62 episodes
EP 61: Shame Thrives in Isolation, Here's What to Do Instead with Kristina Silvinski
10/08/2026 | 40 mins.One of the things I love most about this podcast is being able to bring you experts who can help explain why changing your relationship with alcohol is hard from a completely different angle. Today that angle is therapy, and my guest is really good at what she does.
Kristina Sliwinski is a licensed clinical therapist and founder of In Our Nature Therapy. With more than 20 years of experience helping people navigate trauma, anxiety, relationship challenges, and the emotional patterns that keep us stuck, Kristina brings a clinical lens to so many of the things I talk about every week from a coaching perspective.
What I love about Kristina's approach, and her practice name says it all, is that struggling is not a sign something is wrong with you. It's in our nature. And so is change.
She also came to this work through her own lived experience, moving through PTSD after a difficult season in the military and finding that therapy was the thing that made the difference.
This conversation is full of moments that made me stop and think, and I have a feeling it will do the same for you.
In this episode we cover:
What self-medicating actually looks like and why the person reaching for a drink at the end of the day is often doing something smart with wrong tools
The roller coaster analogy for anxiety and emotion, and why alcohol interrupts a natural process your body already knows how to complete
Why alcohol gives you short-term relief but reinforces the pattern and makes the emotion stronger over time
Practical psychological tricks for breaking the chain when a craving hits, including one involving oven mitts that I am absolutely trying
The power of buying yourself time and how even five minutes changes what your brain believes is possible
Decoupling the association between a trigger and the drink, and why that is the key to rewiring the habit
Shame and why it is heavier and more intense than almost any other emotion
How shame survives in isolation and actually thrives there, getting stronger the more you hide
Why you are not your shame, and how therapy helps you depersonalize it and see it as something you're experiencing, not something you are
What Kristina tells clients who are scared and don't know where to start
If this episode resonated with you and you're ready to take a closer look at your own relationship with alcohol, I would love to connect. Email me at maureen@soberfitchick.com or visit my website to learn more about working together. No obligation, just science-backed support that actually works.
Connect with Kristina
Website: inournaturetherapy.com
💬 Want to learn more about the tools I offer? 👇
Am I Drinking Too Much Quiz
Six-Week Alcohol Reset
Drink Less By Monday
Book a FREE Discovery Call
Follow me on Instagram- Maria Winters is a licensed mental health therapist with over 20 years of experience helping adolescents and adults build emotional wellness and healthier relationships. She's the founder of The Coaching Therapist, co-host of the Wellness Rebranded Podcast, and creator of the Emotional Fitness Studio, a free community in Annapolis focused on healing, connection, and growth. Maria is originally from Venezuela, and she brings a really unique perspective to this conversation because she has never been a drinker. And what surprised me when we started talking is that she still feels the social pressure and pushback around that choice all the time.
We also get into alcohol in the Latino culture, which is a conversation I hadn't had on this podcast yet, and Maria brought both her personal experience and 20 years of clinical work to it. It's eye-opening.
In this episode we talk about:
Maria's story as a lifelong non-drinker and why she still gets pushback at 49 years old
Why people assume there must be a big reason someone doesn't drink and what that reveals about our relationship with alcohol as a society
Alcohol in the Latino culture, including how heavy drinking has been normalized in ways the American culture is only now starting to question
The sober curious movement and why Maria had genuinely never heard of it before we talked
Why alcohol feels like a reward, a social connector, and a relaxation tool, and what's actually happening in the body while we think it's doing all those things
Nobody gets physically strong by avoiding hard workouts. The same is true for emotional resilience.
How Maria's 12 years working in an emergency room shaped her vision for the Emotional Fitness Studio
Why healing happens faster and better in community, and how isolation is one of alcohol's quieter costs
The Emotional Fitness Studio, what it is, how it works, why it's completely free, and how to find it
Maria's own daily practices for staying emotionally, mentally, and spiritually well
Connect with Maria:
Website: thecoachingtherapist.com (Emotional Fitness Studio tab for all upcoming events)
Podcast: Wellness Rebranded
Email: mwinters.lcpc@gmail.com
💬 Want to learn more about the tools I offer? 👇
My free webinar, September 9th
Am I Drinking Too Much Quiz
Six-Week Alcohol Reset
Drink Less By Monday
Book a FREE Discovery Call
Follow me on Instagram
If this episode resonated with you and you're ready to take a closer look at your own relationship with alcohol, I'd love to connect. Email me at maureen@soberfitchick.com or visit my website to learn more about working together. No labels, no pressure, just honest support that actually works. - I haven't talked about this publicly before, but today I'm going there.
Toward the end of my drinking, I got really good at damage control. After a heavy night, I'd wake up feeling completely wrecked, dehydrated, anxious, foggy, with my stomach in knots, ashamed, and I'd start looking for the fastest way to undo it. That usually meant calling an IV clinic. Sometimes they'd come to my house. I'd load up on hydration, vitamins, glutathione, anti-nausea medication, whatever they'd give me. And I'd spend up to $300 to $400 a session trying to erase what I'd done to myself.
Here's the thing I didn't understand at the time: you cannot magically undo a hangover. And in this episode, I break down exactly why (starting with what alcohol actually does inside your body ) and what I was really looking for every time I called that IV clinic.
Spoiler: it wasn't the IV. It was relief from how awful I felt physically and mentally. And the only thing that actually gave me that was stopping drinking altogether.
In this episode I cover:
My personal history with hangover IVs, party supplements, and expensive damage control strategies that didn't work
What actually happens in your liver when you drink, and why a hangover feels as brutal as it does
What glutathione is, why I kept asking for it, and the truth about whether it can undo the damage
Why sweating it out, greasy food, and Advil are all myths
The mindset shift I needed (I was working incredibly hard to keep drinking, just without consequences)
How the hangover recovery industry has normalized a cycle that deserves a closer look
My 4R method, Recognize, Replace, Rewire, Renew, and how it applies to breaking out of the damage control loop
The difference between practicing wellness and practicing damage control
What it actually feels like to not need recovery from drinking anymore
Resources mentioned:
Six-week Alcohol Reset with kickoff call September 21st (waitlist open now!)
Free webinar: It's Not Your Fault, It's Chemistry — September 9th
💬 Want to learn more about the tools I offer? 👇
Am I Drinking Too Much Quiz
Six-Week Alcohol Reset
Drink Less By Monday
Book a FREE Discovery Call
Follow me on Instagram
If any of this hit home, I want to hear from you. Email me at maureen@soberfitchick.com — I read and respond to every single one. Or visit my website to learn more about working together and grab your spot in the reset. - Long before anyone sits down to have "the talk" about alcohol, kids are already watching. They're watching how we unwind after a hard day. They're watching what we reach for at dinner parties. They're absorbing the message that this is just what adults do.
This week I'm joined by two people who know how to talk to kids about alcohol — Samantha Straub and Dr. Melissa Wellner, the duo behind the Parenting Shrink Wrapped Podcast. Sam is a licensed counselor, parenting coach, longtime educator, and founder of Teen Savvy Coaching. Dr. Wellner is a child, adolescent, and adult psychiatrist and owner of Annapolis Psychiatry. Together they bring clinical expertise and real, practical parenting wisdom to the conversations families are actually having around their kitchen tables.
I grew up watching cocktail parties in the 70s. I served hors d'oeuvres at my parents' dinner parties and thought it was the most sophisticated thing in the world. It logged something in my brain early. And sure enough, I became a martini drinker. That pattern started long before anyone handed me a drink.
That's exactly what this episode is about.
In this episode we cover:
How kids form beliefs about alcohol before anyone says a word — and what parents are accidentally modeling every day
Why "I know you're going to drink, so just call me" is actually giving tacit permission (and what to say instead)
The cool parent trap — why hosting parties at your house doesn't keep kids safer and actually takes away their escape hatch
The power of and — how to hold values AND stay connected to your teen without going all or nothing
Why teens wildly overestimate how many of their peers are drinking (the real number is much lower than you think)
"I need a glass of wine" vs. "I'm going to have a glass of wine" — why that language difference matters more than you realize
What to do when you yourself are using alcohol as a coping tool and you know your kids are watching
Building resilience and self-efficacy as the long game — and why it matters so much more than one conversation about drinking
Connect with Sam and Melissa:
Sam: teensavvycoaching.com — grab her free guide How to Have a You Screwed Up Conversation with Your Teen plus her LOVED Framework video series
Dr. Wellner: annapolispsychiatry.com
Parenting Shrink Wrapped Podcast: available on all major platforms and YouTube
Email them at parentingshrinkwrapped@gmail.com
If this episode resonated with you as a parent and you're realizing your own relationship with alcohol might be part of the picture, I'd love to talk.
Email me at maureen@soberfitchick.com or visit my website to learn more about working together. No labels, no judgment, just honest support.
💬 Want to learn more about the tools I offer? 👇
Am I Drinking Too Much Quiz
Six-Week Alcohol Reset
Drink Less By Monday
Book a FREE Discovery Call
Follow me on Instagram - I have been thinking about this question ever since a woman in one of my groups asked it out loud and I knew I had to dedicate an entire episode to it.
She said, "Why am I working so hard to keep this substance in my life?"
That's it. That's the whole question. And I promise you, if you sit with it honestly, it will shift something.
Because most of us (and I was absolutely one of them) are not asking that question. We're asking how I can moderate better, how I can drink less, and how I can keep the fun part without the consequences. We are in the negotiation cycle endlessly. And this one question interrupts all of it.
This is a solo episode, and I go deep on why this question matters, what it reveals, and what to do with it. No shame, no labels, just honesty and brain science.
In this episode I cover:
The question one of my group clients asked that stopped me cold, and why I wish I'd asked it years earlier
The detox-retox negotiation cycle: what it looks like, why it's exhausting, and why willpower will never be enough to break it
Why most of us aren't actually protecting the drink — we're protecting what we think the drink gives us (relief, confidence, connection, reward)
Fading effect bias — the sneaky reason you always end up back at the store after a few good days
Why shame and self-blame will never create lasting habit change — and what the science actually says works
My 4R Method — Recognize, Replace, Rewire, Renew — and how it works
💬 Want to learn more about the tools I offer? 👇
Am I Drinking Too Much Quiz
Six-Week Alcohol Reset
Drink Less By Monday
Book a FREE Discovery Call
Follow me on Instagram
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About Sober Fit Life
Sober Fit Life is the podcast for anyone caught in the cycle of drinking more than they want to, swearing it off, and ending up right back where they started—sometimes in the same day. If you're tired of the bloating, brain fog, shame, and mental tug-of-war over alcohol, you're not alone—and you're in the right place.
Hosted by Maureen Benkovich, a former weekend binge drinker turned alcohol freedom coach, the show features real conversations with health pros, wellness experts, and people who’ve broken free from the cycle and reclaimed their health, clarity, and confidence.
This isn’t about perfection—it’s about alignment. About finally living like the version of you that’s been buried under regret, excuses, and habits that don’t match your values. Expect honest stories, science-backed insight, and the kind of support that helps you feel proud of your choices—and strong enough to make new ones.
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