S3 Ep. 7 - Jared - Bed Wetters Vs Bag Snatchers
What the conversation coversJared’s “normal” Aussie upbringing, love of surfing and metal music, and early experiences with alcohol.How drinking escalated in his late teens and 20s around clubs, footy, bands, and mates, leading to blackouts, fights, guilt, relationship breakdown, and large unpaid fines.The point nine years earlier where he decided to stop drinking after another destructive binge and ongoing shame, including how publicly declaring his intent to quit and a court decision wiping $62,000 in fines became a turning point he sees as a “higher power” moment.Jared initially tried to stay sober mostly on his own, attending a few AA meetings, taking some tools, then “white‑knuckling” it for about seven years, still carrying a lot of self‑hate and ego.Returning to 12‑step meetings as a support person for his partner humbled him; finding a sponsor and doing the steps shifted him from merely not drinking to actually healing emotionally and spiritually.He describes the steps as a way of living that reduced his anger (for example, road rage), helped him forgive himself, and allowed him to genuinely like and love who he is.Jared and James talk about the stigma of addiction and how many people in recovery hide their past because they feel shame, even after getting sober.Jared founded “University of Sober Living” as a clothing brand and community to give people in recovery a visible, pride‑based identity, plus a website where people can reach out for support outside formal 12‑step rooms.Both men emphasise “recovering loudly so others don’t die in silence,” and how being open about sobriety prompts others at footy clubs, gyms, or social circles to quietly ask for help.Jared explains how alcohol contributed to the breakdown of his relationship with his children’s mother and how he prioritised drinking over family, though he avoided drinking directly in front of his kids.He and his current partner are both in recovery; she is also a carer for a severely disabled child, experienced carer burnout and rehab, and is now building services to support other special‑needs parents.Their household focus is now on service and community—supporting people with addiction and carers in distress—because recovery has given them a “second life” they want to share.Jared still plays Super Rules footy (over‑35s), noting that many teammates deal with health issues, addiction, or major life stress and often seek someone with lived experience to talk to.His week in recovery usually involves around five meetings across both AA and NA, which he compares to ongoing “spiritual fitness” and a source of connection and emotional reset.He and James stress that you can fully enjoy team sport and camaraderie while sober—celebrating with soft drinks, conversation, and community instead of relying on alcohol.Recovery and the 12-step journeyService, community, and “University of Sober Living”Family, partners, and helping othersLife in ongoing recovery
New Zealand