How To Love Yourself No Matter What

I turned 50 this week.
And I’ll be honest — this birthday feels different.
There’s awareness.
There’s fear.
There’s grief.
And there’s a level of self-trust I would have begged for in my twenties.
In this episode, I’m starting a 5-part series sharing 50 things I know at 50 about being a sensitive woman in 2026 — not just how to survive, but how to thrive.
Today, I’m giving you the first 10.
These are the foundational lessons — the ones about your nervous system, your emotions, your responsibility, and your capacity.
Because if you don’t understand how you’re wired, you will misunderstand your entire life.
In This Episode, I Cover:
Why sensitivity is not a flaw (even if it’s been treated like one)
How your nervous system drives your reactions
Why emotions are messengers — not problems
The difference between regulation and suppression
Why other people are not responsible for your feelings
How to stop fucking yourself over
Why joy must be cultivated
How to move with fear instead of shrinking from it
Why friendship takes work (especially at midlife)
What loving yourself actually requires
Why focusing on what you want MORE of changes everything

Key Takeaway
Being a sensitive woman in 2026 is not about hardening yourself.
It’s about building emotional capacity.
It’s about regulating your nervous system instead of reacting from it.
It’s about becoming unwilling to betray yourself.
Turning 50 hasn’t made me less sensitive.
It’s made me more skilled.
And skill changes everything.
Continue the Series
This is Part 1 of a 5-part birthday series:
50 Things I Know at 50 About Being a Sensitive Woman in 2026
Stay tuned for Part 2 next week.
Connect With Me
If this episode resonated, I’d love to hear from you.
Send me a message on Instagram: @theamandahess
Or visit www.amandahess.ca to learn more about working together.

If you’ve been trying to “fix” yourself for years… this episode might change everything.
So much of the emotional wellness space is focused on one thing:
Getting rid of what’s wrong.
The anxiety.
The stress.
The overthinking.
The guilt.
The burnout.
The trauma.
And while support matters, here’s what’s missing:
You cannot build a thriving life by only trying to eliminate what hurts.
In this episode, I’m teaching a core concept I walk my private clients through — the emotional teeter-totter — and why balance, not eradication, is the real goal.
Because life is 50/50.
Your brain is wired to scan for danger.
And trying to remove every uncomfortable emotion will keep you stuck in survival mode.
Instead, we need to learn how to build the other side.
Joy.
Pleasure.
Excitement.
Belonging.
Desire.
Purpose.
When you intentionally build those, everything changes.
✨ In This Episode, We Talk About:
Why “fixing yourself” can actually make you feel worse
How self-help sometimes overemphasizes what’s broken
The 50/50 nature of emotional life (and why it’s normal)
How your primitive brain keeps you in survival mode
The emotional teeter-totter analogy that explains everything
Why eliminating stress isn’t the goal
How to build emotional capacity instead of avoidance
The difference between tolerating emotions and processing them
Why creating joy is a skill (not a luxury)
How doing hard, scary things on purpose builds empowerment
Why pleasure, excitement, and fulfillment are your responsibility

💛 The Truth
Your life won’t feel better because you finally eliminate anxiety.
It will feel better because you’ve learned how to:
Feel anxiety without collapsing
Create joy on purpose
Build balance instead of chasing perfection
Empower yourself emotionally

You don’t need to become stress-free.
You need to become emotionally stronger and more intentional about building what you want.
🌿 Want to Go Deeper?
If this resonates and you want help applying this to your real life:
📍 Book a consultation: amandahess.ca/bookacall
You don’t have to keep running on the “fixing” treadmill.
🎧 If You Loved This Episode
Share it with someone who’s tired of trying to repair themselves.
And if this podcast supports you, leaving a review helps more women find this work.

Hey my beautiful friend… I can’t believe I’m saying this, but welcome to Episode 300.
When I started this podcast, I had no idea if anyone would listen… or if I’d even keep going. But here we are — and today I want to revisit the most important message I’ve ever shared:
Loving yourself no matter what is the key to everything.
Because self-love isn’t about bubble baths or positive affirmations.
It’s about learning how to be safe with yourself.
It’s about learning how to support yourself when you’re struggling… how to regulate your nervous system… how to stop spiraling into shame… and how to stop living your life trying to earn love from everyone else.
In this episode, I’m walking you through where the message of Love Yourself No Matter What came from, why it matters so deeply, how it actually works, and how to begin implementing it in your real life — even if you feel like you’ve tried everything.
This is the foundation of emotional healing, confidence, boundaries, and true inner peace.
And if you’ve been feeling stuck, anxious, lonely, reactive, exhausted, or like something is “wrong” with you…
This episode is for you.
✨ In This Episode, We Talk About:
Why self-love is still deeply misunderstood
The difference between being loving vs. being permissive
Why so many people feel anxious, lonely, and emotionally exhausted
How perfectionism and pressure keep you stuck
My personal rock bottom — and what I was told about myself
How nervous system sensitivity can be mistaken for “something wrong with you”
Why learning to love yourself creates emotional safety
The “abused puppy” metaphor that explains healing perfectly
How self-love helps you stop procrastinating, people pleasing, and spiraling
Why your life becomes unrecognizable when you stop abandoning yourself
How to start practicing loving yourself daily (even when you don’t feel lovable)

💛 Ready to Go Deeper?
If you want support implementing this work in your life, I’d love to talk with you.
📍 Book a call here: amandahess.ca/bookacall
🎧 Loved this Episode?
If this podcast has supported you, I would be so grateful if you left a review — it helps more women find this work and start healing too.

Show notes coming soon

I’m recording this one off the cuff, because it matters.
I cry a lot. I cry every day. Sometimes I cry because I’m sad. Sometimes I cry because I’m angry, happy, proud — or because I just need to cry. I’ve always been this way, and if you’re listening to this, you probably are too.
In this episode, I talk about why crying isn’t something to fix — and why nothing has gone wrong when tears show up. We’ve been taught to feel shame or guilt when we cry, especially in front of other people, but that doesn’t mean crying is wrong. More often than not, it just means other people don’t have the tools to be with it.
This is a conversation about sensitivity, emotion, and why big girls do cry — not because we’re weak, but because we feel deeply, we care, and we’re human.
In This Episode, I Cover:
Why I cry every day — and why that’s not a problem
The shame and guilt many women feel when they cry in front of others
Why people try to fix crying instead of allowing it
How we’re taught that crying is inappropriate or “too much”
Why crying isn’t manipulative
Crying as release, connection, and a non-aggressive expression of emotion
A thought to try on: Big girls do cry — and I’m okay with myself when I do

A question to sit with:
What happens when I let myself cry without making it mean something has gone wrong?
You don’t need to answer it — just notice the urge to stop it, explain it, apologize for it, or judge yourself for it.
That noticing is the work.
If this episode brought up relief, resistance, or confusion, you’re not alone — and you don’t have to carry it by yourself.
✨ Come say hi on Instagram: @theamandahess
I’d love to hear what this stirred for you — the real, unpolished version.
If this episode resonated and you want support applying this work to your real life, I’d love to talk with you.
I currently have space in my 1:1 coaching practice.
Book a discovery call here:
👉 https://amandahess.ca/book-a-call
Stay Connected
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs to hear it.
I’ll see you next week. 💛