PodcastsEducationPerfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola
Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast
Latest episode

56 episodes

  • Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

    Why Traumatized Children Are Often Misunderstood

    22/05/2026 | 25 mins.
    In this solo episode of Perfect Prey, Dr. Christine Cocchiola explores the connection between coercive control, childhood trauma, attachment, and the growing number of children being diagnosed with ADHD and other behavioral disorders.

    Dr. Cocchiola challenges listeners to consider a critical question: what if many of the behaviors we label as “problematic” are actually trauma responses? What if children living within coercively controlling family systems are being misunderstood rather than truly seen?

    Drawing from the work of Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, Dr. Gabor Maté, Dr. Bruce Perry, and betrayal trauma theory, this episode examines how trauma can manifest as fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses in children — and how coercive control fractures attachment, identity, safety, and regulation.

    Dr. Cocchiola also discusses how predatory parents weaponize children, how attachment is intentionally disrupted, and why protective parents play such a critical role in healing and rebuilding safety for their children.

    What we cover
    This episode is essential listening for protective parents, clinicians, educators, advocates, and anyone trying to better understand trauma, child behavior, and coercive control.
    How trauma can mimic ADHD symptoms
    Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn trauma responses in children
    Coercive control within family systems
    How predatory parents fracture attachment intentionally
    Why dysregulated children are often misunderstood
    Attachment, authenticity, and child development
    Trauma, dissociation, and emotional regulation
    The impact of coercive control on school performance and behavior
    Why children exposed to abuse may appear oppositional or disengaged
    Protective parenting and reigniting attachment
    Broken attachment, broken safety, and “broken brain”
    How systems often pathologize traumatized children instead of protecting them
    Why listen
    If you are raising a child impacted by coercive control, navigating post-separation abuse, or working professionally with children and families, this episode offers a trauma-informed framework for understanding behavior through the lens of attachment and survival.

    Dr. Cocchiola invites listeners to shift away from asking “What’s wrong with this child?” and instead ask: “What happened to this child?”

    Connect with Dr. Christine:
    Protective Parenting Program: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/
    Dr. C’s Community: https://go.drcocchiola.com/innercirclecommunity
    Official site: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DrCocchiola-coercivecontrol/videos
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.c_coercivecontrol
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol/
    TEDxTalks: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp2qByKOue4&t=24s
    Books:
    https://url-shortener.me/c/FramedBook
    https://url-shortener.me/c/EveryMomentOfEveryDay

    If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who may need this conversation, subscribe to Perfect Prey, and leave a review — it helps other survivors and protective parents find support and validation.
    🩵
    — Dr. Christine Cocchiola
  • Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

    Why Survivors Must Be Heard to Heal with Dr. Judith Lewis Herman

    08/05/2026 | 47 mins.
    In this episode of Perfect Prey, I’m honored to be joined by Judith Herman, one of the world’s foremost pioneers in trauma research and recovery.

    Dr. Herman is the author of the groundbreaking books Father-Daughter Incest, Trauma and Recovery, and Truth and Repair—works that fundamentally changed how we understand trauma, complex trauma, institutional betrayal, and survivor healing.

    Together, we discuss the origins of trauma theory, the women’s movement that brought survivor voices into public consciousness, the devastating lifelong impact of childhood abuse and coercive control, and why children living in unsafe family systems are so deeply affected—even when the abuse is not overtly physical.

    We also explore the ACEs study, attachment, institutional failures, protective parenting, intergenerational trauma, and the critical role of safe relationships in healing.

    This is an essential conversation for survivors, clinicians, advocates, educators, attorneys, judges, and anyone seeking a deeper understanding of trauma and recovery.

    What we cover
    The origins of trauma and complex trauma theory

    How the women’s movement changed the understanding of abuse

    Dr. Herman’s groundbreaking work on incest and child sexual abuse

    The lifelong mental and physical health impacts of childhood trauma

    The ACEs study and adverse childhood experiences

    Coercive control, family violence, and child development

    Isolation as a tactic of abuse and coercive control

    Why children exposed to family violence are profoundly harmed

    Protective factors that help children heal from trauma

    Attachment, belonging, and the importance of safe relationships

    Institutional betrayal and why survivors must be heard

    Protective parenting and rebuilding connection with children

    Why listen
    If you are a survivor, protective parent, clinician, advocate, educator, researcher, or legal professional, this episode offers foundational insight into trauma, coercive control, attachment, and recovery.

    Dr. Herman’s work helped shape the modern understanding of trauma and continues to guide how we think about healing, institutional accountability, and the long-term impact of childhood abuse.

    Guest bio (short)
    Judith Herman, MD, is a psychiatrist, researcher, professor, and internationally recognized pioneer in the study of psychological trauma. She is the author of Father-Daughter Incest, Trauma and Recovery, and Truth and Repair, groundbreaking works that transformed the understanding of trauma, complex PTSD, and survivor recovery.

    About Dr. Judith Lewis Herman
    Guilford Press: https://www.guilford.com/author/Judith-Lewis-Herman?srsltid=AfmBOopF18dr2S7Z0VoukbbZiSSvNFY7XqwmoLAmoT2OykKgsoR2T4fY

    Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judith_Lewis_Herman

    Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/contributors/judith-l-herman-md

    Connect with Dr. Christine:
    Protective Parenting Program: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/
    Official site: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DrCocchiola-coercivecontrol/videos
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.c_coercivecontrol
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol/
    TEDxTalks: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp2qByKOue4&t=24s
    Books: https://url-shortener.me/c/FramedBook
    https://url-shortener.me/c/EveryMomentOfEveryDay

    If this episode landed for you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it, subscribe for more trauma-informed conversations, and consider leaving a review — it helps other survivors find validation and safety.
    🩵
    — Dr. Christine Cocchiola & guest Dr. Judith Herman
  • Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

    Greyson’s Choice: Ali Kessler’s Mission to Protect Children

    24/04/2026 | 35 mins.
    Description
    In this episode of Perfect Prey, I’m joined by Ali Kessler, founder of Greyson’s Choice, child safety advocate, and a powerful voice for prevention, awareness, and systemic change.

    Ali shares her deeply personal story of loss, resilience, and purpose—and how unimaginable grief became a mission to protect other children. Through Greyson’s Choice, Ali has transformed pain into advocacy, using her son Greyson’s legacy to create education, awareness, and meaningful change for families everywhere.

    This conversation is both heartbreaking and inspiring, highlighting what it means to carry love forward through action, courage, and protection.

    What we cover
    The story behind Greyson’s Choice

    Honoring Greyson’s legacy through advocacy

    Turning grief into purpose and prevention

    Why child safety awareness matters

    Systemic gaps that leave children vulnerable

    Supporting families after trauma and loss

    Creating change through courage and community

    Why listen
    If you are a parent, survivor, advocate, clinician, or someone navigating grief after trauma, this episode offers compassion, courage, and hope.

    Ali’s story is a reminder that even after devastating loss, love can still become action—and protection for others.

    Guest bio (short)
    Ali Kessler is the founder of Greyson’s Choice, a child safety advocacy organization created in honor of her son, Greyson. Through education, awareness, and reform efforts, she works to protect children, support families, and create lasting change in Greyson’s memory.

    Connect with Ali Kessler:
    Website: https://greysonschoice.org
    Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/greysonschoice/
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GreysonsChoice
    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/greysons-choice/posts/?feedView=all
    YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjQd87p3UbsHmUWxVkxJlUw

    Connect with Dr. Christine Cocchiola:
    Protective Parenting Program: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/
    Official site: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DrCocchiola-coercivecontrol/videos
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.c_coercivecontrol
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol/
    TEDxTalks: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp2qByKOue4&t=24s
    Books:https://url-shortener.me/c/FramedBook
    https://url-shortener.me/c/EveryMomentOfEveryDay

    If this episode landed for you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it, subscribe for more trauma-informed conversations, and consider leaving a review — it helps other survivors find validation and safety.

    🩵
    — Dr. Christine Cocchiola & guest Ali Kessler
  • Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

    Children Are Not Witnesses: The Truth About Coercive Control with Emma Katz

    10/04/2026 | 43 mins.
    Description
    In this episode of Perfect Prey, I’m joined by Emma Katz, criminologist and author of Coercive Control in Children’s and Mothers’ Lives. Emma is one of the leading researchers in the world examining how coercive control impacts children—not just as witnesses, but as direct victims navigating survival, attachment, and identity.

    Together, we explore how children experience coercive control in deeply complex ways, how abusers strategically target the mother-child bond, and why so many systems continue to misunderstand—or completely overlook—the perpetrator’s role.

    This conversation offers both profound validation and hope, highlighting the resilience of children and the critical role of protective parents in healing and recovery.

    What we cover
    Why children are not “witnesses” but direct victims of coercive control

    How perpetrators strategically target and damage the mother-child relationship

    The three ways children experience abusive fathers: dangerous, “admirable,” and omnipresent

    How manipulation, intermittent reinforcement, and fear shape children’s attachment

    Why children may align with the abusive parent—and why that is not a choice

    The psychological impact of coercive control on children’s identity, safety, and development

    The resilience of children and the power of attachment with a protective parent

    What recovery can look like for families after coercive control

    Why listen
    If you are a protective parent, survivor, clinician, or professional working with families, this episode offers essential insight into how coercive control shapes children’s experiences—and why traditional frameworks often get it wrong.

    Emma’s research brings clarity to what many families are living through, while also offering hope: children can heal, attachment can be rebuilt, and protective parenting matters more than anything.

    Guest bio (short)
    Emma Katz is a criminologist, researcher, and author specializing in coercive control and its impact on women and children. She is the author of Coercive Control in Children’s and Mothers’ Lives and writes extensively about domestic abuse, family dynamics, and systemic responses. Her work has been instrumental in shifting the understanding of children as active victims of coercive control rather than passive witnesses.

    Learn more about Dr. Emma Katz
    Substack:
    https://substack.com/@dremmakatz
    Official Site:
    https://dremmakatz.com/
    Instagram:
    https://www.instagram.com/emmakatz_phd
    LinkedIn:
    https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-emma-katz-5b911865/
    YouTube:
    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx1f7_MhfCmVufMQS0ZPRjQ
    X(twitter):
    https://x.com/DrEmmaKatzBook (Coercive Control in Children’s and Mothers’ Lives): 
    https://www.amazon.com/Coercive-Control-Childrens-INTERPERSONAL-VIOLENCE/dp/0190922214/

    Connect with Dr. Christine
    LinkedIn:
    https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-christine-marie-cocchiola-443a58204/
    Protective Parenting Program:https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/
    Official site:https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/
    YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@DrCocchiola-coercivecontrol/videos
    TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.c_coercivecontrol
    Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol/
    TEDxTalk:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp2qByKOue4&t=24s
    Books:https://url-shortener.me/c/FramedBookhttps://url-shortener.me/c/EveryMomentOfEveryDay

    If this episode landed for you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it, subscribe for more trauma-informed conversations, and consider leaving a review — it helps other survivors find validation and safety.
    🩵
    — Dr. Christine Cocchiola & guest Emma Katz
  • Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast

    Jane Doe No More: Story of Survival and Accountability with Donna Palomba

    27/03/2026 | 36 mins.
    Description
    In this episode of Perfect Prey, I’m joined by Donna Palomba, founder of Jane Doe No More and survivor of a violent home invasion and sexual assault that led to years of institutional betrayal.

    Donna shares her harrowing story—from surviving a brutal attack in her own home to being disbelieved, interrogated, and re-traumatized by the very system meant to protect her. What followed was a seven-year legal battle against law enforcement, uncovering systemic failures, bias, and the devastating impact of not believing victims.

    This conversation explores not only the trauma of the assault itself, but the profound harm caused by institutional betrayal—and the strength it takes to fight back, seek justice, and create change.

    What we cover
    Donna’s story of surviving a violent home invasion and sexual assault
    The immediate aftermath and failures in the investigative process
    Institutional betrayal and being treated as a suspect instead of a victim
    The long legal battle against law enforcement and systemic resistance
    The role of DNA evidence and delayed justice
    How perpetrators often live “double lives” and evade suspicion
    The impact of statute of limitations laws on survivors
    Donna’s advocacy work and the founding of Jane Doe No More
    Prevention, education, and empowering communities to protect others

    Why listen
    If you are a survivor, advocate, clinician, attorney, or protective parent, this episode offers a powerful and deeply emotional look at what happens when systems fail victims—and what it takes to hold those systems accountable. Donna’s story is both heartbreaking and hopeful, showing that even in the face of profound injustice, change is possible.

    Guest bio (short)
    Donna Palomba is the founder of Jane Doe No More, an organization dedicated to improving the way society responds to survivors of sexual crimes and advancing prevention education. After surviving a violent sexual assault and years of institutional betrayal, Donna became a leading advocate for victims’ rights, helping change laws and educate communities on safety, accountability, and survivor support.

    Learn more about Donna Palomba & Jane Doe No More:
    Website: ⁠https://janedoenomore.org/⁠Book (Jane Doe No More): ⁠https://www.amazon.com/Jane-Doe-No-More/dp/1642939709⁠Podcast (Jane Doe No More Podcast): ⁠https://janedoenomore.org/podcast/⁠
    Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/janedoenomore/⁠Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/janedoenomore⁠LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/company/jane-doe-no-more/⁠

    Connect with Dr. Christine
    Protective Parenting Program:⁠https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/services/for-parents/⁠
    Official site:⁠https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/⁠
    YouTube:⁠https://www.youtube.com/@DrCocchiola-coercivecontrol/videos⁠
    TikTok:⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.c_coercivecontrol⁠
    Instagram:⁠https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol/⁠
    Books:⁠https://url-shortener.me/c/FramedBook⁠⁠https://url-shortener.me/c/EveryMomentOfEveryDay⁠

    If this episode landed for you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it, subscribe for more trauma-informed conversations, and consider leaving a review — it helps other survivors find validation and safety.
    — Dr. Christine Cocchiola & guest Donna Palomba
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About Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast
Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola, DSW, LCSW is a Coercive Control Educator, Researcher, & Survivor. She has been an advocate since the age of 19, passionate about protecting children from abuse. Yet, even as a therapist, she didn't see the signs in her own relationship. How do we, as protective parents, support our children harmed by the coercive controller (aka Narcissistic Abuser)? Dr. Cocchiola's expertise provides the framework for supporting protective parents as they navigate parenting children harmed by the coercive controller. Protective parents can show their children a path to freedom.
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