Clearer, not Louder with Beatrice Kamau

In this episode we explore how to remain your warm, kind, and whimsical self while being clear and direct (you can be both!). We also discuss why being clear doesn't mean telling people what they can and cannot do and how to be clear and direct sans the fear of being rude, blunt, or "mean."
What you'll learn in this episode:
The difference between being clear and being controlling—and why they two are NOT actually related
How to free yourself from the responsibility of how someone processes your directness
How to communicate what you want, what you're available for, and what you will do next while leaving other people responsible for their own choices.
IG: @clearernotlouder

***PSST, NO EPISODE NEXT WEEK SEPTEMBER 10, WE WILL BE BACK SEPTEMBER 17 IN LIGHT OF LABOR DAY***
In this episode, we chat: Why being comfortable and confident setting boundaries with other people might start with getting better at telling yourself no—and what your day-to-day choices can teach you about saying no when letting things slide, minimizing the severity of an issue, or simply going along with it feels like... the easier option.
What you'll learn in this episode:
Why setting boundaries is about more than knowing what to say—and how the way you manage your impulses and emotions in everyday life can show up, positively or negatively, in the boundaries you set with others.
What it looks like to tell yourself no when yes is still an option, and why being able to do something doesn't always mean it's in your best interest to do it.
How to actually begin building the muscle to hold boundaries with others without the guilt, mind-spiraling, and preoccupation with how they will receive what you say.
Book recommendation mentioned: Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg, PhD
IG: @clearernotlouder

In this episode, we chat:
Why you should consider yourself—and the things you're drawn to—interesting and worth paying attention to, not just other people, and how uncovering the unique perspectives God has placed within you connects to the purpose over your life.
What you'll learn in this episode:
What the people you consider "interesting," "unique," and "cool" are doing differently that causes them to stand out—and why it's not what you think.
How dropping performance and developing your own unique point of view around your interests can make you far more interesting than trying to be interesting.
How the things you're naturally drawn to and curious about tell a story about the gifts and skills the Lord has equipped you with for the purpose & assignment over your life.
IG: @clearernotlouder

In this episode, we chat:
The FINE line between what it's like to have a connection-- a friendship, a relationship etc-- with someone who is delighted to learn the ins and outs of you and someone who... wants to relate to you on their terms
What you'll learn in this episode:
What it looks like when you make a decision to no longer FIGHT and adjust yourself in order to be seen.
The difference between being mindful about how you communicate to someone and changing who you are to sustain the connection-- adapting vs. self-sacrificing.
Why someone NOT taking the time to know the ins-and-outs and quirky little facts about you does not mean you're not worth getting to know deeply-- they might just not be... for you ESPECIALLY if you're a whimsical and curious girly.
IG: @clearernotlouder

In this episode, we chat:
How to stay CLEAR AND FIRM on what you know, want, and believe when someone else's pressure or reactions challenge your boundaries, values and opinions.
What you'll learn in this episode:
Why a friendly "come onnn" after you've already said no is worth paying attention to—and how easily a decision can become a negotiation you never agreed to have.
Why someone telling you all about who they're going to be can distract you from paying attention to who they're showing you they are right now.
How dramatic reactions and "well, what about you?" arguments can leave you questioning a choice you were perfectly clear about five minutes ago—and what that can tell you about your discernment.
IG: @clearernotlouder