How To Love Yourself No Matter What

Today I’m talking about something I see constantly in women who are overwhelmed, emotionally reactive, anxious, or stuck in survival mode: the inability to slow down and be alone with themselves.
So many of us are constantly doing. Working, parenting, helping everyone else, consuming self-help, listening to podcasts, journaling, trying to improve ourselves, trying to stay productive — and while none of those things are bad, eventually we lose our connection to ourselves.
In this episode, I’m talking about:
Why constant doing can keep us emotionally dysregulated
What emotional reactivity actually is
How fear of feeling keeps us stuck in fight, flight, freeze, and fawn
Why silence feels uncomfortable for so many women
The importance of emotional safety and nervous system regulation
How to build the ability to feel emotions without becoming consumed by them
Small ways to slow down and reconnect with yourself throughout your day

This episode is a reminder that healing is not always about doing more. Sometimes it’s about creating enough space to finally hear yourself again.
Key Takeaways
Emotional reactivity isn’t just about outward behaviour — it’s when emotions are running your internal experience.
Many women stay busy because being alone with themselves feels unsafe.
Constant input and productivity can disconnect us from our bodies and nervous systems.
Fear of emotion creates chronic fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses.
Emotional safety is something we can build over time.
Small moments of silence and grounding matter more than you think.
Healing is not about white-knuckling your way through life.

Quotes From This Episode
“All of your life is not a doing problem. It’s a being problem.”“The more emotionally safe you feel, the more able you are to allow emotion.”“If everything you do is designed to get rid of emotion, you’re going to live in fear.”“We live in a society that is perpetually inputting into us — and we never give ourselves space to release it.”“Silence is a skill. Being alone with yourself is a skill.”Call to Action
If this episode resonated with you and you’re realizing how much of your life has been spent in survival mode, I’d love to support you.
You can book a free discovery call at:
👉 amandahess.ca/bookacall
Together, we can look at what’s keeping you emotionally stuck, how to create more emotional safety, and whether coaching is the right next step for you.

Let me tell you, if you’ve ever felt like you just can’t shake off a past hurt, you’re in for a treat. We’re diving into the fascinating world of trauma—what it really is and why it affects us all differently. I’m talking about the sneaky ways that emotional pain can manifest in our daily lives, from the tone of someone’s voice to the way silence can feel like a punch in the gut. It turns out that our brains are wired to keep us safe, but sometimes, they misinterpret signals and lead us down a rabbit hole of anxiety and fear. We’ll unpack why trying to simply ‘think’ your way out of it is like trying to use a spoon to dig a hole—it’s just not going to work! Instead, I’ll share some insights on how to work with your nervous system to create a sense of safety and stability in your life. Plus, I’ve got a brand new free class coming up that’s perfect for anyone feeling stuck in the cycle of overthinking. It’s time to learn how to prioritize your feelings without guilt and start living a ‘fuck yes’ life—one that’s truly yours!
Takeaways:
You might think you're overreacting, but your brain is just processing trauma differently than others.
Replaying conversations is not a flaw; it’s your brain's way of trying to create safety after emotional pain.
Feeling anxious or reactive isn't a logic issue; it's a feelings problem that needs to be addressed with care.
It's crucial to realize that your needs are just as important as everyone else's, not optional.
Suppressing emotions only makes things worse; you need to learn how to process feelings effectively.
A 'fuck yes' life is about prioritizing your own desires and needs, not waiting for others to validate you.

Links referenced in this episode:
amandahest.ca/bookacall

Alright friend, grab your gardening gloves because today we’re talking about something really important: how to create a life that actually blooms.
The biggest takeaway from this episode?
I think we spend way too much time pulling weeds and not nearly enough time planting flowers.
You know how in spring we clean out our gardens? We pull out the dead stuff, clear the weeds, make space for something new. I really think we need to do the same thing mentally and emotionally too.
So many women are walking around completely focused on what’s wrong. What’s wrong with them. What’s wrong with their relationship. Their body. Their job. Their life. And while yes — sometimes we absolutely do need to deal with the weeds — I don’t think healing is supposed to just be endless weeding.
At some point, we also have to plant flowers.
In this episode, I talk about:
Why constantly “fixing yourself” can actually keep you stuck
The difference between pulling weeds and creating beauty
Nervous system regulation that actually feels supportive and doable
Why pleasure matters more than most women realize
How kindness, rest, joy, and unconditional love change your life
Why so many women are burned out from trying to hold too many plates
How to start creating a life that feels full instead of just managed

I also share why figure skating is one of the biggest nervous system regulators in my own life, and why the things that light you up emotionally are not frivolous — they’re necessary.
This episode is really an invitation to stop living in constant maintenance mode and start intentionally creating a life you actually want to be inside of.
Because the truth is:
If all we ever do is pull weeds, we end up exhausted.
But when we start planting flowers?
Everything changes. 🌸
Want to talk to me directly? Book a free discovery call here:
amandahess.ca/bookacall

If you’ve been repeating affirmations, journaling your thoughts, and still feeling stuck… we need to talk.
Because it’s not that you’re doing it wrong.
It’s that these tools aren’t actually designed to create the kind of change you’re looking for.
In this episode, I’m breaking down why mantras and journaling often don’t work—especially for sensitive, self-aware women—and what to do instead.
Mantras can create internal conflict when your brain doesn’t believe what you’re saying.
Journaling can turn into rumination that reinforces the exact patterns you’re trying to break.
So if you’ve ever felt like:
“I should be further along by now”
“I know better, so why am I still stuck?”
“I’ve done so much work, why hasn’t anything really changed?”
This episode will land.
I’m going to show you a different way to work with your brain—one that actually creates emotional buy-in, shifts your beliefs, and changes how you show up in your life.
✨ In This Episode, I Talk About:
Why mantras often feel empty (and can actually increase anxiety)
How journaling can quietly reinforce negative thinking patterns
The role your survival brain is playing behind the scenes
Why your beliefs—not your thoughts—are what need to change
The real skill that creates confidence, calm, and lasting change
How asking better questions can completely shift your emotional state

🔑 What I Want You To Take Away:
You don’t need to force yourself to think positively.
You need to learn how to question what you’re thinking in a way that actually opens something up.
💭 Try This Instead:
Next time you feel stuck, don’t reach for a mantra.
Ask yourself:
What if this isn’t actually true?
What would be possible if I believed I was enough?
How would I show up if I felt fully accepted?

Let your brain answer. That’s where the shift happens.
💬 Want Help With This?
This is exactly the work I do with my clients.
If you’re ready to stop spinning in your head and actually create change that feels real and sustainable, you can book a call with me:
👉 amandahess.ca/bookacall
📲 Come Say Hi
If this episode resonated, DM me on Instagram or TikTok. I’d love to hear what landed for you.
Links referenced in this episode:
amandahessbookacall
theamandahess

If you’ve ever thought “why am I so emotional?” or felt like you’re just too sensitive for this world, this episode is going to shift everything.
Because what if the problem isn’t your emotions…
but what you’ve been taught to believe about them?
In this episode, I’m breaking down the hidden conditioning that makes sensitive women feel weak, overwhelmed, or “too much”—and why that narrative is not only false, it’s keeping you stuck.
We’ll talk about:
Why being emotional has been framed as a flaw
How society profits from you believing something is wrong with you
The real reason you feel overwhelmed, reactive, or “too much”
Why trying to fix yourself is making things worse
The powerful shift from problem-focused → desire-led living
How to start trusting your sensitivity instead of fighting it

If you’re a deeply feeling, intuitive woman who’s tired of trying to be less…
this is your permission slip to stop.
🎧 What You’ll Walk Away With
A completely new way to understand your emotional experience
Relief from the belief that you’re “too much” or broken
A starting point for working with your sensitivity instead of against it
A powerful reframe that opens the door to more peace, energy, and self-trust

💬 Ready to Go Deeper?
If this episode hit home and you’re ready to stop overthinking, people-pleasing, and feeling stuck in your own emotions…
Book a free discovery call with me:
👉 https://amandahess.ca/book-a-call
We’ll talk about what’s going on for you and map out what real support could look like.
🔁 Share This Episode
Know someone who feels like they’re “too emotional” or struggles with sensitivity?
Send this to her. It might be exactly what she needs to hear.