Marriage is a constant journey of learning, growth, and reminding ourselves of the basics—especially during stressful seasons. In this week’s episode, we’re taking you behind the scenes of our own marriages to share the top three lessons we’ve each learned with our spouses over the years.We kick things off with a little chit chat (thanks to Colin for the idea!) about what we’ve been reading and watching lately before diving into the heart of the episode: the relationship lessons that continue to shape our marriages.Here’s what you’ll hear in today’s episode:Amy’s #1: Why standing by your core values matters, even when it feels uncomfortable—especially when it comes to finances.Abby’s #1: The power of speaking up when it matters most (without nitpicking everything).Amy’s #2: Shifting your perspective from “me vs. you” to “us vs. the problem.”Abby’s #2: Embracing the reality that we all change over time—and learning to love your spouse as they grow.Amy’s #3: Letting your partner positively influence you (this one gets spicy!).Abby’s #3: Why having dreams together matters—and how to let your spouse in on yours.If you’ve been craving real, honest conversations about what makes marriage work, this episode will give you tangible reminders, relatable stories, and encouragement to keep building a strong foundation with your partner.Let us know what resonates most with you! Share your biggest takeaway from this episode over on Instagram @herselfpodcast—we love hearing from you.LINKS AND RESOURCES:LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herselfLet’s connect!HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcastHERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcastMEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskieferMEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreenThis episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.
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302. The 5 Ways We Show Up in Conflict (and What They Mean for Our Relationships)
Conflict is a natural part of every relationship—whether it’s in marriage, friendship, family, or work. In this week’s episode, we’re diving into the 5 different conflict styles (the accommodator, the avoider, the compromiser, the competitor, and the collaborator) and exploring how they show up in our lives.We share personal stories and examples of how conflict plays out differently in our marriages versus our friendships. Abby opens up about realizing her conflict style might not be what she originally thought after reflecting with her husband, Colin, who leans more toward the “need to be right” style. Amy talks about how she used to lean heavily on avoidance but, through therapy, has been growing into a more collaborative approach.Inside this episode, you’ll learn:What the 5 conflict styles are and how they show up in relationships.Why saying “we never fight” might actually mean you’re not speaking up for yourself.Why our conflict styles can look different in marriage vs. friendships.How to decide which relationships are worth working through conflict for.Remember: the goal isn’t to avoid conflict altogether, but to understand how you (and those around you) approach it so you can move toward healthier resolutions.Read the article on the 5 conflict styles here.LINKS AND RESOURCES:GOODR: Free Shipping with code HERSELF: https://goodr.com/herselfFORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest locationCORNBREAD HEMP: 30% off with code HERSELF cornbreadhemp.com/herselfLet’s connect!HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcastHERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcastMEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskieferMEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreenThis episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.
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301. Greatest Hits: Getting Real on Relationships After Kids with The Shrink Chicks
Since it’s a holiday here in the U.S., we’re bringing back one of our most downloaded and loved episodes of all time—with none other than the incredible Shrink Chicks, Emmalee and Jennifer, co-founders of The Therapy Group.These two women are experts in relationships, and in this conversation, we dig deep into what happens after kids enter the picture. From navigating conflict and working through small disagreements to building healthier communication patterns, this episode is packed with strategies you can use at every stage of your relationship.To be honest, it felt like we were sitting in on our very own couples therapy session—except thousands of you were right there with us, nodding along to the truths being shared.What you’ll learn in this episode:How to navigate conflict in a way that strengthens your relationship.Tools to move through disagreements without disconnecting.Why communication patterns matter more than winning an argument.The importance of seeking support instead of trying to “fix it all” on your own.Important note: The guidance shared in this episode is meant for those in safe, healthy relationships. If abuse is present, these tools won’t apply, and we encourage you to seek professional resources and support.One of the most powerful takeaways from this conversation is that you don’t need to figure out your relationship struggles alone. Resources, therapy, and the right tools can transform your partnership—and your life.We’d love to hear your biggest “aha” moments after listening. Share your takeaways with us on Instagram and tag @shrinkchicks and @herselfpodcast so we can connect with you.LINKS AND RESOURCES:VUORI: 20% off first purchase at: http://vuoriclothing.com/herself LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herselfLet’s connect!HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcastHERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcastMEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskieferMEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreenThis episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.
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300. What We're Taking With Us and What We're Leaving Behind
As moms, we know every season brings new challenges, and summer can be one of the hardest to navigate. In this week’s episode, we share an honest summer recap—the wins, the struggles, and the lessons we’re carrying into fall and beyond.From childcare challenges to balancing marriage and motherhood, we open up about the good, the bad, and the messy parts of parenting during the summer months.Childcare struggles & solutions: Amy shares what she learned when their nanny left for college in August and how she’s planning ahead with summer camps for next year. Abby talks about what worked (parent swaps) and what will have to change as Owen transitions out of daycare.Parenting & relationships: Many parents find themselves burnt out by the end of summer, especially when one parent carries more of the load. Amy and Abby talk about how this impacts relationships—and why it’s important to ask for help before you’re drowning.Practical takeaways: From childcare swaps, community programs, and after-school care, to making small changes at home, Amy and Abby share the strategies that are helping their families run more smoothly.Personal edits: Amy admits she’s working on bringing more positivity to family check-in meetings, while Abby is finding balance between her love of open weekends and Colin’s need for structure.This conversation is a reminder for every parent: check in with yourself often. Needs change, kids grow, relationships evolve, and your routines should too. Don’t stay stuck—start making small edits now to set yourself up for a smoother season ahead.We also want to take a moment to celebrate a very special milestone today; this is our 300th episode! We couldn’t be here without the support of each and every one of you. Thank you for tuning in, listening week after week, and sharing the episodes that resonate the most with you. Here’s to 300 more!LINKS AND RESOURCES:BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herselfGOODR: Free Shipping with code HERSELF: https://goodr.com/herselfCORNBREAD HEMP: 30% off with code HERSELF cornbreadhemp.com/herselfLet’s connect!HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcastHERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcastMEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskieferMEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreenThis episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.
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299. The Happiness Episode
Happiness. For some, the word sparks joy. For others, it feels complicated. In this episode, we’re unpacking what happiness truly means — and why our own perspectives on the word itself are surprisingly different.Inspired by research from a UC Berkeley professor who studies happiness, we explore three key factors proven to boost your well-being:Human connection — why in-person connection is essential for joy.Expressing gratitude — how appreciation shifts your mindset.Volunteering — the surprising way giving back benefits you, too.We also share personal stories and simple practices we use to spark happiness in our own lives — even on hard days.If you’ve ever wondered why happiness can feel so elusive or how to cultivate more of it, this conversation is a heartfelt mix of science, personal reflection, and actionable tips you can try today.LINKS AND RESOURCES:FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest locationLMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF Let’s connect!HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcastHERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcastMEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskieferMEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreenThis episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.
As women and mothers of young children, it can be easy to compare ourselves to others. But your life isn't supposed to look like hers! Being your best self means standing firm in your decisions and always being willing to grow with a purpose. Are you wanting more ease in your marriage? Or more enjoyment as a parent? Are you looking for a strategy to the health challenges you have been facing recently? Do you feel like you have been staring at a stranger in the mirror since becoming a mother? Abby and Amy get vulnerable with topics around partnership, motherhood, health, and self improvement by interviewing authors, therapists, experts and everyday mothers. Our conversations will meet you with solutions and solidarity as you find a life path that feels aligned for you. If this sounds like you, hit play on your favorite episode title and make sure you're following the HERself podcast.
New Zealand