Behind The Smile with Ash Butterss

This week, Ash sits down with Rosie Eldershaw, a country girl turned Melburnian who recently celebrated three years of sobriety after multiple rehabs and several near-fatal rock bottoms. Rosie shares how her drinking progressed from nightly wine to 24/7 spirits and drugs, and how she kept a bubbly, high-functioning facade while quietly falling apart inside. She speaks honestly about seizures, the shame of drinking hand sanitiser and mouthwash, and the terror of knowing something was very wrong but feeling powerless to stop.

Rosie reflects on the turning points that finally stuck: finding a 12-step program, allowing others to help, and building a simple, peaceful life she genuinely enjoys with yoga, dog parks, her partner and her dog. This is a grounded, hopeful conversation about ownership, spirituality, and the non-negotiables that now protect her sobriety and happiness.

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Episode chapters:
00:00 Introduction and Journey of Transformation
03:01 Rosie's Story of Sobriety
05:56 The Struggles Behind the Smile
08:57 The Dangerous Path of Alcoholism
12:07 Childhood and Early Influences
14:48 The Progression of Drinking
17:58 Family Concerns and Consequences
20:54 The Desperation of Addiction
23:55 The Journey to Rehab
26:28 The Journey Through Rehab
29:00 The Turning Point: A Meeting That Changed Everything
32:52 Embracing Spirituality in Recovery
36:57 Overcoming the Ego: Finding a Higher Power
40:46 Living One Day at a Time
46:29 Building Healthy Relationships in Sobriety
53:24 Non-Negotiables for a Happy Life

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash returns with a solo episode that’s felt long overdue. After a season of slowing down and stepping back, she’s back behind the mic on her own, not with all the answers, but with a deeper level of honesty about what it really means to accept life as it is.

Drawing on yoga philosophy, recovery, and her own lived experience, Ash explores the tension between control and surrender. She opens up about her patterns of perfectionism, the need to hold everything together, and the unexpected peace that came when she finally softened her grip.

This is a deeply personal reflection on relationships, family dynamics, and the moments that still stir old wounds. Ash also shares her experience navigating motherhood, fertility, and loss, and how these chapters have shaped her understanding of acceptance in a way no theory ever could.

If you’ve been trying to control outcomes, fix everything, or push against what is, this episode offers a different way.

A gentle reminder that peace isn’t found in having it all figured out, but in learning to meet yourself exactly where you are.

Episode chapters:
00:00 Introduction and Intentions
00:57 Embracing Vulnerability in Solo Episodes
04:03 The Journey of Acceptance
10:10 Letting Go of Control
15:00 Navigating Relationships with Acceptance
20:04 The Spiritual Journey and Personal Growth
24:53 Conclusion and Call to Action

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:
The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!
Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with embodied dance artist and coach Taylah King, whose journey from darkness to rediscovery is both heart-wrenching and deeply inspiring. Taylah opens up about her twelve-year relationship and marriage that began in childhood, the growing inner whisper that something wasn't right, and the vulnerability of walking away from the only safety she'd ever known. From alcohol abuse that started at fourteen to a drug-induced psychosis triggered by ayahuasca, Taylah shares candidly about spending two years dissociated from reality, convinced she was dead, and trapped in a mental health crisis that felt inescapable.

She reflects on the terrifying experience of psychosis, the inadequacy of traditional mental health support, and the overwhelming loneliness of not knowing if she'd ever come back. Taylah describes the turning point that changed everything: surrendering to faith, working with a mentor, and falling in love for the first time while sober, which allowed her to finally feel again after years of numbness. Throughout their conversation, Ash and Taylah explore the danger of spiritual bypassing, the power of embodiment practices, and the importance of learning to listen to your nervous system instead of seeking answers outside yourself.

Today, Taylah uses dance and movement as medicine, helping others reconnect to their bodies and move freely in the world without substances. Her story is a powerful reminder that even in the deepest darkness, there is always a way back home to yourself.

Episode Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Taylah's Journey
02:56 Rediscovery Through Dance
06:05 The Struggles Behind the Smile
09:02 Substance Abuse and Its Impact
12:01 The Role of Ayahuasca in Healing
14:58 Experiencing Psychosis
17:55 The Aftermath of Psychosis
21:02 Finding Freedom in Movement
30:11 The Journey Through Psychosis
34:01 Spiritual Awakening and Healing
39:12 The Role of Love and Relationships in Recovery
43:10 Embodiment and Self-Connection
51:13 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life

You can connect with Taylah using the links below:
Instagram: @taylahkingmovement

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Upcoming Workshops:
The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with author Blake D. Bauer, whose book You Were Not Born to Suffer has helped thousands rethink the way they relate to themselves, their pain, and their past. Blake opens up about his own journey through addiction, mental health struggles, and the pressure to keep it all hidden behind a smile, tracing how childhood experiences and emotional confusion shaped the way he moved through the world.

He shares how meditation and Eastern philosophies became lifelines and a pathway into healing. Ash and Blake dive into the power of morning meditation, the quiet joy of everyday moments, and what it really means to take radical responsibility for your inner life instead of waiting for someone else to fix it.

Throughout their conversation, Blake offers grounded, practical steps for cultivating self-love and rebuilding self-trust: listening to your own needs, telling yourself the truth, and learning to treat yourself with the same honesty and kindness you’d offer someone you care about.

If you’re looking for simple ways that will significantly improve your life, this episode is for you!

Episode Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Blake Bauer's Journey
02:59 The Importance of Morning Meditation
06:01 Finding Joy in Everyday Life
09:01 The Impact of Travel on Personal Growth
12:04 Hiding Behind a Smile: A Personal Story
15:04 Childhood Influences and Emotional Struggles
17:51 The Role of Sports in Blake's Life
20:50 Consequences of Substance Abuse
23:48 Awakening to a Spiritual Journey
27:06 The Healing Power of Eastern Philosophies
32:57 The Journey to Self-Discovery
34:10 The Importance of Self-Love
38:38 Practical Steps to Cultivate Self-Love
50:23 Rebuilding Self-Trust and Confidence
58:44 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life

You can connect with Blake using the links below:
Free Meditation: https://vimeo.com/768757355
Website: https://elevatewellness.io/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blakedbauer/?hl=en
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/YouWereNotBornToSuffer.by.BlakeDBauer
LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/blake-d-bauer

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Upcoming Workshops:
The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Melbourne - Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with powerhouse performer Naomi Eyers, whose four-decade career has taken her from session singer to London’s West End, global tours with The Fabulous Singlettes, and sharing stages with icons like Shirley Bassey and Tom Jones. Behind the spotlight, Naomi has quietly built over 31 years of sobriety, reshaping not just her life in music, but the way she shows up for herself and others.

Naomi opens up about her early experiences with alcohol and drugs, the pull of ambition, and the quiet moments that revealed her relationship with drinking was no longer sustainable. She shares candidly about the ups and downs of her recovery journey including her recent heart attack that became a brutal wake-up call, going to rehab with almost three decades of sobriety, and the spiritual and emotional work that followed.

Together, they trace Naomi’s journey through addiction, sobriety, and the long road of staying sober through life’s inevitable turmoil including grief, changing relationships, and the ongoing demands of a life in the arts. Naomi reflects on the role of community, the impact of the relationships that held a mirror up when she needed it most, and the way music, fun, and creativity still sit at the heart of her life today, only now grounded in peace rather than chaos.

Naomi shares how today she values spiritual connection, honest self-reflection, service, and simple daily routines that keep her anchored in gratitude and presence.

Episode chapters:
00:00 Introduction to the Retreats and Podcast
01:19 Naomi Eyers: A Life in Music
03:12 Daily Routine and Morning Practices
11:32 Spiritual Connection and Personal Growth
15:03 Finding Fun and Connection in Recovery
18:11 The Search for Inner Peace
22:42 Early Experiences with Alcohol
28:27 Life as a Young Performer
31:47 The Restless Pursuit of Ambition
34:00 Navigating the Music Scene in Sydney
36:47 Living in a Narcissistic Bubble
39:19 The Illusion of Success
42:42 The Catalyst for Change
44:31 Rock Bottom and Relationships
46:30 The Denial of Alcoholism
50:53 The Struggle for Control
55:30 The Moment of Surrender
01:00:12 Awakening to the Truth
01:04:11 Finding a New Path in Recovery
01:08:13 The Struggle of Sobriety
01:09:42 The Journey of Recovery and Relapse
01:11:37 Relationships and Higher Powers
01:13:33 The Impact of Lockdown on Relationships
01:16:39 The Heart Attack: A Wake-Up Call
01:18:28 Seeking Help: The Path to Recovery
01:22:17 Experiences at South Pacific Private
01:25:09 The Importance of Vulnerability in Recovery
01:30:24 The Power of Community and Connection
01:36:56 Letting Go and Embracing Change
01:40:41 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life

Follow and connect with Ash on:
⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss
TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb
Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Upcoming Workshops:

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.