In a world full of social media promoting "perfect lives", many of us are afraid to show our true authentic selves. The good, the bad and the ugly. Behind the S...
Ep 116. Finding Freedom in Fitness, with Niki Kiskiras
In this latest episode, Ash sits down with beauty corporate executive and fitness instructor Niki Kiskiras. Beyond her career achievements, Niki shares her deeply personal journey of self-discovery, overcoming societal expectations, and reclaiming her independence after ending her marriage in her late 20s.Coming from a traditional Greek-Australian background, Niki opens up about the immense shame and fear she faced when making the decision to leave her marriage, a life path she had followed because it was what was “expected.” She reflects on the pressure to present a perfect life while internally feeling lost, the guilt of disappointing her family, and the reality of choosing herself despite cultural norms and external judgment.Ash and Niki explore how fitness became a powerful tool for self-liberation, how her relationships evolved post-divorce, and why she ultimately stepped into a life of authenticity, personal growth, and fearless reinvention. They also discuss Nikki’s decision to freeze her eggs as an act of self-empowerment, navigating grief in unexpected moments, and what it means to truly invest in oneself.The episode highlights are:00:00 Introduction to Transformation and Authenticity02:52 Niki's Journey: From Corporate to Fitness Instructor06:05 The Impact of Family and Cultural Background08:57 Navigating Life's Challenges and Personal Growth12:08 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Wedding Photo Story14:57 The Decision to Separate: Fear and Shame17:54 Finding Authenticity and Purpose21:02 The Role of Fitness in Personal Transformation23:45 Living Consciously: The Relationship with Alcohol31:05 Navigating Personal Growth and Friendships36:01 The Journey of Egg Freezing42:30 Understanding Relationship Needs52:24 The Reality Behind Social Media57:31 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling LifeYou can connect with Niki Kiskiras on her fitness page Instagram.To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website https://www.ashbutterss.com/free-resourcesFollow and connect with Ash on: Instagram TikTok Facebook Website
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Ep 115. It’s Never Too Late to Start Over, with Belinda Stark
In this episode, Ash sits down with Alcohol and Midlife Coach, Belinda Stark, who shows that it’s never too late to transform your life after making her own significant changes in her mid-50s. After running a successful fashion business for over a decade, Belinda made the bold decision to change careers, inspired by her own journey of overcoming depression, breast cancer, divorce, and a complex relationship with alcohol.Belinda shares her personal struggles, including postnatal depression and hospitalisation after the birth of her second son, the moment she realised alcohol was no longer serving her, and how she finally found the courage to step into sobriety. She reflects on the tools that helped her along the way, the challenges of reprogramming deep-seated beliefs, and the incredible shifts she has experienced in her relationships, self-esteem, and overall happiness.Ash and Belinda also discuss the importance of self-compassion, navigating midlife reinvention, and why it’s never too late to make a change.The episode highlights are:00:00 Introduction to Transformation and Resilience02:39 Belinda Stark: A Journey of Courage08:28 Hiding Behind the Smile: The Struggles Within18:02 Childhood Influences and Early Habits22:50 The Turning Point: Acknowledging Alcoholism26:36 Facing Breast Cancer: A Life-Altering Diagnosis30:09 Overcoming Health Challenges33:08 The Role of Mindset in Recovery35:16 The Journey to Sobriety Begins39:39 Tapering vs. Cold Turkey: Finding What Works40:59 Navigating Social Situations Sober47:27 Tools for Sustaining Sobriety49:02 Transforming Relationships Through Sobriety53:44 Empowering Change in Midlife55:53 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling LifeYou can connect with Belinda Stark on Instagram or through her website. To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website https://www.ashbutterss.com/free-resourcesFollow and connect with Ash on: Instagram TikTok Facebook Website
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Ep 114. The True Cost of Success, with Ryan Trainor
In this latest episode, Ash has a deep and powerful conversation with Ryan Trainor, exploring his transformative journey from a successful entrepreneur to a more authentic and balanced human.They discuss the importance of curiosity, connection, and the need to let go of control in life. Ryan shares his experiences with mental health, the pressures of success, and the impact of childhood on his quest for relevance. The conversation also touches on the use of psychedelics for personal growth and the empowerment that comes from taking responsibility for your relationships and experiences. Ash and Ryan explore the constructs of reality, the importance of community and connection, and the journey of personal growth through challenges. They discuss the need for open conversations, the impact of facing rock bottom, and the transformative power of meditation and mindfulness. The episode highlights are:00:00 Introduction to Transformation and Authenticity01:47 Ryan Treanor's Entrepreneurial Journey and Wake-Up Call03:06 Curiosity and Connection in Life09:13 Letting Go of Control and Embracing Faith11:24 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Cost of Success18:15 Childhood Influences and the Quest for Relevance24:39 Empowerment Through Responsibility and Relationships27:19 Exploring Psychedelics and Personal Growth32:04 The Constructs of Reality34:06 Defining Our Avatars36:25 The Need for Connection37:51 Navigating Community and Authenticity40:13 The Power of Open Conversations44:20 Facing Rock Bottom49:32 Meditation and Mindfulness53:25 Shifting Desires and Values57:16 Creating Meaningful Memories01:00:14 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling LifeYou can connect with Ryan Trainor on Instagram or LinkedIn.Listen to Ash and her dad’s episode on Trainable here.To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s websiteFollow and connect with Ash on: Instagram TikTok Facebook Website
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Ep 113. Navigating Divorce in Sobriety, with Kath Elliott
In this episode, Ash welcomes back a friend of the show, Kath Elliott, an alcohol mindset coach now entering her sixth year of sobriety. Kath returns to share openly about her recent experience of navigating divorce in sobriety. Kath discusses the fears that held her back, and how she ultimately made the decision to choose herself. Ash and Kath go on to discuss the emotional rollercoaster of grief, self-discovery, and learning to sit with discomfort, and how Kath found clarity through sobriety. The ladies also explore dating sober, redefining wealth beyond finances, and the power of stepping into life’s unknowns with courage. If you’ve ever questioned whether staying is harder than leaving, or if you’re afraid of what’s on the other side of a massive life transition—this episode is for you.The episode highlights are:00:00 Welcome Back: A Familiar Face03:08 Navigating Life Changes: Grief and Divorce05:55 The Decision to Separate: A Journey of Intuition08:49 The Impact of Sobriety on Relationships11:57 Children and Separation: A Delicate Balance14:52 Redefining Success: Lessons from Marriage18:02 Embracing the Unknown: The Power of Self-Love20:52 Facing Fears: Financial and Emotional Challenges24:09 The Journey of Dating Sober26:54 Wealth Beyond Money: Redefining Abundance30:06 Looking Ahead: Love and New Beginnings33:08 Non-Negotiables for an Authentic LifeYou can connect with Kath Elliot on Instagram or through her website.To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s websiteFollow and connect with Ash on: Instagram TikTok Facebook Website
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Ep 112. From Reality Star to Rock Bottom and Recovery, with Davey Lloyd
In this episode of Behind the Smile, Ash is joined by former reality TV star Davey Lloyd, who you might recognise from shows including The Bachelorette and Bachelor in Paradise. Now a builder living in Sydney, Davey opens up about his struggles with addiction which took him to the brink of death after overdosing in 2023. In this candid conversation, Davey shares his harrowing journey through addiction, a life-threatening seizure, and the path he is now on in recovery. He reflects on the moments that led to his near-death experience, the emotional turmoil that followed, and the transformative power of rehabilitation. Davey discusses the importance of self-discovery, the challenges of maintaining sobriety, and his commitment to helping others facing similar struggles. This interview is as raw and unfiltered as it gets. The episode highlights include:03:02 Valentine's Day Reflections and Sobriety06:04 Daily Life and Struggles with Motivation08:57 Understanding Addiction and Mental Health11:58 The Impact of Childhood on Adult Behavior14:49 The Burden of Shame and Guilt18:05 Living Amends and Personal Growth21:02 The Slow Process of Recovery23:46 Learning to Connect Authentically27:09 The Reality of Hair Loss and Substance Abuse28:58 The Overdose Experience and Its Aftermath32:31 The Turning Point: A Life-Altering Experience39:06 Confronting Addiction: The Aftermath of a Seizure48:35 Rehabilitation: A Journey of Self-Discovery55:08 Finding Balance: Life After Rehab01:01:15 Looking Ahead: Writing a Memoir and AdvocacyYou can connect with Davey Lloyd on Instagram here. To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s websiteFollow and connect with Ash on: Instagram TikTok Facebook Website
In a world full of social media promoting "perfect lives", many of us are afraid to show our true authentic selves. The good, the bad and the ugly. Behind the Smile with Ash Butterss is a podcast that aims to reveal the truth that lies behind the masks we wear.
After making the decision to get sober in 2020, Ash set out on a mission, quitting her corporate job and diving deeply into the world of self-development and recovery. Her mission is to smash through the stereotype that surrounds addiction and to help people live a fulfilled life connected to their purpose.
New Zealand