Classics Read Aloud

"Leave It to Jeeves" by P. G. Wodehouse
“’Sir?’ said Jeeves, kind of manifesting himself. One of the rummy things about Jeeves is that, unless you watch like a hawk, you very seldom see him come into a room. He’s like one of those weird chappies in India who dissolve themselves into thin air and nip through space in a sort of disembodied way and assemble the parts again just where they want them.”
If you have never experienced a Bertie & Jeeves story firsthand, you are in for a treat. This is comedy, pure and simple. Pelham Grenville (P. G.) Wodehouse did not set out to make satire or social commentary, nor was he concerned with wisdom or subversion. Wodehouse was an entertainer, and he conducted himself in the elevation of this artform with such finesse that we can hardly appreciate the difficulty as we consume it. As he humbly confessed in a 1961 interview, “I haven’t got any violent feelings about anything, I just love writing.”
And, oh, to be loved by Wodehouse, what decadence is bestowed. The author churned out stories of this yin-and-yang pair over nearly 60 years, bringing together the sensibilities of both his inherited English culture and his adopted American one. Bertie, the English gentleman through whose eyes we see the world, is a sort of vapid, bumbling man-about-town. His style of speech is “a blend of [English] clichés, public schoolboys’ tags, and upper-class slang, curiously enriched by a good deal of postwar American slang.” A swell chappie with a social life that is positively brimming and a Rolodex of calls that are always answered.
Meanwhile, Jeeves, Bertie’s butler, is the very picture of refined deportment; judicious in taste, behavior, and intellect. He is a reliable foil to poor Bertie, and the pair are simply topping. While Bertie’s idiocy gives necessary credence to the ridiculous situations introduced by the cast of characters parading in and out of each episode, it is Jeeves that eventually stole the show—Wodehouse called upon him for more and more stage time as the years progressed.
Today’s reading is of “Leave It to Jeeves,” the very first fully developed Bertie & Jeeves story published. Wodehouse hits right off the bat with Jeeves advising Bertie, in his own insistent way, against the error of donning a checkered suit in the modern style (“Injudicious, sir.”). With wardrobe decided, Bertie and Jeeves are thrown into helping Bertie’s pal Corky, a destitute would-be portrait painter, convince Corky’s uncle (and importantly, his only source of income) to accept his marriage to a chorus girl, the aptly named Miss Singer. (“Muriel Singer was one of those very quiet, appealing girls who have a way of looking at you with their big eyes as if they thought you were the greatest thing on earth and wondered that you hadn’t got on to it yet yourself…. What I mean is, she made me feel alert and dashing, like a jolly old knight-errant or something of that kind. I felt that I was with her in this thing to the limit.”)
It’s jolly good fun.
Whether you’re having a bad day, are stuck in bed with the flu, or are in a literary rut, some time in Wodehouse’s world may be just the ticket. His characters are winningly simple, the stereotypes hysterically on-point, and the plotlines unapologetically frothy. It takes great talent to have created such an effect and maintained it over so many years; the result of true love, clearly.
Please enjoy…
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To Build a Fire by Jack London
“At the man’s heels trotted a dog...The animal was depressed by the tremendous cold. It knew that it was no time for travelling. Its instinct told it a truer tale than was told to the man by the man’s judgment.”
Over at Doomberg, where we write about energy as the lynchpin to humanity’s ability to not only survive but thrive (“Energy is Life”), we have often highlighted the concept of “thermal comfort”—the narrow band of temperature conditions in which human life can sustain. It is easy to take such a concept for granted in a world where even the most basic of new cars includes a heated steering wheel and a pair of heated seats. Nonetheless, while human beings are quite hearty in many respects, temperature matters, and exposure to extreme cold has been the death knell to many fingers, toes, and lives.
Enter Jack London. London is famous for his narrative work exploring the great north and was an experienced outdoorsman himself, having joined the 100,000 prospectors heading into the frigid wilderness during the Gold Rush of the late 1800s. It was here that he battled the most extreme elements that Mother Nature had to offer, hauling a year’s worth of food and equipment up the viciously steep Chilkoot Pass, into the Yukon, on his way to Dawson City. Temperatures in the region could reach as low as 70 degrees below zero Fahrenheit, and a man’s spittle would freeze midair. Only a fraction of those attempting the journey, all desperate to mine their way to fortune, survived. London’s stories strike so powerfully because he lived them.
“To Build a Fire” follows an unnamed prospector making his way on a similar path. He has separated from the rest of his group, taking a circuitous route to scope out some logging potential for the coming spring. On this simple, quick trip—“he would certainly be with the boys by six”—he is accompanied by his dog, a beast driven by the strong signals flaring in its instinctual core, unclouded by mankind’s hubris.
This is a visceral anthem to the supremacy of Mother Nature that you won’t soon forget.
Please enjoy…
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The Snow Queen by Hans Christian Andersen
With today’s reading, I’d like to focus your attention on Andersen’s dazzling imagery. This adventurous tale is a treat for our senses and creative instincts.
Andersen, naturally, opens by setting the stage with an enchanted challenge that must be overcome. One day, devilish sprites create a mirror whose every reflection is a twisted and frightful distortion. They revel in their mischievous creation, flying up into the air with delight. “The higher they flew with the mirror, the more terribly it grinned.”
The sprite’s antics end with a crash as the mirror slips from their control and is dashed into “a hundred million and more pieces” that wreak havoc far and wide.
Two splinters of mirror find their way into the heart and eye of a little boy named Kay. He and his dear friend, Gerda, live beside each other—“They were not brother and sister; but they cared for each other as if they were”—and meet often on the roof between the two garrets where “the tendrils of the peas hung down over the boxes; and the rose-trees shot up long branches, twined round the windows, and then bent toward each other; it was almost like a triumphant arch of foliage and flowers.”
With two sharp pains, the lodged shards afflict Kay. He rejects all that is good and pure, including Gerda, and is soon taken captive by the powerful Snow Queen, whose kiss “was colder than ice; it penetrated to his very heart.” In his mirror-twisted vision, it is she who becomes beautiful and clever to him.
“On they flew over woods and lakes, over seas, and many lands; and beneath them the chilling storm rushed fast, the wolves howled, the snow crackled; above them flew large screaming crows, but higher up appeared the moon, quite large and bright; and it was on it that Kay gazed during the long long winter’s night; while by day he slept at the feet of the Snow Queen.”
Little Gerda, full of innocence and determined dedication to her friend, strikes out to find him amidst the vast unknown, leaving behind everything she knows. All manner of fauna and flora awakens to her goodness—“…when her warm tears watered the ground, the tree shot up suddenly as fresh and blooming as when it had been swallowed up”—and royal chambers open to her solicitation—“The ceiling of the room resembled a large palm-tree with leaves of glass, of costly glass; and in the middle, from a thick golden stem, hung two beds, each of which resembled a lily. One was white, and in this lay the Princess; the other was red, and it was here that Gerda was to look for little Kay.”
The fearless Gerda makes her way, mile by mile, from the cherished gardens of her hometown through the frozen great North to rescue Kay, buoyed always by her earnestness and purpose—“’I can give her no more power than what she has already. Don’t you see how great it is? Don’t you see how men and animals are forced to serve her; how well she gets through the world barefooted?’”
This is just a small taste of the banquet laid on Andersen’s narrative table. Surely, Andersen’s story has influenced many a modern cinematic tale, but none capture the glory of that which exists in our mind’s eye, as guided by his words. His expressive scenes breathe life into the many dichotomies suggested in this tale that pits good against evil and logic against faith.
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Christmas on the Roof of the World by Ernest Hemingway
“Chink knocked at the door.
“‘Merry Christmas, mes enfants,’ he grinned. He wore the early morning garb of big, woolly dressing-robe and thick socks that made us all look like some monastic order.”
It is Christmas morning, and, as this reading arrives in your inbox, I will be gathered in the family room with my brood, each in our robes and thick socks, performing the time-honored ritual of gift-giving and hug-receiving. The coffee is brewed, the fireplace is roaring, and the tree is casting an other-worldly glow that will shine forever in our memories.
Should you have 11 minutes for a charming diversion today, perhaps as the egg casserole bakes or while getting spruced up for dinner, I have something well off the beaten path from a familiar name. In “Christmas on the Roof of the World,” Ernest Hemingway shares his diary of a Christmas spent skiing in the Swiss Alps. It beautifully captures the ephemeral freshness—the comfort and joy—of this special day.
Please enjoy…
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A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, 1843
In December of 1843, Charles Dickens gave fresh life and tradition to the celebration of Christmas. The first print of his cherished novel, A Christmas Carol, sold out in a mere five days, and its popularity has continued at a fevered pitch for nearly two centuries.
While there are interpretations and adaptations of his work at every turn, there is no substitute for soaking in the words of the original: the mouthwatering foodstuffs, the magical bells, the mirthful Fezziwigs, the inimitable Scrooge, and the many humble scenes awakening Scrooge’s humanity down to his very marrow.
Of all the entertainments bombarding you this holiday, there isn’t a more worthy one on offer to delight, nourish, and bind your family to the spirit of the season. To borrow a turn of the author’s, if that’s not high praise, tell me higher, and I’ll use it.
I relish in reading this story aloud, just as Dickens himself did, giving hundreds of performances across Britain and America over several decades. The whole endeavor exhausted him, but he took immense pleasure in bringing his characters to life for packed auditoriums, continually revising the text to maximum impact in such settings.
I am grateful to have had two of my loved ones joining me “on stage” to bring this cast of characters to life and can understand what must have drawn Dickens to the art of live readings…suffice it to say we are already excited to sharpen our characters for another go at it next year!
Please enjoy…
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This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit classicsreadaloud.substack.com