Unconditioning Love

Send us Fan Mail
Phoenix chose her name for what the phoenix represents: rebirth and transformation. In this conversation she shares her journey through three versions of herself: growing up in religion, stepping into a “high vibe” spirituality that turned out to be spiritual bypassing, and the season she’s in now, learning to slow down, ground, and truly live from the heart.
We talk about why “just up your vibe” isn’t love, how leaving religion taught her to take ownership instead of blaming the devil (or waiting on God), and why she’d rather manifest an open heart than material things. We also explore the difference between forgiveness and release, forgiving yourself for what you didn’t know, Ho’oponopono, and giving from wholeness instead of ego.

Connect with Phoenix on FB: https://www.facebook.com/SAVVYPHOENIX/
Support the show
1:1 Trauma-Informed Coaching with Lydia
Share your story on the podcast
Instagram & Threads
Spotify Music

Send us Fan Mail
When a brown recluse spider bite landed Teal in the hospital for weeks, everything else came apart with it: her job, her friendships, her sense of autonomy, even her hair. She calls it the darkest period of her life, and the most transformative one.
In this episode, Teal shares how she learned what unconditional love is from her mom, her best friend, and her husband. She talks about the night a meditation told her “your soulmate is in Paraguay,” and how a pots-and-pans band in third grade connects to the creativity she’s reclaiming now. We talk about outgrowing people, the dark night of the soul, and finding hope again when you’ve lost it.
If you’re in it right now, on the couch and finding your way out, this one is for you.
In this episode:
[00:32] Growing up in Kansas, a family car accident at nine months old, and a chaotic but happy childhood
[04:29] What love meant as a child, and the people who showed Teal unconditional love
[07:39] “Your soulmate is in Paraguay”: the meditation that changed the direction of her life
[10:42] Who she had to leave behind, and what happens when we won’t end what we’ve outgrown
[12:58] The spider bite, the wedding, and doing all the hard things at once
[14:22] The dark night of the soul, and why every loss had a purpose
[18:20] What Teal would say to the version of herself in the darkest moment
[19:46] How marriage became her biggest mirror
[23:28] What the hardest seasons gave her: hope, creativity, and gratitude
[26:07] Co-creation, collaboration, and being a lifelong learner
[30:31] For anyone in the dark right now: visualization, tiny steps, and keeping hope
[34:09] Choosing to love yourself in it, not once you’re out of it
[41:07] What unconditional love means to Teal
About Teal
Teal lives in Kansas with her Paraguayan husband and their cats. She studied psychology with a Spanish minor and spent a year living in Paraguay at 19. She’s a lifelong creative who is rediscovering herself through crochet, painting, music, and deep conversation.
Support the show
1:1 Trauma-Informed Coaching with Lydia
Share your story on the podcast
Instagram & Threads
Spotify Music

Send us Fan Mail
What do you do when the place that once kept you safe no longer fits who you are becoming?
Rosemary was born in Connecticut and raised in the 2x2s, the same church I grew up in. She professed at 10 years old, standing up beside her younger sister at a convention. For years, meetings were her safe place: the one space where everything was quiet and she could speak and truly be listened to.
But slowly, she began to feel restricted in what she could share. She noticed the perfectionism, the shame, and the messages about mistrusting the self. She realized she could no longer bring her authentic spiritual thoughts into the room. Within this past year, she made the brave, conscious choice to step away.
This conversation is told from the messy middle, and that is exactly what makes her story so powerful. She is the first guest I've had on the podcast who has very recently left, and sharing while you are still in it takes a whole different level of courage.
In this episode we talk about:
Growing up in the 2x2s and why meetings felt like a safe place
Leaving slowly and consciously, rather than in one big moment
Perfectionism, shame and feeling restricted in what you're allowed to say
Shifting from a God outside of us to a God within us, in others and in nature
Why our relationship with ourselves is our relationship with God
Moving from obligation to free will when it comes to taking time for yourself
A simple grounding practice for coming out of the head and home to the heart
Why inner-child work can feel different for those of us raised in high-control religion
How the body carries our relationships and what it is trying to tell us
Finding new community after leaving, one step at a time
What unconditional love means: putting yourself first, and giving and receiving without obligation
Mentioned in this episode:
Unitarian Universalist congregations (uua.org)
If this episode spoke to you, share it with someone who is standing in their own in-between. And if you'd like support on your journey of coming back home to yourself, you can find me at lydiakeeney.com.
Support the show
1:1 Trauma-Informed Coaching with Lydia
Share your story on the podcast
Instagram & Threads
Spotify Music

Send us Fan Mail
What if the hardest seasons of your life were part of a game your soul chose to play? And what if you could learn the rules?
This week on Unconditioning Love, Lidi talks with Ketty. Ketty was born in Paris to a family from Guadeloupe and raised by a single mother, who gave her an unusual gift: the freedom to choose her own path. She became a professional dancer and a marketing strategist. She spent ten years running a youth association in one of the toughest areas outside Paris, and later became a life coach and NLP practitioner in the Netherlands.
Then, after COVID, came a burnout and a deep depression. She had been trying to please everyone, and it brought her to the edge of wanting to disappear. From there Ketty began six months of going inward. She became a "detective" of her own life. She met the ancestral trauma of slavery she had carried without knowing it. And she discovered that loving herself was what finally let her love other people without conditions.
In this episode:
How a childhood that felt harsh turned out to be her mother's greatest gift
The moment she heard: "I didn't do it, you did it to yourself," and how accountability replaced victimhood
Rumi's "you are not a drop in the ocean, you are the entire ocean in a drop," and what it means to live as the ocean
Viktor Frankl's space between action and reaction, and how Ketty uses it to meet racism and ignorance with understanding instead of a fight
Why words are spells, and how what we say shapes the field we live in
Going back to the child who made the first choice, and thanking them for keeping you alive
Why falling back is not starting over ("when you fall back, you jump further")
Spiritual bypassing: why knowing something in your head isn't the same as your body living it
Ketty's advice for anyone in the dark right now: start with one small thing, like making your bed, and build momentum from there
Chapters:
00:00 Welcome, and Ketty's story from Paris
02:04 Dance, giving back and ten years with youth
03:30 Moving to the Netherlands, burnout and depression
08:49 Talking to God and becoming a detective of her own life
11:20 Returning to her roots and ancestral trauma
13:04 The Game of Life and How to Play It
14:45 The ocean in a drop
16:49 The space between action and reaction
22:00 A childhood dream: "everything is already here"
23:25 Mirror-based therapy and her new school
34:29 Words as spells
40:10 Life as a game we play together
48:03 A bridge for anyone who can't believe life could be a game yet
52:26 Falling back, and why the nervous system needs time
57:08 Spiritual bypassing: connecting mind, body and soul
1:02:05 Coaching from lived experience
Resources mentioned:
The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn
Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
Rumi
Connect with Ketty: Instagram Facebook
A note of care: this episode includes talk of depression and suicidal thoughts. If you're struggling, please reach out to someone you trust or a local crisis line. You don't have to walk through it alone. 💛
Support the show
1:1 Trauma-Informed Coaching with Lydia
Share your story on the podcast
Instagram & Threads
Spotify Music

Send us Fan Mail
In this first video episode of Unconditioning Love, Lydia goes solo — her scheduled guest couldn't make it, so instead she opens up about what it means to be in the messy, uncomfortable middle of transformation.
Using the image of a caterpillar dissolving into goo before it can become a butterfly, Lydia talks about why "stuckness" isn't a life sentence — it's a phase. She shares what's coming up in her six-week coaching container (currently in week three with five students), reflects on her own journey out of church life and into a therapist who finally "spoke her language," and offers real, accessible tools — like EFT tapping and meditation — for staying grounded while everything familiar dissolves around you.
If you've left a system, relationship, or belief that no longer fits and you're standing in the unknown wondering when it'll make sense again — this episode is for you. It won't, yet. And that's okay.
In this episode:
0:00 – Going solo & why video, now — Lydia's first video episode, and her intention to keep editing minimal so the conversation stays real and human.
0:48 – What "holding space" actually means — The podcast's purpose: unconditional love as a doorway back to your own light, not just surface-level "consciousness."
2:44 – Inside the 6-week coaching container — How week one (telling your story in 6–10 minutes) and week two (building your "movie script") help people find their through-line.
4:22 – The caterpillar goo metaphor — Why being stuck is temporary, why it looks different for everyone, and why pulling yourself out too soon can do more harm than staying in it.
6:14 – Building a new "safe" — What to do when the people and places that used to hold you don't anymore — and why leaving doesn't erase what you gained there.
8:33 – Finding a therapist who speaks your language — Lydia's own search for the right support after leaving the church, and a therapist's insight that this shift was inevitable all along.
12:20 – Why discomfort ≠ lack of peace — Untangling the belief that peace has to feel comfortable, and why movement — even shaky movement — is the real signal of growth.
16:38 – Tools for the goo — EFT tapping, meditation, and how Lydia is using her own move within Argentina as a live practice in tolerating the unknown.
Support the show
1:1 Trauma-Informed Coaching with Lydia
Share your story on the podcast
Instagram & Threads
Spotify Music