The Ex-Good Girl Podcast

This episode is a reminder of how prejudice can soften when we look beyond policies to see real people, and it feels especially important to bring it back now. In this re-release of a past conversation, I’m joined by my dear friend Alex Regan, a trans man, interfaith minister, speaker, author, and transformative spiritual coach. Meeting Alex changed my life because it replaced my experience of an abstract label with a real human being with a nervous system, a story, hopes, and fears just like me. Once you see someone clearly like that, it becomes much harder to ignore how they are being treated. My hope is that hearing Alex’s story will create that same kind of shift for you. Here’s what I cover:

How stories reduce prejudice by turning a “group” into a real person you actually care about
How good girl conditioning trains us to abandon ourselves and why that wiring shows up everywhere
Alex’s journey of unlearning evangelical rules and building trust in his own inner knowing
What it looks like to stop fighting for approval and let people be wrong about you
How community changes everything when you stop performing and start living as your real self

Find Alex here:
www.alexreegan.com
www.instagram.com/revreegs

Find Sara here:
sarafisk.coach
pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations
www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/
www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/
www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach
www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!
Book a Free Consult

It’s so easy to feel stuck and overwhelmed when we haven’t figured something out yet. But what if you looked for the evidence in your life that you can solve the problem? In this episode, I share how I’m borrowing belief from my past self to help me make a decision I’m wrestling with now. Instead of demanding certainty or shaming myself for not knowing the answer, I’m using real proof from my own history to help me relax while I take the time to figure it out. Here’s what I cover:

How leaving the church one step at a time taught me how to untangle my beliefs
Why your brain relaxes when you offer it real evidence from your past
How to copy and paste a past growth process onto the problem you’re facing today
The self-judgment that creeps in when you think you should have it figured out by now
A powerful visualization to help you imagine the future version of you who already solved the problem

Find Sara here:
sarafisk.coach
pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations
www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/
www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/
www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach
www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!
Book a Free Consult

The overwhelming amount of information, emotion, and terror we are experiencing in the world right now can make it hard to know what to do with ourselves. Last week’s episode came from my own experience of feeling like I was going to break and realizing my nervous system was completely overloaded. In this episode, I build on that and talk about what to do—because it’s not enough to say you will “just get off social media” or “stop doom scrolling.” If it were that simple, I would have stopped, and maybe you would have too. We’ll look at why this is so hard to put down and what it takes to step back in a way that allows you to stay informed without losing yourself in the crush of information. Here’s what I cover:

Why doom scrolling is not activism and can hinder you from taking thoughtful action
The good girl rules that make disengaging feel like a moral failing
Why learning to regulate your nervous system can be a powerful form of resistance
What happens when your reptile brain takes over and you’re stuck in looping thoughts
Practical ways to regulate so you can stay informed and respond in ways that actually help

Find Sara here:
sarafisk.coach
pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations
www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/
www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/
www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach
www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!
Book a Free Consult

Over the last few weeks, the constant exposure to human suffering, injustice, and horrifying information has felt like an avalanche. If you’ve been taking this in through social media and the news like I have, you might notice yourself swinging between obsessing and shutting down, or believing that if you look away or take a break, it means you don’t care. In this episode, I share what helped me understand what was actually happening in my nervous system and why feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means your body was never meant to hold all of this. Here’s what I cover:

An Instagram post that helped me understand how the overwhelm we’re living through impacts the body
How flooding ourselves with horrific information without containment destabilizes our nervous systems
Why empathy and good girl conditioning can turn caring into self-sacrifice
Three things to pay attention to so we can stay connected to the truth without losing ourselves
What it looks like to give yourself permission to decide what level of engagement is right for you

Find Sara here:
https://sarafisk.coach
https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations
https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/
https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/
https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach
https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!
Book a Free Consult

In this episode, I sit down with erotic wholeness guide Darshana Avila to talk about embodiment, authenticity, and coming home to the body. Darshana was featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & Goop, which was one of my early introductions to a broader idea of eroticism as I began to unravel my good girl conditioning. We explore what happens when women don’t know what they want or don’t trust their bodies—a disconnection shaped by the systems we were raised in, not personal failure. Darshana offers a different path forward, rooted in compassion, nervous-system safety, and learning to listen to the body. Here’s what we cover:

How Darshana defines erotic wholeness and why it’s not limited to sex
Why “I don’t know what I want” is a common and understandable starting point
What compartmentalization looks like in real life and how conditioning keeps it in place
How authenticity begins with sensing what is and isn’t for you
Simple ways to begin reconnecting through your senses and the four allies of erotic embodiment

Darshana Avila is a trauma-informed somatic educator, practitioner and international speaker who helps people reconnect with the most essential aspects of themselves — their truth, their desires, and their capacity for profound pleasure and power. Her work has been featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & Goop, The Guardian, The New Yorker, and numerous leading podcasts.

Find Darshana here:
darshanaavila.com
instagram.com/darshana_avila
youtube.com/@darshana-avila
linkedin.com/in/darshana-avila
https://darshanaavila.com/podcast/

Find Sara here:
https://sarafisk.coach
https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations
https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/
https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/
https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach
https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!
Book a Free Consult