The Magnetic Entrance: Why Charisma Isn’t About Being Loud
What if your charisma started before you even spoke a word? In this episode, AJ and Johnny reveal how to make a magnetic entrance—one that commands attention, sparks curiosity, and creates an instant window of opportunity. Drawing on Princeton research showing impressions form in just a tenth of a second, they unpack why body language and micro-behaviors matter more than anything you say.
You’ll learn the difference between the “nice guy entrance” that keeps you invisible and the deliberate, charismatic entrance that signals composure, awareness, and confidence. From posture and pauses to eye contact and subtle acknowledgments, AJ and Johnny show you how to turn heads the moment you walk through the door—and how to convert that attention into influence with what they call conversation radar.
What to Listen For
[00:00:00] The Princeton research that shatters the “7 second” first impression myth
[00:02:00] The “nice guy entrance” and why it keeps you invisible
[00:03:27] The charismatic entrance: posture, pause, and scanning the room
[00:04:54] How nods, winks, and subtle acknowledgments spark curiosity
[00:06:26] Why deliberate stillness and micro-pauses signal authority
[00:07:44] How rushing through a door leaks anxiety and discomfort
[00:09:01] Steve McQueen’s secret to always drawing attention on screen
[00:12:01] Client story: Derek shifts from invisible engineer to magnetic connector
[00:13:42] How to listen for identity markers and turn attention into influence
A Word From Our Sponsors
Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don’t miss out on a network of opportunities!
Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy!
Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns.
Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm.
Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm.
This year, skip breaking a sweat AND breaking the bank. Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans at mintmobile.com/charm
Stop needlessly overpaying for car insurance. Before you renew your policy, do yourself a favor—download the Jerry app or head to JERRY.com/charm
Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at www.rula.com/charm
Curious about your influence level?
Get your Influence Index Score today!
Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence.
Check in with AJ and Johnny!
AJ on LinkedIn
Johnny on LinkedIn
AJ on Instagram
Johnny on Instagram
The Art of Charm on Instagram
The Art of Charm on YouTube
The Art of Charm on TikTok
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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16:33
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16:33
Playing It Safe Holds You Back | Elizabeth Weingarten
What if the very questions keeping you up at night were the key to moving forward? In this episode, AJ and Johnny sit down with author Elizabeth Weingarten to challenge the tired advice to “embrace uncertainty” and show how reframing it as an invitation—not a problem—unlocks growth in career, relationships, and life. Drawing from her book How to Fall in Love with Questions, she shares how patience, courage, curiosity, and community help us stop chasing premature answers and instead thrive in the unknown, offering a practical framework to create meaning even when the future is unclear.
What to Listen For
[00:00:00] Why “embrace uncertainty” is tone-deaf advice
[00:02:15] Defining uncertainty: doubt that delays progress
[00:05:07] Elizabeth’s personal crossroads: marriage doubts and a failing project
[00:07:02] Rilke’s Letters to a Young Poet and the idea of “living the questions”
[00:10:22] The human craving for certainty—and how it misleads us
[00:16:02] Patience as a creative and relational superpower
[00:20:05] Why patience without courage keeps us stuck
[00:26:14] Building a “questions practice” to reframe binary thinking
[00:33:19] Barbara’s story: identity shift after paralysis as freedom, not loss
[00:40:03] Loving the questions as an act of self-compassion
[00:44:13] First step: ask if your question narrows you—or opens possibility
A Word From Our Sponsors
Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don’t miss out on a network of opportunities!
Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy!
Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns.
Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm.
Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm.
This year, skip breaking a sweat AND breaking the bank. Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans at mintmobile.com/charm
Stop needlessly overpaying for car insurance. Before you renew your policy, do yourself a favor—download the Jerry app or head to JERRY.com/charm
Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at www.rula.com/charm
Curious about your influence level?
Get your Influence Index Score today!
Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence.
Episode resources:
Elizabeth's Website
How to Fall in Love with Questions
Letters to a Young Poet
Check in with AJ and Johnny!
AJ on LinkedIn
Johnny on LinkedIn
AJ on Instagram
Johnny on Instagram
The Art of Charm on Instagram
The Art of Charm on YouTube
The Art of Charm on TikTok
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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52:11
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52:11
The Social Domino Effect [Social Intelligence Brief]
What if the biggest wins in your career, relationships, and social life didn’t require three separate strategies? In this episode, AJ and Johnny reveal the Social Domino Effect—how one small, high-leverage shift can cascade into success across every domain of your life.
They unpack why confidence, chemistry, and connection all draw from the same meta-skills, why social capital compounds like financial capital, and how to identify your first domino. With real client stories and research in psychology and network theory, this episode shows how to stop playing three different games—and start tipping one domino that knocks them all down.
What to Listen For
[00:00:00] Introducing the Social Domino Effect—one shift, multiple wins
[00:01:45] Client story: Spencer focused on dating—and unlocked career and social wins too
[00:02:16] How positive emotions broaden options and create resource-building momentum
[00:03:15] From dating coaches to life strategy: how Art of Charm expanded beyond its roots
[00:05:21] The trap of treating career, romance, and social life as separate games
[00:05:39] Meta-skills: why reading the room or telling stories spill across domains
[00:07:34] Choosing cross-domain skills like deep listening and confident initiation
[00:08:18] Why practicing in low-stakes environments tips the first domino
[00:09:47] Practicing stories across contexts to strengthen them for every audience
A Word From Our Sponsors
Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don’t miss out on a network of opportunities!
Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy!
Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns.
Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm.
Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm.
This year, skip breaking a sweat AND breaking the bank. Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans at mintmobile.com/charm
Stop needlessly overpaying for car insurance. Before you renew your policy, do yourself a favor—download the Jerry app or head to JERRY.com/charm
Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at www.rula.com/charm
Curious about your influence level?
Get your Influence Index Score today!
Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence.
Check in with AJ and Johnny!
AJ on LinkedIn
Johnny on LinkedIn
AJ on Instagram
Johnny on Instagram
The Art of Charm on Instagram
The Art of Charm on YouTube
The Art of Charm on TikTok
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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12:58
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12:58
Why Strengths Become Weaknesses | Martin Dubin
Executive coach and former CEO Martin Dubin joins AJ and Johnny to reveal the hidden blind spots that quietly sabotage leaders and high performers. From the Dunning–Kruger effect to the “fishbowl” and “cabana” phenomena, Marty shows how strengths overused become weaknesses, and why true growth requires identity shifts, not just behavior tweaks.
Packed with practical insights, he explains why emotions are data, how leaders unintentionally communicate even when silent, and why luck often comes down to context and fit. Whether you’re climbing the ladder or running the show, Marty offers a toolkit to see yourself clearly and lead more effectively.
What to Listen For
[00:00:00] Defining blind spots—and why they appear during change
[00:02:16] Why leaders at the top get less feedback and stagnate
[00:06:15] Strengths turning into liabilities when overused
[00:09:36] Identity vs. behavior: making the leap from executor to strategist
[00:12:41] Emotions as data: awareness, regulation, and reading others
[00:17:27] Stress, bottling up emotions, and worse decision-making
[00:23:16] The “TOO” test: when confidence, decisiveness, or organization go too far
[00:28:02] AJ’s technique: asking “What am I missing?” to reopen input
[00:32:06] The fishbowl and cabana effects: how leaders send unspoken signals
[00:36:22] Why copying billionaires fails—and how to adapt to your own context
[00:41:37] Acting “as if” to prepare for your next role
[00:46:42] Tools from Marty’s book Blindspotting to identify your own blind spots
A Word From Our Sponsors
Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don’t miss out on a network of opportunities!
Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy!
Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns.
Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm.
Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm.
This year, skip breaking a sweat AND breaking the bank. Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans at mintmobile.com/charm
Stop needlessly overpaying for car insurance. Before you renew your policy, do yourself a favor—download the Jerry app or head to JERRY.com/charm
Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at www.rula.com/charm
Curious about your influence level?
Get your Influence Index Score today!
Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence.
Episode resources:
Martin's Website
BlindSpotting
Check in with AJ and Johnny!
AJ on LinkedIn
Johnny on LinkedIn
AJ on Instagram
Johnny on Instagram
The Art of Charm on Instagram
The Art of Charm on YouTube
The Art of Charm on TikTok
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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57:44
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57:44
5 Levels of Listening [Social Intelligence Brief]
Ever leave a meeting thinking it went fine… but something didn’t land? In this concise training, AJ and Johnny unpack the five levels of listening and the “conversation radar” that lets you hear what others don’t say. You’ll learn how to move beyond facts and small talk into context, what’s left unsaid, and meaning—so people feel seen, trust you faster, and want to keep the conversation going.
What to Listen For
[00:00:00] Why “it went fine” isn’t enough—introducing conversation radar
[00:00:40] High-quality listening lowers defensiveness; oxytocin & trust
[00:02:27] What years of video breakdowns revealed about real listening
[00:04:21] Five levels overview and the Oscar Trimboli inspiration
[00:05:14] Level 1: Self-focused—seeking to be understood vs. to understand
[00:06:55] Level 2: Content—facts only = forgettable, low impact
[00:08:32] Level 3: Context—tone, timing, rhythm; role-play on ambivalence
[00:10:50] Level 4: What’s unsaid—notice omissions; kids vs. work example
[00:13:17] Level 5: Meaning—identity, values; reflective listening > shared experience
[00:14:37] The 4-step practice drill to use all five levels today
[00:15:35] How to train conversation radar (program mention & link)
A Word From Our Sponsors
Tired of awkward handshakes and collecting business cards without building real connections? Dive into our Free Social Capital Networking Masterclass. Learn practical strategies to make your interactions meaningful and boost your confidence in any social situation. Sign up for free at theartofcharm.com/sc and elevate your networking from awkward to awesome. Don’t miss out on a network of opportunities!
Unleash the power of covert networking to infiltrate high-value circles and build a 7-figure network in just 90 days. Ready to start? Check out our CIA-proven guide to networking like a spy!
Indulge in affordable luxury with Quince—where high-end essentials meet unbeatable prices. Upgrade your wardrobe today at quince.com/charm for free shipping and hassle-free returns.
Ready to turn your business idea into reality? Shopify makes it easy to start, scale, and succeed—whether you're launching a side hustle or building the next big brand. Sign up for your $1/month trial at shopify.com/charm.
Need to hire top talent—fast? Skip the waiting game and get more qualified applicants with Indeed. Claim your $75 Sponsored Job Credit now at Indeed.com/charm.
This year, skip breaking a sweat AND breaking the bank. Get your summer savings and shop premium wireless plans at mintmobile.com/charm
Stop needlessly overpaying for car insurance. Before you renew your policy, do yourself a favor—download the Jerry app or head to JERRY.com/charm
Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at www.rula.com/charm
Curious about your influence level?
Get your Influence Index Score today!
Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence.
Episode Resources
Oscar Trimboli | The Art of better Listening - Art of Charm Ep.#726
Check in with AJ and Johnny!
AJ on LinkedIn
Johnny on LinkedIn
AJ on Instagram
Johnny on Instagram
The Art of Charm on Instagram
The Art of Charm on YouTube
The Art of Charm on TikTok
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.
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