The Most Common Fantasy in America (You'd Be Surprised)
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In this Sex with Emily Q&A episode, Dr. Emily and producer Erica tackle listener questions about fantasies, relationships, and navigating sexual compatibility.
They explore cuckolding—one of America's most common fantasies—discussing why partners want to watch their significant other with someone else, the importance of comprehensive pre-negotiation, and why "one and done" promises rarely hold true. A listener living with his ex-boyfriend learns why moving on sexually is so difficult when you're still sharing space, and gets permission to stop pressuring himself during the healing process.
The conversation addresses adult baby/diaper fetishes, distinguishing between core erotic desires that are requirements versus nice-to-have fantasies, and explores creative solutions like working with specialized sex workers when partners aren't compatible. Finally, they dissect a toxic relationship pattern where one partner constantly shifts between attraction and rejection, helping a listener recognize when it's time to walk away.
Throughout, Dr. Emily emphasizes that early relationship sex fueled by new relationship energy doesn't last forever, the importance of understanding your own pleasure rather than just servicing a partner's wants, and why we need to stop dating people based on their potential to change.
Timestamps:
0:00 - Intro
1:25 - My Boyfriend Wants to Watch Me Have Sex with Another Man
6:02 - Why Cuckolding is One of America's Most Common Fantasies
8:55 - How Do I Move On When I'm Still Living with My Ex?
14:59 - My Wife Thinks My Fetish is Demonic - Is This Marriage Over?
20:53 - He Says I'm Not Attractive Enough Anymore - What Do I Do?
23:29 - Red Flags: When Your Partner Wants You to Change Your Body
26:10 - Closing Thoughts: Stop Fighting for Approval, Start Honoring Your Needs
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29:15
Why You're Addicted to Drama (And How It's Hurting You)
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https://www.bboutique.co/vibe/emilymorse-podcast
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In this Sex with Emily episode, Dr. Emily's first guest in the new studio is psychologist Dr. Scott Lyons, author of Addicted to Drama: Healing Dependency on Crisis and Chaos in Yourself and Others.
Dr. Lyons reveals how drama addiction isn't just obvious chaos—it's overscheduling, inability to tolerate stillness, and sabotaging intimacy when vulnerability feels threatening. He explains the biology: drama provides energy, numbs pain, and creates sensation that makes us feel alive.
Listener questions address a 21-year-old spiraling after her boyfriend called an actress sexy, and a 30-year-old wanting kinkier sex but getting triggered.
Dr. Lyons and Dr. Emily emphasize distinguishing sensation-seeking from authentic connection, coming back to the body when triggered, and recognizing how childhood patterns shape adult sexuality and relationships.
Timestamps:
0:00 - Intro
3:32 - The Hidden Signs of Drama Addiction You Might Be Missing
9:24 - How Trauma Lives in Your Body and Shapes Your Behavior
13:36 - Why Drama Shows Up in Your Relationships and Sex Life
15:37 - Why Do I Feel Terrible When My Partner Comments on Other People?
27:35 - The Currency of Love: How Childhood Chaos Affects Adult Relationships
33:48 - I Want Freaky Sex But My Body Keeps Freezing Up
42:52 - Understanding Dissociation and Finding Your Way Back Home
50:00 - How Drama Addiction Blocks True Sexual Pleasure and Intimacy
52:32 - Five Quickie Questions with Dr. Scott Lyons
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57:39
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57:39
Locktober: How to Do Chastity Play Safely
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In this Sex with Emily episode, Dr. Emily and producer Erica answer listener questions covering intimate challenges from anal play to mismatched libidos.
The episode addresses a woman whose boyfriend wants to try receiving anal rimming but can't relax into it, examining masculinity myths around pleasure. They cover penis cage safety during chastity play and what to watch for during extended use. Listeners also hear from a woman whose partner never initiates sex despite therapy, someone experiencing numbness during oral sex, and a recently divorced woman struggling to reclaim her sex drive.
Throughout, Emily emphasizes communication outside the bedroom, understanding our bodies' responses, and reclaiming sexuality as something we own for ourselves—not something tied exclusively to our partners.
Timestamps:
0:00 - Introduction
1:15 - Helping Your Partner Feel Comfortable with Anal Play
6:38 - Penis Cage Safety & Chastity Play Guidelines
13:49 - When Your Partner Never Initiates Sex
18:45 - Numbness & Tingling During Oral Sex Explained
23:07 - Reclaiming Your Sex Drive After Divorce
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30:23
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How Porn Can Actually Improve Your Sex Life
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https://www.bboutique.co/vibe/emilymorse-podcast
Join the SmartSX Membership : https://sexwithemily.com/smartsx
Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, community building, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse.
List & Other Sex With Emily Guides: https://sexwithemily.com/guides/
Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides.
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In this Sex with Emily episode, Dr. Emily teams up with anthropologist Dr. Wednesday Martin to tackle pornography—one of modern sexuality's most polarizing topics. From addressing listener concerns about partners who need porn to climax, to exploring how porn shapes our sexual behaviors and expectations.
The episode examines real listener scenarios including a woman feeling inadequate because her boyfriend requires porn and dirty talk about other women to orgasm, and another struggling with her partner's search history filled with degrading terms. Emily and Wednesday also dive into the research on porn's actual impact on sexual aggression, the rise of choking and other behaviors in mainstream sexual culture, and the difference between ethical porn and typical productions.
Throughout the discussion, they emphasize that porn itself isn't the problem—it's often a communication issue. The episode explores how couples can use porn as a tool for sexual exploration and self-knowledge rather than a source of shame or conflict, while acknowledging the legitimate concerns about how mainstream porn represents sexuality and consent.
Timestamps:
0:00 - Introduction
4:27 - Historical Context: Porn Has Always Existed
8:23 - First Porn Experiences
17:20 - Research Findings: Porn's Actual Impact on Behavior
27:47 - Case Study: When Porn Becomes a Relationship Issue
37:32 - Ethical Porn vs. Mainstream
41:56 - Using Porn as a Learning Tool for Self-Discovery
50:42 - Communication Strategies: Talking About Porn Preferences
57:17 - Final Thoughts
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1:02:15
When Your Friend Ruins Your Relationship By Sharing Your Past
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https://www.bboutique.co/vibe/emilymorse-podcast
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7 Signs of Sexual Compatibility: https://sexwithemily.com/7-signs-of-sexual-compatibility-2/
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Episode Description:
In this Sex with Emily episode, Dr. Emily and producer Eric tackle listener-submitted "Am I The Asshole" scenarios focused on sex, dating, and relationships. From a wife refusing threesomes her husband demands to fix their struggling marriage, to a boyfriend dismissing his girlfriend's painful sex as exaggerated.
The episode examines a daughter's shock at discovering her mother's 24/7 BDSM collar and addresses sexual compatibility deal-breakers, including a five-month relationship ending over asexuality versus mismatched libidos. They also tackle friendship boundaries when a well-meaning friend reveals intimate details about someone's sexual past to their new partner.
Throughout these scenarios, Emily emphasizes that most relationship conflicts stem from lack of sexual education and communication skills rather than malicious intent. The episode reinforces the importance of honest self-reflection, clear boundaries, and recognizing when patterns aren't serving your relationships.
Timestamps:
0:00 - Introduction
1:21 - Threesome Pressure in Struggling Marriage
4:45 - Why Threesomes Don't Fix Relationships
8:03 - Dismissing Partner's Sexual Pain During Sex
11:04 - Understanding Vaginismus and Vaginal Pain
14:09 - Anal Sex Pressure Despite Clear Boundaries
17:15 - The Importance of Consensual Partners for Anal
18:46 - Discovering Mom's BDSM Collar Bombshell
22:00 - How to Have Healthy Sex Conversations with Kids
24:46 - Breaking Up Over Sexual Incompatibility
28:18 - Sexual Compatibility by 5 Months Rule
30:33 - Oversharing Friend's Threesome History
33:14 - Never Share Others' Sexual Stories
Dr. Emily Morse shares her expertise on sex, relationships and everything in between! Submit your questions to Emily at sexwithemily.com/ask-emily. For more sexy fun, visit sexwithemily.com and our online store shop.sexwithemily.com. Join SmartSX, her exclusive membership community, for expert-led workshops, intimate discussions, and everything you need to elevate your pleasure! Order her book today: SMART SEX: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure.
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