🎙️ Parenting Advice That Doesn't Suck with S. Bear Bergman
Today on Scratch That we chat with the tender and wise trailblazer S. Bear Bergman. We found Bear when we fell head-over-heels in love with his parenting book, Special Topics In Being a Parent. Unlike so many parenting advice we've read, Bear's approach felt adaptable and possible. It was only after we booked our interview that we realized Bear is a BFD. A founding member of the very first Gay/Straight Alliance, Bear has spent the last several decades telling stories, writing books, and inviting humans into greater justice, equity, and inclusion. He is brimming with deep insight, flexible scripts, and the most non-judgmental advice. We're excited to share our conversation with you💛Tune in to hear us talk about:🍳 The two-ingredient recipe that makes the tone of Bear's parenting book different from so many others.🔬 The part about trial and error that Bear thinks we don't talk about enough.🤝 Collaborative vs controlling parenting.🔨 The part of parenting differently than you were parented that no one talks about.🔎 A clarifying strategy for the chaotic parenting moments when so many things are going wrong.🚮 Figuring out what parenting priorities to simply let go of. Trading a family tree for a family garden.🚫 The 2 kids' shows Caitlin and Bear CANNOT abide by.Mentioned In Today's Episode:Special Topics in Being a Parent: A Queer and Tender Guide to Things I've Learned About Parenting, Mostly the Hard WaySpecial Topics in Being a Human: A Queer and Tender Guide to Things I've Learned the Hard Way about Caring For People, Including MyselfThe song Bear added to our collective Scratch That Spotify playlist – "Might as Well Dance" by Patty LarkinAs Always:Check out Caitlin and Rebekah's Book Shop! Here you can find every book mentioned in our episodes, as well as a few additional faves.Use this link to get a 25% discount on a PokPok subcription! And if you haven't listened yet, check out our interview with PokPok creators, Esther and Melissa.We would love to hear from you! 🍎 Apple🟢 SpotifyFind Rebekah on Substack & Caitlin on Instagram ✨
--------
1:00:44
--------
1:00:44
🌪️ How do we parent in public??
Do you find yourself feeling extra wobbly when you're parenting in front of other people? Do you care what strangers think when your kid is having a meltdown in the grocery store or at grandma's house? Us too, friends! US TOO. Why is it so hard to hold onto ourselves/our parenting values/the ground beneath us when we're parenting in front of other people? And how else might we think about these moments?Tune in to hear us talk about:🙄 The icky part of parents commiserating with other parents.🏆 The twisty need we have for our kids to "behave" in public to validate our parenting.🤹 The trickiness of toggling multiple roles at once.🫧 How kids disrupt, for good and for bad, our bubbles built on "adult" social rules.🚨 The unique threats for disabled parents when parenting in public.🔭 2 reframes we're practicing for fraught parenting-in-public moments.As Always:Check out Caitlin and Rebekah's Book Shop! Here you can find every book mentioned in our episodes, as well as a few additional faves.Use this link to get a 25% discount on a PokPok subcription! And if you haven't listened yet, check out our interview with PokPok creators, Esther and Melissa.We would love to hear from you! Solidarity? Advice? Laments? We're here for it💛🍎 Apple🟢 SpotifyFind Rebekah on Substack & Caitlin on Instagram ✨
--------
45:54
--------
45:54
🌪️ How do we talk with our kids about the scary stuff in the world??
How do we talk to our kids about war, death, families being separated, floods, guns, violence, any of it? Should we shield them as much and as long as possible? Should we hold their hand as we tell them what we know to be real? How do we balance protecting our kids with equipping them? These questions feel important, the stakes feel high, we're doing our best, and making it up as we go. Today we dive into it as we try to figure out how we want to navigate the conversations that scare us.Tune in to hear us talk about: The sticky conversations Caitlin loves diving into with their kid and why some topics feel so much harder.🇺🇸 How our parents' talked with us about politics in the 90s.🪦 The very different responses we had to our kids seeing dead animals and the one thread we share.📚 How Caitlin is using books and stories as invitations and bridges into hard conversations.🪧 The conversations Rebekah had with a fellow protester that illuminated how she wants to move through today's politic landscape with her son.⚙️ A potentially measured and responsible new strategy to equip our kids for the scary realities of today's world.Mentioned In Today's Episode:What Makes a Baby by Cory SilverbergAs Always:Check out Caitlin and Rebekah's Book Shop! Here you can find every book mentioned in our episodes, as well as a few additional faves.Use this link to get a 25% discount on a PokPok subcription! And if you haven't listened yet, check out our interview with PokPok creators, Esther and Melissa.We would love to hear from you! What helps you navigate conversations (with your kids or anyone else!) about the scary things happening in the world right now? And what book recommendations do you have? For any age! What are the book that are helping you understand our history and humanity?🍎 Apple🟢 SpotifyFind Rebekah on Substack & Caitlin on Instagram ✨
--------
45:23
--------
45:23
🎙️Trading the Status Quo for the Risk of a Dream with Kate Wieners
A year ago, Kate Wieners quit her corporate job to open a cozy, plant-filled bookstore, Monstera's Books. And while it sounds like the pitch for a movie we'd all love, today Kate talks with us about the real-life, fleshed-out story. What stars had to align for her to leave the "good enough" setup she already had for the risk of a dream? What has it been like to be a partner and a parent as she makes this great leap? What is it like to create a third-space community around books and storytelling right now? And does the nervous-scary of a big risky dream ever go away?Tune in to hear us talk about:☎️ The story of the old 70s phone they use in the store and all the ways it sets the tone for the shop.💫 What Kate's husband Justin said when he heard her name her bookstore dream out loud at a party.％ The strategies Kate and Justin have developed to navigate living, parenting, and working together.🔧 The big and unexpected monkey wrench in their plans and how that became the scary ideal way to actually launch their plans.🔔 The epiphany Kate had while waiting for someone else to tell her she had a brilliant plan.🌿 Why Kate thinks Monstera's Books is a worthy competitor to Amazon. Just making the next decision and getting comfortable with chaos.📚 The conversation Kate overheard in the bookstore that highlighted the unique power of third spaces (especially ones that center storytelling).💓 The tremendous value/power of little risks. (Or how something as simple as a romance bookclub could save someone's life.)✨ How paying attention to the sparkle dream in ourselves can meet a much larger need in our communities.⚡️ What Kate hopes her daughters take away from growing up in this bookstore.Mentioned In Today's Episode:Two books recommended by Monstera's Books patrons – The Covenant of Water by Abraham Verghese and A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. MaasTwo of Kate's top book recommendations – I Am, I Am, I Am: Seventeen Brushes with Death by Maggie O'Farrell and Wild Dark Shore by Charlotte McConaghyAs Always:Check out Caitlin and Rebekah's Book Shop! Here you can find every book mentioned in our episodes, as well as a few additional faves.Use this link to get a 25% discount on a PokPok subcription! And if you haven't listened yet, check out our interview with PokPok creators, Esther and Melissa.We would love to hear from you! Shout out your favorite local bookstore! Tell us about your favorite third space! Share a little or big dream that's been tugging at your chest! We're here for all of it💛🍎 Apple🟢 SpotifyFind Rebekah on Substack & Caitlin on Instagram ✨
--------
1:03:52
--------
1:03:52
🌪️ From Preschool to Higher Ed – What We've Learned About Learning
What does living alongside a toddler reveal to us about our high school and college students? How does time in the classroom inform the way we approach learning with our pre-schoolers? On today's episode, we reflect on our experiences teaching and learning and cobble together a list of guiding principles.Tune in to hear us talk about:✨ Curiosity as sacred.⏱ The cost of separating places and times of learning.🌱 Shame vs safety in a learning environment.❓ The power of asking "silly" questions and admitting you don't know.☁️ Valuing "idleness" in a world that rewards gold stars.🧶 Why it's good and important to make so many crappy things.🥁 Continually seeking out experiences where we're not very skilled.⚡️ The scrappy trickster energy required to view constraints as possibility.Mentioned In Today's Episode:"Dispatches from the Ruins" is an essay in Ross Gay's book Inciting Joy.Here's the clip of Ira Glass talking about the gap between your good taste and what you are able to make when you start out.As Always:Check out Caitlin and Rebekah's Book Shop! Here you can find every book mentioned in our episodes, as well as a few additional faves.Use this link to get a 25% discount on a PokPok subcription! And if you haven't listened yet, check out our interview with PokPok creators, Esther and Melissa.We would love to hear from you! What were your experiences in school? What worked well and what do you wish had been different? How do you think about education and learning as an adult? And does that show up in how you parent/re-parent now?🍎 Apple🟢 SpotifyFind Rebekah on Substack & Caitlin on Instagram ✨
About Scratch That: Parenting & ReParenting Off Script
Scratch That is a weekly podcast with queer illustrator Caitlin Metz and disabled storyteller Rebekah Taussig, two friends trying to figure out how to be parents and people at the same time. Caitlin and Rebekah delve into heartfelt, honest conversations with caregivers who are going off script, starting from scratch, and building alternate paths. Join our community on Patreon!
Listen to Scratch That: Parenting & ReParenting Off Script, Nothing much happens: bedtime stories to help you sleep and many other podcasts from around the world with the radio.net app
New Zealand