The Laura Dowling Experience

Pamela Deasy was in her early 40s, working full time and volunteering with the RNLI, when fatigue started dragging her back into bed in the middle of the day. Her bloods were clear. She was told it was perimenopause, then depression. Months passed before a kinesiologist, of all people, pointed at her pancreas — and within days she was in a Cork hospital being told she had a tumour.

In this episode, Pamela sits down with Laura to walk through what happened next: the chemotherapy that made her legs turn to jelly, the five and a half weeks of daily radiotherapy that put her on her back in hospital, and the Whipple surgery that took out the head of her pancreas, part of her stomach, part of her intestine, her gallbladder and her spleen. Then the slower, quieter battle that came after — the seven and a half stone she lost, the survivor guilt nobody warned her about, the Survive and Thrive programme that helped her step back into the world, and the small camping toilet she now keeps in her car because that is the honest reality of life after Whipple surgery.

Pamela also shares why she co-founded Pancreatic Cancer Ireland, what the signs of pancreatic cancer actually look like, and why "listen to your gut and keep going back" might be the most important sentence you hear this week.

🔑 Key Points

Why fatigue was Pamela's only consistent symptom — and how easy it was to put down to a busy life, perimenopause and then depression
The signs of pancreatic cancer worth knowing: persistent tiredness, pain in the tummy that radiates to the back, floaty stools, dark urine, jaundice, an itch with no rash, new pre-diabetes
What Whipple surgery actually involves, and why it is described as life-saving but life-altering
The realities of life after a rewired digestive system, from packing a change of clothes to always knowing where the toilet is
The chemotherapy side effects that have lingered for years — neuropathy, Raynaud's, cold intolerance
Survivor guilt, the drop-off in support after the "all clear", and finding her way back through the Survive and Thrive programme
Why pancreatic cancer is projected to be the second leading cause of cancer-related death by 2030
Pamela's everyday philosophy: advocate for yourself, listen to your gut, and treasure the ordinary days

📚 Resources

Pancreatic Cancer Ireland
Survive and Thrive

⏱️ Timestamps

00:00 — Welcome
00:27 — Blackrock Health Women's Health Centre
01:34 — Introducing Pamela and trusting your gut
02:13 — 2018: fatigue, busy work and the RNLI
03:04 — Going back to the GP again and again
05:01 — A kidney scan and "the good news is there's no cancer"
06:00 — Being told she might be depressed
06:16 — A kinesiologist who pointed at her pancreas
07:17 — Jaundice and the alarm bell
08:51 — Friday 7th December: into hospital in Cork
09:22 — "You have a tumour in your pancreas"
12:02 — What Whipple surgery actually is
13:00 — Six rounds of chemotherapy
13:30 — Side effects: falling, neuropathy, Raynaud's
17:48 — Radiotherapy, gemcitabine and six weeks in hospital
21:51 — Whipple surgery on 15 August 2019
23:20 — What was removed during Whipple
24:17 — Losing seven and a half stone and severe cachexia
26:14 — Ascites and the slow road back
29:48 — From patient to survivor
30:23 — Survivor guilt and finding therapy
31:11 — The Survive and Thrive programme
31:38 — Life after a rewired digestive system
34:55 — Pancreatic cancer statistics in Ireland
36:00 — The signs and symptoms worth knowing
42:00 — Setting up Pancreatic Cancer Ireland
47:58 — Where to find Pamela
49:25 — Advice for younger people, and the meaning of life
51:38 — Blackrock Health Women's Health Centre
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
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In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, endocrinologist Dr Mary Ryan opens up about losing her husband unexpectedly while raising three small children, and what grief actually looked like for her in the years that followed.

She tells Laura about the shock, the anger, and the long fog of those first two years — and the small, practical things that helped: leaning into bonding routines with her kids, accepting help from family, friends and even her own patients, and letting people in when every part of her wanted to push them away.

🔑 Key Points
Why grief, in her experience, takes around two years — and why the second Christmas is often the hardest
The "dark hole" she fell into, and what slowly pulled her out
How she kept life moving day-to-day for three young children
The quiet role of family, friends and patients in keeping her going
A gentle, honest take on how you don't really "get over" loss — you come through it

🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Anxiety author Caroline Foran joins Laura for a deeply personal conversation about parenting a young son recently diagnosed as autistic with a PDA profile, alongside her own long history with anxiety.

Caroline talks openly about the years before the diagnosis, the blame she turned inward, and everything she has had to unlearn about parenting. She explains what PDA — Pervasive Drive for Autonomy — actually looks like day to day, why traditional approaches can make things worse, and the social pressure of being seen to "manage" a child whose nervous system is set on high alert.

She also shares her own anxiety story, from a frightening breakdown at sixteen in Italy through to the severe physical anxiety that took over her twenties. Caroline talks about medication, CBT, and the years of work behind her new book Everything I Wish I'd Known About Anxiety, and why so much of recovery came from showing her body safety rather than trying to outthink her own mind.

🔑 Key Points

Discovering a PDA profile — Caroline explains Pervasive Drive for Autonomy and what it means for her son's nervous system day to day.
Why traditional parenting backfires — Holding firm boundaries can push a PDA child straight into fight or flight, even at five.
Lowering the demands — A low-demand, declarative-language approach has reshaped everyday life at home.
Performative parenting — The urge to respond to her son for the benefit of onlookers, even with close friends.
The years before the diagnosis — A bumpy COVID start, severe separation anxiety and two preschool attempts that left him distressed.
Caroline's anxiety story — A breakdown at sixteen in Italy and a severe physical episode at twenty-five.
Medication, CBT and self-compassion — Prozac, behavioural therapy and learning to respond to anxiety with kindness rather than self-attack.
Showing the body safety — Why walking, rhythm and bottom-up regulation worked better than trying to master her thoughts.
The cost of constant stimulation — Social media, the pleasure–pain balance and collective anxiety since COVID.

📚 Resources

Everything I Wish I'd Known About Anxiety
Owning It
PDA Society
Casey Ehrlich (Peace Parents)
Dr Anna Lembke — Dopamine Nation

⏱️ Timestamps

02:00 — "Is he non-verbal?" introducing her son
02:30 — Autism with a PDA profile
03:00 — What PDA stands for
04:30 — Nervous system disability and perceived demand
06:00 — Why traditional parenting can backfire
08:00 — Performative parenting in public
10:00 — A pillow on the grass and what dysregulation looks like
13:00 — Blaming herself before the diagnosis
17:00 — Sensory overwhelm and rethinking exposure
20:00 — Preschool, school and what comes next
30:00 — Family life, marriage and never a date night
33:30 — Caroline's anxiety story begins in Italy
39:00 — A severe breakdown at twenty-five
45:00 — Starting medication and what Prozac actually did
51:00 — CBT, behavioural experiments and getting her life back
56:00 — Showing the body safety
59:00 — Social media and the pleasure–pain balance
01:04:00 — Caroline's new book
01:05:30 — Advice and the meaning of life
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this bitesize moment pulled from the Laura Dowling Experience back catalogue, comedian Kyla Cobbler shares an honest, no-frills account of how her drinking quietly turned into dependency — while she was still training, working, and gigging five nights a week.

She tells Laura how being a regular performer in Barcelona blurred the lines between socialising and self-medicating, and how Dry January cracked the whole thing open. What started as a simple challenge ended in withdrawal, therapy, AA, and a completely new relationship with fear, nerves, and joy on stage.

🔑 Key Points
How "high-functioning" drinking can hide a much bigger problem
The cycle of running, gigging, free drinks — and waking up groggy every single morning
What withdrawal actually felt like by day two of Dry January
Why it was never about the red wine — it was about wanting to feel different
Performing sober for the first time, and learning to feel everything instead of numbing it

🎧 Listen to the full episode here.
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Barbara Scully sits down with Laura for a wide-ranging conversation that starts with her own recent run-in with the medical system and opens out into what it actually means to age as a woman in Ireland today.

Barbara talks about months of hip pain, a string of MRIs, a suspected stroke that turned out to be nothing, and the moment she decided to step off the treadmill of tests, hand back the prescription and rebuild her strength in the gym. She also shares her type 2 diabetes diagnosis in her mid-50s and the two years of remission she achieved through diet and exercise before her mother died and life became harder again.

The conversation moves into menopause, brain fog, mood swings and the language used about older women. Barbara reframes brain fog as an information retrieval slowdown, makes the case that women's anger after menopause is real and warranted, and argues that being underestimated as you get older is closer to a superpower than to invisibility.

There is also room for the story behind it all. Growing up tall in a male-dominated house. Becoming an unmarried mother in 1987 and listening to politicians and clergy describe women like her as a scourge on the radio. The close, unconventional friendship she had with her mother, who set up her own business teaching women word processing in the late 1980s. And the comedy career she fell into in her 60s, now touring with her one-woman show Older Bolder Wiser. Her best-selling book ‘Wise Up’ is available now in Irish bookstores nationwide & on Amazon.ie 📚

🔑 Key Points

Trusting your gut with healthcare
After months of MRIs and a hip replacement referral, Barbara declined the surgery and rebuilt her strength through physio and the gym.

A diabetes diagnosis as a wake-up call
A type 2 diagnosis in her mid-50s pushed her into healthier habits and into remission for two years.

Brain fog reframed
Women in their 60s have decades more information stored than younger people; what is labelled brain fog is information retrieval slowdown.

Anger after menopause is real
As life pressures lift, you have the headspace to notice ongoing inequalities, and that anger is not a hormonal mood swing.

Underestimated, not invisible
Being overlooked as an older woman gives you the element of surprise and the freedom to take risks without caring what people think.

The cost of conformity
A senior CEO told Barbara she would love to let her hair go grey but feared not being taken seriously at work.

Becoming an unmarried mother in 1987
Barbara remembers her father going upstairs to be sick, three weeks of silence, then a quiet "we'll stand by you" on a snowy morning.

A friendship with her mother
Her mother bought her her first baby cham at 12, set up her own business in her 50s and was a collaborator throughout Barbara's life.

📚 Resources

Wise Up — Barbara Scully
Memoir reflecting on the years after menopause.

Older Bolder Wiser
Barbara's one-woman comedy show currently touring Irish theatres.

Funny Women Ireland
Set up by Orla Doherty and Val Troy to promote women in comedy.

⏱️ Timestamps

00:00 — Hip pain and the MRI run-around
03:00 — Stepping off the treadmill of tests
07:30 — Type 2 diabetes and remission
09:30 — Why brain fog is not what we are told
11:00 — Anger after menopause is real
13:00 — Underestimated rather than invisible
17:00 — Letting the hair go grey
22:00 — The freedom of getting older
28:00 — A first smear test in the 80s
36:00 — Growing up tall and the slow set
44:00 — Giving up red wine and finding gin
48:00 — Her mother as collaborator
56:00 — Losing her mother in 2022
Thanks for listening! You can watch the full episode on YouTube here. Don’t forget to follow The Laura Dowling Experience podcast on Instagram @lauradowlingexperience for updates and more information. You can also follow our host, Laura Dowling, @fabulouspharmacist for more insights and tips. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review—it really helps us out! Stay tuned for more great conversations.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.