen.

Rachael also answers some popular listener questions, including: 

Do my kids have to finish dinner before dessert?

What do I do if their school lunch box comes home half eaten? 

How do I get my child to eat more ‘colourful’ foods? 

Is hiding veges in food a good idea?

Should I insist that my child finishes their plate? 

How do I manage the mountains of chocolate and treats on days like Easter and Halloween? 

If my child is obsessed with a certain food, is it true that I should serve it more often?

What do I do if they won’t eat their dinner, but are complaining about being hungry? 

Should I compliment my child on their appearance? 

For more information on Rachael’s work, visit www.thefoodtree.co. Check out some of the articles referenced in this episode:

https://www.thefoodtree.co/post/let-s-take-the-pressure-out-of-our-children-s-lunchboxes 

https://www.thefoodtree.co/post/ellyn-satter-and-the-division-of-responsibility-how-can-it-help-your-child-s-eating 

For support and resources around eating disorders, check out: https://www.ed.org.nz/

For free support for mental distress, please check out the below resources:

Need to talk? Free call or text 1737 any time for support from a trained counsellor. 

Youthline 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email [email protected] or online chat. 

Just a thought Email: [email protected] 

 
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When their feelings are in the drivers’ seat, family life can feel tough! Parent Coach Sheridan Eketone joins us on the couch this week to unpack high sensitivity in kids and offer some hot tips and encouragement for parents on that journey. 

Together with Jenny and Dayna, she explores what’s going on for sensitive kids and why a simple reframe can turn sensitivity into a gift - a trait to work with, not against. She offers simple strategies for building buffer time and downtime into weekly rhythms, pre-empting and preparing for overwhelming situations, using simple emotional check-ins – and helping to raise them into resilient adults. 

Parents We’ve Met is brought to you by Parenting Place – a charity with a heart for New Zealand families. Explore our self-guided online courses and hundreds of free parenting articles and ideas ⁠⁠HERE⁠⁠.   

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