Scratch That: Parenting & ReParenting Off Script

Now that we're a few months into making SCRATCH THAT, we take this episode to reflect on the podcast values that are revealing themselves as the most important to us. In this episode, we pull cards from Lisa Congdon's Live Your Values deck and compare notes. What do we want to prioritize? What is the target? What do we want to guide/ground each conversation?This feels like an ongoing collaborative project, and we want you to be a part of it! Would you take a couple of minutes to fill out our Patreon poll? What SCRATCH THAT values are becoming the most important to you?? We wanna know.

We wish every single one of you could sit in the presence of Sacha Mardou. Until that day, we offer you this hearts-out, into-the-depths-of-it-together conversation. Author of the graphic memoir, Past Tense, Sacha shares her story of developing anxiety when she turned 40, going to therapy for the first time, and learning that her childhood story was still with her, waiting for her self-compassion. Rich with insight and never trite, she honors the mess, the nonlinear, the unfixable alongside the hope for meaningful change. Not only did Sacha share her own stories and wisdom, but she embodied a sharp clarity and generosity in her presence with us, showcasing, in real time, her hard earned therapy tool belt.A heads-up for caution and care – around 36 minutes into this episode, Sacha references her mother being sexually assaulted at the age of 13.Tune in to hear us talk about:📝 How to adult through therapy – e.g. How do you know how long to go? When to go back? When to switch therapists? How do you process/document what you’re learning? How do you act as a self-advocate in therapy?💓 Naming the parts of ourselves trying to hold us together with harshness and rigidity, and the importance and challenge of self-compassion.🌈 Creativity as a bridge to connecting with and understanding Self.📓 Sacha’s mini lesson on Internal Family Systems.🧑‍🧒 How therapy shapes the way Sacha shows up as a parent (and how that’s changed now that she has a teenager). 🔓 Closed family communication systems versus open family communication systems. 🔄 Legacy burdens and repeated family traumas.🔨 Grappling with the reality that we can’t fix ourselves enough to be perfect parents and learning to model owning our mistakes and repairing relationships.⏰ Having the tools but feeling like we don’t have the time, energy, or wherewithal to implement them. To learn more about Sasha Mardou, you can find her on Instagram and through her website. Also, check out her books, Past Tense and Sky and Stereo.We would love to hear from you! What has your experience been with (or without) therapy? What has been the best and hardest, most and least meaningful, frustrating, fulfilling, disappointing, healing part of it?Find us on instagram @sitting_pretty ✨ @caitlinhasfeels

Last week, Caitlin invited us to mark the turn of the year by writing letters to 2024/2025. Today, we bring you the words that came from that prompt. You will hear tears, a whole lot of heartfelt, both/and reflection, and an invitation to write your own letter/create your own artifact to mark this shift in the calendar.At the end of the episode, Rebekah shares a little bit about how deeply difficult this year has been for her niece and sister. Since recording, the GoFundMe she started for them has exceeded the initial goal! It's been stunning to see folks rally around them. Because of that support, they are heading into the new year with one piece of this impossibly hard situation made a little bit lighter. If you would like to participate in supporting this family, the GoFundMe page will be up until January 3rd. A wholehearted, full-body THANK YOU to every single person who has donated/shared/tucked this family into your heart.We would love to hear from you! What are you keeping with you from 2024? What are you letting go of in 2025?

In today's episode, we reflect on our memories/associations with New Years, and the practices that do/don't feel good around this time of year. We are moving away from new year's resolutions and toward reflective practices that allow us to bear witness to the previous year.Tune in to hear us talk about:🎊 The ways we moved through this holiday when we were young.📓 Caitlin's annual, seasonal, and monthly reflection practices (including picking a yearly word, Lisa Congdon's Live Your Values deck, and reflection guides).🕯️ Caitlin's new practices, including admin adulting days, fun seasonal bucket lists, and a new advent tradition.❌ A new kind of resolution that asks – what are you NOT prioritizing this year?🗓️ Rebekah's daily documentation practices – why she does them and how she holds them lightly.⏰ Our angst about the rapid passage of time and how we want to be present for the moments as they're passing.💌 And invitation to write a letter to 2024 or 2025 – we'll read ours next week!Mentioned in this episode:Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver BurkemanLisa Congdon's Live Your Values deckWe would love to hear from you! How to you mark the turning of another year? Do you have any documentation practices that feel good to you?Find us on instagram @sitting_pretty ✨ @caitlinhasfeels