SLP 496: Open Conversations on Life, Love and Legacy with Ben Allan
‘Just have really open honest communication with your kids, don’t shy away from subjects. Don’t shy away from conversations. I really try to maintain that with my own kids to not really make anything taboo with them. I want to have really open conversations. I know some parents might be awkward talking about teenage suicide and self-harm, those kind of mental health and emotional concerns that we have with the youth. But don’t be scared to talk to your kids about that. Actually, if anyone has gone through mental first aid, especially youth mental first aid, they train you to be really up front about an issue like suicide and to ask really direct questions.’ ~ Ben Allan
In this heartfelt and thought-provoking episode, Ben Allan – a devoted father of nearly six, professional photographer, musician, and passionate advocate for men’s mental health – shares the story of his life and the lessons he’s learned along the way. From his transition from Newcastle to the Sunshine Coast and building a successful photography business, to his experiences in parenting teenagers and navigating co-parenting, Ben brings depth, honesty, and humour to every topic.
He opens up about the challenges of losing and regaining custody of his children, the emotional toll of guilt and shame, and the transformational power of self-awareness and personal growth. He shares the emotional layers behind wedding photography, capturing raw and authentic moments over posed perfection.
This conversation explores the impact of social media on self-worth, the complexities of raising teens in today’s digital world, and the value of conscious parenting and emotional intelligence. Ben’s insights into relationships, the difference between love and deep care, and the importance of self-love and inner work make this episode a truly inspiring listen.
A powerful conversation filled with wisdom, compassion, and hope – with a shared vision to continue these vital discussions and make a difference in the lives of others, especially men navigating life, love, and legacy.
Ben Allan was born in Sydney, raised in Newcastle, and currently lives on the beautiful Sunshine Coast in Queensland, Australia, with his partner and 5 (yes, five!) gorgeous children.
Never one to sit still, Ben has been an active small business owner and developer since his early 20’s. This has included a range of business, technology, creative and social endeavours. Ben’s current businesses include: Ignite Respite & Support: an NDIS support provider working with children and teens. Two Hearts Photo + Video: wedding photography & video servicing the Sunshine Coast, Gold Coast, Brisbane and beyond. The 40 Year Old Fuckup: A podcast exploring life in all its messy glory.
Ben holds a BA Social Science (Social Welfare), a Diploma of Counselling, and is trained in Therapeutic Crisis Intervention and Youth Mental Health First Aid. He is currently completing a Juris Doctor at Griffith University, with the aims of working in the family and criminal law systems.
Yet there is a creative side to him that yearns to be fulfilled, with a love of music, photography and video production, you might also catch Ben playing a gig at a local bar, shooting a wedding, or filming a music video clip.
His definition of Self Love is making decisions and doing actions you are proud of. It is being true and authentic to yourself and doing things every day that you are proud of.
His favourite quote is:
This too shall pass.
Links to follow:
Website: https://www.benallan.com.au/
Website – Aligned Weddings: https://www.alignedweddings.com.au/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/benallanlife/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ben.a.allan
Quotes:
I truly believe having kids is one of the most fulfilling things you could ever do.
I have always been very creative, we are all multi-faceted really.
Learning is an addiction of mine.
I live and breathe by my calendar, if it’s not in there it doesn’t happen!
There is a real difference to loving someone and being in love.
I am looking for those moments of connection.
Our job is to create those moments and give them a moment to connect.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
There is more than just the surface of what we see.
Go easy on yourself as a parent and on your kids, we are all navigating this together.
Have really open conversations with your kids don’t shy away from the hard conversations.
Build an environment and a relationship of trust.
I want them to be educated and aware of what is out there.
Adolescence is a very new thing in our culture.
Our youth need guidance.
It is important to maintain boundaries.
Remain centred in yourself.
What am I thinking, what am I feeling and how am I going to react to this situation.
Self-awareness and self-grounding is so much better when you remain calm.
Every phase of parenting is fantastic and fascinating.
Fear is a cage we put ourselves in.
When you lose big, it puts you into a state to evolve or die.
This too shall pass.
Don’t be passive, do the work, see the therapist, read the books.
SELF LOVE PODCAST SPONSOR LINKS
THANKYOU FOR LISTENING… If you would like to share your feedback on this podcast please head to my Facebook and Instagram pages below. Thanks so much if you take the time to give me a 5-star rating on iTunes so that others find this podcast easily and I sincerely appreciate all of your feedback and comments. It makes it all worthwhile as I know this podcast can plant a seed where big things can indeed grow!
If you would love to work with Kim one on one coaching or be a part of her Self Love & Wellness Mentorship Program to continue to master the art of self-love click here – www.kimmorrison.com
SIGNATURE ‘ESSENTIAL SELF CARE WEEKEND’ EVENT with Kim Morrison
Immerse yourself in a whole weekend for you, dive into the powers of your physical, mental and emotional wellbeing and how essential oils can create magic and change in your life. Learn the importance of self-care and what it means to indulge and recharge every day… after all you deserve it!
Click here for more information and locations for your Standard or VIP ticket – https://twenty8.com/events-and-workshops/
PODCAST SPONSOR:
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DISCOUNT CODE:
Discount Code for SLP Listeners – selflovepodcast
LINKS:
Twenty8 Essentials
Website: https://twenty8.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/twenty8essentials
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/twenty.8.essential/
Kim Morrison Website: www.kimmorrison.com
Essential Self Mastery Program: https://www.kimmorrison.com/essential-self-mastery
Essential Self Care Weekend: https://twenty8.com/events-and-workshops/
The Art Of Self Love – https://twenty8.com/product/the-art-of-self-love/
Self-Love & Wellness Mentoring Program – https://www.kimmorrison.com/mentorship
Essential Oils 101 Program – https://www.kimmorrisontraining.com/essential-oil-101
Kim Morrison Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimmorrison28/
Kim Morrison Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KimMorrisonTraining
MUSIC INTRO & OUTRO
Many thanks to Wes and Charlotte Carr – https://wesleydeanmusic.com/
New Zealand