The Anxious Achiever

What if the stress you feel at work isn’t just about deadlines or difficult bosses, but about your attachment style? In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Jack Hinman, founder and executive director of Engage Young Adult Transitions, to talk about how the patterns you develop in early childhood show up in your leadership, ambition, anxiety, and burnout. We break down secure, preoccupied, and avoidant attachment styles, how they influence the way you handle feedback and uncertainty, and why your “relationship operating system” doesn’t stop at home. Tune in to understand your patterns and learn how to lead from connection instead of fear.

Check out our sponsors:

Northwest Registered Agent - Protect your privacy, build your brand and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes! Visit https://www.northwestregisteredagent.com/achieverfree

Shopify - Sign up for a $1 per month trial, just go to http://shopify.com/anxiousachiever

Talkiatry - Head to http://talkiaitry.com/achiever and complete the short assessment to get matched with an in network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.

Working Genius - Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code ACHIEVER at working http://genius.com

Brevo - Meet brevo, the all in one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers, boost engagement and grow your business smarter. Go to brevo.com/achiever and use code ACHIEVER50 for 50% off. 

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 The heartbreaking monkey experiment that shaped attachment theory.

06:30 What's the difference among secure, preoccupied, avoidant, and disorganized styles?

10:00 What happens when a preoccupied employee has an avoidant boss.

11:15 How does avoidant attachment show up in leadership?

15:45 What “secure” actually looks like at work.

18:45 How to “own the dynamic” in difficult workplace relationships.

20:30 Self-awareness is the foundation of good leadership.

23:00 Why uncertainty and change activate attachment patterns.

25:15 Why connection is both the outcome and the intervention.

28:45 What happens when two anxious leaders feed each other’s stress.

31:15 Why “anchors” are essential for healing attachment patterns.

34:45 Tools to regulate attachment triggers.

Resources + Links

Learn more about Dr. Jack Hinman and Engage Young Adult Transitions HERE!

Learn more about Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skills and resources HERE!

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube 

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

What if the biggest obstacle to your performance isn’t your workload or your leadership challenges, but your own mind? In this episode, I sit down with Shirzad Chamine, founder and CEO of Positive Intelligence, to talk about the habits many anxious achievers rely on to succeed (i.e. hypervigilance, perfectionism, control, and constant striving), but that can drain energy, clarity, and confidence over time. Shirzad breaks down how overused strengths turn into self-sabotage, and the 10-second practice that helps you shift from stress and reactivity into calm, focused leadership. Get ready to learn how to work with your mind instead of against it.

Check out our sponsors:

Northwest Registered Agent - Protect your privacy, build your brand and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes! Visit https://www.northwestregisteredagent.com/achieverfree

Shopify - Sign up for a $1 per month trial, just go to http://shopify.com/anxiousachiever

Talkiatry - Head to http://talkiaitry.com/achiever and complete the short assessment to get matched with an in network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.

Working Genius - Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code ACHIEVER at working http://genius.com

Brevo - Meet brevo, the all in one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers, boost engagement and grow your business smarter. Go to brevo.com/achiever and use code ACHIEVER50 for 50% off. 

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why your mind can feel like your greatest ally and your biggest obstacle.

06:15 The 3 ways you judge yourself, others, and circumstances.

12:00 What's the difference between helpful emotions and self-sabotage?

14:15 Can anger and stress ever be productive?

18:00 The biological reason stress creates tunnel vision in high-stakes decisions.

20:00 What’s the real cost of overusing your strengths as a leader?

26:15 The shift that turns a leader’s vigilance from a strength into a liability.

31:15 The 5 Sage powers that improve wellbeing and results.

38:30 A 10-second PQ rep to calm anxiety fast.

41:00 Active grounding practices for restless or anxious minds.

48:00 How the Sage perspective turns any circumstance into a gift or opportunity.

56:45 Why hyper-achievement disconnects self-worth from success.

1:00:30 The shift from conditional to unconditional self-acceptance.

Resources + Links

Take the FREE Positive Intelligence assessment HERE

Get your copy of Shirzad Chamine’s book Positive Intelligence: Why Only 20% of Teams and Individuals Achieve Their True Potential and How You Can Achieve Yours HERE

Learn more about Positive Intelligence programs HERE

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube 

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Shirzad on LinkedIn @shirzadchamine

Do difficult conversations keep you up at night, or do they make you want to avoid conflict altogether? In this episode, I sit down with workplace conflict expert Amy Gallo, author of Getting Along, to talk about how healthy conflict actually strengthens trust, decision-making, and leadership confidence. We dive into how our brains get emotionally hijacked during difficult conversations, how avoidance creates “conflict debt,” and why learning to stay grounded in discomfort may be one of the most important leadership skills we can build. Tune in to learn how to face conflict calmly to reduce anxiety and make you a more confident leader.

Check out our sponsors:

Northwest Registered Agent - Protect your privacy, build your brand, and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes! Visit https://www.northwestregisteredagent.com/achieverfree

Shopify - Sign up for a $1 per month trial, just go to http://shopify.com/anxiousachiever

Talkiatry - Head to http://talkiaitry.com/achiever and complete the short assessment to get matched with an in network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.

Working Genius - Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code ACHIEVER at working http://genius.com

Brevo - Meet brevo, the all in one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers, boost engagement and grow your business smarter. Go to brevo.com/achiever and use code ACHIEVER50 for 50% off. 

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why conflict feels especially hard for anxious achievers.

04:30 How avoiding conflict increases anxiety.

06:15 What happens during an emotional “amygdala hijack”?

08:00 The cost of conflict avoidance and conflict debt.

10:30 How difficult conversations build confidence over time.

12:30 What is the role of shame and fear in workplace conflict?

17:00 How to practice conflict safely in low-stakes situations.

22:30 The 4-step framework for handling conflict better.

27:30 Finding shared goals during disagreement.

32:15 What to do when conflict keeps you up at night.

34:15 How to repair conversations that went badly.

Resources + Links

Get your copy of Amy’s book Getting Along HERE

Learn more about Amy Gallo HERE

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube 

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Amy: on LinkedIn @amyegallo + Instagram @amyegallo

For years, leadership has been associated with charisma, confidence, and speaking the loudest in the room. But what if some of the most powerful leadership traits are actually quiet ones? In this episode, I’m joined by leadership expert and author Jennifer Kahnweiler to talk about the strengths of introverted leaders. We break down the misconceptions around introversion, why many successful leaders are secretly introverted, and how preparation, listening, and thoughtful presence can become leadership superpowers. Tune in to rethink what effective leadership looks like and learn how quiet strengths can create lasting influence.

Check out our sponsors:

Northwest Registered Agent - Protect your privacy, build your brand and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes! Visit ⁠https://www.northwestregisteredagent.com/achieverfree⁠

Shopify - Sign up for a $1 per month trial, just go to ⁠http://shopify.com/anxiousachiever⁠

Talkiatry - Head to ⁠http://talkiaitry.com/achiever⁠ and complete the short assessment to get matched with an in network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.

Working Genius - Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code ACHIEVER at working ⁠http://genius.com⁠

Brevo - Meet brevo, the all in one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers, boost engagement and grow your business smarter. Go to ⁠brevo.com/achiever⁠ and use code ACHIEVER50 for 50% off. 

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why introverted leadership is often misunderstood.

03:45 What is an introverted leader?

06:00 What has changed and what hasn’t for introverts at work.

10:30 Are you adapting or just exhausted?

14:45 The 4 P’s of introverted leadership.

18:30 Why telling your team you’re an introvert is a leadership hack.

21:30 Why quiet men face unique workplace bias.

27:15 The connection between introversion, anxiety, and performance.

33:00 How introverted leaders prepare for high-stakes meetings.

35:15 Techniques to make meetings more introvert-friendly.

39:15 How giving teammates a heads-up increases participation.

44:30 How to show presence in meetings without talking more.

47:45 The introvert's guide to not burning out in a hybrid world.

Resources + Links

Learn more about Jennifer Kahnweiler ⁠HERE⁠

Listen to Jennifer’s podcast: ⁠The Introvert Ally Podcast⁠

Get a copy of my book - ⁠The Anxious Achiever⁠

Watch the podcast on ⁠YouTube⁠ 

Find more resources on our website ⁠morraam.com⁠

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn ⁠@morraaronsmele⁠ + Instagram ⁠@morraam⁠

Follow Jennifer: on LinkedIn ⁠@jenniferkahnweiler⁠ + Instagram ⁠@jenniferkahnweiler

Negotiation isn’t just about boardrooms and big deals. It’s every time you ask for what you need that brings up fear, self-doubt, and a rush of emotion that can derail the whole conversation. In this episode, I talk with former FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss and negotiation expert Moshe Cohen about why so many of us dread conflict, how curiosity can quiet anxiety, and how to use tactical empathy as a strategic tool. We also share the tools to slow down emotional hijack and manage rejection. Tune in to learn how to regulate your emotions and negotiate with clarity instead of fear.

Check out our sponsors:

Northwest Registered Agent - Protect your privacy, build your brand and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes! Visit https://www.northwestregisteredagent.com/achieverfree

Shopify - Sign up for a $1 per month trial, just go to http://shopify.com/anxiousachiever

Talkiatry - Head to http://talkiaitry.com/achiever and complete the short assessment to get matched with an in network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.

Working Genius - Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code ACHIEVER at working http://genius.com

Brevo - Meet brevo, the all in one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with 

customers, boost engagement and grow your business smarter. Go to brevo.com/achiever and use code ACHIEVER50 for 50% off. 

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why negotiation is happening in almost every interaction.

04:45 What are the 3 types of handling conflict?

09:15 How curiosity shuts down fear in your brain.

12:15 Is asking questions in general a good technique in a negotiation?

16:30 What empathy really means in negotiation.

23:15 How bonding and trust influence negotiation outcomes.

26:15 Why you should talk less and listen more in negotiation.

32:00 How naming your emotions reduces their intensity.

38:00 How often does that anxiety show up during a negotiation exercise?

41:00 Tips to slow down time when you feel emotionally hijacked.

46:15 What is the listening triangle?

50:30 How much advice is too much in a negotiation?

57:00 How to build your rejection muscle.

01:00:00 The stories you tell yourself before and during a negotiation

01:02:00 How knowing your BATNA lowers the stakes and raises confidence.

Resources + Links

Get the Anxious Achiever Healthy High Achieving App - studio.com/morra

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube 

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Chris: on LinkedIn @christophervoss + Instagram @thefbinegotiator

Follow Moshe: on LinkedIn @moshecohen