Divorce Coaches Academy

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We break down escalation loops in co‑parenting, why they entrench, and how divorce coaches can interrupt them with practical, evidence‑informed tools. We share the pause protocol, BIF writing, nervous‑system resets, and real‑time awareness checks that end reactive volleys and protect the long game.

• definition of escalation loops and why they persist in divorce
• reactive communication and negative reciprocity mechanics
• amygdala hijack and dysregulation as baseline conditions
• pattern entrenchment and confirmation bias reinforcing the story
• the pause protocol as an active strategy
• choosing structured channels and using BIF for concise replies
• loop awareness questions to stop mid‑exchange
• regulate first, respond second using body‑based tools
• reframing the real goal from winning arguments to stable co‑parenting
• the coach’s role as steady, strategic partner

If today’s episode was useful to you, please share it with a colleague, leave a review wherever you listen to your podcast, or come find me at the DCA community. And if you would like to learn more about the training we provide to support the professional practice of divorce coaches, please check us out at divorcecoachesacademy.com

This episode includes a sponsored segment featuring Soberlink, a court-recognized alcohol monitoring system designed to support families navigating divorce and co-parenting. Soberlink provides objective, real-time accountability that helps reduce conflict, increase trust, and support safer parenting arrangements when alcohol use is a concern. Learn more about Soberlink and their professional resources at soberlink.com.
Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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We explore why love and conflict can coexist during divorce and how skill, not intention, changes outcomes. We show how awareness, regulation, and alignment transform automatic reactions into choices that protect kids and shape a healthier family system.

• acknowledging care while choosing to leave
• love as orientation, not conflict strategy
• conditioned patterns and nervous system activation
• awareness of triggers and pre‑reaction cues
• regulation tools that create space and choice
• alignment of behavior with future goals
• shifting family dynamics by changing one response
• redefining love as practiced stability and restraint

If you are interested in learning more about the professional practice of divorce coaching as a form of dispute resolution, please do not hesitate to check us out at Divorce CoachesAcademy.com

This episode includes a sponsored segment featuring Soberlink, a court-recognized alcohol monitoring system designed to support families navigating divorce and co-parenting. Soberlink provides objective, real-time accountability that helps reduce conflict, increase trust, and support safer parenting arrangements when alcohol use is a concern. Learn more about Soberlink and their professional resources at soberlink.com.
Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)
The loudest stories are getting the clicks, but are they serving clients? In this episode, we dig into a growing trend in divorce coaching—marketing that centers personal divorce and betrayal narratives—and examine how story-first positioning blurs boundaries, preloads expectations, and weakens trust with clients and referral partners. 
Lived experience can spark a calling, yet without training, supervision, and clear standards of practice, narrative becomes a substitute for competence instead of context for care.

We share a colleague’s candid market signal about boundary issues on social platforms and unpack why it matters for a profession that’s maturing under increased scrutiny. From the collapse of experience and expertise to the downstream effects on decision quality, we map the operational risks when coaches promise resonance over results. 
We also take a hard look at narrative-led training programs that elevate a founder’s story into “methodology,” and we explain how that shift erodes self-regulation, turns certification into symbolism, and confuses consumers who cannot see the difference between ADR-aligned coaching and scaled storytelling.

Then we offer a path forward. We outline how to right-size personal stories—context, not credential—and restore professional sequencing: my experience led me here, and my training allows me to help you. We argue for parity with family law professions where credibility rests on ethics, restraint, and competency, not disclosure. 
Expect practical framing you can use today, including a simple audit question for your website and messaging: if your personal story vanished, would your professional value still be clear? The future of divorce coaching depends on discipline over drama and structure over spectacle; clarity compounds trust.

If this conversation resonates, subscribe, share with a colleague, and leave a review. Your feedback helps push the profession toward higher standards and better outcomes for clients navigating divorce.
Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)
The fastest way to erode trust in divorce coaching is to leave the role undefined. In this episode, we dig into why standards of practice aren’t bureaucracy—they’re the backbone that makes our work predictable, referable, and genuinely useful inside family law, mediation, and collaborative practice. When coaches adopt a clear, ADR-aligned framework, we shift from personality-driven promises to process-driven outcomes that protect clients, respect boundaries, and earn credibility with attorneys and mediators.

We unpack the hard questions that clients and professionals shouldn’t have to guess at: What does a divorce coach do? Where does the role stop? How do we avoid confusing coaching with therapy, legal advice, or mediation? You’ll hear a real case that’s popping up across the field: coaches advertising that they “write parenting plans.” 
We explain why that crosses into legal drafting and decision authority, and we show the standards-aligned alternative—helping clients identify interests and needs, apply cognitive empathy to understand the other parent’s priorities, center children’s developmental realities, and craft interest-based proposals that can be negotiated for buy-in. That’s not document creation; it’s decision-making capacity building.

We also share practical steps to operationalize standards: publish them on your site as a professional anchor, weave them into intake and client agreements for informed consent, and use shared language that mirrors how attorneys, mediators, and therapists think about roles and boundaries. Along the way, we talk candidly about scope drift, social media pressure, and how ad hoc practices weaken referrals and credibility. If you’re ready to raise the bar through training, mentorship, and case consultation, these guidelines offer a path from “how I do it” to “how our profession operates.”

If this resonates, read the DCA Standards of Practice, integrate them into your materials, and share them with your referral partners. 
Subscribe, leave a review, and share with a colleague.
This episode includes a sponsored segment featuring Soberlink, a court-recognized alcohol monitoring system designed to support families navigating divorce and co-parenting. Soberlink provides objective, real-time accountability that helps reduce conflict, increase trust, and support safer parenting arrangements when alcohol use is a concern. Learn more about Soberlink and their professional resources at soberlink.com.
Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)
Fair can feel like justice. In divorce, it often becomes a trap. In this episode, we sat down with attorney and managing partner Sara Marler to explore why “I just want what’s fair” derails strategy, inflates costs, and delays peace—and how a trauma-informed, whole-person approach helps clients pivot toward outcomes they can actually live with. Sara opens the curtain on what courts really weigh under standards like “just and equitable,” why judges prioritize clarity over grievance, and how stories of betrayal still matter when they are used to guide better decisions rather than to fuel a courtroom campaign.

Together, we map the gap between emotional fairness and legal reality, then show how to close it with reframing, education, and the right team. You’ll hear how validating a client’s experience builds trust, how divorce coaches reduce legal fees by handling the emotional heavy lifting, and why amicable and collaborative professionals consistently deliver faster, more sustainable results than “shark” tactics. We also talk practical tools—mindfulness, targeted parenting classes, curated resources—that help parents stop scorekeeping and design plans centered on children’s needs, not adult ego.

If you’re navigating separation or advising clients through it, this conversation offers a clear path from conflict to closure: focus on what you can control, choose resolution over vindication, and measure success by stability, not revenge. Divorce splits one household into two; it won’t look the same, and that’s okay. The goal is a livable outcome that protects your kids, your wallet, and your future self. 
Subscribe, share this episode and leave us a review to help others find us. 
To learn more about Sara visit her practice website at: https://marlerlawpartners.com/
This episode includes a sponsored segment featuring Soberlink, a court-recognized alcohol monitoring system designed to support families navigating divorce and co-parenting. Soberlink provides objective, real-time accountability that helps reduce conflict, increase trust, and support safer parenting arrangements when alcohol use is a concern. Learn more about Soberlink and their professional resources at soberlink.com.
Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]