#98: Why do we Celebrate Risk Everywhere Except in Sex?
Send us a textIn last week’s episode, I talked about the “kink police” — the people who project their authority onto others and try to dictate how kink “should” be done. This week, I want to explore a different kind of projection: when people put their fears onto your choices.Agency in kink is usually talked about in terms of safety — boundaries, consent, protecting ourselves. And that’s vital. But agency is more than just the right to say no. It’s also the right to say yes to risks that matter to you.Here’s what I cover in this episode:Why agency isn’t just about safety, but also about the right to risk.How society celebrates risk in sports and travel, but shames it in sex.My personal story of doing a rope-in-water scene despite warnings.What I learned from Cruciator about scenes without safe words.Why safe words are tools, not substitutes for attunement and connection.I’d love for you to reflect: What does agency mean to you? Where’s your line between whats ok and not ok in kink? And do you think we sometimes rely too much on safe words?🔗 Don’t forget to take part in my listener survey (link in the show notes). Your feedback helps me keep shaping this podcast for your journey.Further Listening#94: Seduced by Fear: Cruciator on the Dark Side of Desire#91: The Single Most Important Skill in Kink (episode about attunement)#33: Tied up in a Pool - Not What I Expected!#32: Extreme Scenes - Understanding Abduction Play with CruciatorCurious about exploring kink? You don't have to do it alone. Book a 15min Connection Call with me and let's see where this journey takes you. Visit harleyrabbit.comxx Harley 🐰 Follow me: Fetlife Instagram SubscribeStar Visit my website harleyrabbit.com
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#97: Who Are the Kink Police and How Do You Avoid Them?
Send us a textEver met someone in the kink scene who acts like they invented BDSM? Yeah… those are the kink police. 🙄 In this episode, I’m breaking down elitism, rope snobbery, and why anyone telling you there’s a “right” way to do kink is full of it.We’ll talk about:Why your kinky journey is 100% your ownThe difference between confidence and egoHow to spot predators who isolate newbies (major red flag alert!)And why rolling your eyes at gatekeepers is totally validWhether you’re brand new or a seasoned kinkster, this episode is here to remind you: you are the authority on your own kink.🪢 Want to level up your rope skills? I’m hosting a Kazami-Ryu Shibari intensive in Townsville this October! Only 3 tickets left and early bird pricing ends this Sunday. Grab your spot through this link. Or find the Fetlife event here. 📝 Take my listener survey! I want to know more about you—your interests, your kink journey, and what you love about this podcast. It only takes a few minutes and helps me make even better episodes for you. Click the survey link here. Curious about exploring kink? You don't have to do it alone. Book a 15min Connection Call with me and let's see where this journey takes you. Visit harleyrabbit.comxx Harley 🐰 Follow me: Fetlife Instagram SubscribeStar Visit my website harleyrabbit.com
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#96: What Music Taught Me About Sex (Plus a Special Request!)
Send us a textThis week, I’m taking you behind the scenes of my journey — from being a guitar-obsessed, heavy metal teenager to chasing a music career, and eventually finding my way into sexology. On paper, those two worlds couldn’t be more different… but in this episode, I share why they’re deeply connected for me.I talk about the moments that made music feel like my safe place, the way eroticism reaches the same deep, hidden parts of us, and how both music and sex have taught me about connection, vulnerability, and being truly seen.It’s a personal one, and I think it might help you understand a bit more about who I am and why I do what I do.Plus, I’ve got a special request: I want to know more about YOU. We’re coming up to 100 episodes, and your feedback will help shape the next 100. It’s quick, fun, and an it would mean the world to me. 🙏Here's the survey link!Curious about exploring kink? You don't have to do it alone. Book a 15min Connection Call with me and let's see where this journey takes you. Visit harleyrabbit.comxx Harley 🐰 Follow me: Fetlife Instagram SubscribeStar Visit my website harleyrabbit.com
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#95: Floggers 101: Design, Technique, and Play with Chainwire
Send us a textEver wondered what makes a great flogger—and how to actually use one?In this episode of Turns Out I’m Into It, I’m joined by local kink maker Chainwire, the man behind Hurty World’s handcrafted floggers, to explore the artistry, technique, and sensation behind one of kink’s most versatile toys.We dive into:The craftsmanship of floggers—from leather selection to balance and weightWhat to look for when buying a floggerTechniques for play: thuddy vs stingy, warm-up vs intensity, and creating those delicious “waves” in a sceneHow to read your partner’s cues (both verbal and nonverbal)Cleaning, storage, and why you probably need more than one flogger in your kitSensory play, aftercare, and building intimacy through impactWhether you’re brand new to impact play or looking to refine your technique, this episode is packed with practical advice and hot tips to level up your flogging game.Where to find Chainwire:Hurty World (Fetlife)Hurty World at Brisbane’s Four Seasons MarketsPlay safe, have fun, and stay curious!Curious about exploring kink? You don't have to do it alone. Book a 15min Connection Call with me and let's see where this journey takes you. Visit harleyrabbit.comxx Harley 🐰 Follow me: Fetlife Instagram SubscribeStar Visit my website harleyrabbit.com
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#94: Seduced by Fear: Cruciator on the Dark Side of Desire
Send us a textWelcome to Turns Out I’m Into It. In this unforgettable episode, I’m joined by special guest Cruciator to explore one of the kink world’s most taboo topics: fear play.Cruciator has been active in the BDSM community since 1992 and is the owner of Fetlife’s Fear Play group. With decades of experience conducting high-intensity scenes—including multi-day abductions—he brings a grounded, thoughtful approach to a kink that is often misunderstood. He’s also a seasoned educator, offering in-depth online classes on the psychology, technique, and safety of fear play.We explore:Why fear can be intensely erotic—and even healingThe altered states and flow experiences fear play can evokeThe arc of a scene: from immersion to cathartic releaseThe neuroscience of subspace How to evoke realism in long-term dynamicsHow tops manage responsibility, subtle cues, and emotional safetyWhy cultural fear of dark fantasies causes more harm than the desires themselves🎓 Want to explore further? Cruciator is offering an online class on fear play in August—designed for tops, bottoms, and anyone curious to go deeper. You can find the Fetlife event here. Tickets are available through Eventbrite here. I’ll be attending too.You can also find Cruciator's Extreme Scenes Protocol here, as well as more information on his negotiation word. 📚 Book Recommendation: The Lover’s Pinch – a fascinating history of BDSM across cultures and eras.🎧 Whether you’re fear-curious or simply fascinated by the deeper psychological layers of kink, this is one of my favorite conversations on the podcast so far!Curious about exploring kink? You don't have to do it alone. Book a 15min Connection Call with me and let's see where this journey takes you. Visit harleyrabbit.comxx Harley 🐰 Follow me: Fetlife Instagram SubscribeStar Visit my website harleyrabbit.com
Turns Out I’m Into It is your backstage pass to the world of kink—where curiosity is queen, shame is stripped away, and nothing is off-limits. Hosted by somatic sexologist Harley Rabbit, this podcast delves into the psychology of desire, exploring how BDSM, power dynamics, and play can unlock self-discovery, intimacy, and even healing.From abduction fantasies to shibari, age play to non-monogamy, Harley serves up candid personal stories and juicy interviews with kink experts from around the globe. Whether you're a seasoned kinkster, a wide-eyed newbie, or just here for the naughty stories, this show will indulge your imagination, tickle your curiosity, and maybe—just maybe—have you whispering, turns out, I’m into it too!
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