ADHDifference

Julie Legg speaks with psychotherapist Karen Dwyer-Tesoriero, who specialises in adult ADHD, complex trauma, and attachment. With over 25 years in social work and psychotherapy, Karen brings both professional expertise and lived experience to the conversation after discovering her own ADHD later in life through her son’s diagnosis.
Together, they discuss powerful overlap between ADHD and trauma, particularly how negative childhood messaging can evolve into legacy burdens that shape adult identity, attachment styles, perfectionism, and people-pleasing. Karen unpacks how rejection sensitivity can be mislabelled as personality disorder, how masking impacts women especially, and how internalised “I’m not good enough” narratives quietly drive anxiety and depression.
Key Points from the Episode:
Discovering ADHD later in life through a child’s diagnosis
Masking in women and the “talks too much” childhood narrative
ADHD and complex trauma: where they overlap
Rejection sensitivity vs borderline personality misdiagnosis
How negative childhood messages become “legacy burdens”
Perfectionism and people-pleasing as trauma responses
Attachment styles in ADHD relationships
The role of nervous system regulation in healing
Using EMDR and Internal Family Systems to untangle beliefs
Why “normal” and “perfect” don’t actually exist
Building evidence for “I am good enough”
A daily mantra: Dare to believe in yourself
Links:
WEBSITE: https://www.kdtesorierolcsw.net/
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/kdtesorierolcsw
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/kdtesorierolcsw.net/ 
LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karen-dwyer-tesoriero-lcsw-emdr-certified-411316a1/
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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
📖 BOOK: The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD
ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg chats with Douglas Katz — West Point graduate, Army veteran, inventor — about receiving an ADHD diagnosis in his 50s and how that moment reframed his entire life. Rather than seeing ADHD as something to “manage” or suppress, Douglas began to recognise how his urgency-driven thinking, rapid problem-solving, and constant scanning for stimuli had actually fuelled his success in the military and entrepreneurship. What once felt like quirks or liabilities became strategic advantages in the right environments.
From inventing adaptive tools inspired by his own physical limitations (such as his NULU knife), to embracing what he calls “Forrest Gumping” (allowing ideas to flow rather than forcing control) Douglas shares how understanding his brain allowed him to build a life based on ability rather than disability.
This conversation is a reminder that adult diagnosis is not an ending. It is often the beginning of self-acceptance, recalibration, and unlocking a different lens on success.
Key Points in the Episode:
Receiving an ADHD diagnosis in his 50s and the surprising sense of validation
Why military and startup environments can reward ADHD traits
The difference between managing ADHD and positioning yourself strategically
Reframing “disability” into contextual mismatch
The power of building a complementary team as an entrepreneur
“Forrest Gumping” — letting ideas flow instead of forcing control
Why intention is the most misunderstood ADHD trait
How adult diagnosis can become a turning point rather than a setback
Makers vs consumers — why producing creates regulation
Viewing ADHD as a superpower when aligned with the right environment
Links:
DOUGLAS KATZ: https://linktr.ee/dougkatz
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/d.m.katz/
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/DOUGLASMKATZ/
LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/douglaskatz/
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Thanks for listening.
📌 Don’t forget to subscribe for more tools for beautifully different brains.
🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
📖 BOOK: The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD
ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg is joined by Kit Slocum, neurodiversity lead and learning experience designer at Flown. With a background in psychology and behavioural neuroscience, and lived experience of ADHD, Kit brings both science and compassion to the conversation about focus, productivity, and nervous system regulation.
From going from failing grades to straight A’s after receiving accommodations, to questioning the systems that label distraction as a personal flaw, Kit reframes ADHD through the lens of nervous system science and the neurodiversity paradigm. She explains why modern environments are fundamentally overstimulating, why burnout is often the predictable result, and how small, intentional shifts can radically change how ADHDers experience work and life.
This episode offers insight into body doubling, nervous system check-ins, structured flexibility, and how leaders can design workplaces that actually support neurodivergent brains rather than forcing them to adapt.
Key Points from the Episode:
Kit’s journey from academic struggle to thriving with accommodations
The shift from the pathology paradigm to the neurodiversity paradigm
Why distraction is often a dysregulated nervous system, not laziness
How modern over-stimulation keeps ADHD brains in “on” mode
Burnout as the end result of chronic nervous system activation
Nervous system check-ins and micro-regulation strategies
Why many productivity apps fail ADHDers
Creating a personalised “toolbox” through experimentation
Designing workplaces around curiosity and structured flexibility
The Neural Passport: communicating how you work best
Body doubling as a powerful focus strategy
The importance of language — disability, difference, or superpower?
Community as the most powerful ADHD tool of all
Links:
WEBSITE: https://flown.com/
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/flownspace/
LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/company/flown/
ADHD MASTERY PROGRAM: https://flown.com/adhd-focus-program
Send a text
Thanks for listening.
📌 Don’t forget to subscribe for more tools for beautifully different brains.
🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
📖 BOOK: The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD
ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg sits down with clinical psychologist Dr. Matt Campbell, co-creator of the Our Primal Five framework, to explore why self-care feels so hard especially for ADHDers and why the basics matter more than we realise.
Rather than promoting productivity hacks or aesthetic routines, Matt brings the conversation back to foundational human needs: sleep, sunlight, movement, social connection, and mindful consumption. He explains how modern life constantly pulls us away from these essentials, and why structure, not motivation, is the real key to sustainable change.
This episode is a great reminder that self-care isn’t indulgence. It’s replenishment. And for ADHD brains in particular, small, structured, repeatable shifts can be far more transformative than grand, short-lived resolutions.
Key Points from the Episode:
Why “knowing” what to do doesn’t automatically lead to “doing” it
The difference between motivation and structure, and why structure wins
Why ADHDers struggle with the basics like sleep, hygiene, and routine
How perfectionism and all-or-nothing thinking sabotage change
Why guilt and self-criticism actually block behaviour change
The concept of Our Primal Five: sleep, sunlight, movement, social connection, and consumption
How stacking habits makes change sustainable
Why exercise can rival antidepressants for mood regulation
The hidden cost of digital “junk” consumption — social media, news, and overstimulation
The power of understanding ADHD to dismantle narratives of laziness or failure
Sustainable self-care as structure, not indulgence
Links:
WEBSITE: https://www.ourprimal5.com/
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/ourprimal5
LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/matt-campbell-a5b22910/
WORKBOOK: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FQWSX73R?tag=ourprimal5-20 
NEWSLETTER: https://our-primal-5.kit.com/9b41ee5325
Send a text
Thanks for listening.
📌 Don’t forget to subscribe for more tools for beautifully different brains.
🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
📖 BOOK: The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD
ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg speaks with registered therapeutic counsellor Ariel-Paul Saunders, who brings a relational, intergenerational lens to understanding ADHD. Diagnosed at 38, Ariel began questioning the traditional medical narrative after recognising that his most significant struggles with focus and regulation didn’t begin in childhood, but emerged following a major relational rupture in early adulthood.
Together, Julie and Ariel explore ADHD not just as a fixed neurological condition, but as something shaped by attachment patterns, nervous system regulation, and family lineage. From wartime trauma passed down through generations to the orchid-and-dandelion analogy of sensitivity, this conversation reframes ADHD as a developmental journey rather than a personal defect.
It’s an episode about compassion for ourselves, our parents, and our children, and about becoming the generation that transforms what gets passed forward.
Key Points from the Episode
Why Ariel’s ADHD symptoms intensified after a relational rupture in his early 20s
What felt incomplete about the traditional medical explanation of ADHD
The role of nervous system regulation in how ADHD presents
Attachment, safety, and how connection shapes focus and executive function
The “orchid vs dandelion” analogy for sensitivity and environmental fit
How trauma and emotional numbing can be passed down without intention
Reframing ADHD as lineage rather than personal failure
How understanding our parents changes how we understand ourselves
Supporting children by seeing the state beneath the behaviour
Growing through ADHD traits, not necessarily “out of” them
Becoming the generation that shifts relational patterns forward
Links
FREE CONSULTATION: https://securelythriving.com/book-a-call
FREE RESOURCE: https://securelythriving.com/free-resource
ARTICLE: Why-my-adhd-didnt-appear-until-age-21
ARTICLE: The Neuroscience of How Attachment Shapes ADHD: From Dopamine to Executive Function
ARTICLE: Three Generations of ADHD
INSTAGRAM: @securelythrivingfamily
FACEBOOK: @securelythriving
LINKEDIN: Ariel-Paul Saunders
YOUTUBE: @securelythriving

Send a text
Thanks for listening.
📌 Don’t forget to subscribe for more tools for beautifully different brains.
🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
📖 BOOK: The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD
ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More