Sex With Emily

Great oral sex isn’t about mastering a technique, memorizing tutorials, or finding one magic trick. It’s about being present enough to listen to your partner’s body.

In this episode, I’m sharing how to build a sexual language with your partner through attention, communication, and responsiveness. We’re talking about why starting slow matters, how to read the signals your partner is giving you, what it means to follow the “yes,” and why feedback like “don’t stop” or “softer” is an invitation—not a critique.

If you want oral sex to feel more connected, more pleasurable, and less like a performance, this episode is for you.

ABOUT EMILY:

Emily Morse is a Doctor of Human Sexuality, author and host of the #1 rated Sex with Emily podcast. Known as a renowned sexologist, Dr. Emily has helped millions of people around the world navigate their sex lives. Her candid and often funny conversations challenge cultural taboos, misinformation and awkward sex talks to create a future where people can deeply connect and embrace pleasure-filled lives. Because, life is too short for bad sex.

CONNECT:

Best Sex Ever Tour: https://sexwithemily.com/events

Shop With Emily: https://shop.sexwithemily.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexwithemily/

X: https://twitter.com/sexwithemily

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sexwithemily

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@sexwithemily

Threads: https://www.threads.net/@sexwithemily

WANT MORE?

Visit the Website: https://sexwithemily.com/ which includes FREE guides.

Free Downloadable Guides: https://sexwithemily.com/guides/

Text With Me: https://sexwithemily.com/text

Receive Sex Tips On The Regular: https://sexwithemily.com/subscribe

Interested in 1:1 Coaching with Emily? Go to http://sexwithemily.com/coaching to apply!

Try JO flavored lube to make oral sex taste as good as it feels: https://bit.ly/systemjoshopSWE

Chapters:

0:00 – Intro: what this episode covers1:24 – The oral sex skill nobody teaches: no secret move, just paying attention2:49 – Step one: start way slower than you think you need to4:29 – Why arousal needs a runway5:52 – Step two: read the body and be a detective7:35 – Step three: follow the yes9:29 – What to do when the yes goes away10:32 – Step four: talk about it11:22 – Why feedback is direction, not criticism12:36 – The question to ask: "What was your favorite part?"14:08 – The real skill: attunement and the full feedback loop
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Let's talk about why foreplay might be the most misunderstood thing in your sex life… because the way most couples think about it is exactly backwards. In this episode I'm breaking down why foreplay doesn't start in the bedroom and what to do when your partner goes straight to penetration every single time, when the sex has gone stale and neither of you knows how to say it, when one person won't reciprocate, and when a medical situation forces you to get creative in all the best ways.

If you have ever wished your partner understood what you actually need before sex even starts, this one is for you.

ABOUT EMILY:

Emily Morse is a Doctor of Human Sexuality, author and host of the #1 rated Sex with Emily podcast. Known as a renowned sexologist, Dr. Emily has helped millions of people around the world navigate their sex lives. Her candid and often funny conversations challenge cultural taboos, misinformation and awkward sex talks to create a future where people can deeply connect and embrace pleasure-filled lives. Because, life is too short for bad sex.

CONNECT:

Best Sex Ever Tour: https://sexwithemily.com/events

Shop With Emily: https://shop.sexwithemily.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexwithemily/

X: https://twitter.com/sexwithemily

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sexwithemily

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@sexwithemily

Threads: https://www.threads.net/@sexwithemily

WANT MORE?

Visit the Website: https://sexwithemily.com/ which includes FREE guides.

Free Downloadable Guides: https://sexwithemily.com/guides/

Text With Me: https://sexwithemily.com/text

Receive Sex Tips On The Regular: https://sexwithemily.com/subscribe

Interested in 1:1 Coaching with Emily? Go to http://sexwithemily.com/coaching to apply!

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction

02:15 Foreplay Starts After the Last Orgasm

04:00 Why Spontaneous vs Responsive Desire Changes Everything

06:00 The Psychology of Arousal and What Gets You There

07:30 Call 1: He Goes Straight to Penetration Every Time

10:00 How to Tell a Sensitive Partner What You Actually Need

13:00 The Compliment Sandwich and Why It Works

15:30 Call 2: Our Sex Has Gone Stale and I Don't Know How to Fix It

18:00 What to Do When Foreplay Has Disappeared From Your Relationship

21:00 Call 3: My Partner Won't Reciprocate Foreplay

24:00 How to Ask for What You Want Without Making It a Fight

27:00 Call 4: I Have Never Had an Orgasm

30:00 Why Most People Skip the Most Important Step

33:00 Your Homework: 30 Minutes Three Times a Week

35:00 Call 5: I Can't Have Sex for 6 Weeks After My Procedure

36:00 How to Stay Sexually Connected When Penetration Is Off the Table

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Sexual communication isn’t a sign that something is wrong—it’s how sex gets better. When your partner says “slow down,” “stay right there,” or asks for something different, they aren’t rejecting you. They’re giving you the roadmap to what feels good for them right now.

In this episode, I’m talking about how to create the safety to give and receive direction during sex without anyone getting defensive, embarrassed, or shutting down. We’ll explore why learning basic anatomy is only the beginning, how bodies and desires change over time, and why staying curious is the real secret to being a great lover.

If you want more connected, responsive, and satisfying sex, this episode is for you.

ABOUT EMILY:

Emily Morse is a Doctor of Human Sexuality, author and host of the #1 rated Sex with Emily podcast. Known as a renowned sexologist, Dr. Emily has helped millions of people around the world navigate their sex lives. Her candid and often funny conversations challenge cultural taboos, misinformation and awkward sex talks to create a future where people can deeply connect and embrace pleasure-filled lives. Because, life is too short for bad sex.

CONNECT WITH EMILY:

Best Sex Ever Tour: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/events⁠⁠

Shop With Emily: ⁠⁠https://shop.sexwithemily.com⁠⁠

Instagram: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sexwithemily/⁠⁠

X: ⁠⁠https://twitter.com/sexwithemily⁠⁠

Facebook: ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/sexwithemily⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@sexwithemily⁠⁠

Threads: ⁠⁠https://www.threads.net/@sexwithemily⁠⁠

WANT MORE?

Visit the Website: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/⁠⁠ which includes FREE guides.

Free Downloadable Guides: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/guides/⁠⁠

Text With Me: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/text⁠⁠

Receive Sex Tips On The Regular: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/subscribe⁠⁠

Interested in 1:1 Coaching with Emily?

Go to http://sexwithemily.com/coaching to apply!

Try the Dame Pom to explore sensation and actually get out of your head during sex: https://shop.sexwithemily.com/swe08

Chapters:

0:00 - What Nobody Taught You About Vaginas1:24 - The Vagina Is Not the Whole Thing — Here's Your Anatomy Refresher3:00 - The Sex Ed We Got Was Basically Useless (And What Was Missing)4:00 - Step 1: Learn the Map — What You're Actually Working With5:30 - Why We've Been Treating Penetration Like the Main Event (And Why That's a Problem)7:00 - What Actually Happens in Your Body When You Become Aroused8:30 - Look at Your Vulva — Yes, With a Mirror. Here's Why It Matters10:30 - We Know Our Skincare Routine Better Than Our Own Pleasure Anatomy12:00 - Step 2: Stop Assuming — There Are No Universal Settings13:30 - The "Starting Gun" Problem: Why Timing Is Everything15:00 - Closing the Tabs: How to Actually Get Fully Present During Sex16:30 - When Your Body Is Telling You Something Needs Attention — Don't Ignore It17:30 - Step 3: Keep Talking — Stop Saving the Conversation for When It Goes Wrong18:30 - The GPS Analogy for Sexual Communication19:45 - What Great Lovers Actually Have in Common
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Let's talk about what actually gets in the way of connected, present, pleasurable sex… because it is almost never what you think it is. In this episode I'm taking live listener calls from people who are done settling for sex that feels disconnected, performative, or just plain stuck. A divorced mom of two who spends every sexual encounter watching herself from the outside instead of actually feeling anything. Someone navigating intimacy after leaving a religion that made sex feel like something to be ashamed of. A 19 year old who wants to take control in the bedroom but freezes every time. And more. If you have ever felt like you were in the room but not really there, this episode is going to give you a way back in.

ABOUT EMILY:Emily Morse is a Doctor of Human Sexuality, author and host of the #1 rated Sex with Emily podcast. Known as a renowned sexologist, Dr. Emily has helped millions of people around the world navigate their sex lives. Her candid and often funny conversations challenge cultural taboos, misinformation and awkward sex talks to create a future where people can deeply connect and embrace pleasure-filled lives. Because, life is too short for bad sex.

CONNECT:

Best Sex Ever Tour: https://sexwithemily.com/events

Shop With Emily: https://shop.sexwithemily.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexwithemily/

X: https://twitter.com/sexwithemily

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sexwithemily

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@sexwithemily

Threads: https://www.threads.net/@sexwithemily

WANT MORE?

Visit the Website: https://sexwithemily.com/ which includes FREE guides.

Free Downloadable Guides: https://sexwithemily.com/guides/

Text With Me: https://sexwithemily.com/text

Receive Sex Tips On The Regular: https://sexwithemily.com/subscribe

Interested in 1:1 Coaching with Emily? Go to http://sexwithemily.com/coaching to apply!

Chapters:

0:00 – Cold open: why we don't talk about sex like we talk about everything else2:21 – Caller #1: breaking free from "spectatorship" during sex8:33 – Caller #2: what to do when your partner won't go down on you12:33 – Caller #3: postpartum libido and not enjoying receiving oral17:07 – Caller #4: performance anxiety and disconnecting during sex22:17 – Why focusing on your partner's pleasure can ease performance anxiety25:22 – The trap of people-pleasing in relationships27:07 – Caller #5: how to finally make the first move29:11 – Caller #6: freezing up during a casual hookup33:52 – Healing sexual shame with EMDR therapy37:53 – Caller #7: learning to take control in the bedroom

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Great sex isn’t about finding one perfect moment and trying to recreate it forever. It’s about getting curious about what made that moment feel so good in the first place.

In this episode, I’m sharing how to talk with your partner about your best sexual memories without turning it into a complaint meeting. We’re exploring the questions that uncover what really turns each of you on: Was it the flirting all day? Feeling unrushed? The freedom, the anticipation, the way you looked at each other? Those details are the roadmap to creating more desire and connection now.

If your sex life feels fine but you want it to feel more alive, connected, and uniquely yours, this episode is for you.

ABOUT EMILY:

Emily Morse is a Doctor of Human Sexuality, author and host of the #1 rated Sex with Emily podcast. Known as a renowned sexologist, Dr. Emily has helped millions of people around the world navigate their sex lives. Her candid and often funny conversations challenge cultural taboos, misinformation and awkward sex talks to create a future where people can deeply connect and embrace pleasure-filled lives. Because, life is too short for bad sex.`

CONNECT WITH EMILY:

Best Sex Ever Tour: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/events⁠⁠

Shop With Emily: ⁠⁠https://shop.sexwithemily.com⁠⁠

Instagram: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sexwithemily/⁠⁠

X: ⁠⁠https://twitter.com/sexwithemily⁠⁠

Facebook: ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/sexwithemily⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@sexwithemily⁠⁠

Threads: ⁠⁠https://www.threads.net/@sexwithemily⁠⁠

WANT MORE?

Visit the Website: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/⁠⁠ which includes FREE guides.

Free Downloadable Guides: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/guides/⁠⁠

Text With Me: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/text⁠⁠

Receive Sex Tips On The Regular: ⁠⁠https://sexwithemily.com/subscribe⁠⁠

Try the toy I talk about in the video here: ⁠⁠https://shop.sexwithemily.com/swe07⁠

Chapters:00:00 Cold Open / Welcome to Sex with Emily01:24 Is This It? The Problem With "Fine" Sex02:33 Step 1: Notice What's Actually Happening06:20 Step 2: Name What You Actually Want09:47 Using Toys as Shared Discovery10:48 Step 3: Share It (Timing Matters)11:50 The Postpartum Story: Same Moment, Different Experience14:04 Turn the Complaint Into a Request16:19 Step 4: Experiment Without the Overhaul19:53 The Reset Recap & This Week's Exercise21:47 Closing Thought: Someone Worth Discovering
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