A Millennial Mind

Is sleep training the same as leaving your baby to cry it out?

In this episode, I sit down with Andrea Grace, one of the UK's longest-standing baby and child sleep experts. She's a nurse, mental health nurse, health visitor and mum of four. I recorded this while I was pregnant, when the only advice anyone gave me was "enjoy your sleep while you can". So I brought Andrea every fear I had about sleepless nights. She showed me that babies are built to sleep, that every baby is different, and that you know your baby better than anyone.

We talk about:
• What every first-time parent should know about newborn sleep
• The fourth trimester and why some babies need to be held all the time
• Safe sleep guidelines, swaddling and co-sleeping vs bed sharing
• What sleep training really means, and why it doesn't have to mean cry it out
• Why babies wake every hour, and how to help them link their sleep cycles
• Wake windows and a bedtime routine that actually works
• The one piece of sleep advice Andrea wishes would disappear from the internet
• Postnatal mental health, and how partners and family can really help
If you've ever felt judged for how you get your baby to sleep, or worried you're doing it all wrong, this conversation is for you.
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Follow Andrea: @andreagracechildsleep https://www.instagram.com/andreagracechildsleep

Connect with Andrea Grace:
Instagram: @andreagracechildsleep
website: andreagrace.co.uk.

#BabySleep #SleepTraining #AMillennialMind

Chapters:
00:00 Intro
00:57 Welcome to Millennial Mind
01:37 Meet Andrea: sleep expert, nurse and mum of four
02:08 Why sleep matters for your mental health
03:20 Is pregnancy insomnia normal?
04:10 What every first-time parent should know about newborn sleep
06:29 Can you really nap when the baby naps?
08:33 What to do when your baby isn't sleeping
10:40 Why some babies don't sleep for longer stretches
11:09 When to worry about your baby's sleep
12:20 The fourth trimester explained
14:40 Why new mums are judged so harshly
16:56 Safe sleep guidelines and swaddling
19:25 What sleep training really means
21:03 Why babies wake every hour
24:09 Wake windows and the perfect bedtime routine
27:28 What to do when your baby cries in the cot
29:19 The Ferber method
30:18 Is it the parent's anxiety?
32:20 Follow your instinct
34:30 Is cry it out harmful? What the research says
35:16 Why parents are judged either way
36:04 Does cry it out teach independence or abandonment?
37:43 Co-sleeping vs bed sharing
41:43 Breastfeeding on demand
43:14 Do newborns need a routine?
44:22 Is co-sleeping safe? When your toddler is still in your bed
45:50 "I feel like a bad mum for wanting my bed back"
50:35 Postnatal mental health and asking for help
53:17 How partners and family can support you
54:53 Fast fire round

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Why do we spend more time planning the nursery than preparing for labour?

In this episode, I sit down with Ayurvedic doctor, naturopath and functional medicine clinician Dr VJ Murthy, who has supported thousands of women through pregnancy and birth. At seven months pregnant with my first baby, I came into this conversation wanting to know the benefits of unmedicated birth, and left realising I’d been asking the wrong question. We unpack why birth has never been safer yet feels scarier than ever, what hypnobirthing really is, why your partner should never try to “rescue” you, and why a woman who gives birth is a superstar, epidural or not.

We talk about:

Why we’re more afraid of birth than ever, and the role of social media
Why motherhood is a learned skill, not an instinct
Hypnobirthing explained, and how to feel safe and ready for labour
Simple breathing and grounding techniques to calm your nervous system
Why birth isn’t a performance, and the pressure to “bounce back”
What a birth plan really is, and why it’s overrated
How partners can support you without panicking
Epidural vs unmedicated birth: the real benefits and drawbacks
How your pelvis shape can affect birth
Ayurvedic pregnancy foods, from ghee to eating dates from 36 weeks

If you’ve ever felt scared of giving birth, or pressure to do it the “right” way, this episode is your reminder that there’s no right option, only feeling supported and empowered.

Make sure you’re subscribed and have notifications on so you never miss an episode.

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Follow Dr VJ Murthy:

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#AMillennialMind #Hypnobirthing #PregnancyJourney

Chapters
0:00 Intro
1:04 Why do we plan the nursery but not the labour?
1:59 Welcome Dr VJ Murthy
4:33 Why are we so afraid of birth?
5:30 Losing the wisdom of experienced women
7:08 Hiding a pregnancy from the algorithm
10:08 Preparing your mind vs your body for birth
12:09 What is unmedicated birth?
13:38 Hypnobirthing explained
14:48 How to feel safe and ready for birth
17:24 Building your birth support system
18:34 Why your breath matters more than the nursery
19:52 Grounding techniques to calm anxiety
21:31 The humming breath that soothes stress
24:03 Trusting “I am safe” and the diving reflex
25:52 Ayurvedic self-oil massage in pregnancy
29:23 Pregnancy hormones and letting go
30:31 Why birth isn’t a performance
32:28 Birth boundaries and visitors
33:39 What is a birth plan, really?
34:59 Partners: be present, don’t rescue
36:43 The woman whose hand he held for 8 hours
40:37 Making the epidural decision with agency
42:52 First baby nerves and the pain relief safety net
44:17 It’s not the method, it’s the support
44:48 What Ayurveda really says about birth
46:58 The benefits of vaginal birth
50:25 Epidural: benefits and drawbacks
53:27 Every woman who gives birth is a superstar
54:50 Does your pelvis shape affect birth?
59:05 Pilates, pelvic floor and breath
1:00:43 Natural ways to boost oxytocin
1:02:03 Eating dates from 36 weeks
1:03:10 The best foods for each trimester
1:07:45 Foods to avoid in pregnancy
1:10:09 Golden milk and sesame laddus
1:13:45 Quickfire round
1:15:05 You never go back to who you were
1:15:41 One message for every mother
1:17:58 Next week’s episode

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Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amillennialmind
Shivani Pau Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shivani.pau
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✨ Connect with Millennial Mind ✨

Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amillennialmind
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When was the last time someone asked who you actually are? Not your job, your title or your role, but you?

In this episode, I sit down with former Victoria’s Secret model, content creator and mum of two Vita Sidokina for a conversation she’s never had in an interview before. Vita opens up about walking away from a modeling career she thought would last forever, the postpartum depression that forced her to start from zero, and how motherhood healed her relationship with her body. We talk about the painful “in-between” stage of any life pivot, why she calls herself a selfish mum, and how the tough-love parenting she grew up with shaped her drive. This conversation is for anyone outgrowing an old version of themselves and wondering who they are underneath it.

We talk about:

- Losing your identity after a career change or motherhood
- Why the “in-between” stage of a pivot keeps you stuck
- Postpartum depression and learning to start from zero
- Healing your relationship with your body through motherhood
- Why putting yourself first makes you a better mum
- Tough-love parenting, unconditional love and high standards
- Letting go of the victim mindset
- How to find out who you really are, and why half effort never works
- Why no phase of your life is permanent
- Choosing friendships wisely in your 30s

If you’ve ever felt like you don’t recognise the person you’re becoming, or you’re grieving who you used to be, this episode is your reminder that you can always start again.

Make sure you’re subscribed and have notifications on so you never miss an episode.

Follow Vita: @VitaSidorkinachannel

#AMillennialMind #IdentityShift #MotherhoodJourney

Chapters
0:00 Intro
1:00 Who are you, really?
2:10 Welcome Vita
3:08 From Russia to Victoria’s Secret
4:50 Why she walked away from modeling
7:18 Grieving the old version of yourself
9:11 Accepting life changes without resentment
10:08 The danger of being “in-between” identities
11:02 Postpartum depression and starting from zero
12:18 Vegan chef, ice cream brand and finding her thing
13:15 Pivoting your content and your audience
16:36 Staying motivated when nobody engages
19:06 Is the algorithm the new rat race?
20:49 How motherhood healed her relationship with her body
24:49 Best shape of her life after two kids
26:43 Why she’s a “selfish” mum
29:18 When being at home isn’t enough
31:00 Kids copy what you do, not what you say
33:20 Career sacrifices and dropping the victim mindset
35:51 Raised on “Okay, what’s next?”
39:40 Unconditional love with high standards
41:16 Life is on your side
42:47 Ignoring other people’s opinions
45:55 How to find out who you really are
47:32 Why half effort never works
48:55 How to stick with something new
49:29 The biggest lesson from changing identities
50:17 No phase of your life is permanent
53:15 Choosing friendships wisely in your 30s
55:05 Outgrowing friends and being direct
58:06 The quote she lives by
58:38 Next week’s episode

🔔 Subscribe for more discussions on mental health, personal growth, and healing! / @shivanipaupodcast

✨ Connect with Millennial Mind ✨

Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amillennialmind
Shivani Pau Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shivani.pau
Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/shivanipaupodcast
Performance Planner: https://my-performance-planner.myshopify.com/

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Is the spark in your relationship supposed to fade, or is losing it a sign that something’s wrong?

In this episode, I sit down with Maria G. Sosa, a licensed couples therapist (you might know her as Holistically Grace) who has been through divorce herself. We get into why the spark fades in every long-term relationship, the small resentments that quietly pull couples apart, and what healthy love actually needs once the honeymoon stage is over.

If you’re ready to launch your business before Black Friday, go to shopify.com to start your free trial.

We talk about:

Why being a “divorced couples therapist” kept her in her marriage longer than she should have stayed.
What the spark really is, and why it has to fade.
How to tell if feeling disconnected is a hard season or a real problem.
Why there’s no “normal” amount of intimacy, only what works for you two.
The early warning signs couples miss (it’s usually what’s been left unsaid)
How to bring up hard conversations without your partner getting defensive.
Why emotional safety is the most underrated part of any relationship.
Why communication isn’t always the real problem.
What to do when you’re the only one trying to change.
How she finally knew it was time to leave.

If you’ve ever felt disconnected from someone you love and wondered whether it’s normal or the beginning of the end, this conversation will help you understand what that feeling is really telling you.

Subscribe and turn on notifications so you don’t miss the next one; it genuinely helps me bring on more incredible guests.

Follow Maria G. Sosa: [add her @holisticallygrace]

AD: This episode is supported by Let’s Save Water. Small changes, repeated by enough of us, add up. Search “Let’s Save Water” or visit letssavewater.com for simple ways to save water every day.

#AMillennialMind #RelationshipAdvice #CouplesTherapy

Chapters
00:00 Intro: can divorce teach you more about love?
02:05 Welcome, Maria G. Sosa
02:54 Who is Maria?
03:17 Being a divorced couples therapist
05:51 What is “the spark”?
07:42 Does the spark have to fade?
09:28 Is it normal to feel disconnected?
10:33 How to know if it’s a real problem
12:04 Is there a “normal” amount of intimacy?
13:43 The early signs couples miss
17:13 How to start difficult conversations
24:51 Why you should never start with “you”
28:21 It’s not conflict, it’s the lack of repair
29:06 Ad break
30:00 Why safety is the most underrated part of love
34:46 How to build emotional safety
38:05 When your partner says “you’re always complaining”
41:12 When work and ambition strain the relationship
44:03 Why couples wait 2.68 years for therapy
47:37 Why communication isn’t the real problem
52:13 The stories we tell ourselves
53:39 How resentment quietly builds
54:38 Can you break the cycle?
55:26 When only one partner wants to change
57:00 When is it worth fighting for?
59:07 Why breakups shake your identity
59:48 How Maria knew it was time to leave
1:02:02 There’s no certainty in love
1:03:53 One piece of advice if your spark is fading
1:05:27 Coming up next

🔔 Subscribe for more discussions on mental health, personal growth, and healing! / @shivanipaupodcast

✨ Connect with Millennial Mind ✨

Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amillennialmind
Shivani Pau Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shivani.pau
Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/shivanipaupodcast
Performance Planner: https://my-performance-planner.myshopify.com/

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Do you owe the internet every part of your life?

In this solo episode of A Millennial Mind, I share why I didn’t tell anyone I was pregnant until I was six months along, even though I share so much of my life online.

I recorded this at the end of my second trimester, while our plans were still changing almost every week. In it, I talk honestly about the three reasons I chose to keep this chapter private. The first was protecting myself from unsolicited advice. The second was wanting to hold on to the sacredness of such a magical time. The third is the one I’m still unsure about: energy, and nazar (the evil eye).

This isn’t me telling you what’s right or wrong. It’s simply my experience, and I hope it gives you a different perspective.

Because this goes far beyond pregnancy. Whether you’re changing jobs, starting a new relationship, moving cities or making a big decision, you don’t have to tell everyone everything until you’ve figured it out for yourself.

In this episode:

- Why I kept my pregnancy private for six months
- The growing pressure to share everything online
- Why unsolicited advice can become noise
- Listening to your own intuition during big decisions
- The sacredness of pregnancy and telling family in person
- What happens when everything becomes content
- Nazar, the evil eye and protecting your energy
- Radiators vs drainers: the people who lift you and the ones who drain you
- Being mindful of those experiencing loss and fertility struggles
- Why you don’t owe anyone your story

If you’ve ever felt like you had to explain yourself, or share something before you were ready, I hope this episode reminds you that some things are allowed to stay just yours.

AD:

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Everyday ways to save water:

Cut your shower by two minutes to save 28L
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Use eco-mode on appliances to save 10L per wash

Search "Let's Save Water" or visit letssavewater.com to see what small changes you could make, and maybe have a chat with your friends and family about this too.

#AMillennialMind #PregnancyJourney #protectyourenergy

Timestamps
00:00 Why I Kept My Pregnancy a Secret for 6 Months
00:51 Not Everything Needs to Be Shared Online
01:40 The Pressure to Share Everything to Be “Authentic”
02:17 How I Hid My Bump
03:12 The 3 Reasons I Kept It Private
04:42 Reason 1: Avoiding Unsolicited Advice
05:42 Finding Out I Was Pregnant After Dubai
06:12 How the Pregnancy Changed All Our Plans
08:21 Why I Didn’t Want Anyone Else’s Opinion
09:53 Why Too Many Opinions Become Noise
10:34 Don’t Take Advice From People Who Haven’t Done It
11:24 Learning to Trust My Own Intuition
11:52 AD
12:52 Reason 2: The Sacredness of Pregnancy
13:58 Telling Our Families in Person
14:45 When Everything Becomes Content
16:49 Why I Don’t Share Week-by-Week Pregnancy Updates
17:30 Why I’m Ready to Share It Now
18:27 Reason 3: The Evil Eye & Nazar
20:05 Radiators vs Drainers: Positive & Negative Energy
21:19 Why I’m Still Unsure About Nazar
21:58 The Reactions I Didn’t Expect
23:44 Not Everyone Reacts the Way You Expect
24:15 Being Mindful of Loss & Fertility Struggles
25:34 You Don’t Owe Anyone Your Story
26:06 Only You Know What’s Right for You

🔔 Subscribe for more discussions on mental health, personal growth, and healing! / @shivanipaupodcast

✨ Connect with Millennial Mind ✨

Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amillennialmind
Shivani Pau Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shivani.pau
Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/shivanipaupodcast
Performance Planner: https://my-performance-planner.myshopify.com/

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