Adult Child

✨SAFE WITHIN: A 7-week live somatic journey to get out of your head and into your body. Starts Wed. Oct 7th. Early bird pricing through 9/17 👉 adultchildpodcast.com/safewithin
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⚓JOIN THE SHITSHOW — The Adult Child Healing Community
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✨SAFE WITHIN: A 7-week live somatic journey to get out of your head and into your body. Starts Wed. Oct 7th. Early bird pricing through 9/17 👉 adultchildpodcast.com/safewithin
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All the healing work in the world won't make someone else willing to do their own.
Dr. Angelica Shiels is a clinical psychologist a licensed clinical psychologist who works with couples and families using Emotionally Focused Therapy, the creator of the app Attuned - Relationships and the host of Attuned with Dr. Angelica & Coach Amanda. In today's conversation she walks through the dynamics she sees when two people's childhood wounds meet in a relationship, and what actually has to happen for either of them to change.
✨ What this episode explores
▪️ When Only One of You Is Doing the Work — The two kinds of harm to screen for before you keep trying, and why staying in couples therapy too long with an unwilling partner damages the person who's willing.
▪️ The Parentified & Golden Child Pairing — The most common match in relationships, why it works beautifully until the parentified partner finally asks for something, and the exact moment it comes apart.
▪️ The 4 States People Can't Tolerate — Defectiveness, powerlessness, uncertainty and wrongness, which one sits underneath the other three, and what it means when you only react to one of them.
▪️ High Conflict Couples Doesn't Need Better Communication — Why teaching skills to a dysregulated couple fails, what has to be in place before any technique works, and why titration matters more than depth.
▪️ Fawning That Looks Like Willingness — How to tell the difference between a partner who is actually in it and one who is agreeing with everything while privately still judging you.

Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a great deal: https://www.omahasteaks.com
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⚓JOIN THE SHITSHOW — The Adult Child Healing Community
6 weekly Zoom support groups · Discussion boards · Peer connection
👉 theshitshow.mn.co

🗞️ SIGN UP FOR SHITSHOW NATION
Get the newsletter for community updates, healing insights & early access to workshops.
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Our Sponsors:
* Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a great deal: https://www.omahasteaks.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

✨SAFE WITHIN: A 7-week live somatic journey to get out of your head and into your body. Starts Wed. Oct 7th. Early bird pricing through 9/17 👉 adultchildpodcast.com/safewithin

⚓JOIN THE SHITSHOW — The Adult Child Healing Community
6 weekly Zoom support groups · Discussion boards · Peer connection
👉 theshitshow.mn.co

🥩 Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a $35 off: https://www.omahasteaks.com

🗞️ SIGN UP FOR SHITSHOW NATION
Get the newsletter for community updates, healing insights & early access to workshops.
➡️ Join here

💁‍♀️ SUPPORT THE POD
☕ Buy Me a Coffee – help Andrea (and her cats) eat
🛍️ Shop Shitshow Merch

💬 CONNECT WITH ANDREA
Instagram → @adultchildpod
TikTok → @adultchildpod
YouTube → @adultchildpod

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a great deal: https://www.omahasteaks.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

✨SAFE WITHIN: A 7-week live somatic journey to get out of your head and into your body. Starts Wed. Oct 7th. Early bird pricing through 9/17 👉 adultchildpodcast.com/safewithin
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Trauma-informed is a phrase any practitioner can put on their website. But some of the people using it have never sat in a client chair themselves.
Amber Trejo and Megan Walsh are licensed trauma therapists from the Midwest who are both survivors of complex trauma and on their own healing journeys. They are the co-hosts of the new podcast We Should Talk, where they get into relationships, motherhood, pop culture, and mental health without the expert hats on.This is an honest conversation about how much damage a bad practitioner can do, and what to actually ask before you hand someone your history.
✨ What this episode explores
▪️ Red Flags in a Practitioner — The specific things that should give you pause, from skewed boundaries to a therapist who has never been in therapy themselves.
▪️ Questions to Ask — What to ask in a consultation before you ever book a first session, and why the direct version of the question gets you the more useful answer.
▪️ When is Self-Disclosure Appropriate — Why a therapist sharing their own story can be the thing that lands, and the question they should be asking themselves before they open their mouth.
▪️ The Importance of Attunement — How a good practitioner tracks your breath, your face, and what you're not saying, and what it costs you when they only track your words.
▪️ When No One Talks About It —What it does to a kid when something is clearly off but your parents ignore it, and how that impacts your ability to community as an adult.
▪️ Titration in Trauma Work — Why going into your worst material every single week isn't depth, and how the touch-in-and-return rhythm keeps you from being retraumatized.

Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a great deal: https://www.omahasteaks.com
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🎧 If this episode resonated, you might also love:
▪️ Ep 208 | When Each Parent Leaves a Different Scar - From Attachment Wounds to Parenting Triggers, Rage & Repair w/ Amber Trejo
-----------------------
⚓JOIN THE SHITSHOW — The Adult Child Healing Community
6 weekly Zoom support groups · Discussion boards · Peer connection
👉 theshitshow.mn.co

🗞️ SIGN UP FOR SHITSHOW NATION
Get the newsletter for community updates, healing insights & early access to workshops.
➡️ Join here

💁‍♀️ SUPPORT THE POD
☕ Buy Me a Coffee – help Andrea (and her cats) eat
🛍️ Shop Shitshow Merch

💬 CONNECT WITH ANDREA
Instagram → @adultchildpod
TikTok → @adultchildpod
YouTube → @adultchildpod

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a great deal: https://www.omahasteaks.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

✨SAFE WITHIN: A 7-week live somatic journey to get out of your head and into your body. Starts Wed. Oct 7th. Early bird pricing through 9/17 👉 adultchildpodcast.com/safewithin
--
⚓JOIN THE SHITSHOW — The Adult Child Healing Community
6 weekly Zoom support groups · Discussion boards · Peer connection
👉 theshitshow.mn.co
Shitshow Saturday #127
🗞️ SIGN UP FOR SHITSHOW NATION
Get the newsletter for community updates, healing insights & early access to workshops.
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💁‍♀️ SUPPORT THE POD
☕ Buy Me a Coffee – help Andrea (and her cats) eat
🛍️ Shop Shitshow Merch

💬 CONNECT WITH ANDREA
Instagram → @adultchildpod
TikTok → @adultchildpod
YouTube → @adultchildpod

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Omaha Steaks and use my code BEEF for a great deal: https://www.omahasteaks.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy