Behind The Smile with Ash Butterss

This week you’re invited to listen in as Ash sits down with her lifelong friend Edwina, to explore what it means to remake your life in the wake of loss, motherhood, and big internal change. Edwina opens up about the sudden death of her brother, how grief reshaped her sense of self, and the quiet, courageous decision to question her relationship with alcohol.

She shares what happened when she chose an alcohol-free life, not just on the surface, but in her identity, her friendships, and the way she shows up as a mother and a woman. Ash and Edwina dive into the role of therapy on this path, unpacking powerful modalities like EMDR, and how these practices helped her meet the younger parts of herself with compassion instead of criticism.

Together, they talk about the fears that come with sobriety and the unexpected gifts that arrive when the noise of drinking is stripped away. The conversation shines a light on how retreats, community, and intentional healing practices can open space for self-discovery, deeper connection, and true emotional safety.

Episode Chapters:
​​00:00 Introduction to Retreats and Self-Discovery
01:35 Meet Edwina: A Journey Through Life
03:34 Navigating Grief and Vulnerability
06:44 The Impact of Injury on Identity
09:11 Finding Purpose in Adversity
11:01 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Photo Story
21:17 The Unfairness of Life and Loss
23:00 Alcohol: A Coping Mechanism
35:13 Healing and Understanding Family Dynamics
35:48 Therapeutic Journeys: Exploring EMDR and Internal Family Systems
38:02 The Alcohol-Free Awakening: A Personal Journey
42:09 Facing Fears: The Terrifying Decision to Quit Drinking
46:14 Redefining Relationships: Alcohol and Authentic Connections
50:21 Building Deeper Friendships: The Shift in Social Dynamics
55:12 The Power of Vulnerability: Authenticity in Relationships
01:01:05 Embracing Change: The Journey of Self-Discovery
01:07:52 Investing in Self: The Importance of Personal Retreats
01:12:30 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life: Community, Nourishment, and Movement

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Upcoming Workshops:

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In another deeply honest solo episode, Ash reflects on the six biggest mistakes she’s made across six years of sobriety and how each one became a turning point for growth, self-trust, and real transformation. She takes you back to the day her life changed, then walks you through the lessons that followed, from expecting others to change, to trying to squeeze her new self into her old life, to giving her power away to people who didn’t have the best intentions.
She opens up about people pleasing, outgrowing relationships, chasing what’s next instead of appreciating what’s now, and the humbling realisation that healing has no finish line. These are the truths she learned the long way, the kind that only come through lived experience, deep reflection, and choosing honesty over comfort.
If you’re navigating change, questioning your path, or learning how to stand in your truth even when it costs you, this episode will feel like a conversation you didn’t know you needed.

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Upcoming Workshops:

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026

Reset and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this powerful and deeply honest conversation, Ash is joined by her mentor and high performance advisor, Mark “Dobbo” Dobson, for a thought-provoking exploration of what it truly takes to grow, evolve, and rise after life challenges you. Together they dive beneath surface level success and unpack the real work behind clarity, purpose, and personal expansion.
Dobbo shares hard-earned wisdom on defining your values, sharpening your vision, and having the courage to live in full alignment with who you really are. They also explore how adversity can become a catalyst for transformation, and why the relationships we choose play a pivotal role in shaping the person we become.
This conversation is a powerful reminder that meaningful growth is not built on perfection, it is built on honesty, resilience, and the willingness to turn life’s hardest moments into the foundation for something greater.

You can connect with Dobbo through his website www.dobbo.com.au.

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!
The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026
Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Ash is joined again by her dad, Rod, for a candid conversation about the real complexities of love and relationships. They unpack topics many people experience but rarely talk about openly, including love addiction, love avoidance, codependency, and what healthy communication actually looks like in practice.
Drawing on both personal experience and honest reflection, they explore how family dynamics shape the way we love, the patterns we repeat without realising, and what it takes to change them. Ash also opens up about a deeply personal crossroads, her uncertainty around motherhood, and the inner questions that come with choosing a path that feels true rather than expected.
Their father daughter conversations are always listener favourites, and this is exactly why they continue to shine a light on the honest, nuanced conversations that many people are thinking about, but few feel safe enough to say out loud.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Ash has a raw conversation with husband, father, and sober human Vim Verma as they discuss addiction, identity, and what happens when you finally stop running from yourself. Vim opens up about growing up in a mixed-race culture where drinking was normalised, emotions were rarely spoken about, and asking for help felt almost impossible.

Together, they unpack the quiet pressures of family expectations, the heavy emotional charge of the holiday season, and the stigma that keeps so many people suffering in silence. There are moments of grief, moments of clarity, and Vim’s classic humour, that remind us how human this journey really is.

Vim also shares how his recovery program, meditation, and spiritual practice became a turning point, helping him strip back the noise and reconnect with who he is beneath the coping mechanisms. This is a conversation about breaking cycles, choosing courage over comfort, and discovering that real healing starts on the inside.

If you’ve ever questioned your relationship with alcohol, felt trapped by expectations, or wondered what life could look like if you truly listened to yourself, this episode will land.

Episode Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to Retreats and Self-Discovery
01:34 Vim Verma's Journey to Sobriety
03:45 Navigating Sobriety During the Holidays
04:54 Cultural Influences on Drinking
07:24 The Impact of Family Dynamics
07:53 Getting to Know Vim: Daily Life and Fun
14:06 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Photo Story
16:20 The Progression of Alcoholism
19:05 Consequences of Drinking: Crashing and Bashing
28:18 The Turning Point: Seeking Help
31:44 Experiences in Early Recovery
38:47 Finding Hope in Recovery
41:54 Life After Sobriety: Changes and Growth
47:50 Navigating Life's Challenges in Recovery
51:23 The Role of Support in Recovery
59:46 Non-Negotiables for a Happy Life

You can connect with Vim through his Instagram here. 

Follow and connect with Ash on: 
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Upcoming Workshops:
A Return To You | One Day Retreat 
Sunday 22nd February, 2026
Tickets available here. 

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!
The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 
Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.