Securely Attached

Dr. Tracy Dennis-Tiwary, clinical psychologist, researcher, and author of Future Tense: Why Anxiety Is Good for You (Even Though It Feels Bad), joins me to talk about why anxiety is one of the most misunderstood emotions in parenting.
 
Together we explore:
 
The surprising difference between anxiety that helps us grow and anxiety that gets in the way.
Why anxiety may be helping your child (and you!) more than you realize.
How to tell when anxiety is healthy and when it's becoming a problem.
Why some of the most common responses to childhood anxiety can backfire.
The surprising connection between anxiety, hope, and resilience.
How parents can become a source of calm without dismissing or fixing their child's feelings.
The simple shift that can help you stop seeing anxiety as the enemy.
Dr. Dennis-Tiwary's three-step framework for responding to anxiety in yourself and your child.
 
This conversation offers a powerful reframe for parents who want to support their children through anxiety without reinforcing fear or avoidance. It is about learning to see anxiety not as an enemy, but as a normal part of being human, and helping our children develop the confidence to face uncertainty, navigate discomfort, and trust their ability to handle life's challenges.
 
 
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗https://www.tracydennistiwary.com/ 
📚Future Tense: Why Anxiety Is Good for You (Even Though It Feels Bad) – A Psychologist's Paradigm Shift for Understanding and Hope
📱@dr.tracyphd
 
 
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
🔗 Dr. Sarah Bren 
🔗 Check out my group practice, Upshur Bren Psychology Group, offering therapy and coaching for individuals, children, parents, and families 
📱IG: @drsarahbren
 
 
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
 
👉 Looking for support for a child struggling with anxiety or OCD? If your child is struggling with anxiety or OCD, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers SPACE-based parent support through both a virtual group and individualized care. Go to upshurbren.com/space to learn more or book a free 30-minute consultation with our care team, who will listen carefully and help you determine the best support for your family.
 
🎧 The mattering gap: Why so many parents feel invisible, overwhelmed, and disconnected with Jennifer Wallace 
 
 
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) with Dr. Eli Lebowitz of the Yale Child Study Center
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to find the line between supporting your child and feeding their anxiety
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how parents can know when their child's anxiety may require a mental health intervention

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
 
Why it is completely normal for young children to explore their bodies and engage in self-soothing behaviors.
How parents can respond to self-touching in a calm, shame-free, developmentally appropriate way.
The difference between setting healthy boundaries and unintentionally communicating shame around bodies or pleasure.
Why some children may use self-touching as a form of sensory input, comfort, or emotional regulation, especially at bedtime.
How to teach children about privacy and body boundaries using neutral, age-appropriate language.
What to do when self-touching is happening in a shared bedroom or around siblings.
Ways to help children expand their self-soothing toolbox with other calming sensory and bedtime supports.
Why parents' own discomfort or cultural messaging around sexuality can sometimes shape how these moments feel.
How to navigate sibling questions or reactions without making the behavior feel scary or secretive.
The importance of helping children feel safe, accepted, and connected to their bodies while still maintaining appropriate boundaries.
 
This episode will help you feel more confident responding to common childhood self-soothing and body exploration behaviors with calm, clarity, and compassion.
 
 
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
 
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
 
 
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your son always has his hands down his pants
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with how developmentally appropriate expectations, boundaries, body autonomy, and consent with sex therapist Dr. Holly Richmond
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to get your 3-year-old to do things they don't want to do
 
 
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
 
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Collaborative divorce attorney and positive psychology practitioner Andrea Vacca joins me to talk about something many families don't realize is possible: a way to move through divorce without escalating conflict or damaging long-term relationships.
 
For many people, divorce is synonymous with battle. It's something to survive, something to win, or something to endure at all costs. But as Andrea explains, that model often makes an already painful experience even harder for both parents and children.
 
In this conversation, we explore how a more intentional, team-based approach can help families navigate divorce in a way that supports emotional well-being, preserves dignity, and sets the foundation for healthier co-parenting moving forward.
 
Together, we discuss:
 
What collaborative divorce is and how it differs from traditional litigation.
Why you don't need strong communication skills to start this process, just a willingness to try.
How a team-based approach (including mental health and financial professionals) supports the whole family.
The biggest myths about collaborative divorce, especially for high-conflict couples.
How positive psychology can help shift your mindset from survival to growth during divorce.
The concept of a "good enough" agreement and how it can reduce unnecessary conflict.
How emotional regulation impacts decision-making during divorce.
What it actually looks like to create a thoughtful, durable co-parenting plan.
How to revisit and improve parenting plans, even after a divorce is finalized.
How parents can protect their child's sense of stability during a major family transition.
 
This conversation is about more than divorce. It's about how we navigate major life transitions, how we stay grounded in our values under stress, and how we make decisions that support not just short-term relief, but long-term well-being for ourselves and our children.
 
 
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Vacca Family Law Firm 
🎧 A Better Divorce Podcast
📱@vaccafamilylawgroup 
 
 
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
🔗 https://drsarahbren.com/ 
📱 @drsarahbren
 
 
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
 
👉 Navigating separation or divorce? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized support at every stage of the process, including therapy and coaching, parenting and co-parenting support, family therapy, and weekly divorce groups for women and children. Whether you're in the middle of a split or adjusting to a new family structure, our team is here to help you and your children feel steady and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the right support for your family.
 
https://www.collaborativepractice.com/ 
 
 
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about divorcing with less conflict with Katherine Miller
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about busting divorce myths and breaking down the true effect it has on children Michelle Dempsey-Multack
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the legal considerations parents need to know with matrimonial attorney Lisa Zeiderman
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating high-conflict divorce while prioritizing your own needs and attachment relationships with Karen McMahon
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether "nesting" during a divorce is better for your kids

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
 
How to support a sensitive, gentle child in becoming more confident using his voice with peers.
The difference between helping your child build self-advocacy skills and trying to change their temperament.
How to teach kids simple, effective boundary-setting tools that actually work in fast-paced peer interactions.
Why "old soul" kids may naturally learn polite, sophisticated communication, but still need help practicing more direct forms of assertiveness.
Playful ways to practice boundary-setting and self-advocacy skills at home through games and role play.
How to know when to step in as a parent and when to allow kids space to navigate social challenges on their own.
Why it's important to match a child's communication tools to the intensity and energy of the situation they're in.
The importance of checking whether a child is actually distressed before assuming a social interaction is a major problem.
 
This episode will help you feel more confident supporting your child's self-advocacy skills while still honoring their unique temperament, sensitivity, and personality.
 
 
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
 
 
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can encourage your shy child without making them feel like being shy is bad?
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about temperament, personality, and parenting with Dr. Koraly Pérez-Edgar
 
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can parent your child to not be a people pleaser
 
 
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
 
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

In this deep dive episode, I explore how secure attachment evolves across development and what children are really needing from us emotionally at each stage of childhood and adolescence. Using Erik Erikson's stages of psychosocial development as a framework, we look at the core emotional tasks kids are navigating from infancy through young adulthood, and how our role as parents shifts alongside them.
 
Together, we explore:
 
What secure attachment looks like at different developmental stages.
How to stay connected to your child as their needs evolve over time.
Why toddlers push for independence and what they need from us in those moments.
How play, boredom, and curiosity support emotional development in early childhood
Why school-age kids become more focused on achievement, perfectionism, and peer comparison.
How social media can intensify insecurity during key developmental windows.
Why adolescence can suddenly feel so emotionally intense and unpredictable.
How to stay a secure base for your teen without escalating power struggles.
What today's loneliness epidemic can teach us about raising emotionally connected kids.
Why repair matters more than perfection in secure relationships.
How understanding your child's developmental task can completely shift the way you respond to behavior.
 
This episode is ultimately about learning to zoom out. Not to parent each stage perfectly, but to better understand what your child is actually working through underneath the behaviors, emotions, and developmental shifts that can sometimes leave us feeling confused or disconnected. Because when we understand the developmental needs driving our child's behavior, we can respond with more clarity, compassion, and connection.
 
 
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
🔗 Dr. Sarah Bren 
🔗 Check out my group practice, Upshur Bren Psychology Group, offering therapy and coaching for individuals, children, parents, and families 
📱IG: @drsarahbren
 
 
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
 
🎧 02. Attachment Theory and Fostering Secure Attachment Relationships
 
🎧 102. Breaking the cycle of insecure attachment: How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with it, with Dr. Miriam Steele
 
🎧 103. Secure attachment vs. social media: Navigating their effects on body image from early childhood to teen years with Dr. Miriam Steele
 
🎧 76. Secure attachment is optimal, but insecure attachment may not be as bad as we think: A conversation with attachment researcher Dr. Or Dagan
 
🎧 139. BTS: Can my kid be securely attached to me if I'm insecurely attached in my adult relationships?