188. Can touch regulate emotions better than words?
When it comes to helping kids manage big emotions, we often think about what to say. But sometimes the most powerful support isn’t verbal—it’s physical.In this episode of Overpowering Emotions, Dr. Caroline Buzanko explores how safe, affectionate touch builds emotional security, reduces stress, and strengthens connection. Learn how simple, proactive physical contact like hugs, high-fives, and gentle reassurance can regulate emotions better than words ever could.This episode covers:· How touch calms the nervous system and reduces anxiety· Why proactive physical connection builds trust and emotional resilience· Practical ways to use touch to strengthen relationships· How to respect comfort zones while fostering deeper emotional connectionsHomework Ideas:✅ Proactive Connection Challenge· Give at least one extra physical touch every day (hug, high-five, hand on shoulder).· Notice emotional responses without using extra words.✅ Observe and Adjust:· Track how different kids or teens respond to different types of touch.· Respect comfort levels and ask if needed.✅ Mississippi Hugs:· Try a 6-second hug rule ("Six Mississippi's") at key moments: greeting, goodbye, before bedtime.✅ Silent Presence Practice:· Sit quietly next to a dysregulated child without speaking. Focus on calming presence and gentle proximity.Prefer to watch? Want to learn more about helping kids strengthen their emotion regulation skills and problem-solving brains while boosting their confidence, independence, and resilience? Check out my many training opportunities! https://drcarolinebuzanko.com/upcoming-events/
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187. Are kids really manipulating us—or are we reinforcing their behaviour?
Kids don’t manipulate—they learn. And often, they’re learning from us.In this episode of Overpowering Emotions, Dr. Caroline Buzanko takes a hard look at what’s really going on when adults feel “manipulated” by big emotions. Whether it’s whining, shouting, tears, or shutdowns, we unpack how reinforcement, not manipulation, shapes behavior—and what we can do to stop accidentally teaching kids to rely on emotional outbursts to get what they want.Perfect for anyone with kids or working with kids, this episode delivers:· Why kids lean on emotional reactions (and how they get reinforced)· How to stop giving mixed signals without shutting down expression· Tools to validate emotion without rewarding behavior· Consistent boundaries that build real emotional skillPrefer to WATCH?Homework IdeasAudit Your Reactions· Track one situation where a child whines, yells, or shuts down· Write down your response· Ask: Did I reinforce the behaviour? Did I validate the emotion without changing the rule?Practice Broken Record Validation· Create a go-to phrase: “I hear you. That’s frustrating.”· Repeat it calmly when pushback increases—but don’t budge on the boundary.Teach the Rules of Communication· Frontload expectations: “I don’t understand whining. Talk to me when you’re ready.”· Respond with calm consistency every time.Model Emotion OwnershipUse your own stress moments to say: “I’m feeling overwhelmed. I’m going to take a walk and come back when I’m calm.”Want to learn more about helping kids strengthen their emotion regulation skills and problem-solving brains while boosting their confidence, independence, and resilience? Check out my many training opportunities! https://drcarolinebuzanko.com/upcoming-events/
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186. Why do kids resist help?
Why do kids push back when we’re just trying to help? Why do teens dig in their heels at the simplest request? In this episode, Dr. Caroline chats about the psychology behind resistance—what it really means when children, students, or even adults reject support.We explore:• The real reason behind pushback (hint: it’s not defiance)• What “invisible support” looks like—and why it works• Why autonomy matters more than compliance• Subtle strategies to offer help without undermining confidence• How teachers, parents, and professionals can model emotional regulation without a power struggleListen in for practical ways to build trust, offer support that actually works, and create space for real emotional growth.Prefer to watch? Check it out HEREHomework IdeasWeekly Reflection Challenge:1. Identify one moment where you usually offer help.2. Ask: Is this child resisting because they feel controlled?3. Try giving two choices that lead to the same outcome.4. Use the phrase: “Let me know if you need me.”5. Watch for any shift in response. Did they engage more?Observation TaskWatch for a moment your child or student resists your suggestion.Pause. Reflect. Was it about control?Journal the interaction and how it might be reframed next time.Invisible Support Ideas – Helping Without Taking OverHere are some ideas of subtle strategies to support children and teens while respecting their independence and building confidence.🧠 EMOTIONAL SUPPORT:Sit nearby during homework time without saying anything.Bring them a cup of tea when they seem overwhelmed.Use calming tone and body language instead of trying to talk them down.Say "I'm here if you need me," then step back.🛠️ ENVIRONMENTAL SUPPORT:Create a distraction-free workspace they’ll want to be in.Loosen tight laces or prep materials subtly so they experience success.Handle background logistics quietly (e.g., prep snacks, tidy space).🗣️ COMMUNICATION SUPPORT:Ask open-ended questions: "What do you think might help right now?"Avoid directives. Use gentle prompts: "I wonder if..."Instead of correcting, circle or highlight an area for improvement.🏁 TASK SUPPORT:Handle a small errand for them when they’re visibly stressed.Model problem-solving out loud rather than instructing directly.Let them take the lead, even if it means small mistakes.Want to learn more about helping kids strengthen their emotion regulation skills and problem-solving brains while boosting their confidence, independence, and resilience? Check out my many training opportunities! https://drcarolinebuzanko.com/upcoming-events/
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185. How can we help kids overcome the “I can’t” mentality?
Today on Overpowering Emotions, Dr. Caroline speaks with Kevin Elworth, a father of five, entrepreneur, and resilience advocate, to explore how determination and mindset shape family life and personal growth. Kevin shares his journey from fostering to adoption, navigating financial and emotional challenges, and raising kids to be independent thinkers. Discover actionable strategies to help kids overcome “I can’t” mentalities, foster creativity, and redefine failure as learning opportunities. Tune in to get practical advice and inspiring stories to help guide children toward resilience and confidence.Homework IdeasBan “I Don’t Know” and “I Can’t”: Challenge yourself and kids to replace these phrases with action-oriented alternatives like “I need to research” or “How can I make this possible?”Create “Boredom Time”: Dedicate at least one afternoon per week as a no-screens, unstructured time for kids to explore their creativity.Support Goal-Setting: Help kids identify one goal they’re passionate about. Work with them to create a step-by-step plan to achieve it, teaching them to view setbacks as opportunities.Redefine Mistakes: With kids, write down recent “mistakes” and discuss what was learned from each one. Focus on the growth that came from the experience.Identify Strengths: Encourage kids to identify what they’re naturally good at and explore how they can use these strengths in creative or entrepreneurial ways.About KevinKevin Elworth is a renowned speaker who delights in making the complex simple with his storytelling style, he’s a fan of audiences everywhere who leave challenged, encouraged, and motivated in their pursuit of what comes next. His forthcoming book, Breaking the I Can’t Cycle, is sure to compel you toward your own determination and drive to accomplish more.Get in touch:FB: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=759787935Website: https://www.kevinelworth.live/Want to learn more about helping kids strengthen their emotion regulation skills and problem-solving brains while boosting their confidence, independence, and resilience? Check out my many training opportunities! https://drcarolinebuzanko.com/upcoming-events/
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184. Are you the thermostat or the thermometer in your kid’s life?
Emotions are contagious—and kids absorb others' emotions the fastest.In this episode of Overpowering Emotions, Dr. Caroline breaks down the science of emotional contagion. Learn social media’s impact on emotion regulation and why adults should consider themselves emotional thermostats (vs. thermometers). Learn how your stress, frustration, or calm directly impacts kids’ emotions, behaviour, and learning. To help kids regulate emotions, learn how to manage your emotional energy—online and offline—and help kids build emotional resilience.Topics include:Mirror neurons & emotional contagionHow adult moods shape kids environmentStrategies to model emotional regulationSocial media’s emotional rollercoasterIdeas to reset emotional energy and stop doom scrollingPrefer to WATCH?Homework IdeasTrack Your Emotional State Around Kids* Pay attention to how your mood shifts and how kids react.* Journal moments when your tone or facial expression changed the energy in the room.Practice Setting the Emotional Tone* During chaos, slow your movements and lower your voice—observe what happens.* Use eye contact and a calm, steady voice to model regulation.Teach Kids About Emotional Contagion:* Watch short videos together that elicit different emotions and talk about how it made them feel.* Ask: “Have you ever felt happier because someone smiled at you?”* Start daily check-ins: “What mood did you catch today? What was yours?”Social Media Reset* Try a 24-hour Social Media Detox—notice emotional shifts.* Curate your social feed: unfollow draining accounts, follow pages that inspire.Want to learn more about helping kids strengthen their emotion regulation skills and problem-solving brains while boosting their confidence, independence, and resilience? Check out my many training opportunities! https://drcarolinebuzanko.com/upcoming-events/
About Overpowering Emotions Podcast: Helping Children and Teens Manage Big Feels
Welcome to Overpowering Emotions with Dr. Caroline Buzanko, the podcast that empowers you to help children and teens master anxiety and other overwhelming emotions and boost their resilience. Driven by a passion to help children and teens become masters over their anxiety and other overwhelming emotions, Dr. Caroline is here to guide you on a journey of strengthening courage and resilience. In each episode, she dives into insightful conversations, practical strategies, and expert interviews to equip you with the tools and knowledge you need to help children and teens navigate their big feelings and develop emotional mastery. This podcast is your go-to resource. It's time to strengthen our collective ability to empower the younger generation. A focus on developing skills for long-term well-being is at the heart of each podcast episode. About Dr. CarolineDr. Caroline is a psychologist, mother, public speaker, and the Yoda of anxiety. With over 25 years of experience, she has dedicated her career to supporting children, teens, and their families in enhancing their lives by strengthening confidence and resilience. Her expertise is also sought after by professionals and educators looking for effective training and approaches to optimally support the children they work with. As an Assistant Professor at Athabasca University, Dr. Caroline expertly integrates evidence-based research with practical, actionable strategies. This unique approach ensures that her teachings are grounded in scientific evidence while remaining accessible and applicable to everyday situations. Through this blend of theory and practice, Dr. Caroline empowers her audience to apply these insights effectively in both clinical settings and daily interactions, significantly enhancing the outcomes for children and teens.
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