This week on Self Help(ed), we’re asking one of life’s biggest, messiest questions: are we ever truly ready for kids? From emotional readiness to the realities of rising living costs, shifting timelines, and the infamous biological clock, Tully and Maggie dive into the push-pull of modern motherhood.
Tully shares her own story - a decade of longing to be a mum, egg-freezing (twice), and the occasional 4pm forgotten lunch moment that makes her wonder if she’s really as prepared as she thinks. Meanwhile, Maggie opens up about whether she was ready, and the ever-changing question of whether she wants more kids down the line.
Together, they explore how social media has turned parenthood into a performance, why “perfectly prepared” is often a myth, and why maybe “ready” isn’t about having it all sorted - but about having love, resilience, and the willingness to figure it out as you go.
Because when it comes to babies, the truth is: no one has all the answers, but everyone has a story.
CHAPTERS:
00:28 – Are We Ever Ready for Kids?
00:56 – Clocks, Chaos & Chocolate YoGo
03:29 – The Fertility Stats No One Wants to Hear
06:17 – Emotional Readiness or Houseplant Energy?
08:10 – Money vs Motherhood
08:43 – Tick Tock, Baby Clock
10:12 – Maggie’s Surprise Story
17:47 – Tully’s Baby Fever
30:29 – What Kids Really Need
34:03 – Homework: Readiness Reality Check
35:35 – Tinder’s Double Date Drama
41:03 – Overrated or Underrated
49:02 – Friendship on the Rocks
If you enjoyed your Self Help(ed) session today, please hit subscribe, leave us a glowing review and follow us on socials at @selfhelpedpod.
You can find Maggie online at @maggiekellywriter and Tully over on @tee_smyth.
New episodes dropping every Thursday. #SelfHelpedPod
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42:43
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42:43
Internet Face vs. Real Face: Who Are We Even Anymore?
This week on Self Help(ed), Maggie brings a big one to the therapy couch: Internet Face. You know the one- the airbrushed, filter-heavy, best-angle-only version of ourselves that’s quietly become the new normal. From ‘bad angles on tv’ spirals to Botox confessions and the constant tug-of-war between how we think we look and how we really look.
Why are women chasing their filtered selves in real life? When did aging become something we’re supposed to hide away? And how do we start making peace with our unfiltered faces staring back at us? We dive into how the rise of filters, constant high-res streaming, and an online culture obsessed with “perfection” has left so many of us feeling like we’re falling short of our own fake selves.
Tully reflects on what it’s like to have had a camera pointed at her since she was 15 - from being “discovered” in the Girlfriend Model Search, to Big Brother, to over a decade of selfies on Instagram - and why even now she still struggles to resist the edit button.
Together, they explore how Internet Face can feel empowering in the moment but often morphs into self-surveillance, why women are starting to feel pressure to look like their filtered selves offline, and how hard it can be to make peace with the natural process of aging.
It’s a raw, funny and deeply relatable conversation about worth, filters, and the radical idea of letting your “bad angles” live. Because growing older is a privilege, and maybe the most rebellious thing we can do is love our Real Face exactly as it is.
CHAPTERS:
01:12 – Armchair Therapy Begins
02:13 – Defining Internet Face
08:22 – The Feminist Struggle With Ageing
14:08 – The Beauty Trap
18:19 – Mummy Makeovers & Moving the Goalposts
22:54 – Exposure Therapy For Ageing
27:00 – The Girls Remove The Masks
32:18 – Self Help(ed) Scoop of the Week
35:07 – Baby Name Notes App Game
If you enjoyed your Self Help(ed) session today, please hit subscribe, leave us a glowing review and follow us on socials at @selfhelpedpod.
You can find Maggie online at @maggiekellywriter and Tully over on @tee_smyth.
New episodes dropping every Thursday. #SelfHelpedPod
This podcast episode is brought to you by Go-To: quality, effective skincare that actually works.
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42:48
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42:48
Better Late Than Never (ADHD at 37)
Tully’s never been one to keep secrets- especially not on a podcast built on oversharing. But since January, she’s been sitting on one. And it’s life-changing.
In this episode, she finally opens up about her late ADHD diagnosis. Like so many women, her journey began with self-diagnosis- TikTok rabbit holes, highlighted self-help books, apps like InFlow, and those lightbulb moments listening to friends. A professional assessment later confirmed what she already suspected.
But what does it mean to get this kind of diagnosis in your late thirties, just when you think you’ve figured life out? Tully and Maggie unpack the rise of late ADHD diagnoses in women, the role of social media as both a lifeline and an overload, and why Tully kept it private until now.
They explore how the label has reframed her past, reshaped her present, and shifted how she sees herself moving forward. It’s candid, messy, and deeply relatable- because sometimes the biggest breakthrough isn’t a hack or trick.
It’s finally giving yourself permission to see who you really are.
CHAPTERS:
01:13 – Weekend Recap
02:10 – The Strapless Bra Saga
04:48 – The Reveal
06:07 – Why I Kept It Private (Until Now)
07:27 – Getting the Diagnosis
09:36 – Relief… and Grief
11:18 – “Too Much” Reconsidered
16:24 – The Inner Critic
18:59 – What Masking Looked Like
19:13 – Late ADHD in Women
22:54 – To Medicate or Not?
34:50 – Therapy Homework
36:09 – Scoop of the Week
39:06 – Exit Interviews
ADHD RESOURCES:
Read
“The Year I Met My Brain” by Matilda Boseley
“Now It All Makes Sense” by Alex Partridge
Listen:
CLOUD by Life Uncut Production
ADHD Besties Podcast
Download:
Inflow - Manage your ADHD
Follow:
@adhd_couple
@future.adhd
@adhd_chatter_
@superskillsadhd
@sarahkellyadhdcoach
@speakadhd
@coachingwithbrooke
@adhd_empowerment_coaching
If you enjoyed your Self Help(ed) session today, please hit subscribe, leave us a glowing review and follow us on socials at @selfhelpedpod.
You can find Maggie online at @maggiekellywriter and Tully over on @tee_smyth.
New episodes dropping every Thursday. #SelfHelpedPod
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45:27
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45:27
The Self-Improvement Epidemic
Our very special SELFHELPED promotion is limited to 20% off Very Luxe Face Cream when you spend $25 AUD or more at gotoskincare.com using the exclusive promo code!
Tired? Same. Women today are immersed in self-improvement culture, driven by social media and wellness trends promising endless transformation.
From cold plunges to productivity hacks, the chase for a “better” self never stops. For some, it’s empowering: access to therapy, financial tools, and wellness has never been greater, and the language of “boundaries,” “manifestation,” and “side hustles” is now everyday. Yet the pressure to optimise everything can be draining, turning love and hobbies into boxes to tick.
Still, this movement has opened space for vital conversations about money, burnout, and mental health, all while raising the challenge of balancing growth with self-acceptance.
Where do you stand in the Self-Improvement Epidemic?
CHAPTERS:
00:50 — Hat Chat: Easter Bonnet energy, Jamiroquai vibes
01:49 — Staycay Diaries
03:10 — Red Hill Romantics
04:28 — Goldfish Brains
06:58 — On The Couch: Are we in a self-improvement epidemic
10:03 — Homework Hangover
16:26 — Maggie’s Greatest Hits: Ecstatic dance and hug therapy horrors
20:59 — Tully’s Toolbox: Kinesiology and a crystal in the clutch
22:25 — Red Flags in Wellness
25:02 — Actual Keepers
26:28 — Enoughness Moment
27:32 — Rest Without Permission
28:24 — Therapy Notes
34:32 — Listener Homework
36:47 — Scoop of the Week: Swift engagement
40:19 — Why We Care
44:27 — Saved and Shamed
If you enjoyed your Self Help(ed) session today, please hit subscribe, leave us a glowing review and follow us on socials at @selfhelpedpod.
You can find Maggie online at @maggiekellywriter and Tully over on @tee_smyth.
New episodes dropping every Thursday. #SelfHelpedPod
This podcast episode is brought to you by Go-To: quality, effective skincare that actually works.
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48:36
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48:36
The Hyper-Independence Hangover
After years of “doing it all” - careers, crises, and the day-to-day grind - Tully and Maggie have mastered the art of hyper-independence. But here’s the thing: once you get used to carrying everything alone, it’s hard to let anyone else take the weight… even when someone wants to.
In this episode, the girls dig into the emotional gymnastics of refusing help until they inevitably explode - or, as Maggie puts it, become “champagne bottles that get shaken up until they pop.”
They talk about the messy reality of vulnerability when it’s not cute, the ugly side of mental health, and the awkward dance between self-reliance and letting people in.
Whether you’re an A-type personality with a colour-coded calendar or just someone who hates asking for help, this one will feel uncomfortably familiar.
01:05 – Sock Merch & Chart Bragging
01:30 – Weekly Life Chaos
04:30 – On the Couch: Hyper-Independence
13:00 – Teenager to Caretaker
17:00 – Champagne Bottle Analogy
20:00 – Ned the Golden Retriever Boyfriend
22:00 – Ugly Cry + Guilt Spiral
25:00 – Microdosing Vulnerability & Asking For Help
29:00 – TeaOnHer: Are we hypocrites?
33:00 – Digital Overshare Trauma
35:00 – Shag V. Taylor Swift
39:00 – Troll Dolls & Bridges
42:00 – Therapy Homework
If you enjoyed your Self Help(ed) session today, please hit subscribe, leave us a glowing review and follow us on socials at @selfhelpedpod.
You can find Maggie online at @maggiekellywriter and Tully over on @tee_smyth.
New episodes dropping every Thursday.
#SelfHelpedPod
This podcast episode is brought to you by Go-To: quality, effective skincare that actually works.
A brand new podcast hosted by writers and best friends, Maggie Kelly & Tully Smyth.
"We've done the therapy, so you don't have to."
Modern women are done with hiding. Divorce, infertility, fledgling careers, single parenthood - the so-called taboos of female ‘failure’ are quickly becoming our favourite topics. Why? Because we’ve all been there.
Under the glossy exterior of success, we’re all just trying to dodge the demands: be sexy, be smart, be brave, be a wife, be a mother, be a feminist, be fit, be fun… but don’t talk about it. We’re burning down the facade and telling it like it is.
Self Help(ed) is where those stories live - unfiltered, hilarious, vulnerable and real. Each episode dives into the messiness of modern womanhood with honesty, humour and hindsight. It’s second-hand therapy, the space we wish we had during our hardest chapters… and now, it’s yours too.
This is, Self Help(ed).
If you enjoyed your Self Help(ed) session today, please hit subscribe, leave us a glowing review and follow us on Instagram at @selfhelpedpod, TikTok at @selfhelpedpod or YouTube.
You can follow Maggie online at @maggiekellywriter and Tully over on @tee_smyth.
New episodes dropping every Thursday.
New Zealand