Clear the air

• 30: Discover your relationship attachment style with Serafin Upton

  As the saying goes, “Love is a verb,” and healthy relationships require intention, attention, time, and care. However, from our Clearhead data, we can see out of all of the people on our platform who said they were struggling with mental health challenges due to personal reasons, “General Relationship Struggles,” “Family Difficulties,” and “Partner Difficulties” were the top 3 issues people were dealing with. To help us grasp a greater understanding of what a fulfilling relationship should look like, how we can find them, and more importantly how to maintain them, our expert guest today is Serafin Upton.Serafin’s biography:Serafin Upton has worked in New Zealand and Australia as a family, couples' and sex therapist for over 20 years. On top of her extensive experience and qualifications, she has also trained under world-renowned sex and relationship therapists Esther Perel and Terry Real.In this episode, we dive deep into answering the following thorny questions:00:00 - Intro01:55 - Serafin’s journey to becoming a couples, child, family, and sex therapist03:25 - What is the common fear that everyone has regardless of their stage of life04:40 - What are the skills you need to develop to have healthy relationships06:20 - What is one thing you can do to become more attuned to someone you care about08:30 - How can you stay present for your romantic partner when you are really busy10:40 - How reflecting back and following up with your partner is key12:30 - Can your attachment style change depending on the relationship?14:05 - How to develop a secure attachment style if you have an avoidant attachment style16:15 - How to develop a secure attachment style if you have an anxious attachment style17:45 - How does emotional intimacy vs physical intimacy change over time in long term relationships22:20 - Tips on how to create space for romance and connection in long term relationships24:05 - Should making time for fun in a relationship be scheduled or spontaneous 26:10 - Advice for developing connection for people who are single27:35 - How to deal with rejection in online dating such as ‘ghosting’29:15 - Are we meant to be single or in relationships33:15 - Is there a difference between being lonely vs being alone35:45 - How your fear of being judged or misunderstood prevents you from developing meaningful relationships37:05 - How to build your tolerance to being vulnerable when sharing in a relationship38:45 - Tips on conflict management in relationships43:30 - Do the type of fights you see in movies happen in real life45:20 - How do you get someone who is conflict avoidant to express their needs47:30 - When is the best time to raise issues you have with your partner49:00 - How do you not get defensive when someone raises an issue with you50:50 - Why is it important to let someone know if you think they are in an abusive or toxic relationship53:40 - How does Serafin assess if someone is in an abusive relationship55:35 - What are examples of psychological violence in a relationship57:00 - What are the red flags that signal you should leave an abusive relationship58:25 - What is the impact of relationship on our mental health59:50 - What is Serafin’s one wellbeing practiceLearn more about Serafin: https://serafinupton.co.nz Learn more about Clearhead: https://www.myclearhead.com/

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• 29: Get the best sleep of your life with Dr. Michael Breus

  Sleep is at the very centre of our wellbeing. Getting a good night's rest is crucial for both the body and mind, allowing us to repair, reset, and be ready for whatever the day throws at us. In this session, we'll be joined by sleep specialist Dr. Michael Breus to learn about the relationship between sleep and mental health and unpack how to set ourselves up to have a good night's sleep, every night.Michael’s biography:Dr. Michael Breus, Ph.D., is a double board-certified Clinical Psychologist and Clinical Sleep Specialist who has been in private practice for 23 years. He is the founder of sleepdoctor.com, and for over 14 years he served as the Sleep Expert for WebMD. Recently, he was named the Top Sleep Specialist by Reader’s Digest. His expertise lies in the science of sleep and peak performance as well as treating sleep disorders such as sleep apnea, narcolepsy, insomnia, restless legs syndrome, and more.In this episode, we dive deep into answering the following thorny questions0:00 - Intro1:50 - Michael’s journey to becoming a sleep specialist 6:30 - Why 75% of insomnia is caused by poor mental health7:45 - How CBT (therapy) is used to cure insomnia15:15 - How do you know whether you have a good quality sleep or not16:30 - How should we interpret sleep metrics17:30 - What are common disruptors of sleep17:50 - Understanding REM and NREM sleep19:15 - What test can you do when you have a poor quality of sleep21:45 - Should you take supplements to improve your sleep22:40 - What is the recommended quantity (hours) of sleep24:15 - What can you do when you wake up at night and can’t go back to sleep29:00 - What is a breathing technique to calm down and fall asleep33:30 - Should you get up or try to fall back asleep35:30 - Should you take a nap before your normal bedtime when you are tired37:00 - What can you do if you are a light sleeper or have trouble falling asleep38:15 - When should you seek professional help if you have insomnia39:45 - Do sleeping pills provide you a good quality of sleep41:45 - What can you do to get better sleep if you are a shift worker or are jet-lagged44:50 - When is the best time to be intimate if you have a different chronotype to your partner48:30 - How can understanding your family member’s chronotype lead to positive interactions50:00 - What is the role of sleep hygiene and the negative impact of alcohol52:00 - What is a normal amount of time we need to fall asleep54:00 - What is the connection between sleep and peak performance54:50 - What is Michael’s one wellbeing practiceLearn more about Michael Breushttps://www.linkedin.com/in/thesleepdoctorLearn more about Clearhead: https://www.myclearhead.com/

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• 28: Understanding Mental Health Disorders and Neurodivergence with Professor Marie Bismark

  The human brain is an incredibly complex organ. We are all wired to process emotions, thoughts, and behaviours differently due to a range of factors, including our genetics and the environment. Sometimes, individuals develop serious mental health disorders such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, or are considered neurodivergent, with neurodevelopmental conditions such as autism or ADHD. Learning how to understand the way that these experiences shape us is crucial to our overall wellbeing, which is why we are joined by our expert guest, Marie Bismark, to unpack all the nuances behind diagnosing mental health disorders and the best ways to manage them. Marie’s biography: Professor Marie Bismark is a psychiatrist, public health physician, and health lawyer. She divides her time between New Zealand and Australia. In addition to her clinical work, Marie leads a research team at the University of Melbourne, focusing on the interface between patient safety and clinician wellbeing. She serves as a Director of several health sector organisations including the Royal Women’s Hospital and Summerset aged care. Marie completed a Harkness Fellowship at Harvard and her research has influenced regulatory policy in Australia and internationally. In this episode, we dive deep into answering the following thorny questions:0:00 - Intro 2:35 - What is the definition of a mental health disorder?3:40 - What is bipolar disorder?7:35 - What is schizophrenia?9:55 - What is the role of medication and therapy in mental health treatment?12:40 - What is the role of the social determinants of health in developing mental health illness?14:00 - What are the causes of mental health disorders?15:55 - Why is developing self-awareness is the first step towards treatment?19:40 - Are there tests that can be done to confirm a mental health diagnosis?22:10 - How to determine the severity of a mental illness?26:10 - The role of family in supporting mentally unwell individuals28:05 - How should we be supporting caregivers?29:45 - What are the challenges and strengths of being neurodiverse? (Autism and ADHD)33:25 - What can workplaces do to support neurodiverse individuals?35:00 - How to best manage your ADHD to optimise functioning37:25 - How to best manage your Autism to optimise functioning38:50 - What happens if you are misdiagnosed42:05 - Why neurodiverse individuals often also have mental illness45:35 - The over-medicalisation of normal emotional responses48:30 - Why Marie decided to become a psychiatrist50:45 - What are the consequences of untreated mental health illness54:35 - What workplaces can do to support employees’ mental wellbeing and resilience 56:40 - What is Marie’s one wellbeing practice?57:20 - What is the role of nutrition and lifestyle changes to maintain mental wellbeing?Learn more about Marie:https://www.linkedin.com/in/marie-bismark-2397831b/Learn more about Clearhead: https://www.myclearhead.com/

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• 27: Eating Disorders: Recovery Journey with Genevieve Mora

  Over the last 5 years, hospital visits related to eating disorders has doubled, and those being diagnosed are getting younger and often presenting with a more serious condition. The reasons for why someone develops an eating disorder is a complicated process with biological, psychological, genetic and social-cultural factors at play. It is also important to acknowledge that it is also a long and difficult process when supporting a loved one on their recovery journey. In this episode, we will hear from Genevieve Mora as she shares her personal journey to recovery and her advice for any individuals dealing with an eating disorder. Genevieve’s biography: Genevieve spent most of her teenage years trying to managing both her OCD and anorexia nervosa. As part of her recovery, she has made it her mission to offer hope to those who are struggling themselves. Genevieve co-founded Voices of Hope, and through this platform, she uses her lived experience to show people that recovery is possible and that there is no shame in having a mental illness. Genevieve is the author of ‘Bite Back - a compassionate guide to navigating Eating Disorders,’ and the co-creator of Love your Kite, an eating disorder resource app. Alongside Jazz Thornton, her cofounder, she was named in 2023 Forbes Asia 30 under 30.In this episode, we dive deep into answering the following thorny questions:0:00 - Intro 2:25 - How did Gen’s mental illness journey begin?5:00 - Why did Gen develop Anorexia Nervosa?8:55 - What were the challenges Gen faced while having an eating disorder?11:25 - What was the turning point towards her recovery?13:45 - Why the denial phase prevents recovery from an eating disorder15:25 - Did Gen feel judged about her mental illness?17:00 - What is a typical recovery journey?19:35 - How to help individuals move past the pre-contemplative (denial) phase 21:35 - How to avoid unhelpful language when supporting someone who is struggling with an eating disorder 24:15 - Are there more young men struggling with eating disorders?25:45 - Has Gen experience relapses after recovery?28:00 - Is recovery based only from the perspective of the individual going through the mental illness, or from the perspective of the people supporting them?31:40 - What Gen does to stay mentally well 33:45 - What parents can do to try and prevent their child from develop an eating disorder 37:00 - What has Gen learnt from running a charity about the community's mental health and lived experiences?39:45 - What is the role that workplaces can play in supporting individuals?41:00 - Why did Gen develop an eating disorder resource app?43:30 - What did Gen learn after people starting using her app?45:20 - What is Gen hopeful about the eating disorder space?46:17 - What is Gen’s message to those who are supporting loved ones struggling with an eating disorder?47:20 - Is there any difference for those who are overeating compared to those who are restricting their intake?49:00 - What is Gen’s one wellbeing practice? Learn more about Gen:https://thevoicesofhope.org/pages/teamhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/genevieve-mora-a02948174/?originalSubdomain=nzHelpful resource: (Genevieve's book)https://www.penguin.co.nz/books/bite-back-9781776950447Learn more about Clearhead: https://www.myclearhead.com/

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• 26: Eliminating Toxic Workplace Dynamics with David Emerald Womeldorff

  Have you ever been in a conflict with someone and came out feeling like a victim? Or do you find yourself in dysfunctional relationships where communication between each other is difficult? Whether at work or at home, you might find yourself trapped in the dreaded Karpman drama triangle. In psychology, it is used to describe a cycle where we can find ourselves in one of these 3 common roles the "victim," "persecutor" or "rescuer." In this episode, our guest David Emerald Womeldorff will dive into how you can learn to escape the Drama Triangle and feel more empowered in your communication and relationships. David’s biography: Drawing on over 30 years of experience in in leadership development, leading through change, self-leadership, and employee engagement, David is the author of 2 best-selling books, The Power of TED (The Empowerment Dynamic), as well as 3 Vital Questions: Transforming Workplace Drama. Both of his books draw on his extensive experience in the field, and David also served for 20 years as a senior consultant for The Leadership Circle and as an Executive Coach at the University of Notre Dame's Executive Leadership Program. He shares his frameworks to inspires individuals and organisations to reach new levels of collaboration through empowering relationships and work from an outcome-focused and passion-powered orientation. In this episode, we dive deep into answering the following thorny questions:0:00 - Intro2:25 - How did David get started? 5:35 - What is the difference between victimization and victimhood? 8:00 - What is the karpman drama triangle? 9:55 - How can you break free of the drama triangle (The Empowerment Dynamic)? 13:00 - Why focusing on outcomes instead of which version of current reality is correct is key. 15:40 - What are the 3 vital questions to end workplace conflict? 18:45 - How can you shift from a reactive response to problems to a more empowering response instead? 24:35- What are the common causes of workplace drama? 26:00 - What are the 3 reactive strategies to challenges that are unhelpful? 29:20 - How can you stop yourself from being reactive to problems? 31:30 - How to create more positive relationship dynamics 34:07 - How do you develop leaders in the workplace 38:35 - What are the characteristics of high performing leaders? 42:50 - How to give constructive feedback from a growth mindset? 45:15 - What happens if the person receiving the feedback is being defensive 48:40 - How can individual employees create psychological safety in their workplace culture 52:10 - When is conflict at work unhealthy 55:00 - Are there generational differences to consider in workplace drama 56:55 - How can you effectively lead those who are neurodiverse 59:00 - What is David’s one wellbeing practice?Learn more about David:https://www.linkedin.com/in/david-emerald-womeldorff-bab4494/Helpful resource:https://theempowermentdynamic.com/about/

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