The Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy

• 115. Play It! Capturing the Moment, Discerning When to Use Shifts, With Here-and-Now Emotion and Longings.

  Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. This podcast episode focuses on the critical concept of "timing" in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), specifically when and how therapists should "play it" during therapeutic sessions. Hosts Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Reyna discuss the importance of recognizing and responding to vulnerable emotions and caregiving moments in couples therapy. Main Points: Key Ingredients of a Secure Bond Vulnerable, live emotion Accessible, responsive, and engaged (ARE) caregiving system Timing Considerations Earlier in therapy: Play moments quickly (less room for vulnerability) Later in therapy: More space to let emotions develop Clinical decision-making about when to intervene Critical Moments to "Play It" When vulnerable emotion emerges When a caregiving response is present Before the moment passes or the cycle interrupts vulnerability Risks of Not Playing the Moment Clients may exit the vulnerable space Emotional opportunities can be lost Cycle of interaction can revert to negative patterns Practical Advice Catch and recognize emotional moments Make clinical decisions about intervention Prioritize creating space for emotional connection The episode includes a role-play demonstration illustrating these principles, emphasizing the importance of therapist attunement and timely intervention. Upcoming events, if you would like to train with James or Ryan… You can do a joint Core Skills (Colorado) with Lisa J. Palmer-Olsen & Dr. James Hawkins. Core Skills Modules 1 and 2 will be held October 8-10, 2025, and Core Skills Modules 3 and 4 will be held January 7-9, 2026. You can register at https://courses.efft.org/courses/2025-core-skills-colorado. October 15-18, 2025, you can do an Externship with James in beautiful Bend, Oregon. You can register at https://www.counseloregon.com. You can train with Ryan, as well as George Faller, doing a live and some time with James, at the annual Arkansas EFT Center externship. July 29-August 1, 2025, in person, in Fayetteville, Arkansas. https://www.arkansaseft.com/events/externship We would like to invite everyone to come hang out and learn with the SV team at the first-ever SV Focus Lab. This is an advanced, EFCT training intending to push the edge with a focus on nuance in application, illuminating EFT and Sue’s incredible model.” You can learn more and register by going to https://www.svfocuslab.com. Leading edge listeners who register before July 1 with the code svfocuslab.com/leadingedge get a 10% discount. To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!

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• 114. The Resistant Client Series: Replace It! (w/ Corrective Emotional & Co-regulating Experiences)

  Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Overview and Themes: This podcast episode is the finale of the "Resistant Client Series," focusing on how therapists can transform client resistance into opportunities for deeper emotional connection and healing. Main Themes: 1. Understanding Resistance as Protective Behavior - Resistance isn't a problem to eliminate, but a weight-bearing mechanism protecting relationship dynamics - Every resistant stance has an attachment significance - Clients aren't being difficult; they're managing deep emotional fears 2. Theory of Change in EFT - Replace resistance with corrective emotional experiences - Help clients make clear emotional signals - Enable partners to provide compassionate comfort - Support clients in truly receiving and embodying that comfort 3. Clinical Wisdom - Don't lose hope with challenging clients - Trust the attachment map - Be intentional about vulnerability in therapeutic interventions - Focus on helping clients understand their own emotional experiences Closing Summary: In the intricate dance of human connection, resistance is not an obstacle, but a doorway. Each defensive stance whispers a profound story of fear, longing, and the desperate hope to be truly seen and loved. As therapists, our sacred work is not to dismantle these protective walls, but to gently illuminate the tender heart beating behind them. We are architects of hope, helping couples rediscover the language of vulnerability, transforming cycles of pain into rhythms of connection. Every moment of resistance carries within it the seed of healing - waiting to be understood, honored, and transformed. Keep pushing the leading edge. Keep believing in love's remarkable capacity to heal. Upcoming events, if you would like to train with James or Ryan… You can do a joint Core Skills (Colorado) with Lisa J. Palmer-Olsen & Dr. James Hawkins. Core Skills Modules 1 and 2 will be held October 8-10, 2025, and Core Skills Modules 3 and 4 will be held January 7-9, 2026. You can register at https://courses.efft.org/courses/2025-core-skills-colorado. October 15-18, 2025, you can do an Externship with James in beautiful Bend, Oregon. You can register at https://www.counseloregon.com. You can train with Ryan, as well as George Faller, doing a live and some time with James, at the annual Arkansas EFT Center externship. July 29-August 1, 2025, in person, in Fayetteville, Arkansas. https://www.arkansaseft.com/events/externship We would like to invite everyone to come hang out and learn with the SV team at the first-ever SV Focus Lab. This is an advanced, EFCT training intending to push the edge with a focus on nuance in application, illuminating EFT and Sue’s incredible model.” You can learn more and register by going to https://www.svfocuslab.com. Leading edge listeners who register before July 1 with the code svfocuslab.com/leadingedge get a 10% discount. To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!

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• 113. The Resistant Client Series: Bring it Forward to Work with The Live Emotion Under Resistance.

  Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Key Highlights: Counterintuitive approach: When clients become reactive, therapists should move towards the emotion, not away from it Reactivity is a signal of underlying fear and pain that needs acknowledgment The goal is to help clients organize and understand their emotional experience Main Points: Understanding Reactivity Reactivity indicates a need for emotional organization Therapists must first ground themselves to stay present Look for cues like voice changes, slower pace, and "yes" signaling Therapeutic Approach Move towards the reactivity with curiosity and empathy Co-create meaning with the client Help clients understand the attachment function of their emotional response Trust and Corrective Experience Develop trust that vulnerable emotions exist beneath resistance Be willing to take vulnerable steps before seeing the full result Learn through practice and experiencing successful interventions Practical Strategies: Validate the function of protective behaviors Slow down the process Become an "attachment interpreter" Closing Insight: EFT aims to help clients find flexibility in their reactive moments and connect with each other, not eliminate reactivity. Upcoming events, if you would like to train with James or Ryan… You can do a joint Core Skills (Colorado) with Lisa J. Palmer-Olsen & Dr. James Hawkins. Core Skills Modules 1 and 2 will be held October 8-10, 2025, and Core Skills Modules 3 and 4 will be held January 7-9, 2026. You can register at https://courses.efft.org/courses/2025-core-skills-colorado. October 15-18, 2025, you can do an Externship with James in beautiful Bend, Oregon. You can register at https://www.counseloregon.com. You can train with Ryan, as well as George Faller, doing a live and some time with James, at the annual Arkansas EFT Center externship. July 29-August 1, 2025, in person, in Fayetteville, Arkansas. https://www.arkansaseft.com/events/externship We would like to invite everyone to come hang out and learn with the SV team at the first-ever SV Focus Lab. This is an advanced, EFCT training intending to push the edge with a focus on nuance in application, illuminating EFT and Sue’s incredible model.” You can learn more and register by going to https://www.svfocuslab.com. Leading edge listeners who register before July 1 with the code svfocuslab.com/leadingedge get a 10% discount. To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!

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• 112. The Resistant Client Series: Repetitively Reflecting Their Attachment Dilemma

  Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. This "Push the Leading Edge" podcast episode explores the concept of the "Attachment Dilemma" in therapy, focusing on how therapists can effectively work with resistant clients. Hosts Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Reyna provide insights, personal stories, and practical techniques for understanding and navigating client resistance using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) principles. Conversation Outline: 1. Introduction - Upcoming EFT training events - Appreciation for EFT community leaders and volunteers 2. Attachment Dilemma Concept - Defining resistance in therapy - Metaphors: Bomb-sniffing dog, technology troubleshooting - Core idea: Clients are stuck between connection longing and protection strategies 3. Therapeutic Approach - Slow down the therapeutic process - Validate client's experience - Recognize there are "no good moves" in their current cycle - Demonstrate understanding of their stuck position 4. Demonstration Techniques - Exploring pursuer and withdrawer attachment patterns - Repetitive validation of the client's experience - Focusing on the emotional experience, not problem-solving 5. Key Takeaways - Trust the therapeutic process - Repeat understanding to help client's nervous system feel seen - Aim to help clients recognize their cyclical patterns The episode provides a deep dive into compassionate, nuanced therapeutic intervention for challenging client situations. To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together! SV Focus Lab-https://www.svfocuslab.com/ Training Opportunities with James.  Externship in Bend, Oregon - https://www.counseloregon.com/coeft/externship Core Skills in Hourston - https://hceft.org/events/ Core Skills in Boulder Colorado - https://courses.efft.org/courses/2025-core-skills-colorado Training Opportunities with Ryan.  Externship in Indiana - https://www.indyeft.com/general-7 Externship in Northwest Arkansas - https://www.arkansaseft.com/events/externship  

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• 111. The Resistant Client Series: Realize This is Dysregulation

  Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. James and Ryan discussed the importance of recognizing and working with clients' dysregulation, emphasizing the need for therapists to move towards dysregulation and validate clients' emotional experiences. They also discussed practical strategies for addressing dysregulation and the significance of emotional dysregulation in therapeutic processes. Introduction to Recognizing Dysregulation  Introduces the topic of recognizing and working with dysregulation in resistant clients.  And discuss the importance of capturing the moment of dysregulation and working with compassion and empathy.  Shares a personal anecdote about experiencing dysregulation during a flight, highlighting the importance of recognizing and addressing emotional dysregulation. Understanding Emotional Dysregulation  Explains emotional dysregulation, emphasizing that it is a common issue in resistant clients.  The importance of moving towards the dysregulation to address the underlying fear and pain.  A metaphor about flying to illustrate the experience of emotional dysregulation and the need for validation and support. The importance of training to recognize and respond effectively to emotional dysregulation in clients. Practical Strategies for Working with Dysregulation  Practical strategies for working with dysregulation, including capturing the moment and addressing the underlying fear and pain. A story about a client who experienced dysregulation during a session and how the therapist helped the client recognize and befriend their dysregulation. Emphasize the importance of meeting clients where they are and addressing their emotional needs. The importance of pushing clients to address their dysregulation in a controlled and supportive manner. The Role of Emotional Dysregulation in Therapy Emotional dysregulation is a natural part of the therapeutic process and should be addressed with compassion and understanding. It is important to recognize and address emotional dysregulation in clients to facilitate therapeutic change.  A story about a client who experienced dysregulation during a session and how the therapist helped the client recognize and address their emotional needs. The importance of training and practice in addressing emotional dysregulation effectively. The Importance of Self-Care for Therapists The importance of self-care for therapists who work with emotionally dysregulated clients.  The need for therapists to increase their capacity to be dysregulated and to practice self-care to maintain their well-being. Tips for self-care include taking breaks, practicing mindfulness, and seeking colleague support. Series Overview We are excited to announce the beginning of a new series focused on practical help when a client’s nervous system becomes entrenched and cannot open to their experience, their partner’s experience, or the clinical process. We want to help you with a clear frame of nuance and intentionality in this clinical experience. General Outline of How We Plan to Cover This Presentation Notice it and Asses It Accurately: Establishing Focus Get in Front of it and Contain it Realize it is Dysregulation: Track, Reflect, and Validate Spend A Whole Session of Curiosity About the Experience Show Impact and Cost- V:OUS Cost to Self, Cost to Partner(s), Cost to the Relationship Here & Now: Bring it Forward Make it Experiential: Get it Replaced. To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!

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