ADHD with Jenna Free

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Join the ADHD Regulation Groups waitlist here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/waitlist Chapters 00:00 Introduction: ADHD, Aging, and Dysregulation 01:00 Why ADHD Symptoms Feel Worse as You Age 03:00 What Dysregulation Looks Like During Perimenopause and Menopause 05:00 Three Ways to Support Yourself as You Age 08:00 Aging, Appearance, and Dysregulation 12:00 The Society Piece: Pressure on Women 15:00 Celebrity Examples: Linda Hamilton and Justine Bateman 18:00 It's Safe to Age Summary In this episode, I talk about why ADHD symptoms feel worse as you age - and it's not what you think. A big part of the ADHD aging conversation is hormones, perimenopause, and menopause. The ADHD brain relies heavily on estrogen for dopamine regulation, and when estrogen decreases, we become more dysregulated. A Harvard study showed that lowered estrogen equals an increased startle response - meaning we're more reactive, irritable, and emotionally flooded. This mimics what people call "worsening ADHD" but it's actually worsening dysregulation. This matters because if you think your ADHD is worse, you'll look for external tools, but what you actually need is regulation work. I walk through what dysregulation looks like during perimenopause and menopause (constantly on edge, quick to overwhelm, harder time focusing, sleep disruption) and share three ways to support yourself: regulation work (it takes longer but it's the anchor), radical permission for what you need (more rest, slowing down), and hormonal/medical support from your doctor. Then I dive into something that might get pushback: aging, appearance, and dysregulation. Dysregulated brains fear aging more because our nervous system sees every change as a threat. I share why I believe societal pressure plays a huge role in cosmetic procedures and anti-aging efforts, and how regulation changes our relationship with aging. I share examples from Linda Hamilton and Justine Bateman who've embraced aging confidently, and my own journey with cosmetic procedures I now regret that I did from dysregulation. The goal isn't to love aging, just to stop fearing it so much. Action Step This week, notice if you're feeling like your ADHD symptoms are getting worse. Ask yourself: is this my ADHD getting worse, or am I more dysregulated right now? If you're in perimenopause, menopause, or experiencing hormonal changes, recognize that what you're experiencing is heightened dysregulation - not a worsening brain. Start or double down on regulation work. It might take longer and feel harder (like lifting heavier weights at the gym), but it's still the thing that's going to make the biggest difference. Also notice: if you have fears about aging (visually, hormonally, or otherwise), ask yourself these questions: Is this danger or discomfort? Is this my preference or my fear? Does this choice come from safety or threat? Just observe. No judgment, just awareness. Takeaways ADHD symptoms feeling worse with age is actually worsening dysregulation - the ADHD brain relies on estrogen for dopamine regulation, and perimenopause/menopause decrease estrogen, making us more reactive and dysregulated What feels like worsening ADHD is your body's sense of safety shifting - the symptoms of ADHD and dysregulation are almost interchangeable, so regulation work becomes even more important as you age Three ways to support yourself: regulation work (the anchor that creates stability), radical permission for what you need (more rest, slowing down), and hormonal/medical support from your doctor Dysregulated brains fear aging more because our nervous system sees every change as a potential threat - regulated brains tolerate change better, including physical change Societal pressure on women to stay young impacts us more when we're dysregulated - the goal isn't to love aging, just to stop fearing it so much so you can make conscious choices instead of compulsive ones Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Chapters 00:00 Introduction: Meds and Regulation - Do They Go Together? 02:00 What ADHD Medication Actually Does 04:00 The Gas vs The Steering Wheel Analogy 06:00 Medication is a Tool, Not the Foundation 08:00 What ADHD Meds Can and Can't Do 10:00 Medication Can Magnify Your Current State 13:00 Trial and Error is Normal (And Expected) 15:00 Possible Side Effects and Who Can't Take Meds 17:00 Where Regulation Work Fits In Summary In this episode, I clarify my stance on ADHD medication and where it fits with regulation work. This isn't about whether you should or shouldn't take meds - that's deeply personal. But I want to give you context on what to expect and why both can work together beautifully. ADHD medication and regulation do two very different things. Medication is like gas in your tank - it helps with attention, impulsivity, working memory, and brain fog. But regulation provides the steering wheel, brakes, and pedals - it gives you the ability to actually maneuver with that energy. Medication doesn't regulate your nervous system, change fear-based beliefs, or get you out of fight or flight. I share results from a poll where the most common response about what meds help with was "I don't know" - which shows how important it is to get clear on what you want from medication. Medication can magnify the state you're in, so if you're dysregulated, stimulants might intensify that frantic energy. Whether meds work for you or not, regulation work should be the foundation - it helps every ADHDer with no side effects or downsides. Action Step This week, if you're on ADHD medication, get really honest with yourself: What do I want from my medication? Is it doing what I want it to do? How do I actually feel on it - not just "am I more productive" but am I present, am I happy, am I enjoying my day, or am I just anxious and getting more paperwork done? You are the expert on how it feels in your body. If you don't love how you feel, it doesn't mean meds aren't right for you or that you don't have ADHD - it might mean you need a dosage change or different type. Talk to your doctor about it. And whether you're on meds or not, start or continue regulation work as your foundation - it's accessible to everyone and helps with or without medication. Takeaways ADHD medication and regulation work together - meds are like gas in the tank (performance enhancer for brain functions), regulation is the steering wheel, brakes, and pedals (ability to maneuver that energy) Medication helps with attention, impulsivity, working memory, and brain fog, but it doesn't regulate your nervous system, change fear-based beliefs, or get you out of fight or flight Medication can magnify the state you're in - if you're dysregulated, stimulants might intensify that frantic energy rather than help Get clear on what you want from medication and whether it's actually doing that - you're the expert on how it feels in your body, not a chart or your doctor Regulation work is the foundation that helps every ADHDer with no side effects or downsides - whether you take meds or not, regulation should be the base everything else builds on Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups (starting January) - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/groups Chapters 00:00 Introduction: Worrying What People Think 01:00 The Fawn Response: A Safety Mechanism 03:00 The Trap of External Regulation 05:00 It's Safe to Be Misunderstood 07:00 My Garbage Bag Story: Regulation in Action 09:00 How Fawn Costs Us Our Lives 11:00 The Fear No Longer Drives the Bus 13:00 Practice: Who Am I Trying to Keep Safe? 16:00 Building Freedom Through Tiny Moments 18:00 Their Dysregulation Doesn't Have to Be Mine Summary In this episode, I talk about ADHD people pleasing and the fawn response - why worrying what people think isn't about being nice, it's a nervous system safety response. If you've ever changed what you were going to do because of what someone might think (even a stranger), this is for you. For people with ADHD and chronic dysregulation, the fawn response makes us believe that keeping everyone happy, approved of, and not upset is what keeps us safe. When we've lived in fight or flight for years, our body reads conflict, judgment, or criticism as life-threatening danger - even though logically we know it's not. I explain how this people pleasing pattern is actually external regulation, where we try to control what other people think so we can feel calmer and safer. But here's the trap: when we worry what people think, we're not actually hearing them - we're hearing ourselves and reacting to imaginary opinions as if they're facts. I share a personal story about taking out the garbage with a plastic bag on my head (conditioner treatment) when construction workers were outside, and how I caught myself in the fawn response and chose to do it anyway to show my nervous system I'm safe. The fawn response costs us a lot - we live smaller, shape our lives around imaginary opinions, delay what we want, and let fear dictate our decisions. When we start regulating, we stop needing other people's approval to feel safe. We can handle being misunderstood, judged, or criticized because we know we're safe regardless. This episode gives you a practice to start breaking down these walls and building freedom through tiny moments of choosing what you want to do instead of what feels safest. Action Step This week, catch yourself hesitating or about to change what you're doing because of what someone might think. Pause and ask: "Who am I trying to keep safe right now? What am I fearing?" Notice the specific worry - are you worried your coworker will think you're lazy if you take a break? That someone will judge you? Once you're aware, take one small step toward what you actually want to do. Push yourself just a little past that discomfort (not obliterating your comfort zone, just stretching it). Go grab that coffee, take that break, ask for that help. See if you can collect evidence that you're safe even when people might be thinking things about you. Remember: their potential thoughts are not dangerous. You are safe. Takeaways ADHD people pleasing isn't about being nice - it's the fawn response, a nervous system safety mechanism where your body believes keeping everyone happy is what keeps you safe When we worry what people think, we're not hearing them - we're hearing ourselves and reacting to imaginary opinions as if they're facts The fawn response costs us our lives - we live smaller, delay what we want, and let 10% (or way more) of our decisions be dictated by imaginary scenarios Real regulation means the fear no longer drives the bus - you can handle being misunderstood, judged, or criticized because you trust you're safe regardless Most people aren't thinking about you anyway - they're worried about what you think of them, and any judgment they do have is usually their dysregulation talking Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups (starting January) - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/groups Chapters 00:00 Introduction: How to Regulate For Real 01:00 Why Tips and Tricks Don't Actually Work 03:00 External vs Internal Regulation 05:00 Regulation Through Avoidance Isn't Real Regulation 07:00 Layer One: The Body (Nervous System Regulation) 09:00 Layer Two: The Mind (Thought and Belief Regulation) 11:00 Layer Three: Behavior (Balanced Action) 15:00 Why People Think Regulation Doesn't Work 18:00 You Don't Have to Do It Perfectly 20:00 What Real Change Looks Like 23:00 Start With the Foundation: Your Nervous System Summary In this episode, I break down how to actually regulate for real - not with tips, tricks, or surface-level ADHD coping strategies, but with deep, internal work that changes how you function. If you've ever felt frustrated by hearing "just regulate" without knowing what that actually means, or if you've tried breathing exercises and meditation but nothing has fundamentally changed, this episode is for you. I explain why ADHD regulation has been oversimplified by wellness culture into surface-level fixes like bubble baths and rigid routines, and why that approach doesn't create lasting change. Real regulation is internal, not external - it's not about what you do, it's about how you do it. I walk through the three layers of the ADHD regulation method: body (nervous system regulation where you teach your body it's safe), mind (rewiring fear-based beliefs formed in survival mode), and behavior (shifting from extreme all-or-nothing patterns to balanced, sustainable action). I also address why people think regulation doesn't work - expecting instant results instead of gradual re-patterning, confusing calming down with becoming regulated, or stopping at just the nervous system piece without doing the thought and behavior work. This is not a quick fix. It takes time and repetition, just like going to the gym. But the time will pass anyway, and in a year you can either have an entirely new experience of life or continue the dysregulation cycle. I share my own journey and what regulation has done for my daily life, and give you the foundation to start with. Action Step This week, start with the foundation: nervous system regulation. Throughout your day, notice the physical sensations telling you you're dysregulated - tense shoulders around your ears, holding your breath or shallow breathing, rushing around, or sitting in overwhelm and paralysis. When you catch yourself, interrupt it: slow down your walking, drop your shoulders, take a deep breath. You're "pretending" to be a regulated person (someone not being chased by a bear), and over time your nervous system will start to believe it's true. Don't expect one deep breath to fix everything - it's about repeatedly interrupting the pattern. Remember: to sleep, we first have to pretend to sleep. Same with regulation. Takeaways Real regulation is internal, not external - it's not about bubble baths, rigid routines, or perfect habits, it's about retraining your nervous system, thoughts, and behavior from the inside out The three layers of ADHD regulation: body (teaching your nervous system you're safe), mind (rewiring fear-based beliefs like "I'm behind, I need to catch up"), and behavior (shifting from extreme all-or-nothing to balanced, consistent action) External regulation (organizing your space, doing yoga, strict routines) is like sprinkles on icing - helpful but not the meat of the work Regulation takes time and repetition, just like building muscle at the gym - one deep breath won't regulate you, just like one workout won't make you fit You can only regulate in the present moment, and there's only ever one thing to do - interrupt the pattern when you notice it, then do it again, and again Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Take the free Dysregulation Quiz here - https://adhdwithjennafree.typeform.com/adhdquiz Register for the ADHD at Work 2.0 Workshop - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdwork Chapters 00:00 Introduction: ADHD at Work and the Severance Episode 01:00 When the Mental Boundary Between Work and Life Disappears 03:00 Why Everything Feels Urgent When You're Dysregulated 05:00 You Can't Work Your Way to Peace 06:00 Signs You've Lost Your Work-Life Severance 08:00 Regulating Your Body at Work and at Home 10:00 The Beliefs Behind Your Urgency 13:00 Regulating Your Behavior: Finding Balance 16:00 My Personal Experience with Work Boundaries 19:00 What Regulation Actually Looks Like 21:00 ADHD at Work 2.0 Workshop Announcement Summary In this episode, I talk about ADHD at work and how to actually put work in its place - not with better time management or productivity hacks, but with nervous system regulation. If you've ever been at your kid's soccer game and suddenly remembered an email you should have sent, and now your whole body feels uncomfortable until you send it, this is for you. I'm calling this "the Severance episode" after the TV show, because for ADHDers struggling with ADHD burnout and work-life balance, the mental boundary between work and life can completely disappear. I break down why ADHD makes it so hard to stop thinking about work, even when you desperately want to rest. When you're dysregulated, everything feels urgent - you can't stop thinking about work at home, but then when it's actually work time, you might be stuck in ADHD procrastination and overwhelm. It's the worst trap. I explain how working from dysregulation creates more dysregulation, so you'll never work yourself into peace. I also share the three types of regulation you need: body (slowing down, breathing, relaxing tension), mind (challenging beliefs like "if I don't stay on top of this, everything will fall apart"), and behavior (creating consistency instead of extreme work patterns). I share my own journey from obsessively thinking about work 24/7 to now having natural boundaries and actually feeling done at the end of the day. This episode will help you understand why ADHD at work feels so exhausting and what you can actually do about it. Action Step This week, pick one area to start practicing regulation. For your body: slow your walking between meetings or around your house, bring your shoulders down from your ears, and check if you're breathing or holding your breath. For your mind: notice when you feel urgent and ask yourself "what belief is driving this urgency?" Is it "if I don't stay on top of this, everything will fall apart" or "if I'm not thinking about it, I'll forget something"? For your behavior: set a quitting time and actually stop, regardless of how much you got done. Notice when you think "just one more email" - that's dysregulation trying to externally regulate. Start small with whichever feels most doable. Takeaways For dysregulated ADHD brains, the mental boundary between work and life can completely disappear When you're dysregulated, everything feels urgent - this is why you can't stop thinking about work You can't work your way to peace - working from dysregulation creates more dysregulation Three types of regulation: body (slow down, breathe, relax tension), mind (challenge beliefs behind urgency), behavior (create consistency instead of extremes) Regulation gives you the internal ability to turn work off when you want rest, and turn it on when you want to work - that's the real skill Connect with Me Instagram TikTok