The Rollercoaster Podcast

What happens when the gun fires… but you wake up anyway?

In this episode of The Roller Coaster Podcast, I sit down with Nick Rossborough, a former professional fighter who lost his identity, his marriage, and nearly his life. One night, alone on a mountain with a pistol in his hand, Nick made a decision he believed would end the pain. But something happened that shouldn’t be possible. And moments later, a small voice from inside his house changed everything.

Nick takes us inside the darkest night of his life, the divorce, the identity collapse, the silent suffering so many men hide, and the long road back through trauma healing, breathwork, purpose, and learning to love himself again.

This isn’t just a survival story.
It’s a wake-up call.

If you’ve ever felt lost, numb, or ready to give up, this conversation is for you.

Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a comment below. You’re not alone.

Key Moments:
0:00 I Put the Gun to My Head
3:07 Divorce, Heartbreak, and the Breaking Point
6:30 “Dad, I Made You Cookies”
9:00 When Losing My Identity Destroyed Me
12:25 Why Men Bottle Pain Until They Explode
15:28 Reading the Bible in a Week While Falling Apart
19:08 Vowing Never to Hit Rock Bottom Again
21:52 Loving Someone When You Can’t Love Yourself
23:55 Breathwork Visions That Changed Everything
27:32 The Oxygen Mask Rule That Rewired My Life
30:46 Here’s How I Escaped Trauma
33:13 The Real Reason Men Reach the Edge
35:35 How Do You Find a Reason to Stay Alive?
38:18 Meeting the Version of Myself I Abandoned
41:07 The Bullet That Killed the Old Me
43:25 Becoming a Man Who Needs No Validation
45:50 Facing Fear Through Plant Medicine
49:48 Why Human Connection Saves Lives
52:06 Love, Empathy, and Healing Without Medication

What do you do when your worst fear comes true… and no one even knows the truth?

In this episode of The Roller Coaster Podcast, I sit down with Adriana Sansam, a mother whose life changed forever when her husband died alone in a hotel room from an accidental overdose. One moment he was on a work trip. The next, she was racing for answers, convinced something was wrong before anyone confirmed it.

Adriana opens up about loving a recovering addict, hiding his addiction from everyone, and the devastating phone call that left her raising three young children alone. But this isn’t just a story about addiction and grief. It’s about breaking the stigma, telling the truth, and turning shame into purpose.

If you’ve been touched by addiction, mental health struggles, loss, or single parenting, this conversation will stay with you.

Listen now. Share this with someone who needs it. And subscribe for more stories that change lives.

Key Moments:
0:00 “I Knew Something Was Wrong”
3:12 Married to a Recovering Addict
6:05 The Phone Call That Confirmed My Fear
9:02 “He’s Dead”, Hearing the Words
12:10 Who He Was Beyond the Addiction
15:08 Understanding the Mind of an Addict
18:04 Explaining His Death to Our 5-Year-Old
21:06 When Shame Turned Into Silence
24:18 The Message That Changed Everything
27:30 Why I Finally Told the Truth
30:12 Did He Have a Reason to Keep Going?
33:40 When the Past Blocks the Future
36:10 “I Don’t Need More, I Need You”
39:05 Speaking to Him After His Death
42:18 A Message to Fathers Battling Addiction
45:30 Watching My Son Look for His Dad

Guest Info:
IG: adrianasansam (https://www.instagram.com/adrianasansam/)

What happens when the thing that defines you is taken away in a single moment?

On this episode of The Roller Coaster Podcast, I sit down with Mahi Crabbe, a former full-time musician who nearly lost his life in a brutal rock-crawling accident that crushed his hand and shattered his identity as an artist on November 3, 2018.

In a matter of seconds, Mahi went from touring and playing sold-out shows to lying in an ambulance, convinced his career was over. The injury didn’t just threaten his ability to play guitar, it forced him to confront deeper questions about purpose, faith, manhood, and how to provide for the family he always dreamed of building.

We talk about the night everything changed, the fear of starting over, the anger he carried toward God, and how losing his “guitar hand” ultimately led him to build an entirely new life as a business owner and father.

If you’ve ever had your plans ripped away, your identity shaken, or your faith tested, this conversation will hit home.

Watch this episode to see how losing everything became the beginning of something bigger.

Key Moments:
0:00 The Day I Lost My Hand
3:02 My Hand Was Hanging By Skin
6:05 Life Flashing Before My Eyes
9:10 “That’s His Guitar Hand”
12:36 Waking Up, My Identity Was Gone
15:32 I Couldn’t Be A Musician Anymore
18:39 From Hospital Bed To Truck Driver
21:30 Growing Up Without A Father
24:23 Becoming The Man I Never Had
26:50 The Night That Changed My Faith
29:40 From Leaving Church To Returning
33:03 Why God Took My Hand
35:41 My Family Came Back To Church
37:55 From Homeless To Business Owner
40:14 Why Hawaii Heals The Soul
42:49 My Message To Every Man Watching

Guest Info:
IG: @mahilive (https://www.instagram.com/mahilive/)

What happens when faith meets unimaginable loss and the miracle doesn’t come the way you prayed for it?

In this deeply raw episode of The Roller Coaster Podcast, I sit down with Shayna Weston, a woman whose life was shattered by a relentless sequence of grief that few could survive. In the span of a single year, Shayna walked beside her brother as he fought terminal cancer, held onto hope for a miracle, whispered goodbye as he took his final breath, then returned home only to lose her beloved dog… and shortly after, face her father’s devastating stage four pancreatic cancer diagnosis.

This conversation isn’t about tidy answers or surface-level faith. It’s about the brutal reality of grief, the anger we feel toward God, the moments we bargain, break, and beg and the quiet, unexpected ways healing and redemption can still emerge.

Shayna opens up about caregiving, anticipatory grief, losing multiple loved ones, wrestling with faith, forgiveness, and what it truly means to surrender when control is gone. It’s honest, heartbreaking, and somehow still filled with hope.

Watch this episode to understand grief on a deeper level and if you’ve ever lost someone, questioned your faith, or felt crushed by loss, this conversation will remind you that you’re not alone.

Key Moments:
0:00 The Call That Changed Everything
3:14 “You Have One Week Left”
6:07 When Hope And Reality Collided
9:21 The Moment I Knew He Was Dying
12:08 Singing Through Terminal Cancer
15:02 Doctors Said It Was Impossible
18:36 The Treatment That Shouldn’t Have Worked
21:48 When I Began Fighting God
24:31 “I’m Scared To Die”
27:26 Choosing Faith Over Fear
30:19 The Breath That Never Came Back
33:08 Watching My Brother Take His Last Breath
36:11 Grief Hits In Slow Motion
39:04 The Silence That Broke Our Family
42:12 Losing My Dog Right After Losing Him
45:03 When Grief Turned Into Anger
48:29 The Diagnosis That Came Next
51:42 Stage Four Pancreatic Cancer
54:56 “I Don’t Want To Fight Anymore”
58:08 Learning To Let Go

Guest Info:
IG: @shay_weston_ (https://www.instagram.com/shay_weston_/)

What happens when suicide keeps showing up in your life… before you’re even old enough to understand it?

In this episode of The Rollercoaster Podcast, I sit down with Stanley Stark, a man whose life has been shaped by loss, silence, and hard truths most men never say out loud. From losing a close friend as a teenager to the devastating phone call that his own father had taken his life, Stanley opens up about how unprocessed grief, broken family dynamics, and emotional isolation quietly pushed him toward recklessness, anger, and self-destruction.

But this conversation isn’t just about tragedy. It’s about what happens when a man finally stops running. We talk openly about men’s mental health, suicide prevention, integrity, faith, and why so many men suffer in silence until it feels unbearable. Stanley shares the lessons grief taught him, the power of forgiveness, and how community and honesty can save lives.

If you’ve lost someone to suicide, struggled with your mental health, or wondered how to be a better man in a broken world, watch this episode to be reminded that you’re not alone and it’s never too late to choose a different path.

Key Moments:
0:00 I Buried a Friend Yesterday…
3:30 The Note His Friend Left Behind
6:25 Holding a Gun at 15 and Asking “Why”
8:55 The Session That Shut Him Down
12:18 The Lie That Killed His Hope
15:01 A Broken Father-Son Bond
17:48 Trying to Start Over… One Last Time
21:17 The Call That Changed Everything
24:22 The Details No One Warned Him About
28:24 The Suicide Statistics Men Ignore
31:02 Why His Pain Became His Purpose
35:10 The Silent Addiction Destroying Men
39:13 Why Being Approachable Can Save a Life
41:35 “Suicide Doesn’t End Pain... It Passes It On”
45:12 The One Truth Every Man Needs to Hear Today