Living Easy with Lindsey

What happens when a marriage slowly drifts into loneliness, betrayal, and eventually divorce? And can God really restore something that broken?
In this episode of Living Easy with Lindsey, Lindsey Maestas talks with author and marriage mentor Cheryl Scruggs about the painful season that led to an affair, the divorce that followed, and the unexpected seven-year journey that eventually led Cheryl and her husband Jeff back to each other.
Cheryl shares honestly about feeling deeply alone in her marriage, the choices that led to brokenness, and the personal and spiritual transformation that made reconciliation possible. Their story is a powerful reminder that even when a marriage feels beyond repair, redemption is still possible.
Resources
Cheryl Scruggs https://jeffandcherylscruggs.com
I Do Again: How We Found a Second Chance at Our Marriage https://www.amazon.com/Do-Again-Second-Chance-Marriage/dp/1400074452
Lindsey's Book
Don't Burn Your Own House Down: Prioritizing Your Marriage, Your Spouse, and Yourself  https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Burn-Your-House-Down/dp/0310369479
If this episode encouraged you, please subscribe, rate, and review on Spotify and/or Apple Podcasts so that more people can find these conversations! 
Follow Lindsey on Instagram for daily encouragement on faith, marriage, and intentional living.

Have you ordered, rated, and reviewed my new book, "Don't Burn Your Own House Down: Prioritizing Your Marriage, Your Spouse, and Yourself for a Deeper Connection"? If not, please take a second to do so!! If you've ever enjoyed my content, this is the greatest way that you could support me right now! THANK YOU! 

Change is expensive, but won't staying cost you even more? 

What if the reason you feel stuck, drained, or unhappy isn't because your life is hard, but because you've been "adding sugar" to what's actually bitter?
In this episode, Lindsey Maestas shares what she calls the "Black Coffee Theory": a simple but transformative mindset shift that has changed the way she approaches relationships, work, habits, and her spiritual life.
The concept is this: the happiest, most successful, most grounded people don't add sugar to things that are already bitter. They're honest with themselves that it's bitter, and they put the cup down.
They don't distort reality to make something tolerable, they don't romanticize what hurts, and they don't convince themselves something is good just because they're afraid of what honesty might require.
The Psychology 
This episode also explores the research behind why we do this in the first place:
Cognitive Dissonance When our reality conflicts with our identity or beliefs, we feel internal tension. Instead of changing the situation, we often change the story.
The Sunk Cost Fallacy We stay in situations because we've already invested so much — time, emotion, reputation, or faith — and leaving feels more painful than tolerating.
Emotional Suppression and Resentment Research shows that consistently overriding internal signals leads to emotional exhaustion, resentment, and anxiety. When we ignore what drains us, our body and nervous system keep the score.


Isaiah 5:20 warns: "Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter."
Reflection Questions
Where am I adding "sugar" in my life right now?
How can I be more honest with myself about what I want out of life?
Am I enduring something that is refining me or am I tolerating something that is draining me?
What would it look like to tell the truth about this situation before God?

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Follow along with me on Instagram: @livingeasywithlindsey

In this heartfelt, faith-centered episode, Lindsey Maestas and Lenya Heitzig have a powerful conversation inspired by Sheologie's core message of "calling women up, not out": a reminder that growth happens through truth and not shame.

P.S. Have you read my new book, Don't Burn Your Own House Down, yet?! We are still in launch month so EVERY bit of support from this community helps!! I have a goal of selling 120 books this week!!

If you're single or engaged, this book will prepare your heart for marriage. If you've been married for 1-50 years, I wrote this book to help you become more intentional with your time and energy toward the most important relationship in your life! 

Please gift it to a friend and share on social, and once you've read it, please put your review on Amazon, Barnes & Target! Every bit helps. 
In this conversation with Lenya, we explore how our thoughts shape who we become, why people-pleasing often disguises itself as love, and how emotional overfunctioning can hinder us from trusting God in our relationships.
If you ever find yourself trying to control outcomes, rescue others, or manage everyone's emotions, it's easy to create pressure rather than peace. 
Lindsey and Lenya discuss how:
What you think about consistently shapes who you are becoming

People pleasing can turn into trying to save someone who isn't even willing to save themselves

Overhelping friends can actually interrupt what Jesus is trying to teach them

Emotional triggers in marriage don't have to explode into conflict, they can be gently deconstructed

Therapy, self-awareness, and faith can work together in healing

Differences in marriage don't have to collide, they can become places of laughter, humility, and compromise

Fear can cause us to "lasso" our spouse and limit the very growth God is inviting them into

This episode is for the woman who feels responsible for everyone's well-being, who carries anxiety about her marriage, or who struggles to release control and trust God with the people she loves most.
I pray you walk away with a clearer understanding of emotional boundaries, spiritual surrender, and how to stop trying to be the Holy Spirit in someone else's life.

Learn more about Reload Love here!

IT'S RELEASE DAY!!! Don't Burn Your Own House Down is officially out in the world! For this special day, Jesse asked if he could sit down and interview me about the real story behind the book… and our marriage. 
We talk honestly about the habits and patterns that created distance between us. We discuss the stories of others' that are a big part of this book (and the title).
This conversation is about the reality that marriage doesn't just happen and stay great on its own. It takes intention. It takes humility. It takes learning how to repair when you've hurt each other. And it takes choosing an eternal perspective, to keep Jesus as the foundation, and choosing one another even when your feelings are all over the place.
I also share the core moment that made me feel like I had to write this book, the chapters that were the most personal for me, and what I believe is the one place couples can start if they want to begin reconnecting.
This isn't about being the "perfect couple." It's about being two people who are ready to learn how to stop drifting and start building again.


About the Book
Don't Burn Your Own House Down is about recognizing the small patterns that slowly erode connection in your marriage. I speak on modern issues in modern marriages, like social media, p*rnography, comparison, spiritual disconnection, emotional labor, marital financial struggles, and much more.
I give practical tools, along with my own vulnerable stories, to help you to rebuild emotional safety, communication, and closeness in a practical, honest way.
Don't Burn Your Own House Down is for new couples who want to prepare their hearts for a godly marriage. Couples who don't want to give up, but know something needs to change. Couples who have been married for 50 years but feel like their love has disappeared. Couples with newborns or a difficult family life who just need some reprieve and support. No matter what season you're in, this book is for YOU.


📘 Get the Book
Don't Burn Your Own House Down is officially out today!!!! 
If this episode resonated with you in any way, or if you've ever been helped by my content, the book goes deeper into the practical and emotional work of reconnecting in marriage.
👉 Grab your copy here! 


⭐ A Quick Favor That Makes a Huge Difference
If you get a copy of the book and it blesses you, would you take 60 seconds to leave a review?! Reviews during launch month help more than most people realize! They help the message reach couples who are quietly struggling and searching for hope.
You can leave a review here: Amazon Barnes & Noble Target

Thank you for being part of this with me. Truly!! 
💛 Come Say Hi
I'd love to hear from you!! Follow along with me on IG! 
Instagram: @livingeasywithlindsey

My book, Don't Burn Your Own House Down: Prioritizing Your Marriage, Your Spouse, and Yourself for a Deeper Connection, will be here in ONE WEEK. (AHHH!!!) Please pre-order today!!! 

Barnes & Noble: Buy from B&N! (Preferred
Target: Buy from Target! (Preferred
Amazon: Buy on Amazon!
Did you know that 41% of first marriages and 60% of second marriages end in divorce? And even higher numbers are reportedly completely dissatisfied in their marriages.

In today's episode, I'm diving into the four silent killers that quietly lead couples toward disconnection, resentment, and ultimately divorce. These issues show up in nearly every modern marriage, Christian or non, and they often go unnoticed until the relationship feels distant or broken. 
You can only live like ships passing in the night until something inevitably breaks.
My prayer is that this conversation gives you the clarity, conviction, and practical encouragement you need to build a healthier, more connected, and more Christ‑centered marriage — one that resists emotional disconnection, strengthens communication, and protects your relationship from drifting toward divorce.
If you've ever enjoyed The Living Easy Podcast, my Instagram posts, or my blog… the single most supportive thing you can do is to preorder Don't Burn Your Own House Down! It means the world to me, and it allows me to continue creating content that serves marriages and families with honesty, faith, and practical wisdom. THANK YOU! 

Please share this episode with a friend, leave a review on Apple Podcasts, or tag me on Instagram @livingeasywithlindsey.